Loving the White Liar (8 page)

“How about Wednesday?” he whispered as he tapped his lips against mine one last time, easing us out of the fog. I nodded in response.

“Goodnight, Jayden, and thank you for dinner. So good...all of it.” His dazzling smile muted me as I tore myself away, but not before memorizing his features, and tucking them away.

“Night.”

I spent the next day organizing my life. I paid all the bills I could afford to, cleaned my apartment to white glove inspection worthy, and even managed to spend a few hours organizing my closet. Something inside me knew things were about to change for the better, and in a way I was preparing myself for it. In less than a week, I would be starting a new job that I was excited about. With the toss of the shoebox full of old boyfriend memorabilia in the trash, I knew with that gesture I was ridding myself of my baggage. I would keep my scars—I’d earned them—but I didn’t need a ten year old ticket stub to remember them.

Gerri came home from the lunch shift and plopped herself on my bed as I continued to throw piles on the floor outside my closet that I intended to discard.

“What’s with the nesting? And why is the house so damned clean? Is your mother coming?”

“I decided to get rid of a few things, and no, I just felt like it.” Stepping into my closet, I discreetly lidded my NSYNC memorabilia and tucked it away from Gerri’s view. No one needed to know I had my first orgasm thinking of Justin Timberlake in the
Gone
video, or that I had gone to see them twelve times in concert, some of them back to back, if I begged my mother enough to drive to the neighboring cities. My box was all I had left out of thousands of dollars’ worth of memorabilia I’d collected. And I wasn’t parting with it,
ever.

She gave me a sideways glance as I braved a look at her. I wasn’t the world’s tidiest roommate. Gerri actually had me beat in that department. She often bitched about the large amount of auburn hair that was embedded in the bathroom floor, and my lack of shared garbage duty.

“Well, it looks awesome,” she said, picking a shirt up out of my discard pile and tucking it at her side.

“Sooooo,” I said with big eyes. “Are you going to make me beat it out of you?”

She shot up on the bed and started bouncing excitedly. “I know I shouldn’t have slept with him so soon, so before you start preachin’—”

“No way, I swear. I must have been a real bitch to you when it came to him and for that I’m sorry. No judgment and tell me everything. But before you do, I have a confession.”

“Yeah?” she said with a sweet smile.

“I kind of was excited about my first date with Jayden and walked in on the two of you. He’s got an amazing ass, but that’s all I saw, I swear.”

Her eyes bulged a bit before she burst out laughing. “No wonder you were scarred!”

“Yeah, if I hadn’t just had a full on session with Jayden, it would have been a hell of a lot worse.”

“You like him, huh?” she said, smiling.

“God, he’s awesome...so beautiful, smart, and funny. I could kiss him forever.” I sat down next to her on the bed. “But you go first.”

“He’s...God, it’s so much better than I thought. It wasn’t just the sex, but let me tell you he has that covered. That man is nothing short of a sinner in the sack. I can’t even believe how beautiful his body is and he knows how to work it.” She looked down at her hands. “I haven’t heard from him since, though.”

I looked at her and inwardly groaned.

“Seriously, though, Hil, if he doesn’t call, I don’t think I will be as crushed as I thought I would be. I’ve been thinking about it and the truth is, I don’t think I could ever get hurt like I was with Blake again. It’s just not possible. Mike’s awesome, don’t get me wrong, and I still want him...but...” I looked up at her large blue eyes that told me she meant what she was saying, “with Mike, I think I was kind of playing with fire on purpose.”

I sighed as I wrapped my arm around her. “Why?”

“I don’t know,” she said, the irritation with herself evident. “Maybe to play the bad guy for once, you know, to be in the shoes of the other woman or something. I can’t say I would have turned him down if he was still with his girlfriend.”

“Gerri—”

“I know it’s fucked up, all right. It makes me sick just thinking about it now. Seriously, I’m glad it didn’t go down that way.”

“You can tell me anything, you know that,” I encouraged.

“I know. It’s pretty disgusting, though, isn’t it?” She looked at me warily as I nudged her with my shoulder. “Saturday night I rode Jayden’s lap with my clothes
on
until I came, then went topless after practically throwing myself at him. I’m in no position to judge.”

She laughed as her eyes got bigger. “Wow, aren’t we a bunch of horny hoes?”

“Right,” I agreed.

“Well, I’m starving. Do you want some food?”

