Lucky 13 (19 page)

Waving to Harold as I pass, I head straight for Lucy’s office. Her door is closed, so I knock. No answer. I head back up front to talk to Harold, but he’s not at his desk. In fact, I don’t see anyone roaming around. Looking down at my watch, it’s only a little after three o’clock. Someone should still be around.

There has to be a way to find answers. In search of anything that might be helpful, I head to my office and start pulling binders off the shelf. Protocol. There has to be a protocol for every situation. Lucy and Grant are part of the program. I’m sure this isn’t the first time someone has been found. What would Grandma normally do in a situation like this?

Skimming each binder, I find what I’m looking for after only a few minutes. My worst fears are confirmed after reading only the first sentence.

Should any participant in the program be placed in imminent danger, please refer to the section on relocation.

He’s leaving. He might already be gone. He didn’t call. He can’t. I’ve lost him again.

Throwing the binder across the room, I almost hit Harold as he walks into my office. “I’m so sorry, Harold. I didn’t see you.”

“It’s quite all right, Miss Madison. I have something for you.” Harold hands me an envelope with my name written on the front in all capital letters.

“Thank you,” I reply as he gives me a weak smile and a wave before closing the door as he exits.

I turn the envelope over in my hands a few times, afraid to open it. I’m assuming it’s either from Grant or Lucy. No one else would have known that I would come here looking for answers.

Sliding my finger under the flap, I carefully open the envelope. Holding my breath as I pull out the single sheet of white paper. As I unfold it, I pray that I haven’t lost him forever.

Madison,

If you’re reading this, then I’m gone. My father is a smart man, and it was only a matter of time before he found us. He’s also a very dangerous man. That’s the reason we left in the first place. We always knew he would find us. He’s persistent, especially when he drinks. He used to threaten my mother, promising to never stop looking for her if she ever left him. It was the one thing I knew he would follow through on in his lifetime. When we left, he lost all control.

People are going to ask you where I am. They’re going to be confused. I’ve told my coaches that my grandfather is ill and that we are moving to take care of him. You can tell people the same or you can tell them nothing. I’ll leave it up to you.

I want you to know that no matter how long it takes, I will find you again. Given the choice, I would stay and fight. For us, for me, for my mother. I don’t have a choice, however, and it’s a fight that I could never win.

I promise not to let it take as long this time. I’m not sure how I’m going to survive without you. You’re my everything, Madison. I love you with all my heart, I have since the day we met and I will for the rest of my life. I can’t imagine my future without you, and I hope you feel the same.

Until we meet again …

Love,

Joshua

As the letter floats to my desk, the tears begin to fall. I cry for Joshua, and all he had to endure before coming here. I cry for Grant, and all that he’s lost because he’s been forced to leave. I cry for Lucy, and all she managed to escape, only to be forced to start over again. Most of all, I cry for myself. As selfish as I feel for crying for my own loss, I can’t help it.

For the first time since losing my mother, and then my grandma, I was finally at a place in my life where I felt things were turning around for me. I felt loved. I was happy. I had found the person I was meant to spend the rest of my life with. The darkness of those two weeks after the accident were starting to become clear.

Right now, I feel alone. Nothing more. Nothing less.

Tucking the letter back into its envelope and then into my purse, I leave the Foundation and head for the one place that I have left that may bring me a little peace. I don’t want to be alone right now.

Wrapping my coat tightly around me, I take a seat on the bench inside the gazebo and stare at the water. The wind is whipping, causing tiny waves on the normally glassy surface. The chill in the air has kept people away today, so I have the entire place to myself.

“Hey, Grams.” I get choked up just saying her name. I’ve never had to face anything alone. She was always there for me. Not this time. This time, I have to figure out how to handle it myself. “He’s gone. I know you already know this, but I needed to say it out loud. It makes it real.”

The tears begin to fall and I don’t bother to wipe them away. More will replace them and it will be a losing battle that I don’t have the strength to fight.

