Lulu in Honolulu (9 page)

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Authors: Elisabeth Wolf

BOOK: Lulu in Honolulu
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CUT!! I've got to admit that sometimes getting your parents' attention is harder than other times. I didn't mean to take a dip with the dolphins to get them out of their party. Actually, I wouldn't have minded sneaking into the fancy luau and watching Caridyn and Uncle Akamu perform. But, from one kid to another: when the opportunity to swim with dolphins comes up, take it no matter what—even with your clothes on. Now back to: ACTION!!

SCENE 4: GETTING FRESH

EXT. KAPI'OLANI COMMUNITY COLLEGE FARMERS' MARKET—SATURDAY, 7:30 A.M.

Lulu and Maya scurry through O'ahu's biggest farmers' market where everything is Hawaiian grown or made.

CAMERA FOLLOWS Lulu and Maya. They take turns pushing what looks like an airport baggage cart. They pass bananas, pineapples, mangos, coconuts, macadamia nuts, and supersized dinosaur kale.

Lulu heads left. Maya yanks her right.

LULU

(shaking her moppy hair)

I know this shortcut to get to the Paniolo Kettle Korn.

MAYA

Good, except kettle corn's not on the
Seas the Day
luncheon menu. This way.

Lulu follows but soon wanders toward a baked goods stall. She sniffs baskets of freshly baked taro sweet bread. Maya tugs her along.

MAYA

Do you know how long it takes to cook
laulau
? C'mon.

They turn down an aisle that feels like a tropical forest. There are all sizes and colors of orchid plants. Lulu pauses to stroke a waxy, shiny red anthurium and pricks her finger on a tiny green pineapple growing on a miniature tree.

MAYA

(calling out)

Move it, Lu. We gotta cook Hawaiian plate lunch for seventy people and deliver it by noon!

Lulu and Maya stop at a seafood vendor. Lulu stares deeply into the eyes of formerly alive
opah
(moonfish). Maya buys twenty-five pounds of butterfish.

They load up their cart with pork, chicken, mangos, and sacks of chocolate-covered macadamia nuts.

On the way to the car, they roll past the prepared-food stalls. Lulu deeply breathes in and out through her nose so many times she's about to be dizzy.

LULU

(to Maya)

If I could invent my own perfume, it would be the smell of steaming, roasting, frying, scrambling, barbecuing, baking, and sizzling that I smell right now.

Maya's dark, soft almond-shaped eyes fold in the corners as she smiles.

MAYA

Truthfully, Lulu, making perfume from the scent of cooking food might be easier than cooking lunch for your parents' movie crew.

SCENE 5: COOKING UP A STORM

INT. HARRISONS' KITCHEN—SUNDAY, 11:30 A.M.

Lulu, her hair bunched and scrunched under her ALOHA hat, sits on a stool trying to wrap little balls of chopped, seasoned fish and pork into taro leaves. The meaty, fishy balls keep splatting onto the floor.

Watson circles under Lulu. Every time a morsel hits the blond-wood floor, Watson licks it up and then rubs his bulging stomach over the wet spot left by his tongue.

Noelani perches next to Lulu. She wraps the pork and fish filling like a pro. Liam stands next to Noelani and ties big ti leaves around each of her neat green balls.

LIAM

Lulu, you better hurry 'cause I don't think I've tied up more than two of your
laulau
. The ones I'm doing are all Noelani's.

LULU

The fish and pork pieces don't stay inside my leaves. Making
laulau
is harder than I thought.

NOELANI

Cooking for so many people is harder than I thought.

Maya slides six
laulau
into the steamer.

MAYA

We better get more
laulau
packets dropped in the steamer oven soon or we'll end up bringing them raw!

Noelani reaches over and helps Lulu.

