Mara and Dann (51 page)

‘I don't work here,' said Dalide. ‘I only came to meet you. I wanted to have a good look at you.'

‘And you've done that.'

‘I've done that. So, goodbye – for now.'

Dalide made her way out of the crowded room and Mara looked for Dann, but he had disappeared. Then the same waiter, seeing her standing here, pointed at another door, this time an open one. She went in. And saw a smaller room full of tables where mostly men were gambling. Dann stood by one, with Bergos, and watched the fast movement of the hands throwing dice. She went to Dann, who when he saw her said, ‘Let's go home.' He sounded irritated. If she had not come then, he would soon have been seated among the gamblers. Dann exchanged a few low words with Bergos. Mara and he went out into the
street, which was not crowded now. Mara was conscious of the heavy bag of coins which she was trying to conceal, and said, ‘Dann, let's go quickly.' And he said, ‘How much did you get?'

And now for the first time in her life Mara lied to him and said she had changed one gold coin and not two.

When they got safely back to the room, Mara fiddled with the coins, so that they would not seem as many as there were, sitting half turned from Dann. She gave him half of the worth of one coin, and told him that their gold coins were not known here and probably were much more valuable than they knew.

Dann lay on his bed looking up out of the window at the moon that was coming up again to the full. His face – oh, how afraid she felt, seeing it; and then he was asleep, and she could look directly at him, and wonder, Is that the new Dann, who seemed to be her enemy, or was it the real Dann, her friend? How was it possible that a person can turn into somebody not himself, just like that … But perhaps this new person, whom she disliked and feared, was the real person, not the one she thought of as real. After all, when he had been General Dann, with that boy, what was he then?

She slept with the little bag of money under her arm, and in the morning Dann was not there. The proprietor said he had gone out for a walk with Bergos. Mara paid him what was owed, and he said, ‘So, how did you find Mother Dalide?' Mara merely smiled at him, meaning, Mind your own business, while feeling it was probably his business too, and felt herself go quite cold when she heard him whisper, ‘Be careful. You must be careful.' And then, as he glanced about for possible eavesdroppers, ‘Leave. You must leave this town.'

And now there was a lot she wanted to ask, but had to stand back as some people came to ask for rooms. She and Dann had said that there were people who liked them very much and helped them: was this man one? More people wanted to pay their bills and leave. So Mara thought, I'll ask him later, when I can get him alone, and she went out. She wanted to walk up a little hill that overlooked the town, so as to get a good view of it, spread out; but she was feeling so uneasy she sat down at a table outside an inn in the central part, where customers ate and drank under a canopy of green leaves and red flowers. They also watched people passing on the pavement, and commented on them and their clothes. And the passers seemed to know they were being discussed and did not mind, but on the contrary were self-conscious, like performers.

Mara knew that she was being observed. In this town surveillance was discreet, invisible; she did not believe it was the police who were watching her now. Who, then?

A girl passing with a tray of some kind of yellow drink, put a mug of it down in front of Mara, who was suddenly sure that this mug had been apart from the others, put there for a purpose. She put back the mug on the tray and took another. The girl gave her an offended look. Mara thought, Well, it might have been poisoned, anything is possible. I should go away from here – meaning both this place and Bilma. But having got up, she sat down again, for she had seen Dann coming along the street with Bergos and a new man, a Mahondi – a real one? Yes, he was, like herself and Dann. She liked the look of him as much as she disliked Bergos. The three men sat down at a table well away from her, but she knew Dann had seen her, and was pretending not to. They sat chatting, out of earshot.

Mara could scarcely breathe, the oppression on her heart was so great. Never could she have believed that Dann and she could be in the same place, and he pretend he had not seen her. This cheerful, noisy scene – people drinking and eating, talking and lazing, all under a little ceiling of greenery and flowers – lost its charm, and all she could see were vulgar or foolish faces, and Dann, as he talked with Bergos, seemed no better.

