Lucid (36 page)

He nodded to the girls and said, “I’ll meet you ladies at the food table in a minute.”

I watched them walk off and giggle to each other with an amused smirk. “You
so
didn’t need a good luck charm tonight.”

“Come with me,” Drystan said in a serious tone. All sense of the happy-go-lucky Drystan he’d projected to his dance partners completely disappeared as he clasped my hand and pulled me over to a café table off to the right of the band’s stage. After he handed me my keys, he slid a chair out, then grabbed what he’d hidden under the table. “You left this behind.”

I stared at the bundle of silver silk in his hand, and my face flamed when I remembered where I’d left my mother’s shawl. I’d been so distracted by Ethan’s heart-stopping kiss that I’d completely forgotten I’d dropped it in the coach’s office. Drystan must’ve found it when he was there with his buddies.

“Thanks,” I said past my gulp of embarrassment, pulling the material out of his hand.

I lifted the shawl and two items unrolled from the silky material, falling to the floor. I bent to grab my mask, while Drystan retrieved Ethan’s.

When I reached for Ethan’s mask, he didn’t release it. My gaze locked with his worried green one as he spoke in a hushed voice, “I don’t see him. At all.”

Welcome to my world. I don’t see Ethan either
. I nodded my understanding, my mind far away. I was ready to be alone with Ethan. “I know.”

Drystan frowned and shook his head, refusing to release the black mask. “No, Nara, what I’m saying is…I see darkness. Total ’effing blackness!”

Ethan definitely had an on-the-verge-of-eruption vibe I’d never seen before tonight. From the way he acted when he saw me with Drystan, to the fight in the hall with Drake. That fight was beyond frightening—the violence, the powerful strength, the focused detachment as he rammed him with a sword!—but even though I couldn’t explain any of that yet, through it all, Ethan had still thought of defending me and another innocent person. He was
still
Ethan. Drake was pure evil. Of that I was certain.

I laid my hand on Drystan’s jacket sleeve and nodded. “I’m the light, Drystan. I’ll be fine.”

I started to turn, but Drystan clasped my wrist. “If there’s enough darkness, even light can be completely consumed by it, Nara.”

“Not if it’s the brightest kind of darkness.” I smiled at his baffled look and squeezed his hand, then walked away.

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Ethan stood just inside the entrance of the gym with his arms folded. A sour look creased his face as I approached.

“I don’t like him touching you, Nara.”

“I know.” I sighed and breezed past, leaving him with nothing to do but follow me out of the entrance and into the cool night air.

Before I’d taken more than ten steps, he grasped my elbow and pulled me to the side. Taking the shawl out of my hands, he said, “It’s freezing out here,” then wrapped it around my shoulders the way I’d worn it earlier.

Once he finished tying it, he said, “What’d he say to you?”

I tilted my head and decided to tell him the truth. “He thinks you’re bad for me. That you’ll consume me.”

Ethan’s gaze narrowed and his jaw muscle jumped as he gazed back toward the gym with sheer dislike.

I ran my finger along the twitching muscle. “Do you plan to consume me, Ethan?”

His gaze snapped back to mine and he clasped my shoulders, pulling me so close I had to crane my neck to meet his darkened gaze. “Not in the way he meant.”

Every bone in my body melted at the heated look in his gaze as he stared at my lips with hungry intent. But instead of kissing me, he pressed his lips tenderly to my forehead and spoke in a desperate whisper, “You totally break me apart, Nara. You’re the only one who has the power to do that.
You
consume me.”

I wrapped my arms around his waist and met his tortured gaze, hoping he saw all the love I felt for him reflected in my eyes. “Take me home and then we can talk.”

* * *

“What about your car?” I asked Ethan as he pulled mine into the garage.

He cut the engine. “I’ll get it later.”

The moment we walked inside, Houdini came charging at Ethan in a full-on attack mode. I screamed out, “No, Houdini!” at the same time Ethan grabbed either side of Houdini’s jowls and pulled him down to the floor.

“Settle, boy!” he said in a fierce, commanding tone.

While Houdini alternately squirmed and growled as if he were confused as to what to do, Ethan glanced over his shoulder. “Hold him for a second while I take my jacket off.”

