Mama's Boy (22 page)

49

T
he sight of her husband sitting on the deck smoking a Cuban cigar tore at her insides. Kay knew that he only smoked his cigars when he was in deep thought and something was truly bothering him. Usually it was reserved for a case that he thought he would lose. She knew tonight it was because of her.

“Knock, knock.” Kay tapped on the door that led out to the back deck. “You up for a little company?” she said as she stuck her head out. She didn't want to get too much in his face if he wasn't ready to talk to her. It had only been a week since she'd told him the truth, but with a love like theirs, that was a lifetime.

Phillip nodded and motioned toward the seat across from him. The last time they had been on this deck together, he had been mulling a difficult case. He told her that just her presence gave him peace. Now she wondered if he'd ever feel that way again.

“I'm so sorry,” she began.

He inhaled his cigar, let the smoke linger for a moment, then released it. “I know,” he finally said.

“Will you ever be able to forgive me?”

He slowly nodded. “Yeah,” was all he said.

Relief filled her. If Phillip left her on top of everything else, Kay did not know what she would do.

“What I don't get,” he said, tapping the ash from the cigar into an ashtray, “is why you felt like you couldn't be truthful with me. I don't understand why you would be ashamed, and I don't get why you thought you couldn't tell me.”

She looked at him sideways. “Of course, I was ashamed.”

“Why? You were raped. A man you knew and trusted took advantage of you. That's nothing to be ashamed of. If anything, you could have given a voice to other young women who have gone through something similar.”

“No, I couldn't let the world know that happened.” Kay had shut down after what she considered her family's betrayal. An already delicate family situation had completely shattered. Of course, she cried at their funeral, but it wasn't the type of cry that came with a void in your heart. She had cried because they never made peace.

“I get that part,” Phillip said. “But you could have let me know.” The hurt was strong in his voice.

She didn't know how to reply because her husband was absolutely right. It was wrong of her to withhold that information. It was wrong not to trust him enough to be truthful.

“So, what now?” Kay said after a few moments of silence.

“That's what I'm trying to figure out. With everything I know, I've got to figure out what to do with this case. How can I represent Jamal? How can I work for the man that violated my wife?”

Kay weighed his words. If she were solely acting on her hatred of Elton Jones, she would have been quick to tell him that he
couldn't. But Gloria's words hit home to her. Was Jamal supposed to suffer because of the sins of his father?

“I've recused myself from this case,” Kay said. “Sam wasn't happy, but it had to be done. For me and for the appearance of any improprieties. I don't know what to tell you to do. But I've come to realize this much: This isn't about Elton. It isn't even about me. It's about Jamal, and I don't know, a part of me feels like he deserves a shot.”

That caused Phillip to do a double take. “What? Is that the hard-nosed prosecutor talking?” he said with a slight smile, a welcome sight for Kay. “Makes a difference when it's your own child, huh?” Phillip added.

Kay shrugged. She didn't know if she'd ever truly see Jamal as her child, but she remembered how despite the hate that she felt for his father, the year after she gave birth, every time she had ever thought about the baby she gave away, it was accompanied by a pang in her heart. Which is why she tried her best to push him from her memories.

“I wish I could say that I felt love or something that made me want to have a relationship with him. That I felt this bond with Jamal that was changing my perspective. But I don't and that honestly scares me. But what I do feel is everything that has happened with Ryan just caused me to see that one bad decision can truly alter the course of someone's life. Ryan is lucky that all he got was kicked out of school, but if he had been in public school, or had been caught by a police officer, he could very well be behind bars just like Jamal.”

Phillip nodded as if he was proud of her analytical thinking. “Yeah, I'm probably going to continue to represent Jamal. But I'm not even going to fake the funk. His father better not get anywhere near me.”

Kay wasn't about to argue with that.

“Does Jamal know?” Phillip asked.

“No, of course, I wouldn't tell him and I don't think Gloria has told him,” Kay replied.

He looked at Kay. “I think you should go see him and tell him.”

“What?”

“I think you should go see him. I think you should tell him that you're his mother.”

