Read Make A Wish (Dandelion #1) Online
Authors: Jenna Lynn Hodge
“Oh no… Do I wanna hear this?” Saylor asked. She looked las if she was contemplating covering her ears.
“The lab tech who took my blood in the hospital when we went to the ER.”
“NO!” Her expression took on a look of confusion, giving me the perfect opportunity to continue.
“Yeah and guess who the lab tech from the hospital is?”
“Oh no… Who?” Saylor wasn’t liking where this conversation was headed, that much was clear.
“M-max.”
“Max, as in
the
Max? The one from when you were a kid?”
I nodded, memories of the pain I’d gone through coming to the forefront of my mind. I was so tired of crying.
“Oh, I’ll kill him.” She stood and started stretching her legs, preparing to go after him.
My sweet friend.
“Don’t… Please. I just want this all to be over with,” I pleaded. “He isn’t in there anyways. Not to mention, now I have to deal with the whole Beau thing, so thanks for that,” I hissed. “I wasn’t ready to deal with him and now he knows. I mean, I’m fat,” I pouted, not caring for a second that I sounded like a baby.
“Oh sweetie, you are the most gorgeous pregnant girl ever, though you will definitely need your hair done. Maybe makeup too, to cover the bruises.” Saylor ran her finger over the splotches on my face. “ And don’t get me started on your belly. You have the perfect baby bump, so cute and small. It looks more like you had two really big meals back to back.” She winked and I couldn’t help but laugh. This moment was one that I’d cherish forever.
GRIFFIN
A police cruiser had shown up and loaded the wimpy kidnapper into the back. Beau talked to the cops for a while and had convinced them to talk with Juliette another day, giving her the chance to rest and recoup.
“She’s sure something, Boss.” I smiled, walking up beside Beau, who was watching the girls laughing and crying, as he leaned against the pack vehicle. “I like her spirit.”
“I don’t remember her being like that. The girl I knew wasn’t angry or violent.”
“When people go through experiences like that, it changes them. Juliette not only had to look after herself but also her unborn child. There’s no saying what she had to go through,” I reasoned, knowing full well I was making an extremely valid point.
“She looks pretty roughed up, doesn’t she?”
“That she does.”
“You know, I didn’t know she was pregnant. Saylor never let me in on that fact.”
“If you don’t mind me saying, Boss, perhaps it wasn’t her place to tell and maybe the child doesn’t belong to you.” I knew that the baby did, but I had promised Saylor that I wouldn’t tell Beau, and I damned well was going to keep that promise.
“I need to talk to her.”
“Oui patron, vous le faites. Mais lui donner le temps de se reposer en premier.”
“I intend to give her time to rest first, Griff. What am I, an animal?” I arched my eyebrow at him. “Don’t answer that,” Beau said in amusement before turning to face the girl whom he’d spent so much time searching for.
“Wish me luck.”
“Bon chance.” I winked and turned, walking up to Saylor and asking her for a moment of her time.
“Smooth,” she whispered in my ear while I pulled her off to the side, leaving Juliette and Beau together—alone.
“I know.” I smiled my goofy grin at her, which only managed to make her giggle.
BEAU
“Can we talk?” I asked hesitantly. Looking at Juliette was making me even more nervous. Her eyes were cold.
“Why?”
“You aren’t gonna make this easy on me, are you?” I sighed, rubbing my hand through my long hair.
“Why should I, Beau?”
“Okay, I totally deserve that.” I cringed and Juliette softened her demeanor momentarily.
“Fine. We can talk. But I need to eat and take a shower first… I’m so gross.” Her face scrunched up as she looked down at her messy clothes. “Okay?”
“Sure.” I reached down and helped her up into the vehicle. Everyone piled inside. The nightmare was finally over.
“Ughh… That was so good!” Juliette lay back on the bed rubbing her now full stomach—after eating a big juicy cheeseburgers and fries. It was cute watching her excitement as she bit into each bite. “I missed real food.” She turned her head and smiled at Saylor, who couldn’t help but laugh.
“I’m usually the fat one who can’t get enough food. Now look at you.” She giggled some more.
“Psht… Shut your face. I’m eating for two over here.” Jules winked and sat up, peeking over at me. That was the first time she’d addressed the wolf in the room—so to speak—since we’d left the house she’d been kept locked up in.
I tried to do the math in my head, trying to figure out if the kid she’s pregnant with was mine but I just didn’t know. I’ve never really been around many pregnant women, so I couldn’t even guess how far along she was by looking at her.
