Authors: Alli Sinclair
âFabulous.' She'd spent the day alternating between false bravado and pure panic about dancing tango again.
âYou will learn.' He smiled, giving her confidence. âThe follower must surrender one's need for self-preservation and allow the leader to take control.'
âSo it is a macho dance! And that contradicts what you said before.'
âTango, like loveâ'
âIs complicated. Got it, but know this, I will only follow the male because it is a dance, not real life. I have not, nor will I ever, let a man tell me what to do. Women have their own brains and we can survive quite well without men if we choose.' She wanted to add a childish âSo there', but resisted.
âYou have finished with your ladies' freedom speech, yes? Or shall I wait for you to get it out of your system? Remember, we have not got all the night.'
âI'm done.'
For now
.
âVenting is cathartic, no? But please refrain from doing this when I am teaching.' He cleared his throat again. âIt is important for the leader to make sure the follower feels safe because if she does not, she will not reach a state of meditation and this would be very sad.'
âAre you talking about a Tango Nirvana?'
âYes. It is called
entrega
and is the Holy Grail of tango. It is a Holy Trinity, in fact. It is when two dancers meld perfectly into one and their moves and souls are entwined with the music, they create a moment of magic. Of course, it cannot last forever, but once it is glimpsed, the dancers search for it with desperation. Unfortunately, most never find it again.'
âIt sounds like you're talking about love.'
âLove?' His eyebrows shot so high they nearly collided with his hairline. âPfft. Daniela, please do not get us distracted. The next rule of tango is about discretion. Yes, there is passion but it is a conversation between the man and woman. It is not an open discussion for the world to see.'
âNo groping on the dance floor, eh?'
âWhat is this “groping”?'
âWhen someone feelsâOh, never mind. Okay, closed conversation. Got it.'
He rubbed his thumb and forefinger against his chin. âWe move on to the next ruleâyour expression. You must be serious and your face should convey the power of the emotions of the dance. No smiling.'
âI need to know all this before we get on the dance floor?'
âThere is moreâ'
âI am sorry for my absence.' A slight sheen of perspiration shone on Gualberto's forehead. âIt is good to meet with old friends, no?'
âYes, it is,' she said.
âEnough chit-chatting. You cannot be a wall flower,' said Carlos, nudging her leg with his cane. âYou have questions you want to ask,
sÃ
? Time to get busy.'
âHas the theory part finished? Are you going to teach me some real moves?'
So I don't get done for assault and battery?
âMy leg, it hurts tonight. Gualberto will show you. I have taught him everything he knows.'
His cousin grinned and shrugged his shoulders. A small wave of relief swept over Dani. Even though she hadn't yet danced with Carlos, she got the distinct impression it would not be a walk in the park. More than likely it'd be a crawl across broken glass.
âRightio.' She stood and held out her hand to Gualberto, who remained seated. âWhat? You've changed your mind?'
âSit.' Carlos grumbled.
âWhy?' She placed fists on her hips.
âSit down,' he said with more force.
âDon't use that tone with me. I don't care who you are.'
âDo as he says, Dani.' Gualberto motioned towards the chair.
She sat heavily and crossed her arms. âFine.'
âWe are at the next rule. The lady must wait to be asked to dance. ¿
Entiendes
?' Carlos clasped his hands around his cane and rested his chin on top.
âYes, I understand.' She hadn't made it to the dance floor and already she'd stuffed up.
âIt is not polite for a man to go up to a woman and ask her to dance. It puts pressure on her to say yes and makes him embarrassed if she says no. Argentines do not like to lose the face. Instead, we have
el cabeceo
. It is all about the eyes and is fair for both parties. If someone wants to dance they make eye contact and nod, if the other person agrees, they do the same. The contract is made but it is always the leader who goes to the follower. Then you dance for three songs. It is called a
tanda
.'
âWhy three?'
âIt is just so. Sometimes it is four or five, but mostly three. Do not say thank you before you have finished the
tanda
with your partner.'
