Marriage Can Be Murder -- Every Wife Has A Story (A Carol and Jim Andrews Baby Boomer Mystery) (35 page)

Is your destination location easily accessible for guests?
Will travel and lodging expenses be prohibitive for some people you really want to attend? Without your guests, there is no party! Choosing the location will affect them, too.

Does your location have a variety of accommodation options for all budgets, family sizes, length of stay, and so forth?
Some of your guests may want to make a vacation out of it, while others may just want a one-night stay.

Are you comfortable on the phone and online?
Planning a destination wedding will require a great deal of research to track down vendors, discuss and finalize details, and generally ensure that your day will run smoothly.

When selecting your wedding date and location, are you taking busy travel weekends, such as holidays, into consideration?
Consider traffic patterns, flight costs, hotel costs, venue and vendor costs, etc.

How organized are you?
Are you good at keeping track of contracts, files and contact information? Planning a long-distance wedding will definitely need a lot organization and pre-planning before the big day.

Are you allowing enough time for planning?
Be sure you allow for enough time between your engagement and your wedding date for putting together a destination wedding. There are a many, often changeable, parts to consider.

What does your choice of destination mean to you and your fiancé?
Did you vacation there, grow up there, or just choose it on a whim? Have you ever visited this location at the time of year you’d like to have your wedding?

Have you considered the seasons/weather of your destination and planned accordingly?
Have you looked at the sunset times for your ceremony? Is there a viable rain plan option if you want an outdoor ceremony and/ or reception? The weather can play a major role in your big day!

Still trying to decide if a destination wedding is right for you? If you have any other questions about planning your destination wedding, check out our website, www.capecodcelebrations.com. We’re here to help.

Planning a Wedding in Massachusetts

By Marie Sherman, Cape Cod Justice of the Peace

To be married in the Commonwealth of Massachusetts by a clergy person or a Justice of the Peace, the law requires the following steps:

1) The couple must appear together at any city or town hall to fill out a form entitled “Intention To Be Married.” This will contain all the information that is necessary to be transferred to the actual Marriage License. From the date the form is filed, the license will be valid for 60 days. The designated fee is paid to the Clerk at that time. Each city/town may set their own fee for a license, presently averaging $25.00.

2) Blood tests for syphilis are no longer required to obtain a Marriage License.

3) Because of the three-day waiting period, the couple will not leave with a license in hand but must wait three days to return to pick it up. They do not have to go together to pick it up. There is no purpose for the delay except that an archaic law remains on the books giving couples three days to think it over, or not get married in the heat of passion!

4) If a couple does not have three days prior to the wedding to file for their license, the only remedy is to obtain a waiver of the three days through a Probate or District Court judge in the Commonwealth (for a fee), and bring that to a city/town hall where their license can be issued that day. It’s best to avoid this extra expense and stress when possible.

5) Since 2005, Massachusetts has allowed gay marriages.

6) An individual may apply through the Massachusetts Secretary of State’s office for a “One-Day Designation,” which entitles that person to officiate at a wedding. The application should be filed several weeks prior to the wedding date as the process tends to be slow.

7) The clergy, Justice of the Peace, or Designated Individual officiating must have the valid Marriage License on the day of the wedding in order to perform the ceremony. No license – no wedding. The officiate has the obligation of returning the executed Marriage License within a few days to the city or town hall where the license was issued.

If a couple wishes to be married by a Justice of the Peace, some have personal websites and most are listed on various other websites, such as the Chambers of Commerce in their area, and www.findajp.com; this is a nationwide listing. Town Hall clerks and most large inns offer a list of names and contact numbers.

Ways To Prevent Cyberstalking

The Association for Progressive Communications (www.apc.org) has an excellent list of tips on their website. Here are some of their helpful suggestions:

• Be careful of what personal information you share on line.

• Create a different e-mail account for registering on social networking sites.

• Do not feel obligated to fill out all the fields when registering online.

• In your online profile, use a photo that doesn’t identify you or your location.

• Consider using a name that is not your real one or an easily recognizable nickname as your e-mail name, screen name, or user i.d.

• If you are breaking up with an intimate partner, reset every single password on all your accounts.

• Services such as Facebook change their privacy policy all the time, so check your own privacy settings to be sure you are only sharing personal information with people you trust.

• Find out/control what information family and friends are posting about you.

• Do an Internet search of your name regularly.

• Make sure your Internet service provider has an acceptable policy that prohibits cyberstalking.

Other suggested websites to check for information on preventing cyberstalking are www.datehookup.com and www.police.uncc.edu.

In addition, YouTube has a short video with additional prevention tips.

About the Author

An early member of the Baby Boomer generation, Susan Santangelo has been a feature writer, drama critic and editor for daily and weekly newspapers in the New York metropolitan area, including a stint at
Cosmopolitan
magazine.

A seasoned public relations and marketing professional, she has designed and managed not-for-profit events and programs for over 25 years, and was principal of her own public relations firm, Events Unlimited, in Princeton New Jersey, for ten years. She also served as Director of Special Events and Volunteers for Carnegie Hall during the Hall’s 1990-1991 Centennial season.

Susan divides her time between Cape Cod Mass. and the Connecticut shoreline. She is a member of Sisters in Crime and the Cape Cod Writers Center, and also reviews mysteries for
Suspense Magazine
. She shares her life with her husband Joe and two English cocker spaniels: Tucker and Boomer.

A portion of the sales from the Baby Boomer Mysteries is donated to the Breast Cancer Survival Center, a non-profit organization based in Connecticut which Susan founded in 1999 after being diagnosed with cancer herself.

You can contact Susan at ssantangelo@aol.

Or find her on Facebook and Twitter.

She’d love to hear from you.

Attention Book Clubs

If you have made
Retirement Can Be Murder
,
Moving Can Be Murder
, or
Marriage Can Be Murder
your book club selection and would like to have Susan Santangelo discuss the book with your group, please send an e-mail to [email protected] and we’ll do our best to accommodate you.