Mail Order Mishap: Christian Romance (Kansas Brides Book 1) (12 page)

Garrett laid in bed that night, knowing for certain that if he was going to make any sort of move, it had to be made soon—but what, and how? He asked himself a question he had a hard time answering: if he'd have known that night in bed with Amber what he knew now, would he have stopped when he had?

After thinking about each aspect of the situation he knew he’d done the right thing, after all. As far as he knew, he now had two choices: to act, or to forget.

He decided to act.

It was dusk, and Garrett had just gotten home from the livery, where the night foreman had taken over until dawn. He washed, put on a clean shirt and pants, shined his boots, and left his apartment. He walked deliberately across the street to the Smith house. He knocked, and as usual, Mrs. Smith answered.

“I’d like to see Amber,” he said. When she grimaced, he added, “I have to keep trying.”

Edna sighed. “I’ll ask her,” she said with a smile.

While she was gone, Garrett prayed like never before. When he looked up, Amber was standing on the other side of the screen door.

“You wanted to see me?” she asked.

Her eyes looked greener, her face, more beautiful than ever, and his heart almost beat itself out of his chest.

“I do. Please, at least talk with me.”

“I think we’ve already covered everything, Garrett.”

“I’m sorry. I’ve never been so sorry for anything in my life. Please, forgive me.”

“Oh, I’ve forgiven you,” she said with a slight smirk. “I just don’t want a thing more to do with you or your brother. How could I ever trust either of you again?”

“I love you, Amber,” he said. “I don’t want you to go back to Virginia. If you don’t want a thing to do with me, that’s fine, but please don’t leave. At least your presence here, in town, gives me the illusion of being close to you.”

Garrett thought he saw a flicker of softness momentarily appear on Amber’s face when he said that, but then her stern look returned.

“I haven’t decided yet what I’ll do,” she said.

Garrett nodded and started to turn away, but then turned back and said, “If you stay, I promise I won’t bother you or try to talk to you again if that’s what you want. But if you should change your mind, I can be found at the livery. I wish you well.” He then walked down the steps and back across the street.

Chapter 14

Amber watched Garrett walk across the street and into his building. She continued to stare out the door, even though Garrett was long inside his house. She even watched as he lit his lamp, and she saw him walk across the room before he pulled down his shade.

For the next few days, she noted the shade in the window of Garrett’s apartment remained pulled down, which meant he'd given up watching out for her, and she felt disappointed, in a way. It had felt good to know he'd still been vigilantly watching out for her.

She hadn’t given Forrest an answer when he’d asked if he could court her. She’d told him she wasn’t sure she’d be staying in Hunter’s Grove, and that if she decided to stay, she’d let him know. His kiss was light and quick and hadn’t fazed her one bit. Now, if that had been Garrett—she stopped her thoughts and reprimanded herself.

She tried her best not to think of that night when she’d almost let Garrett have his way with her—she stopped and corrected her thinking—the night
she'd
encouraged him into having his way with her‒it wasn't fair to lay the full blame for that on him. Why was she suddenly making excuses for him? He shouldn’t have been in her room, to begin with. She shook off all thoughts of Garrett and tried to think about whether to stay in Hunter’s Grove or return to Virginia. Why did her mind keep coming back to Garrett?

Should she stay and allow Forrest to court her? He was rich, a Christian, and seemed a decent, if not a bit egotistical, man. If she stayed, she’d always risk the chance of running into Garrett or Charles—she especially didn’t want to run into Charles. Yet, she'd made friends there, and felt at home.

Amber had to admit one thing to herself‒she still felt something for Garrett. She felt it when she'd spoken to him through the screened door. She'd felt it when she watched him walk away. If she just could separate the good times with him and black out his dishonesty…

He’d come to her rescue more than once, he was tender, understanding, and his kisses drove her to act like a wanton. Goosebumps formed on her arms as she remembered his kisses and she sighed. If only she could trust him again.

Edna had mentioned that he was now a partner with the owner of the livery, and she was happy for him, but now she needed to put Garrett Turner out of her mind and decide what she should do next. Should she leave, or should she stay in Hunter’s Grove?

She walked out to Edna's backyard, her favorite place to think. It was fenced in, so she felt safe; it was full of lovely flowers; and there was a comfortable swing hanging from a huge oak tree by sturdy ropes. Usually, Amber went there each night after dinner, because the sun set opposite the swing. The backyard also had the privacy that the front porch lacked.

Garrett brought up the subject of changing his name from Turner to Johnson with Cole and his father. Howard liked the idea, and it even brought tears to his eyes, but Cole worried about what people would say, and how it might make Charles feel.

“Do you really want people to know your mother slept with Sam out of wedlock? Other than that, I think it’s a great idea,” Cole said.

“When I think of Elmer killing my father, I’m ashamed to carry his name. It might be worth the embarrassment, and my mother isn’t here to feel the shame. I don’t think Charles would mind‒he’d still be my half-brother.”

“It might taint your mother’s memory,” Cole said.

“I suppose you’re right.” Garrett dropped the subject, and they talked about the business.

Howard seemed weaker and spoke less when Garrett visited him, but he always held onto Garrett’s hand and smiled at him.

Several days after renting the luxury buggy to the man who'd taken Amber to dinner, the man came in again asking for the best buggy they had.

“I’m sorry, sir. Someone else has already rented that one,” Garrett said.

“Sorry to hear that,” the man said. “Is your second-best buggy free, then?”

“Actually, this has been a busy week for us, and we only have one buggy left.” Garrett pointed to an old, rickety buggy, with a dent in the cab.

“I can hardly court a woman in that!” he exclaimed. “Is there another livery in town?”

“No, we're the only one.” Garrett started to walk away when the man called him back.