Her heart was hurting, her eyes hurt. Why was she trying so hard to run, always running and fighting so hard for her life and for Dann's life? What for? Now she seemed absurd to herself, this little, frightened fugitive, always glancing over her shoulder, always alert for thieves, guarding Dann or, when he was not there, worrying about him. Mara looked back down her life, from the moment when she had stood up to ‘the bad one' in her parents' house, and seemed to herself like a scurrying little beetle.

And now the thought arrived in her mind, as she watched Bergos, that the person who had been organising her surveillance – had been Bergos. It was he whom she had to fear. And those who employed him. Who? Dalide? But what could she be hoping to get out of her, apart from a fee as a marriage broker?

Mara thought she would get up, deliberately and slowly, to be noticed, go to where the men sat, smile prettily at all three, talk a little, then refuse their invitation that she should sit down. Then leave. But suppose they did not invite her to sit down? She quietly rose, slipped away through a side door in the leafy screen, and walked as fast as she could to the hill, not
looking now to see who observed her. She did not care what happened to her. There were footsteps behind her. From their speed she understood how fast she was walking. Dann caught up with her, and took her arm. She shook him off and walked on. He was beside her. He did not speak until they were at the top of the low hill, where there was a big garden, or park, which on its north side had a tall fence, with guards along it.

‘Stop, Mara, let us sit down.'

There was a bench. A glance told her that here was ‘her' Dann, not
the other one,
as she now called the impostor. He was grave, affable, composed and was smiling at her. He put his hand over hers.

‘Mara. Don't go on being angry, please.'

The angry, protesting thoughts that were filling her mind faded away. ‘Who is that Mahondi?'

‘His name is Darian. He has just come from Shabis. He has news. But first …' He took from an inner pocket a coil of heavy, dull metal, beaten silver, and held it out to her. It was a bangle, but for the upper arm, not the wrist, meant to fit close. It was a serpent, and the head end was slightly raised, to strike. Mara slid it up on to her upper arm, easing it over the elbow joint, and saw how well it looked. Then she let the sleeve fall over it, the lovely sleeve with its delicate, shadowy patterns. ‘Take it off again.' Mara did so. He pressed the tail of the serpent where there was a little indentation, and a knife shot out of its mouth, a mere sliver of glittering metal. Dann pressed again and the knife slid back. ‘It's poisoned. Immediate death.' Then, because of her unease: ‘Shabis sent it to you.'

‘A loving present.'

‘Yes, Mara, it is. He said to Darian that if you had had this when the Hennes patrol captured you, you could have killed them all and escaped.'

Mara slid it back up her arm, and let the sleeve fall.

‘It's so pretty,' said Dann, stroking the sleeve, and through it, her. ‘And now, there's news, but it isn't good. After we ran away, half of the Hennes army escaped. This is what Shabis told the other three generals would happen. Our army chased their army back to the line of the watchtowers, where the Hennes made a stand. There was a terrible battle. They held their territory. Our army retreated back to our lines. So all that happened was that thousands of people got killed, soldiers and civilians too. Neanthes, Hennes and Thores civilians.'

‘So everything is exactly as it was?'

‘Yes. Stalemate.'

‘Oh no,' she said, rebellious, ‘no, nothing stays the same.'

‘But it has all been like that for years. What can change it?'

‘Drought, for one.'

‘Drought, drought … that's how we see everything, because of what we've seen. But here there isn't going to be drought. Floods are more in Bilma's line.'

And now both of them, brother and sister, he still holding her forearm, turned to look down at Bilma spread out there, gardens and houses, parks and houses, fountains everywhere. She heard his sigh. She saw his face change, and instinctively drew her arm away. He did not notice, he was looking over to where the big, pleasant houses spread on the slopes there.