“No.” She shook her head. That had never been an option. “Some secrets are best left buried.”

“I don't know, Kay. Even when they're buried, they have a way of shifting to the top.” He looked at her one last time, then stood. “And when they catch you by surprise, they can cause irrevocable damage.”

Kay had no reply for that. Seeing Jamal and having no idea that he was her child was one thing. But how could she face him now? And as much as Kay couldn't stand Elton, he was the only father Jamal knew. Was she supposed to shatter that bond? He was dealing with enough as it was. This would only turn his world upside down even more.

As if he could read her thoughts, Phillip reached over and took her hand and pulled her up out of her seat. “You can do it. It'll be hard, but you have to do it. It's time to let go of the hate.”

She laid her head on his shoulder. Phillip was right. She'd told him. She'd told her boss and her friend. Now she needed to tell Jamal. She didn't know how she would find the strength, but she would go see Jamal and let him know that she was his biological mother.

50

G
loria had never in her life been inclined to watch a political debate. But right about now, she sat riveted to the television.

“How much longer is that going to be on?” her mother asked her. “I watch
Family Feud
every night at seven o'clock. You messing up my schedule. I don't like my routine messed up.”

Gloria sighed. There was a reason she'd left her mother's house at eighteen.

“Okay, Mama. You know normally I leave you alone. But can you please let me watch this?” If Gloria had been thinking, she would've brought Jamal's small TV to watch while she was staying with her mother since Erma only had one TV.

Erma walked over and stood next to Gloria. She turned her nose up. “Why do you want to watch that mess anyway? Vote for the black girl,” Erma said. “There, you don't need to watch a debate. Decision made.”

Gloria side-eyed her mother. She didn't want to hear a lecture. Her mother knew they'd adopted Jamal and quiet as it had been
kept, Gloria nonetheless suspected Erma even knew he was Elton's biological child, because she often made quips about how much alike Jamal and Elton looked.

“You know you sound crazy, right?” Gloria couldn't help but say. “I mean, in this case, the black woman is the better-qualified one. But you don't vote for people just because of the color of their skin.”

Erma raised an eyebrow at her. “
You
don't vote for people because of the color of their skin. I do. I'm always putting my money on black. Look at that man. He's got beady eyes.”

“Okay, Mother. Whatever you say.”

“That's because whatever I say is right.” Erma folded her arms in irritation. “You need to hurry up. I don't like to miss my show since Steve Harvey took over.”

Gloria didn't want her mother hovering over her, nagging her while she was trying to watch the debate. “I have an idea,” Gloria said. “Why don't you go take your bath and I should be done watching by the time you finish?” She just wanted her mother to go away so that she could watch the debate in peace. It had already started. Gloria had never seen Kay in her element, but she seemed like a natural fit. Like she wasn't intimidated by the big cowboy-looking man and his condescending tone.

“Fine, but when I come out, that TV is going to
Family Feud,
” Erma huffed.

Gloria didn't bother responding. She just turned the TV up as her mother stomped out of the room.

The moderator asked a few questions about the state of the city and just when the debate was about to lose Gloria's interest, she heard Marty Simon say, “Well, this has been a very competitive
race. But I do believe there is something Kay Christiansen would like to tell the great people of Houston.” He turned to Kay and she just stood there looking like she had lost her voice.

“Isn't there, Mrs. Christiansen?” he repeated when she didn't reply. He had a big cheesy grin on his face. “Or would you rather I tell it?”

When Kay didn't say anything the moderator jumped in. “We would like to know what you two are talking about.”

That stupid grin grew wider. “We're talking about being trustworthy,” Marty announced. “The person you pick to lead this beautiful metropolis needs to be somebody you can trust,” he said like he knew a big secret.

Gloria drew a breath as she felt the volcano about to erupt.

“Are you trying to say we can't trust Mrs. Christiansen?” the moderator asked.

Kay finally spoke up. “I think my record reflects—”

Marty let out a big laugh before interrupting her. “Please, let's not talk about something being a reflection of.” He turned back to the moderator. “Because, Gail, if you want to know the truth, you're not gonna get it from this lady.” He looked at Kay one last time. “You still plan on staying in the race, right?” he asked.