“I see a better one over there,” he pointed. “Can’t I have that one?”

“Sorry, it’s been reserved,” Garrett said, already silently praying for forgiveness for his false witness.

“Would it be possible for me to reserve the one I had the last time for another day, then?” the man asked.

This man didn’t give up. Garrett couldn’t lie any longer. He felt too guilty. “You could.”

“How about for Saturday night?”

“Fine, but the rates go up on the weekends.”

“I don’t mind. I‘d like the same horse, as well.”

“Reservations must be paid in advance,” Garrett said.

The man was only slightly taken aback when Garrett gave him the doubled price, which he paid before taking his leave.

Garrett felt depressed knowing that the man would most likely be taking Amber out to lover’s lane, and probably kiss her again, and he punched the wall on his way to the office.

He felt helpless, but there was nothing more he could do about it. Yes, there was—he could pray. Did God answer prayers about love? Could he soften Amber’s heart toward him? He wasn’t sure if God responded to romantic pleas, but what did he have to lose?

Just when Garrett thought his life couldn’t possibly get any worse, it did. Howard peacefully passed away. Cole broke the news to him when he stepped into the livery that morning.

A quiet funeral was held for Howard. Many of the townspeople came to the wake and funeral, but no one questioned why Garrett was there, since he and Cole had always been close friends. Garrett wished he’d have had more time to spend with his Uncle.

While at the cemetery, Cole showed him his Alma’s grave to the right of Howard’s grave. On the left was Sam’s grave. Garrett took a rose from the flowers on Howard’s grave and laid it on his father’s grave. Garrett’s mother was buried a few rows away.

Garrett left work and walked to his apartment. He climbed the stairs and plopped down on his sofa. He’d hired a lady from church to clean his place and do his laundry. He hadn’t found anyone to cook for him yet, so he usually ate in town, or just bought something light at the market.

He opened up a can of beans and spooned it into his mouth right from the can. He walked to the window while he ate, tempted to raise the shade, but no, he wouldn't look at the Smith house again. He was done moping around. He’d fallen on his knees that very morning and put the matter into God’s hands. If he were meant to be with Amber, it would somehow come about. The Bible said to not worry, and to leave your troubles with Him, and that's what he'd do. He tossed the empty bean can into the trash and walked to the bedroom.

He got up before dawn each day, so he usually went to bed early. He started to unbutton his shirt when he heard a knock on his door. He walked to the sitting room and opened the door to see Charles standing there.

“Hey, brother. I know you turn in early, so I won’t keep you. I just wanted to know how you were doing,” Charles said.

“I’m alive.”

“Have you seen Amber?”

“Yes, I went over there, and she told me she wanted no part of either of us, so I left, and closed that chapter of the book,” Garrett said. “How are the hotel renovations coming along?”

“Fine, we’ve set a date for the grand opening for the fifteen of next month. Are you sure there isn’t something I can do? You seem so—so unlike yourself. You used to go to the saloons and have a good time, and were always in such a cheerful mood. I’m guessing you aren’t doing that anymore, but maybe you should,” Charles said.

“No, if I ever make love to a woman again, she’ll have my wedding ring on her finger, even though I don’t see that happening anytime soon.”

“You’ll get over her, but you have to go out and try meeting someone else. A future wife isn’t going to come knocking on your door, looking for you.”

“I know that, Charles. I just need time to get Amber out of my system.”

“How'd she get into your system in the first place? Nothing happened that night, right?”

“We didn’t make love, if that's what you mean, ” Garrett said.

“Then how could you fall in love with her?”

“It started before that. I saw her weeping a few times because she was lonely, and my heart went out to her. I knew that night, when I took her into my arms and kissed her. I’ve been with enough women in my short lifetime to know the difference. I fell in love, and that’s why I couldn’t do what I’d—what we’d planned. I had another reason, too, but that’s all I’m saying.”

Charles moved toward the door. “I’m so sorry.”

Garrett knew he was truly sorry, he could tell he was by his tone of voice and his demeanor, and he waved it off. “It was as much my fault as yours," he said. "Forget it.”

“Thank you, again, for loaning me the money to finish the renovations.”

“You’re welcome, Charles.”

That night, after praying, he made a resolution with himself and God that he wouldn't let the situation with Amber get him down. He’d keep living, and he’d enjoy life again, and let God take control.

Strangely, something Reverend Flannery had said a few weeks ago in one of his sermons spoke to him loudly. He’d said, “Sometimes you have to be down in order to look up.” That was so true. He hardly ever thought about God when he was partying with women and doing things he shouldn’t. He’d always gone to church, but he never wanted to get too close to God, for then he’d have to give up his fun, and he wasn’t ready to give it up. Now that he was down, and his life seemed hopeless, he did look up. Now he realized how wonderful God was to even listen to his prayers and forgive him after he’d so consciously ignored Him and His word in the past.

He shivered to think whether or not he’d have gone to heaven had he died before he came to his senses and moved closer to God. He made a promise that he’d never again let his life disappoint God.

Several days after making his resolution he once again began to whistle while he worked. He took Charles out for dinner one night, and his whole attitude changed. He often stopped what he was doing during the day and whispered upward, “Do with me what you will, Lord. You lead, and I’ll follow.”

Edna told Amber that Forrest was there to see her. Amber went to the sitting room and found him waiting for her. He stood when she entered.

“I was hoping to catch you at home,” he said.

“It’s nice to see you again,” she said.

“I came to ask if you’d like to go to dinner on Saturday.”

Amber was afraid to go with him. She knew he’d expect another kiss, or maybe he’d pressure her to let him court her. It wasn’t that she didn’t like him‒he was a perfect gentleman, but she didn’t feel anything special toward him, and to agree to dine with him would be the same as leading him on.