Mad About the Hatter (16 page)

“I’ll come, sire.” Alice put her hand on the Red King’s shoulder. Her smile was tremulous, but she held her head high.

“No, Alice. You have children now. Your responsibility lies with them and your husband.” Leonard patted her hand, and looked at Henry. “How about you, Henry? You’ve seen Wonderland. Will you help me save it?”

Go back? He’d just made a journey he wasn’t sure he’d survive to get home, and Leonard wanted him to go back?

Then again, there were parts of Wonderland that were beautiful, and even the scary parts held a certain uniqueness that should be preserved.

In addition, if he didn’t go back he’d probably never see Hatter again. That thought made him feel a bit sick to his stomach, although he wasn’t sure why it should. He didn’t much like Hatter, did he?

The memory of their kiss filled his mind, along with the taste of Hatter on his tongue. Oh, that kiss, that miserable, awful, wonderfully astonishing kiss! Would it haunt him forever?

There was only one way to find out.

“Yes,” Henry said. He felt Hatter squeeze his hand. “I’ll come and help.” He turned toward Hatter and saw a smile on Hatter’s face that seared Henry to his toes. He returned it with one of his own.

He didn’t see Alice and Leonard exchange a knowing glance, but heard Leonard say, “Excellent. We’ll leave in the morning.”

“In the morning,” Hatter said. “Back to Wonderland we go.”

In the morning,
Henry thought.
Which means we have all night here
. He didn’t question why the thought of spending time with Hatter in his own world made him happy, but it did.

H
ENRY
BROUGHT
Hatter downtown, where Hatter continually marveled at everything he saw—once he’d conquered his fear, that is.

When they first left Alice’s house, the street was quiet, but when they reached the main thoroughfare, traffic was much heavier. Hatter clutched Henry’s arm, his dark eyes wide and round. “What manner of beasts are those? My God, look!” He pointed to a bright yellow school bus. That one’s eaten dozens of children!” His expression was still fearful, and he kept eyeing the vehicles in the street as if one might jump the curb and swallow him up. “Oh, the horror!”

“Relax, Hatter. That’s just a bus. These are cars, trucks, and taxis. They’re machines, not animals. Sort of like carriages. People drive them and ride in them to get around faster. They run on a combustion engine, and are fueled by gasoline, although some are hybrids, and use a combination of electricity and gas.”

Hatter blinked at him, obviously completely lost. “Gasoline? Is that anything like a trampoline? Tweedledee and Tweedledum had one of those. I remember the sound it made. Boingy, boingy, boingy.”

“No, it isn’t the same at all. Gasoline is made from oil, which is a fossil fuel.”

“Where do the fossils go when they’re fueled?”

“No, no. You don’t understand. The fossils don’t go anywhere.”

“Then why fuel them? Isn’t that a waste?”

Henry blew out a breath, exasperated. “Never mind. Just understand that they won’t hurt you as long as you don’t jump out in front of them. If one hits you, it could kill you.”

“Ah. Is that how they ate all those people? They run their prey down, and then devour it? How ghastly.”

Henry slapped a hand on top of his head as if to keep the headache he was developing from escaping the confines of his skull, and decided to leave the explanations for later. It was too frustrating. He wondered if he’d appeared half as dense when he showed up in Wonderland, and smiled a sheepish grin when he admitted to himself that he’d probably been even worse. “If you trust me, I promise nothing here will hurt you.”

Hatter looked long and hard at Henry, then smiled and nodded, and seemed to relax. His curiosity was endless, though, as were his questions. At least, it seemed that way to Henry.

He insisted the skyscrapers, soaring forty or more stories above the street, had to be the work of giants. Henry tried patiently to explain about architects, construction crews, and the gigantic cranes used to construct the buildings, but he could tell Hatter didn’t quite believe him.

“Do you seriously wish me to believe that men the size of you and me made that?” Hatter asked, pointing to one of the tallest buildings in town.

“Yes.”

“Pshaw. You’re pulling my elbow.”

“The expression is ‘pulling my leg,’ and I’m not.”

Hatter folded his arms and looked at Henry askance. “How could you pull my leg? I’m standing on it.”

Henry laughed, and tugged on Hatter’s jacket, leading him toward another building. “Come on. You’ll enjoy this.”