I grabbed Houdini’s collar. “I’m so sorry! He’s never done this before.” It wasn’t easy holding a hundred-pound straining ball of muscle at bay while Ethan shrugged out of his coat. “Help!” I said when my heels began to skid across the floor. Houdini was growling less, but he was sniffing the air like crazy.

Ethan tossed his jacket on the floor and Houdini yanked out of my hold to dive onto the coat with vicious ferocity.

“That should keep him busy for a while.” Ethan smirked, then clasped my hand and pulled me upstairs as Houdini began to shred the jacket.

“But your coat?” I resisted, freaked out by Houdini’s behavior and the sound of tearing fabric.

Ethan snorted and tugged me along. “He recognized evil’s scent all over me. He’s the perfect guard dog. You’ll have to tell me how you convinced your mom to let you have him.”

Was that an indirect reference to Drake?
With one last look at Houdini downstairs, I let Ethan pull me down the hall and into my room.

After he shut my door, I said, “Mom let me get Houdini after I almost got shot.”

Ethan whipped around. “What! Someone tried to shoot you? Why are you just now telling me?”

“I’m not even sure if it was an accident or intended,” I replied, holding my hands up in a calming manner. I shrugged. “Well, at least that’s why Mom agreed. I’ve always wanted a dog, but after someone broke into my room and Gran got hurt, I was determined to protect myself and my stuff, hence…Houdini.”

“Hold on…slow down. Tell me everything from the beginning,” Ethan said just as Houdini began scratching at the door to be let in.

Ethan opened the door and grabbed Houdini’s collar when he tried to bound into my room. “Not tonight, buddy. I’m taking care of Nara.” He pointed to the doorway. “You can guard the door.”

With a quick bark and a look to me, and then Ethan as if to say, “But, this is what I always do,” Houdini held his ground.

Ethan patted his head. “She’s safe.” Houdini looked at me once more, then trotted back out and pivoted in a quick circle before laying down right in front of the door.

Once Ethan shut my door again, I shook my head in amazement and pulled off my heels. “You’re going to have to teach me how you do that. He listens to me really well, but not
that
well.”

Ethan clasped my hand and tugged me over to sit on my bed, then he grabbed the chair from my desk and set it across from me. As soon as he was seated, he grasped my hands. “Tell me everything that’s happened.”

“Before I tell you anything, I need to know…are things better with your parents now?”

Frustration flashed through his eyes, but he gave a quick nod. “It’s as good as it’ll get.”

That was something at least. I took a deep breath, then said, “You should always trust your instincts when it comes to me. If you get a vibe something’s wrong, it probably is.”

Ethan released one of my hands and jammed his through his hair, frustration written on his face. “Why, Nara? Why didn’t you tell me the truth?”

I clasped his free hand in both of mine. “I didn’t want to pull you away from your family. I wanted you to have the time you needed to heal, not just for you, but for us. It’s what you said you needed, remember?”

Ethan went pale and I thought I saw remorse flicker across his face before he closed his eyes tight. Then his fierce blue eyes drilled into me. “You always come first, Nara. Keeping you safe is most important to me. Above all else. Do you understand?”

When I looked down and nodded, he clasped my chin and lifted my head so I had to look at him. Running his thumb across my bottom lip, he pulled it from my teeth. “Now tell me everything.”

And so I did. I told him about Fate’s new scare tactics and the guy who attacked me in the library. When I got to the part about my library attacker wanting me to give him my journal and how I flat-out refused to give it up, Ethan looked confused. “What journal?”

“Oh!” I jumped up and retrieved both his leather journal and Freddie’s blue book from under my mattress. Ethan turned the chair sideways as I handed him the journal. “This was supposed to be a surprise for you when you returned, but under the circumstances, I may as well give it to you now.”

Ethan thumbed through my raven journal, while I paced and told him the rest. Well, most of it. Just like I protected Ethan’s secret, I protected Drystan’s as well, making up another reason as to how Drystan and I recovered the books from Drake’s locker. I also left out my training and my lucid dream concerning Drystan—Ethan was jealous enough.

I refused to discuss the news about my dad. I wasn’t ready to pick open that fresh wound on top of the others I was tearing apart. When I was done, I stopped pacing and cracked open the window for some much-needed air. I was flushed with anger and exhausted from reliving the emotional memories. Telling him brought it all back in its crushing, heartrending glory.