‘Mara, why don't we stay here?' She shook her head, and again felt the nets of danger closing around her. ‘I want to show you something.' He pulled her up from the bench, and they walked with their backs to the town to where the tall fence dipped down the other side of the hill. The guards watched them. ‘Darian showed me this, early this morning. We came here.' Where the fence began to descend the hill, they could see through it down to where, at the foot of the hill, was a long, low building, with platforms on either side. Running north from the building were two parallel lines, close together, shining gently in the sunlight. From a platform, something that looked like a long, covered box was in the process of being pushed along the lines by a group of young men. The lines ran north, at first through light forest and then through grassland. The two stood silent, watching how the young men pushing the box laboured, their backs bent. Twenty of them, and then half ran past the box and picked up some ropes, or lines, invisible to them where they stood on the hill, and went ahead, pulling, as the ten behind pushed.

‘That is the way out of Bilma,' said Dann.

‘And who is in that – conveyance?'

‘Who do you suppose? Can't you see the guards? The rich use it. Those lines run north to the next town, Kanaz. Once there were machines that ran on their own power on lines like those.'

‘Once? Oh I suppose the usual thousands of years ago?'

‘No. Two or three hundred, they are not sure. But now slaves do the work.'

‘I didn't know there were slaves in Bilma.'

‘They aren't called slaves. Mara, Darian wants me to join him as a
labourer pushing the coaches – that is what they are called. And when we get to the next town, or the one after – run away.' And, before he said it, she knew what she would hear. ‘I'd rather die, Mara. I've done that, pushing dead machines up and down hills.'

‘And not long ago you were General Dann.' She smiled at him, meaning to tease him a little, but saw his face was dark and angry. Her Dann was not there. This Dann would not take my hand, hold my arm, so simply and nicely, out of affection for me.

‘There's something else. Kira came north with Darian. He replaced me in her affections, when I left. Well, he's been after her a long time. Darian is a deserter. So Shabis would have death squads ready for more than one of his officers.'

‘Dann, I'm sure that Shabis wouldn't … '

‘Oh, you can be so stupid, Mara. An army has rules. If they caught me I'd be for it. And so would Darian. That means, if people knew here they could get a ransom for us…That is why Darian wants to go North. There is going to be trouble between the Four Generals. Now the three are blaming Shabis for the mess in Shari. There is a lot of disaffection in the army. If the Generals could have little General Dann and Major Darian publicly executed, it would buck up discipline no end.'

He was staring down again. Another of the coaches was being pushed out of it along the lines. ‘Perhaps Kira is down there. She left Darian as soon as they got here. He was just a means of getting away. I hear she has already got another protector. So she has been here in the same town with me, but I didn't know it. Perhaps I am looking at her now.'

‘Oh, you do love her,' said Mara, but shrank, seeing his face still dark and angry.

‘That is how you would have to travel North, Mara. A protector. That's the way it's done, and I would push your coach.' He turned, and took her hands, gently. This was not
the other one.
‘I love her, yes. And you shouldn't mind that, Mara, because my heart was as small as a dried bean, before Kira. Like yours is now.' Here tears flooded Mara's eyes, thinking of her cold, aching heart. ‘But when I loved Kira so much, I knew how much I love you. I didn't know it till then. I began to remember … I know how you looked after me and defended me, Mara. And you sang to me, kept Kulik away from me … Kulik is here, I saw him.' And then, seeing her face, said, ‘I tell you, I saw him. You never believe me, do you?' And now, right in front of her was
the other one.
She felt afraid.

‘I was just little Dann. And you were a big girl. We're equal now, though. I want to stay here in Bilma. I want to buy one of those houses …' he turned himself around, pulling her with him. The great, white houses stood shining in their gardens. ‘I want to live here in a house like that.'

‘Dann, we don't have the money.'

He pressed her robe close in to her so that he could feel the cord of coins nestling there.

‘Give me your coins, Mara.'

He was gently shaking her, and then not so gently. ‘Give them to me.'

‘No. You could take them by force.'

His face was puckering and twitching, little convulsive tics near the eyes and mouth. It was as if the face of the other one was fighting to hold off the Dann she knew. His eyes were staring, and sombre, his mouth half open – the dreadful little convulsions of the flesh went on.

‘I have ten gold coins. Did you know we could buy a house with that? We could settle down – a little house, not one of those … But I know how to get more money, I know I can. And I want yours … '