“I get it now,” I say. “I finally understand why you never told me about him. When I woke up and couldn’t remember anything, it was your way of protecting me from something like this. You knew that he would eventually have to leave, that he couldn’t stay here forever. I wish you had been wrong. I still want you to be wrong. I want to wake up tomorrow and for things to be as they were yesterday. Yesterday was perfect. He was here.”

My voice cracks as the emotions I’ve been pushing down finally begin to rise in my chest. I let out a sob, the pain too great to hold in any longer. Every time I try to reign it in, I break down again. Finally, I let go. Lying down on the bench, I curl into a ball and let it all out. My body shakes violently as the sobs come one after another, tears burning my face.

When I think I can pull myself back together, I sit up and wipe the remnant of tears from my face. “I love him, Grams. I will find him again. It may not be today or tomorrow, but it will happen. One day. I know you left me clues, I just have to find them, and I will.”

Standing, I find my inner strength. This is not the end. Not even close. My life began when I met him. It was shaped when I fell in love with him. It won’t end until we are together again.

Chapter 18

I dedicate myself to solving the mysterious disappearance of Grant. For months, I look through paperwork at the Foundation every day after school. After searching Grandma’s office and coming up empty, I attempt to recruit help. No one knows anything or if they do they’re not telling me. Lucy had been in charge of relocations. She would have been the person to help me.

As graduation approaches, fear starts to rear its ugly head. What if I never find him? What if I leave here and he comes looking for me? Should I stay or should I go? If I do go, where should I go? Where will he look for me?

Closing my laptop, I change and crawl into bed feeling defeated. Twisting the bracelet that’s still tied to my wrist, I close my eyes and remember the look on his face when he gave it to me. I hold on to that, my heart beating rapidly in my chest, as I pray to see him in my dreams tonight. I haven’t dreamt about him in weeks. When the dreams do come, they never end the way I want them to. He always fades away, never saying goodbye. I think that’s the hardest part for me. I didn’t get a chance to say goodbye.

Pounding on my door wakes me. Looking at the clock on my bedside table, I realize that I forgot to set my alarm last night. I’m late. That’s going to be Libby picking me up for graduation, and I’m not ready like I promised her I would be.

“Mads!” I open the door just as Libby hollers my name. “Hey. Why are you not dressed yet?” Taking in my appearance, Libby wrinkles her nose at me.

“I overslept. Give me ten minutes.”

Rushing to the bathroom, I leaving Libby standing in the open doorway. I turn the shower on, and quickly wash my body, not waiting for the water to warm up. Libby has clothes picked out for me and a brush in her hand when I open the bathroom door. She braids my hair quickly after I get dressed, smooths down the fly away hairs, and we’re out the door.

My father stands, clapping as they call my name. I wave to him as I walk across the stage, accept my diploma, and head back to my seat. After everything that’s happened this year, I’m happy that we were able to make peace with each other. In fact, if it weren’t for my father, I may not have survived loosing Grant.

Chester and Libby were great, but my father is the one who pulled me back up when I thought I couldn’t go on. The day he came to my apartment was a bad day. It was only a week after Grant disappeared and the school called him to check on me after I hadn’t shown up all week. Mrs. Schroder gave him my address, concerned that something may have happened to me since I wasn’t returning her phone calls.

When I looked through the peephole and saw him standing in the hallway, I debated on whether or not I should open the door. Knowing that he wasn’t going to go away, I decided to let him in. He took one look at my appearance and knew that something was horribly wrong.

For the first time since losing my mother, my father wrapped his arms around me and hugged me like a father should. I broke down in his arms, crying for hours before I was finally able to tell him what had happened. I told him everything, including the truth about Grant, knowing that he would keep my secret.

He confessed about the house and apologized for being a horrible father. He blamed himself for the downfall of our relationship. He even confessed that he felt like he forced me to file for emancipation, leaving me no other option than to take control of my life. It was the most honest conversation we had ever had. Heartwarming and real and honest.

