Master (8 page)

"Are you a guest?" Anna went on. "If so,
enjoy." She went to move past him. He stopped her by taking hold of her
arm.

"Not so fast."

Anna could tell he held his strength in check. The muscles
on his arms were tense; the veins stood out, and a pulse beat fast in his neck.
She raised an eyebrow in query. It didn't seem to faze him.

"Why are you here?" His voice was deep and demanding.
As usual it affected her like no other ever did.

How to answer? Anna swallowed.
Caden's
face was a blank canvas. He could have been speaking to a stranger and asking
the time.

"I'm a member." Technically, it was true. All
employees were. As
Linsey
hadn't accepted her notice,
Anna felt confident she was on the right side of
Dommissima's
rules.

"Then you should abide by the rules. You kneel when you
speak to a Master."

Bastard.
He had her
there. Then Anna remembered something. "This is newbie night so to speak.
So it's less formal.
And to be honest?
No one is my
master, with or without a capital 'M'."

There was another gasp, and Anna was fairly sure she saw
Linsey
put her had to her mouth. Anna was unrepentant. Her
knickers might need wringing
out,
and her nipples
about to poke through her blouse—
Cade
always had that
effect on her—but she wasn't going to submit in any way. Not now, not there.
It's always the other people watching that
screws me, every time.

"I came because it's time to bury my demons and get rid
of my past life," she said clearly. His grip tightened.
 
Good,
let him see I don't care anymore. Well even if I do, I'm not letting him know.
"Let go of me,
Caden
, I'm not
your
…"
her voice trailed off. The flash of anger in his eyes frightened her. Her skin
crawled. What on earth had she done?

"My what?" he asked his voice as smooth as the
silk of her blouse.

"Your anything," she finished. Her nails made tiny
crescents in her palms, and she bet there'd be blood. Why oh why was she
baiting him now after all this time? Did she have a death wish, or a wish to be
taken in hand and shown who was boss? Where had that thought come from? Anna
felt sick.
Cade's
face was devoid of any emotion.
Only the pulse in his neck showed he wasn't a statue.

"You think not?" His voice was mild, too mild.

Anna swallowed. One day she'd learn not to open her mouth
and put both feet in.

"I suggest that as you watch my demonstration, you
refresh your memory…" He paused and bent his head. His breath tickled her
ear.
"Wife."

Caden
straightened and beckoned to
Athol who had been watching the exchange as he stood next to
Linsey
. Master Fergus had ushered the interested group of
bystanders away, and the four of them could have been cocooned in their own
little world.

"Make her watch or send her away." His tone
conveyed nothing except boredom. He turned and walked away, evidently not
caring what the answer was.

"Demonstration?"
Anna asked Athol. "What
fucking demonstration. I thought this was a newbie meet the sub night. You
know, ask questions and such."

"And see demos. Hell, Anna you should know that. You do
all the paperwork."

 
"Did it
all," she replied, and hoped she wasn't going to throw up. "I don't
now. Nowhere did I arrange for him to be here. That's next month."

And
dammit
for remembering.

"This is an extra."
Linsey
approached them. "Hello, Anna. I see you've decided to break down the
doors and see what's inside. Pity you left it to tonight."

"Isn't it just."
Anna was seething. They'd
both known
Caden
was here, and neither thought to
warn her. She blocked out the fact that until she'd met Athol as his shift
ended they had no idea she was going to attend. "However, I can soon
rectify that. I'll go."

"Oh no you won't, you coward."
Caden
had returned, and Anna hadn't noticed. "You'll stop and watch if I have to
shackle you to a chair. This has gone on long enough. For fuck's sake, you
should see yourself.
Green as a lettuce and shaking like a
leaf in a breeze.
Where's my vibrant, sassy sub? My wife who was with me
all the way?
My
Shibari
partner?
Look at you; all buttoned up like a prissy virgin. What have you done to
yourself?"

Anna turned on him, and her hand shot out and caught him
hard across the jaw. His head jerked back, and she took a step away. Now she'd
done it. Fury was nothing to what she saw on his face.

"Want to play, do we?
On your
knees."
He leaned on her shoulders. Anna had no intention of
obeying. She hooked her foot around his ankle and pushed down hard, the way
he'd shown her all those years ago. The fact she was shoeless didn't help her,
but surprise did. For one moment she thought she'd won, but she was no match
for sheer brute strength. Her legs buckled, and she was on her knees and
sobbing for breath.
Caden
pressed on her neck.

"Assume the position, Anna."

 
"Fuck off."

The pressure increased.
Cade
laughed
. Damn him, he's enjoying this,
the bastard.
She tried to ignore the liquid seeping out of her channel and
down her legs. Her curls were wet, and her knickers chafed.

"Ana, do you want me to gag you? Do as you're
told."

"No.
And no.
I'm not yours to
play with,
Cade
." She twisted her head.
"And you're hurting me."

 
The pressure eased,
and she took deep breaths.

"
Why're
you fighting
this?"
Cade
asked in a mild voice. "You
want to return, or why else are you here?" He stroked her hair. The soft
touch was as erotic as any form of lovemaking. Her pussy
spasmed
,
and Anna realized
with horror it would take very little to make her come.

"
Er
, let me up." Was
that weak pathetic voice really her? "Please,
Cade
,
or I'll scream assault, and anything else I can do."

 
His hand stopped
moving, and she took advantage of his inaction to scramble to her feet.

"Thank you." Her voice was laced with sarcasm. She
looked at
Linsey
and Athol and hoped they could see
her contempt. "I'm going now. If I get to walk out of here, unmolested,
and unchallenged, I'll forget all this. Otherwise be warned. I'll make a stink.
A very big one."