Auntie Moana and Uncle Akamu enter. Their wise eyes sweep around the room. The Harrisons' usually spotless kitchen is spotted beyond recognition. Pots, pans, bowls, spoons, knives, cutting boards, and electric choppers, mixers, and blenders cover every surface from the countertop to the stovetop. Water puddles under Kenna and Kapono, who just got out of the pool but are now slicing mangos for salsa. Children's chatter mixes with the sound of the waves crashing outside the open kitchen windows. The loudest noise, however, is Maleko, who bangs, taps, and clangs spoons between stirring the macaroni and rice.

Lulu waves.

LULU

Aloha
! We had a late start. Before we got cooking, I taught everyone how to make my special coconut shake.

AUNTIE MOANA

In fifteen minutes, we're supposed to drive all the food over to the studio. What's done?

Lulu stands up and knocks a mound of ti leaves to the floor.

LULU

Geez peas! I don't think anything is actually ALL done.

Maya looks up from the steamer oven as she pulls out
laulau
.

MAYA

Moana, Akamu, pick up a spoon or something. We need your hands because—

KENNA

(cries out)

AHHHH! I'm gushing blood!

Everyone rushes to where Kenna holds her little bloody finger over mushy, mangled pieces of mango.

KAPONO

(guilty voice)

I didn't push your hand. You cut yourself all by yourself!

KENNA

(through tears)

You did too.

(looks at Lulu)

I might have gotten squirts of my blood in your famous mango salsa.

LULU

Probably will taste fine. I can add it as one of my ingredients.

Auntie Moana takes Kenna by the hand that doesn't have a bleeding finger.

AUNTIE MOANA

Come. Let's clean you up.

MAYA

(to Lulu)

That's now four hands gone.

Lulu looks at the Ohana kids all now standing around where Kenna had been seated.

LULU

(panicky)

You guys, we've gotta get these lunches to Diamond Head Studio or else I'm…well…toast!

SCENE 6: SICK ON THE SET

INT. DIAMOND HEAD STUDIO, BACK OF SOUND STAGE—12:30 P.M.

MAXWELL

(joking to Lulu)

It doesn't look like your food has killed anyone yet.

Maxwell flashes Lulu a playful smile. He runs his fingers through his bushy hair while Alexis grins at him. Alexis gracefully sits down on a folding chair next to him.

LULU

People don't die from delicious, home-cooked food.

A tall, paper-thin actress with white-blond hair approaches.

ACTRESS

(looks from Alexis to Lulu)

Which of you is the daughter who's the cook? How divine that Linc and Fiona have their own chef?!

Two men who work on the set sit down with plates of
laulau
, macaroni salad, and rice. Maxwell introduces them as the KEY GRIP and SOUND ENGINEER.

SOUND ENGINEER

(with mouth full)

Delicious lunch.

LULU

Mahalo
. Glad you like the plate lunch.

Linc drapes an arm around Lulu's shoulder.

LINC

(teasing)

This is my daughter who could be a professor or a chef or in trouble for something or another.

LULU

Daaad!

LIAM

(shouts through the open stage door)

C'mon, Lulu! We're going!

Lulu looks outside. The Ohana kids wave their arms from the parking lot. They have just returned from a tour around the studio with Fiona.

Lulu stands. Pauses at Alexis.

LULU

(to Alexis)

Can you bring me home?

ALEXIS

(flashes her big violet eyes at Lulu)

Not a chance.

MAXWELL

She's gonna stay for a while. I'll keep her busy.

Lulu rolls her eyes and heads across the sound stage to join her friends when SUDDENLY—

ACTRESS

Call an ambulance!!

The Actress clutches her stomach and doubles over in pain. Linc rushes to her side. Alexis, always fast with her phone, punches in 911.

Key Grip stands but then slumps back down. His crew of grips, brawny guys who do the hauling, hanging, and repairing on the set, kneel over their boss.

KEY GRIP

(mumbling)

I'm so dizzy. I can't stand.

MAXWELL

(in a raspy voice)

My insides are squirming like venomous snakes.

Fiona staggers in from the parking lot. The Sound Engineer races to help her.

FIONA

I'm not sure if I'm seasick from filming boat scenes or if I'm going to die.

SOUND ENGINEER

(to Fiona)

Sorry, darling.