Our relationship hasn’t been the same since. I call him regularly just to check in. We have dinner together every Sunday night. Sometimes here and sometimes at his house. He’s teaching me how to cook. It’s a slow process, but I’m getting there. He wanted me to move back in, but I refused. I wanted to prove to him that I could survive on my own. There are days I wish I had moved back home. It would be nice to have someone else around from time to time.

That’s where Libby comes in. She comes over almost every day. Sometimes with Chester, other times with Megan or Angie. When she does come alone, I spend most of the time crying. I think that’s why she likes to bring other people with her.

Now with graduation upon me comes more responsibility. I take my role with the Foundation seriously, working hard every day and playing hard on the weekends. My days are spent finding ways to raise money and my nights are spent searching for any clues that might lead me to Grant. For the first few weeks, both felt like dead ends. Then Amber showed up and my life took on a whole new meaning.

A single mother of one, Amber is here to get away from an abusive husband. Her daughter, Eva, is only three and the cutest little girl I’ve ever seen. Amber’s skills are minimal, but her passion and conviction to start over and get away from her husband are amazing. She reminds me a lot of Lucy. That’s when I put it all together, how I’m going to find him.

With Lucy’s replacement, Susan, on vacation, I’m left to take care of Amber and her daughter. I begin the paperwork for Amber immediately. It’s my first time going through the system, but I quickly learn the way it works. I’m amazed I didn’t think of this before. My answers were here the entire time; I just happened to be looking in the wrong place.

It’s a six-step process to enter the program, but it’s rather simple and extremely quick. Everything happens in a matter of hours, and then the person you used to be magically disappears. Poof!

Step one: Enter them into the system.

Step two: Wait for an email from an anonymous person who will send me their new identities.

Step three: Forward that information to an anonymous person who will reply with a new location, randomly selected from a list of places that the Foundation supports.

Step four: Have Amber initial a contract stating that she will never talk about the program or her old identity to anyone outside of the Foundation.

Step five: Arrange for Amber and her daughter to leave the city.

Step six: File the paperwork, alphabetically by NEW last name.

As soon as I finish taking care of Amber and Eva, I arrange for them to be taken to my father’s house to rest for the evening. After explaining the situation to him, he’s more than happy to help for the night. I promise to come over after I finish up and help them get settled. Amber is extremely appreciative of everything, and as we hug, she cries tears of joy. I cry along with her, but for an entirely different reason.

Her paperwork is sitting on my desk, staring at me when I walk back into my office. I pick it up, hug it to my chest, and say a silent prayer thanking Grandma for working her magic. Unlocking the records room feels wrong. To anyone walking by, it looks as if I’m following through with the final step of the process. I know better than that. I may be filing Amber’s paperwork, but I’m also looking for answers. Answers that I know I’ll find somewhere in one of the seven filing cabinets in front of me. The question becomes … which last name would their file be under?

Assuming Lucy and Grant utilized the Foundation to disappear again, would they have a new file or would they use their “real” last name again? I start by looking under F for Fisher. I’m disappointed when I don’t immediately find a new file for them. The cabinets are jam-packed with records, and after almost forty years of helping people, I’m not surprised.

It’s going to take me all summer, but I will find the file I’m looking for. For now, I’m going to put Amber’s file away and head to my father’s to make sure they are settling in. Before turning the light off, I take one final look at the cabinets. I pray that I find the file quickly. I only have eight weeks before I leave for college. After that, it’ll take a plane ride to come back and look through the files.

Knowing that Grant and his mother wouldn’t stay in the immediate area, not by choice but by design, I applied to schools all over the country. I declined my acceptance to anything within driving distance. If I could make it home in less than six hours by car, it wasn’t a good option in my opinion.

I also only selected schools that have amazing business programs. Grant knew the conditions of my grandma’s will. If he’s looking to find me like I’m looking for him, he’s taking any clues he can to try and piece the puzzle together. After debating with my father about my decision for weeks, I finally settled on the University of Colorado in Denver. It’s far enough away to be plausible and their business school is one of the best in the country.