If it was mine, there wasn’t a doubt I’d be excited— nervous and surprised, but excited nonetheless.
Juliette looked at Saylor, a small flicker of pain flashing through her eyes before disappearing. Some unspoken understanding flowed between them and Saylor nodded, rising to her feet.
“Well, I’ll be outside with my good headphones on. Don’t mind me. Good luck you two and try not to kill each other.” She smirked as she grabbed her phone from the counter and walked to the door.
“I’d never hurt her.”
“Too late,” I heard Juliette mumble quietly to herself and it nearly broke my heart.
The door quietly closed behind Saylor, leaving us to sit in a death-like silence, almost as if it was a game to see who’d break first.
“I never should have left you after the night we shared. It wasn’t like me to do that and I’m truly sorry.” I hung my head feeling so much shame for my actions. I was just at a loss for words on how to explain myself. She couldn’t know the truth—she’s human.
“I forgive you.” They were three small words that I hadn’t been expecting her to say to me. I was prepared for yelling, crying, anything but that.
"The one thing worse than a person hating you, is you yourself hating you. I know that more than anyone; and nobody—not even you, Beau—deserves that. I forgive you, but I’m not ready to trust. I can’t. Not yet.”
I wanted to mention the baby, to hear for once and for all whether the child was mine, but I was also afraid of what I’d hear. If it wasn’t, then that meant she had moved on with someone else and I wasn’t sure my heart could fathom that.
“Do you know why I was angry with you?” I didn’t speak but shook my head ‘no’. “Even now, I struggle with how I’m feeling about everything that happened between us. I tell you, these damn hormones aren’t helping.” She half-smiled at me before continuing. “When I woke up and you weren’t there, it was almost like a reassurance that I wasn’t worth it. Growing up in the group home, it was a really difficult environment for a shy, awkward kid like me to be in. I was constantly being told I’m worthless, that I’d never amount to anything. And because that’s all I’d heard, I believed it.”
I felt nothing but shame and guilt. Though I had expected to hear about how much I’d hurt her, I didn’t expect it to hurt so much to hear. I deserved every second.
She stood and walked over to me—gently easing herself down onto the empty seat beside me.
“Beau, look at me.” She put her hand below my chin and turned my head, so she could look me in the eyes. “I’m not saying this stuff to hurt you, but it wouldn’t be fair to only give half versions of the truth.”
I smiled slightly and nodded, urging her to go on.
“Sometimes, I still believe that I’m not worth it, and finding out you were gone was one of those times. You leaving forced me to re-evaluate everything, as silly as that may seem. I spent months pouring over every memory and experience I’d gone through. It’s hard for me to admit this, but it isn’t easy being me and sometimes I make it a lot harder on myself than I should. I hit a brand new low, one that surpasses any from my past. I gave up on life. I gave up on happiness. I gave in to the urge to end my life. To me,
I
wasn’t worth it.”
Silent tears slipped down her face, and with a quick brush of her small delicate fingers they were gone.
“Just days after I swallowed the bottle of pills, Saylor forced me to go to the ER. I thought she was ridiculous for making me go, I was convinced that I’d thrown up every single one I’d taken. But you’ve met Say, she’s crazy and hardheaded, she wouldn’t take no for an answer. I’m glad she didn’t either. They did a blood test on me and discovered that I was pregnant. A couple days later, I had my first ultrasound and learned that I was just over six weeks along. From the moment I found out about him or her—” she looked down and placed her hand above her swollen abdomen, “—I wanted to tell the baby’s father. He was all I could think about every time I thought about the child growing inside of me. Saylor and I even got into this ridiculous argument about it. Then before I could do the right thing and tell him in person, I got kidnapped.”
He?.. She didn’t say you,
I thought to myself.
The baby
isn’t
mine.
Juliette looked into my eyes in pain and I knew I had to think thoroughly and gather all my thoughts before responding. I knew I couldn’t be mad that she had moved on, but it didn’t lessen the blow that I’d felt.
“Being chained in that tiny room gave me all the time in the world to sit and think about my situation. Every day as my body changed, I thought about him—”
God. Is she trying to torture me?
“—What I would say to him when I got out, whether he’d even want to be in our baby’s life, whether I even wanted him to. I thought I had it all figured out, and then the unexpected happened and I felt my heart get crushed all over again at the mere sight of him. The father of my child saved us. We wouldn’t be here without you, Beau.”
What?
Another tear escaped and fell down Juliette’s bruised cheek. I couldn’t take my eyes from her as I processed everything. The realization came like a freight train, loud and clear.