He bought two tickets at the kiosk, and led Hatter into the theater. Although it was warm outside, the cool air inside hit them both in the face when they entered the movie house. “Air conditioning,” Henry explained.

“Conditioned air? Incredible.” Hatter moved his fingers through the air, as if to feel it. “It feels the same as Wonderland air, but it’s as cold as the peaks of the Confection Mountains even though it’s quite warm outside! Amazing.”

Henry bought them a bag of popcorn—which, after tasting, Hatter immediately dubbed the most perfect food in the world—and led him to the screening room listed on their tickets. They chose two center seats in a row halfway up the aisle. In front of them, the gigantic white screen was blank.

“This is an odd eating establishment,” Hatter remarked. He removed his hat and placed it on his knee before stuffing another handful of popcorn into his mouth. “It would be much better if we were facing one another, wouldn’t it?”

“This isn’t a restaurant, Hatter. Just watch the screen.”

The lights dimmed, and the coming attractions began. The instant the images appeared on the screen, Hatter let out a screech and jumped up. “Giants!” He pointed to the screen. “Run, Henry!”

Around them, people shushed him, and told him to sit down.

Henry chuckled and pulled Hatter back to his seat. “Shh! They’re not giants. It’s only moving pictures of people projected on a screen.”

Hatter looked doubtful. “P-pictures? You mean they aren’t real?”

“Nope. It’s all a show. Like a play. They have those in Wonderland, don’t they?”

“We have troupes of traveling players, yes. They go from town to town performing great works, like
Ode to a Jubjub Bird,
and
Oh, Jabberwock, I Hardly Knew Ye.”

“This is like them. Think of them as paintings that can move and speak. I promise they can’t hurt you.”

Squirming a little in his seat, Hatter fiddled with the brim of his top hat, and refused to make eye contact with Henry. “I-I knew that.”

“Of course you did.” Henry grinned at him and offered him more popcorn.

Crunching loudly, Hatter seemed to relax, and was soon caught up in what he later proclaimed “a marvelous history of magic and mechanical mayhem fought in the skies far beyond the sight of mere mortals.”

“You do know it’s just a movie, right?” Henry tossed the empty popcorn container into the trash on the way out of the theater. “
Star Wars
has been around since before I was born. It’s a classic.”

“You mean it’s a fable, such as those told by traveling storytellers in Wonderland?”

“Yup. Exactly.”

“It all looked so real! It seems your world is also a place of wonders, Henry.”

“I suppose so. I never thought of it that way before. I grew up with things like skyscrapers, cars, and movies. I never thought of them as anything but ordinary before.”

“Just as I never thought of tree sharks or giants as being anything but normal parts of my world, until you came along.”

“You’ve got a point.” Henry laughed and led Hatter out of the theater. As they strolled down the block, Hatter suddenly froze and pointed across the street toward a small, white fast food restaurant.

It was a White Castle.

“Is that… no, it can’t be. It’s much too small!”

Henry patted Hatter’s shoulder. “Wrong White Castle. This one just serves burgers.”

“Oh? What does it serve to the burgers? And what, exactly
are
burgers? Why does this castle serve only them? Are these burgers some sort of royalty?”

“No, burgers are food, and White Castle serves them to people.”

Hatter shook his head. “I don’t believe I’ll ever understand your world, Henry.”

“I live here, and I don’t always understand it.” Henry smiled. “Speaking of food, want to experience something that’s amazing?”

Hatter grinned and nodded.

“Okay. It’s in here.” He led Hatter into The Leaning Tower of Pizza
,
and ordered a large pie with extra cheese and pepperoni. “If you thought popcorn was good, wait until you taste this!”

Once the pizza was served, not another word was spoken other than happy little grunts and smacks as they devoured the entire thing. Hatter’s mouth was rimmed with tomato sauce, and there was a bit of cheese hanging in a skinny thread from his chin. “Your world is amazing, Henry! First popped corn and moving pictures of giants, then this Pete’s Ah. It’s wonderful!”

“Pizza. One word. And I agree, it’s pretty good. But so was the food you made in Wonderland. And I can’t pull a campfire and pot full of stew out of my pocket here.”

Hatter gave a solemn nod. “True. I can understand how that would be a hardship. When I get back to Wonderland, I’m going to need to learn how to make pizza, and find room in my pocket for the necessary equipment and ingredients.”