Gail and several other people in the room looked confused.

Kay looked like she was clenching the podium to keep her balance. But she finally spoke, although some of the confidence was gone from her voice. “I will repeat myself. I have no intentions of dropping out of the race for mayor. I think the people of Houston deserve someone fair and who has the best interest of this beautiful city at heart, not the interests of select groups.”

“Awww, that's so sweet,” Marty said. “And such a load of crap.”
He shook his head at her. “Well, it's your funeral.” This time Marty turned his attention to the camera pointed in his direction. “My opponent is right that the people of Houston deserve fairness, and commitment, and might I add honesty. And when you talk about honesty and trustworthiness, you want someone that's going to do what they say they're going to do when they say they're going to do it. You want people that know you are about your word. You want people with core family values, not people that have illegitimate children and who toss them aside.”

Gloria's heart broke at the pain on Kay's face. The moderator looked at Kay, then back at Marty. “Would you care to elaborate?”

He smirked as he looked over at Kay. “Maybe Mrs. Christiansen would,” he said with a chuckle.

Kay's eyes glistened as if she was trying desperately not to cry. She could see Loni off to the side about to have a stroke.

“What Mr. Simon is alluding to,” Kay began, “what he has been threatening me with, is something that he learned while paying my assistant to spy on me, then using that information to blackmail me to drop out of the race.”

That wiped the smile right off his face.

Kay took a deep breath and composed herself, the pain she felt resonating through the screen.

“I have never told anyone this until recently and it is something I would've rather kept to myself, as I'm sure anyone out there understands who has endured a personal tragedy. But since I am refusing to drop out of the race, Marty Simon is about to tell you in hopes that you'll turn against me and he'll win the mayoral race.” The arena hall was deathly silent as she continued. “As a teenager, I was raped. That resulted in a child, which I gave up for
adoption. It's a personal matter that Mr. Simon now wants to take public.”

Not to be outdone, Marty added, “Well, I wanted to take it public because what Mrs. Christiansen is failing to tell the American public is that her son is the one that shot that police office in Jasper and I felt like the people had a right to know.”

The room erupted in chatter. Photographers and other media personnel began scrambling. Marty seized the moment, raising his voice.

“I mean, she was going to prosecute this hoodlum, probably tricking the people into believing she was working for justice and then throwing the case so that a cop killer walked free!”

Gloria wanted to come through that TV and hurt Marty Simon. He was just another person using her son to further his own cause.

“Oh, my. Is this true?” the moderator asked.

Kay inhaled. “It is, at least the part about Jamal Jones being the son I gave up for adoption. But I didn't find out until recently, which is why I stepped down as prosecutor in the case.”

“So, you're no longer the prosecutor?”

“No, I'm not.”

Marty pounded his podium as if he was trying to quiet the noise in the arena. “My point is if you can't trust her to be open and honest—”

Kay cut him off. “Gail, I am here to discuss all that I can bring to the city, not rehash a painful part of my past. If the people want someone that's perfect, who has never sinned, who has no flaws, then yes, they may want to vote for Marty Simon, if Jesus isn't on the ballot.” Several people chuckled at that. Marty didn't find anything funny. “I'm not perfect,” Kay continued. “I never claimed
to be. That was a personal tragedy that has recently reared its ugly head and I'm dealing with it as best I see fit. But it has no bearing on who I am now and what I can bring to the city of Houston.”

Marty looked frazzled, like he was upset that his announcement hadn't gone quite like he planned.

Gloria leaned back in her seat as the moderator struggled to regain control of the debate. Now the world knew that her husband was a rapist. They hadn't made his name public yet, but Gloria had no doubt that soon they would. But she no longer cared what that revelation would do to Elton. She was worried about what it was going to do to her son.

Erma reappeared in the doorway, her silk kimono wrapped around her petite frame. “I hope that debate show is over, because I'm 'bout to watch
Family Feud
.”

This time, Gloria was glad to see Erma snatch up the remote and change the channel.