âWhy not?' Learning Mandarin would be easier.
âThese are questions.'
âBut you're going to shove me on the floor in public where I might get arrested for assault. I need to understand what I'm letting myself in for.'
What on earth did Iris see in this stupid dance? It's full of rules, rules, rules. Where's the fun?
âYou
gringos
are fond of saying thank you but if you say this it means you are finished dancing with your partner. If it is said before the
tanda
is finished, you are considered rude.'
âThat's it?'
â
SÃ
. That is it.'
âEasy.'
âShow me.' He leant back and fixed a stare on Gualberto. Dani sipped her drink and wished for something stronger than half-melted ice cubes.
Gualberto caught her eye and gave a small nod. She allowed a minute smile to grace her lips. At least Gualberto seemed a tad more sympathetic to her dancing disability. He stood and took her hand, lead her to the dance floor while the
cortina
, the interval, played. Gualberto gently moved her body into position and he wrapped his fingers around hers and placed his other hand on the small of her back.
âReady? You follow me. We go slowly, slowly. But I ask a promise of you.'
âYes?'
âDo not close your eyes like the other time. This is dangerous.'
âYeah, sorry about that.' And she meant it. Poor Gualberto had been kind and she had repaid him by almost crippling him for life.
âDo not worry. We will change this. But you must listen to me.'
âUnderstood.'
âStand with your feet together. Put the weight on your toes. Do not let the stomach protrude.'
Bummer. She thought she'd been holding it in. She shouldn't have had that hamburger for lunch. Or the chips. Or the milkshake.
âOpen your chest.'
âPardon?'
âThe chest, open it. Like this.' He took a deep breath and puffed out his torso. âYou let the air in. You breathe better. You dance better.'
âI couldn't dance much worse.'
Gualberto joined her laughter then his expression turned serious. âCarlos is a tough teacher but he is the best.'
âBut you're teaching me, not him.'
âHe knows what he is doing. Do not worry, he will make sure you learn.'
She liked Gualberto's devotion to his cousin but so far Carlos had made Gualberto do all the dirty work. After all, sending the poor man for more punishment seemed pretty mean. But Gualberto didn't appear to care, and she enjoyed his company. Not in a romantic fashion, more like an older brother. For the first time in a while, someone showed concern for her and it felt nice.
âWhat can you show me?'
âYou follow. I lead. We will do something to surprise Carlos. My cousin, he expects a lot from people. With good reason.'
âWhat does that mean?'
âLet us concentrate on this first. Worry about your questions later,
sÃ
? Chin up. The floor is Medusa. You look at it and you turn to stone. Feet together. Left forward. Draw in right to left.'
Her temples throbbed from concentrating but she allowed Gualberto's smooth voice to guide her.
âRight foot step to side. Draw in left to your right. Step back on left.' He paused and let her catch up. âLet us continue. Step back on right. Cross left in front of right.'
She looked down to find her feet in what can only be classified as a dance position. Dani met Gualberto's eyes.
âYou have completed some of
el basico
.'
âAnd I didn't hurt you! Yay!' She let go and clapped her hands together. âMore! More!'
âYou are ready?'
âYes!' Adrenalin pumped through her body, spurring her on. It briefly crossed her mind that her mother may have felt the same way when she first learnt tango, but rather than wallow in sadness, Dani chose enjoyment. Musings about her errant mother could be left until the wee hours of the morning when insomnia came to visit.
âYou need to finish
el basico
.'
âBut I thought I'd just learnt a step?'
âIt is the first part. This is the next. Do it all together and you can ask Carlos a question.'
âGot it.' The way she was going, these articles would be complete by the end of the week.
âBack to the cross over. Step back on the right foot. Draw back the left next to right. Step with left to the side. Bring your right foot in. ¡
El fin
!'
âThat's it?' He nodded and she let her excitement bubble over. âLet's do it again!'