Ethan stood and cupped my face, his expression shattered. “Don’t you
ever
put yourself at risk like this for me again, Nara. I’m not worth it!”

I clasped his hands, pulling them down. “Didn’t you hear me? Yes, this started out about you, but we’re connected, Ethan. Somehow, all this raven stuff…I was
supposed
to find that book, my necklace unlocked its secret. Freddie knew I was the one, knew it in his heart.” Tears surfaced when I thought of Freddie. “And now he’s gone because I thought the book wasn’t meant for me.”

Ethan pulled me close and his hand trembled as he pressed my head to his shoulder. “That Drake bastard could’ve done to you what he did to Freddie, Nara!”

I snorted a half laugh. “That’s what Drystan said.”

Ethan stiffened. “I’ll give the guy that. He’s right. As much as I hate to admit it, I owe him for being there for you.”

I pulled back slightly and mimicked Drystan’s accent. “He’s actually a right nice bloke once you get to know him.”

“I hate his accent!” Ethan bit out, his face darkening.

I’d tried to lighten the mood, but my comment about Drystan was probably pushing it. I laid my hands on his chest and had to stand on my toes to press a light kiss to his lips. “You must’ve grown a couple of inches while you were gone,” I teased, trying to distract his thoughts from Drystan. Touching his hair, I continued, “I like your haircut. Now I can always see what you’re thinking.”

With a grim look, Ethan stepped back and sat down in the chair. He rested his forearms on his thighs, then hung his head, saying in a low voice, “What I’m thinking is that I’m not worth your love, Nara. I’m not worth all the effort you went to, the danger you put yourself in for this journal.” He paused, flicking his hand to indicate the leather book on my bed. “I don’t deserve this.”

“Why aren’t you worth the effort?”
Had things gone south with his parents?

“I
am
dark, Nara. I live in the darkness.”

“Is this about Drake? About what you did to him?”

Ethan stilled and jerked his gaze to mine, worry swirling in the blue depths. “What did you see?”

“What didn’t I see?” I spread my hands wide. “Tonight I saw your eyes turn black as coal, more than once. I witnessed you throw an evil guy across the room like a rag doll, then jam a sword into him that expelled a yellow smoky mist out of his body before disintegrating him into nothing but dust. I saw it all, Ethan, and…” I paused and thought of how Drake had viciously defiled Freddie. I raised my chin a notch. “I’m not sad he’s gone.”

Ethan blinked a couple of times. “You saw the yellow smoke leave him?”

He sounded shocked. When I slowly nodded, he whispered, “But no one else can see it.”

As much as I wanted to drill him with my own questions, his comment reminded me that I had something I wanted to show him. “Hold that thought,” I said, then walked over to my desk to turn on my laptop. I sat on my bed and set the laptop on my knees, facing it toward him. “Watch this.”

Ethan watched the video I played with a steady gaze. His expression was so hard to read, I couldn’t tell if he saw what I had. When it was over, I shut my laptop, then returned it to my desk. Turning to face him across the room, I asked, “What did you see? What caused the airplane to crash?”

He looked at me for a couple of seconds, then simply said, “A ripple rolled across the sky. When the wave shot up right in front of the plane, the disturbance tore its wing off. That’s what caused the plane crash.”

I waved my arms in relief. “Thank God someone else sees it!”

Ethan’s brow furrowed. “No one else could see that?”

I shook my head. “Not that I know of. That video was taken when I was a little girl. Remember that necklace my grandmother gave me, the one that opened the secret closure on Freddie’s raven book?” When he nodded, I continued. “That was the day I’d looked up and pointed to empty blue sky
before
the plane crashed. Right after the plane hit the water, a stranger walked up, spoke to me, and then gave my grandmother that necklace.”

Ethan shook his head, intrigued. “You must’ve seen the ripple back then.”

I nodded. “That’s my guess, yes. Realizing that made me feel better, because I’d seen something similar happen not that long ago on Highway 29. The sky split open, and this whirling dervish of hands, claws, feathers and scales came barreling through, surrounded by a cloud of smoke. The rift caused a car to wreck but when the ‘ball of beings’ landed on the car, they vanished. Poof. Just like that, as if they were never there in the first place.” I squinted, then asked with a hopeful voice, “Have you seen anything like this?”