The baby she was carrying
was
mine.
“M-my child?”
She nodded and reached for my hand, bringing it to her small protruding belly. I could feel little movements from within and I wasn’t sure whether to shout at the rooftops with joy, or cry. My heart swelled with love for my unborn child.
“I know you never asked for any of this, so I’m going to give you time to think about if this is something you even want. If you don’t, I understand and promise I won’t hold it against you. But if you do want this, I promise I will try my hardest to be a good mom to our baby. Just please don’t... don’t take...” She choked back sobs, trying her hardest to breathe.
My day had taken a turn for the weird since the moment I’d finally found her and each moment since then had quite literally taken my breath away. As I held my hand to her stomach, feeling my very own baby moving around inside her, I saw something in her eyes I knew all too well—fear.
It took me a few moments to register what she had said.
“But if you do want this, I promise I will try my hardest to be a good mom to our baby, just please don’t... don’t take...”
Then it all of a sudden made sense. I pulled my hand away from her and stood up.
“Is that really what you think of me?” I always dreamed that when the time came for me to be a father, it’d be the greatest day of my life. I never expected this.
“What?” she asked, clearly surprised at my sudden anger.
“That I’d just take our kid away from you, not caring about how you’d feel?”
Jules looked down before mumbling. “We don’t know each other Beau, not really. It was only one night and I tried to kill myself. If I were you, that’s what I would do. Take the child away from the mentally unstable parent. But I’m not you and I regret every day doing that. I will be a good mom, I promise I will.” Her voice was vulnerable and it only made me want to pull her into my arms and reassure her that I’d never rip our child away from her, but I couldn’t do that. I needed time to sort out what I was feeling and stew over the news that I just learned.
I turned away from her, walking to the front door and slamming it behind me, leaving Juliette in the silence of Saylor’s apartment. Alone.
JULIETTE
Saylor popped her head in. “What the hell just happened? I’ve never seen him so pissed before and I’ve spent the past few weeks hanging with the guy.”
“I told him about the baby being his and kinda, sorta, maybe implied he might take the baby away from me.” I couldn’t help but cringe when I realized how harsh it actually sounded.
“What the hell don’t you understand about ‘Play nice’? Dammit, Jules, I love you but that is beyond screwed up.”
Saylor being disappointed in me was a new feeling, and I didn’t like it one bit. I’ve experienced worried, crazy, pissed, and obnoxious Saylor but never disappointed.
“I’m such an idiot.” I laid my head back and placed my hands over my eyes, begging the recent headache to go away.
“Yeah, you sure the hell are. Beau has spent the last couple weeks, since the moment he found out you were missing, searching for you after only spending
one
measly night together? He even had his family involved. That guy loves you, Jules. Yeah, he screwed up, but it’s so obvious that he’s trying to make it up to you. Cut the guy some slack, already.”
“I tried to
kill
myself while I was pregnant with our child, Say. I can’t just forget that.”
“Yeah, Jules.
YOU
tried to kill yourself, not Beau. It’s not completely his fault, it’s yours too.”
“Why are you defending him?” I asked. My feelings were suddenly hurt. I felt as if Saylor was betraying me and our friendship.
“Because I saw that man give up everything to fight for you, and even though he didn’t know it at the time, he was fighting for your child too. You don’t have to marry the poor guy, but dammit Juliette, grow up.” Saylor’s voice hitched out of frustration.
She never used my first name, always just referring to me as Jules, Jay, or the Cyborg. I knew I’d messed up and now, now I had to make it up to him somehow.
I stood up, grabbed Saylor’s car keys, and walked out in search of the man whom I hadn’t intended to hurt with my words but had anyways.
***
I sat on the stairs outside Beau’s house, squeezing my cable knit sweater tightly around me to keep myself warm while I waited for him to arrive. The later it got, the colder it became.
I’d been sitting outside for well over an hour, but he still hadn’t come home. I owed it to Beau and to our baby to wait it out, so I refused to leave until we talked. Luckily I didn’t have to wait too much longer before his truck came roaring into the driveway. He climbed out of the truck, his face expressionless as he walked up to me. I couldn’t help the shiver that went through me, partially from the cold and partially from how handsome he looked.
“Damn, Jules. How long have you been waiting?”
“An hour and a half, maybe longer. I lost track of time actually.” Beau eased me to my feet, rubbing my arms to get the heat circulating. “Thanks.” I smiled at him, my heart already melting just looking at him. But I couldn’t crumble so easily, I knew that.