Someone must’ve fed coins into the jukebox at the far end of the pizza parlor, because the first poignant strains of “Bohemian Rhapsody” began playing. Hatter’s ears immediately perked, his head twisting to scan the room.

“You have troubadours in this world? Where are they? I can’t see them.” He stood up, trying to get a better view. “We had traveling musicians in Wonderland too. They would sing of Wonderland’s history, going from town to town. At least, they did before the Red Queen lopped off their heads. She was never overly fond of history. Still, I used to love to listen to the troubadours and bards.”

“Um, if by that you mean music, then yeah, we have bands and singers. Rock and roll, baby.”

Hatter’s head cocked and his eyebrows furrowed. “Do you mean to say you stone singers who are not well versed at their craft? That seems a bit harsh.”

“No. Rock and roll is the style of music. This is Queen you hear playing.”

“Which Queen? Not the Red one. I’ve heard her sing, and she sounds like a Bandersnatch caught in a bear trap.”

Henry grinned. “Not that kind of queen. It’s the name of a band, the group of people you hear singing.”

“Ah. An odd name, but fine music. Rather catchy. I like it. Now, where are these regal tune masters? I still don’t see them.”

“They aren’t really here. What you’re hearing is just a recording in a box, sort of like the movie we went to see.”

“Oh! I understand. How wonderful to have music at your fingertips! The owner of this establishment must be very wealthy indeed to have such magic in his pizza emporium.”

Henry shook his head again and laughed. “Pizzeria, and you don’t need to be rich to own music. When we get back to Alice’s, remind me to introduce you to an MP3 player.”

“Is that an instrument? This MP3? How does one play it?”

Henry laughed again. “You’ll see.” He glanced at his wristwatch and sighed. “Sorry, Hatter. It’s getting late. We’d better get back to Alice’s house. I think Uncle Leonard… er, the Red King wants to get an early start in the morning.”

They left the pizzeria and headed back toward Alice’s neighborhood. They’d just turned the corner onto Alice’s block, when Hatter grabbed Henry’s hand and pulled him to a stop.

“I just realized we probably won’t be alone again after this. Henry, I wanted to say… I mean….” Hatter’s tongue seemed to be tripping over words the way a drunk might stumble over curbs. “You and I, we… oh, bother. Sometimes words aren’t enough anyway.”

Henry’s eyes flew open when Hatter pulled him into a deep kiss, but soon fluttered closed again. Unusual feelings shot through him like cloud-to-cloud lightning bolts, electrifying him from the inside out. Hatter’s arms, strong and hard with muscle, wrapped around Henry’s body and held him close. Henry’s skin grew hot as his body responded to the intensity of Hatter’s kiss.

The kiss seemed to go on forever and not nearly long enough at the same time. Hatter pulled away long before Henry would’ve wanted. His breath was warm and smelled slightly of garlic from the pizza, but it made Henry feel slightly dizzy, like he’d been spinning in circles for too long.

“I don’t know when I’ll get the chance to kiss you again. I’ve been thinking of little else since that moment on the battlefield in the Confection Mountains.” Hatter sighed and pulled Henry in a bit closer, until their bodies were flush against one another. Henry could feel every inch of Hatter’s body pressed against him, and realized Hatter was enjoying the moment just as much as Henry was.

“Can I tell you a secret?” Henry’s arms were around Hatter’s slim waist, and he locked his fingers together, unwilling to let go. “I’m glad I’m going back with you. Every time I thought of you going to Wonderland without me, I got a sick sort of feeling in my stomach.”

“I feel the same way. I suppose we’ll have to think about separating sometime, though. But not tonight.”

“No, not tonight.” Henry tipped his face up toward Hatter, and was delighted when Hatter sought his lips again.

For the briefest moment, Henry wondered when he’d stopped actively disliking Hatter…. Perhaps on the battlefield in the Confection Mountains, or while slogging through the Neverglades. Or maybe Henry never really disliked Hatter at all, just the idea of liking him
too much
. Then the thought was gone, and Henry was again lost in the electricity of their kiss.

Their kiss this time had a gentler, longing feel to it. It made Henry hunger for more, but both knew it was past time to get home.

“We’d better get back before Alice calls out the police to look for us.” Henry reluctantly pulled away. They began walking back toward Alice’s house.