"Threats, Anna?"
Caden
took her chin in his hand. "I don't think you're in any position to make
threats. Remember a certain photo?"

"Blackmail,
Caden
?' she
retorted in as sugar-sweet tone as she could manage
. "
Publish
and be damned. You're right. I need to grow up." Although how she was
going to achieve that when she wanted to be sick over his shoes, and wasn't sure
her legs would carry her to the door Anna had no idea.
So
much for facing her demons.
Now all she had to do was get out of there,
get home, and have a good cry. Then accept that as much as she'd be happy to do
anything
Caden
wanted in private, 'in private' were
the operative words. She shivered and felt goose bumps cover her skin.
Caden's
eyes narrowed. He ran his hand up her arm, under
the blouse.

"For fuck’s sake, Anna, you're freezing. Athol get me a
subbie
blanket and a mug of hot milk, please. And bring
it into my room." He lifted Anna into his arms as if she weighed nothing.

 
Anna began to
struggle. In truth, being held by
Cade
was like
coming home, but she daren't let herself enjoy it. It was what might come after
she couldn't cope with.

"I hate hot milk. And I'm not going anywhere with you,
Caden
McCourt."

"Exactly, we're not going anywhere except in here. You
said you want to grow up and move on? Prove it."

"Pardon?"
Anna jiggled in his arms as
he walked across the main room and into a small cozy room off to one side. He
put her down on a soft sofa and pushed her back gently to rest on the
squidgy
cushions along the back. Athol had followed them
with a soft blanket, which he handed to
Caden
.
Caden
wrapped her up and held it close to her body. Anna melted
into its comforting warmth. Now if she could just stay like this she'd be
happy.
Cade
, however, had other ideas. He waited
until Athol had left the room and they were alone before he spoke. Then his
words sent tentacles of fear crawling over her.

"Prove it. Anna. Show me you're over whatever bugged
you. Watch me, or even better be my partner. Show me you're grown up. Let me
tie you."

Anna froze.

****

Cade
wished Anna would say
something, and not just stare at him as if he had three heads, or was a python
about to strike.

Well?" he asked after the silence had stretched so long
it was uncomfortable.

She looked him up and down. Sadly, it wasn't the sort of
glance to make his cock stir and become interested. More the sort of look that
shriveled his cock and made it
hide
behind his balls
for protection.

"No." She paused. "Thank you."

It was the biggest blow to him since she walked out. Why
he'd thought she might say yes,
Cade
had no idea.
After all a leopard didn't change his spots.
Or he realized,
Anna her ideas. It was then that
Cade's
vision of a
happy ever after faded and died.

"Then I suggest you leave," he said in as even a
tone as he could manage.
Fuck her.
His heart may have been ripped out and in tatters, but no way would he show
her. "Because I'll tell you now, my love, if you stay, by god I'll use you
as an example, so help me. You loved it before. You got off on my tying you.
Don't deny it. It showed by the sheen on your skin. The way your voice hitched
and that sexy little pulse in your neck beat so fast. You were so turned on I
had one hell of a time denying you your release. Your arousal coated you, and
your legs and that beautiful pussy were covered in the evidence.
For fuck’s sake."
His frustration overflowed. What was
he missing? "You loved it, Anna. You showed me, you loved what we could
do.
And then?
Well then, you little coward. You scared
yourself, and you ran." His chest heaved.
Cade
knew he was so close to crying it was stupid. To get worked up over something
that happened so long ago was silly. Nevertheless, it had stayed with him,
throbbing like a festering wound over the years. Never healing, always there as
a reminder he'd failed and he didn't know why.

She struggled out of the blanket and his arms.
Cade
felt as if he'd lost something special. It had been
heaven holding her again.

"Why, Anna?"

She stared at him, and the wounded look was almost his
undoing.
Caden
hardened his heart. He intended to get
answers, and if she weren't willing to help him, then he'd have to get closure
somehow and move on.

"Well?" he asked again after he decided she wasn't
going to answer him. "Cat got your tongue, love?"

"No," she said. Her voice quavered, and it gave
him hope. She wasn't as unaffected as she said. "Don't bully me,
Cade
. I might have reacted to those tactics years ago, but
not now. If I say no, it's my prerogative. You might be the great Master, but
not to me. Now you go and tie someone up, but don't expect me to watch. Or be
that poor sod." She sniffed. "Oh lord, no, not poor sod. It's not that—that's
good. It's the rest. It's the eyes…"

She swayed.
Cade
caught her before
she fell. "
Dammit
, Anna, why are you here if you
feel like this? I mean, okay, working outside in reception is bad enough, but
to turn up tonight and decide to lay your demons, why?" He gave her a tiny
shake, just enough to make her blink and take a deep breath. "Why,
love?"

Anna blinked and sighed. It was the saddest sound
Cade
had ever heard.

"Because I need to move on," she whispered.
"I loved
you,
Cade
, but
you tore me to pieces. I wasn't enough for you, was I? Not even when I tried to
be what you wanted. I never measured up. Oh, don't deny it." She put her
finger over his mouth.
"You never said, I knew you
wouldn't.
But I could see it. Every time I said red, or please no. Every
time I let you go off to the club alone. God, I knew you were playing with
other people, and it crucified me. I wasn't enough. I'd never be enough."
She choked on a sob. "So I decided. I loved you so much I had to let you
go. Let you fly. I never wanted to leave the ground. I was so stupid to think I
could. If you still love me, even a little bit,
Cade
,
let me go. Let me give you what you need, and let me go."