Sound Engineer lets go of Fiona, who crumples to the ground. The Sound Engineer retches a few feet away.

Linc crawls over to Fiona but stops every few inches to squeeze his arms across his stomach as if he's holding his guts in place.

LULU

(frantic)

Mom! Dad! Are you going to live?!

ALEXIS

(tossing her long, skinny arm around Lulu's neck)

They'll probably live but then they'll kill you.

MOANING and GAGGING echo around the vast sound stage. SCREAMS of sirens become louder and louder.

SCENE 7: PICKING UP

INT. NOELANI'S SIMPLE, SQUARE-SHAPED ONE-STORY HOUSE—LIVING ROOM MONDAY AFTERNOON

Framed pictures of a young, uniformed woman are propped up around the room. A faded green couch and wood coffee table fill the small, bright room. Half-filled plastic bins sit along a sun-splashed wall.

Lulu sprawls on the couch while Noelani stands in the middle of the living room. They play a game of charades with Hawaiian words. Noelani taps her heart and airily raises her hands towards the sky.

LULU

Birds?

Noelani shakes her head. She repeats her motions slowly and gracefully.

LULU

Heart attack?

Noelani shakes head again.

NOELANI

You're just totally guessing.

LULU

That's because I don't know at all.

Both girls GIGGLE. They don't notice Noelani's grandmother, TUTU, enter. She's carrying armfuls of old clothes.

TUTU

What was the word?

NOELANI

Akua
.

(stares at Lulu)

It means “spirit.”

TUTU

Well, that's a hard one.

Lulu springs from the couch. She takes the heavy pile of clothes from Tutu.

TUTU

Mahalo
, Lulu. I was hunting for Noelani's baby clothes and found old uniforms belonging to Noelani's mom.

She holds up a blue coat.

LULU

(touches the coat)

Geez peas! It's heavy.

NOELANI

(small voice)

That's a dress uniform jacket.

TUTU

This isn't just any dress uniform jacket. This is the jacket your mom wore when she received her first medal.

LULU

She has more than one?!

TUTU

My daughter, Lieutenant Colonel Nui, has eight medals so far.

LULU

(to Noelani)

Your mom's a real hero! My dad just plays one in the movies!

NOELANI

My mom's really good at vanishing.

SILENCE.

Noelani scrunches into a ball on the floor. Lulu sits down near her friend

LULU

There's no one who'd like to disappear more right now than me. Maybe you can get me into the Marines?

Noelani smiles.

Tutu sits behind the girls on the couch and rests a hand on each of their heads.

TUTU

So, Lulu, you learned yesterday that when you make
laulau
, you have to keep the ti leaves and the taro leaves separate. Ti leaf makes you sick if you eat it.

LULU

I also learned that my parents want to launch me into the ocean in an outrigger canoe without a paddle.

Tutu laughs.

TUTU

Actually, I talked to your mother a little while ago. She wants you to know that everyone's fine.

LULU

No one's in the hospital?

TUTU

Well, not anymore.

Lulu, bug-eyed, looks at Noelani.

TUTU

She'd like you to come home.

NOELANI

See, Lulu? You were terrified that your parents never wanted to see you again. But they haven't forgotten you. And it's only been one day.

TUTU

(speaks gently to Noelani)

And your mother hasn't forgotten you, either. A text came from her ship today. She's trying to get back to see you before school starts.

CLACKING from the doorknocker.

A tall, strong man with stubby brown hair, COLONEL ADAMS, walks in followed by a very pregnant red-haired woman, MRS. ADAMS. Lulu can't decide whether to stare at the woman's enormous belly or her tomato-red hair. The woman understands Lulu's dilemma and smiles at her.

MRS. ADAMS

Aloha
. We came to pick up the baby clothes. Are we interrupting?

TUTU

Aloha
! Come in. Colonel and Mrs. Adams, this is Lulu Harrison. And, of course, you know Noelani.

Before anyone can answer, they turn in the direction of HEAVY WHEEZING coming from the front door.

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