Gualberto counted and she followed diligently, revelling in learning the first ever dance step in her life. She counted her lucky stars that her grandma Stella couldn't see her now. Her grandma had refused to speak to Dani since she'd announced her business trip to Argentina and the hurt hadn't subsided yet. She closed her eyes briefly, remembering Stella's angry words: âIf you go to Argentina, do not expect me to talk to you again. When your mother left, you and I made an agreementâwe will not have involvement with tango,
ever
. If you see Iris, you'll only end up more hurt than you already are.'
It didn't matter how much Dani had promised she wouldn't track down her mother, Stella wouldn't sway. So now Stella wasn't on speaking terms with her own daughter and granddaughter. Dani still couldn't comprehend how her grandmother could be so extreme, especially as Stella had brought her up when her father passed away a year after Iris had left. But Stella's steely rule over her prevailed, even though Dani was an adult and lived on the other side of the world. Sure, her grandma had given up a lot to raise Dani and whether it was from guilt or a sense of duty, Dani usually did as Stella wishedâexcept for this trip to Argentina. It took a long time to learn, but some things took precedence over pleasing others and finding out about her mother and gaining insight into the dance that enchanted her was Dani's ticket to understanding herself. If Stella did miraculously show right now, Dani would be hauled off the dance floor and subjected to a lecture on why dabbling in the tango was like courting the devil. Until this moment, she would have agreed, but the thrill of learning a step, even if it was the most basic, almost outweighed Stella's potential wrath. Almost.
âCome. We show Carlos.'
They squeezed through the crowd until they reached the other side of the dance floor. Carlos was deep in conversation with a gentleman in his early sixties. His well-tailored suit and perfectly styled hair gave the impression he had money and taste.
âExcuse me, but you might want to see this,' Dani said. The men looked at her and Carlos folded his arms in an âimpress me' gesture.
She took her position with Gualberto and he guided her through the movements. Once they'd completed the steps, she looked over to find Carlos sporting a non-committal expression.
âWhat do you think?' She wished his opinion didn't count, but it did.
âIt is not bad. I owe you an answer,
sÃ
? Do you have a question?'
âI have lots. First though, I need a drink. I had no idea dancing could be so taxing.'
Carlos signalled to the waiter and she and Gualberto joined the men at the table.
âDaniela, this is Diego Alonso, Argentina's finest tango orchestra conductor.'
The gentleman took her hand and brushed his lips lightly against her skin. He gazed at her from under a veranda of dark lashes, offering a smile that could woo the hardest of female hearts.
âIt is nice to meet you. Carlos, he tells me you are writing about the history of the tango.'
âYes.' His intensity unnerved her. She subtly pulled her hand away and rested it on her lap. The quartet fell into the silence born of people struggling to find a common thread for conversation.
âDaniela, I am surprised by your progress. My cousin, he has done well,' Carlos eventually said and slapped Gualberto on the back. They laughed as if sharing a secret. âWe can work with this. Maybe you will be the next
Gringa Magnifica
. What do you think, Alonso?'
âDo not ask such a question. Iris and I do not talk any more.' He dropped his gaze and lowered his voice. âNot since she left me without saying a word.'
The moment the words hit Dani's ears, all the enthusiasm fuelling the new dance moves dissipated. This man had dated Iris?
âYes, I am sorry about your breakup,' Carlos said.
She took in Diego's long fingersâthe fingers that had once caressed her mother. Anger ripped through her. Iris shouldn't have been with any man other than her father. If she'd just stayed put and worked things out like a normal person ...
âAh,' Diego shrugged. âIt is life, no? A woman loves a man, she changes the mind, she leaves.'
So Iris still had a penchant for leaving and disappointing people she loved. Pain stabbed Dani when she remembered how Iris had constantly disappointed her by saying she'd do something then cancel without a solid reason. Like the time she'd promised to go to the art exhibition at Dani's kindergarten but never showed. It didn't matter that she'd won first prize, the only prize she ever wanted was her mother's love and presence.