Once Amber and Eva are settled for the night, I head back to my place to make a game plan for the rest of summer. I figure if Grandma helped a minimum of one hundred people a year for the last thirty years, I have three thousand files to go through. That means, working five days a week for the next eight weeks, I would need to go through a minimum of seventy-five files a day to make sure that I get through most of them. That’s a lot of files.

My instincts tell me to go for it, to at least try. Start with the letter A and get moving. My gut tells me that something about that plan is wrong. I don’t know what it is, but something is off. Maybe I should consult my father on this? With all his military training, he might be able to help guide me in the right direction before I get started.

***

I meet with my father before work the next morning. Amber and Eva are leaving as I arrive. She hugs me one last time, thanking me for everything. I promise myself I won’t cry, but as soon as they’re out of sight, one tear escapes. This job is both rewarding and heartbreaking at the same time.

“Dad,” I holler, walking through the front door.

“Madison,” he replies, sounding surprised to see me as he walks out of the living room. “What are you doing here?”

“I have a favor to ask you. Do you have a few minutes to talk?” He motions for me to follow him back into the living room and I take a seat on the couch across from him. “So, I know how I can find Grant, but I need your help.”

After eying me suspiciously for a few minutes, he finally speaks. “How?”

I tell him about the filing cabinets and my plan. He listens intently as I rattle on about the process and the system. Once I’m finished, I ask him what I came here to ask.

“Where do I start? If this was a military assignment and you were looking to find someone who didn’t want to be found, where would you start?”

“That’s a tough question, Madison. The problem is, it’s not a military thing. It’s your grandma’s thing. She and I never saw eye to eye, and she never would have listened to my suggestions when it came to something like that. She probably would have done the opposite, in fact. Maybe that’s where you should start?”

His response makes sense, but it doesn’t answer my question. “So, where would the military start? I’ll do the exact opposite.”

“We’d start at A and try our best to move to Z as quickly as possible. What information is stored in the files again?”

“It’s filed by the last initials of the
new
last names. The full last name isn’t even on file. The only information in the file would be original first names, relocation city, and their signed contract which only requires initials.”

“I say go against the grain, start at Z and work your way backward. It doesn’t feel like it’s the right way of doing things, which means it probably is since it’s your grandma’s system.” He pauses for a moment. I know he’s not done talking judging by the way he’s looking at me. “What are you going to do once you have what you need?”

“Find him.”

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?”

I never saw Grant’s father after that day. He didn’t follow me home from school and I haven’t seen him lurking around since then. I’m still waiting to catch him watching me out of the corner of my eye. If I were him, I would be. He has to think that I know something. After all, he showed up at my house, looking for Grant. Either way, I’m glad he’s gone. Grant’s somewhere else, safe, because he showed up here.

“I’ve been constantly aware of my surroundings like we talked about. I haven’t seen his father or anyone else watching me. I think it’s safe.” I’m surprised by the amount of confidence I hear in my voice when I speak.

“Please be sure before you go to him. You can’t be too careful. When you do go, make sure you let me help you get there. Just because you don’t see him, doesn’t mean he isn’t watching you. He could be tracking your phone records or credit cards. You said he was a cop, right?”

“Yeah.” I never thought of that. At first I was pissed off that Grant didn’t at least call me and let me know he was safe.

Now, it all makes more sense.

“Assuming you find him, I’m going to get you a new credit card to use when you leave. I’ll put it in my name in case he is tracking you. You can’t be too careful, Madison. I’m sure the last thing you want is to lead him right to Grant.”

I thank my father and rush to work, my spirit renewed and ready to get started. I have a plan to find Grant, and that’s more than I had last week. I may not know where he is right now, but I will find him before I leave for college. All the answers are two doors down.

I have a long list of things that need to be done each day. As soon as those are completed, I set myself up in the records room and go through file after file. I stay late most nights, skipping lunch and eating a late dinner before crawling into bed mentally exhausted.