“Take a twenty, order pizza.”

“I’ve got this covered and I stuck a few hundred in your wallet. I had a good couple of days. I promise I’ll do better.”

“No you won’t,” I said, perking up with my next set of news. “But I got a better job. Actually, Jayden found it for me. As of Monday, you are looking at a travel agent.”

“You are shitting me!” I nodded. “Wow, this guy sounds amazing!”

“He really is so far. I’m seeing him tomorrow. And if that asshole doesn’t call you, Jayden’s friends are hot.” I saw a small amount of sadness as I mentioned Mike. “He’ll call, babe.”

“And I’ll live if he doesn’t. I think I needed to know that more.” I agreed whole-heartedly. Gerri ordered pizza as I finished my closet and we spent the rest of the night sipping cheap but delicious Ruinite Lambrusco and playing cards. As if on cue, both of our phones went off. I looked to Gerri who was already smiling. He’d called. I didn’t realize I was holding my breath for her until I saw her walking down the hall, the phone at her ear as she said “hi.”

I looked down at mine.

Jayden: Hey.

Me: Hey back.

Jayden: I’ll pick you up tomorrow around six.

Me: Okay. How was your day?

Jayden: Shit. Better now.

Me: Want to talk about it?

Jayden: Not really. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?

Me: Anything I can do?

Jayden: Nothing that won’t compromise my virtue.

Me: Wouldn’t want that.

Jayden: I would love a taste of your mouth.

Me: I’m just a door knock away.

Jayden: Don’t tempt me.

Me: It’s my job.

Jayden: I have to handle my roommate. See you tomorrow.

Me: That doesn’t sound good. Hope it gets better. See you then. X

Jayden: You’re good for me. Night, beautiful.

I stared at my phone in complete agreement that the same was true for me. And that night as I dressed for bed, I walked into the bathroom, noting my reflection was all teeth and gums. If my mother could measure this smile, I was pretty sure I would get her stamp of approval on Jayden.

Standing at the helm of the grocery cart with Jayden in front of me, I was completely undecided on what to cook. I’d offered several times to whip something up, but he insisted on cooking for me again. I kept my amusement to myself over his confusion as it weighed heavy over his features. Staring at his perfect ass in his snug fitting jeans, I imagined for the hundredth time what it would feel like to be beneath him. Today he wore a simple, gray, V-neck t-shirt and I noted the words on the back of his right bicep that read, “In the end the love you take is equal to the love you make.”

A chest tug alerted me to the fact that I was completely enamored by him. He looked at me then and must have seen something in my expression because he smiled before asking under his breath, “How long would you hold it against me if I called my mother now and asked her a question?”

“I can’t help?” I pushed out through a laugh.

“Forget it,” he said, throwing a package of tenderloin he’d been studying for five minutes into the cart.

“Jay, call her. I don’t care really. I do it all the time.”

“Cool.” He smiled as he grabbed his phone. I motioned that I would be an aisle over, and he nodded then started the conversation with his mother. I left him to it. Clearly, he had something particular in mind, and who was I to criticize since the last thing he cooked me was now a craving?

I made a mental note to raid his mother’s recipe box if I was ever in the position to.

I spent a few minutes picking out things for my apartment when I felt Jayden encase me in his arms, his hands on the cart on top of mine. He began walking us forward, mimicking my steps so we stayed close.

“Miss me?”

“That and I really don’t want any other man here seeing your ass in those jeans. You are definitely a woman to be jealous over.” My sighing heart fluttered around in my chest, reminding me how good it felt to be coveted. His smell surrounded me as I leaned into him.

“I love that line,” I said, turning to the side to kiss his cheek.

“Monroe original,” he said, slipping his arms around my middle before he squeezed me briefly before letting go.

Monroe. I chuckled. Great, if I married this guy, my initials would be H. A. M. Hilary Amanda Monroe.

“What’s so funny?” he asked, his lips still close to my ear.

“Nothing,” I said, surprised I was even thinking about trivial shit like that. I’d just learned his last name and I was already picking out a china pattern.

Get a grip, Hilary.

I felt the loss of him as he busied himself shopping for the rest of his ingredients.

Back at his apartment, he set up an electric fondue pot on his coffee table and opened a bottle of wine.

“You like fondue?”

“God, yes, I love it. But you have to let me help you prep.” He seemed to think about it for a long moment before saying, “I guess that would be okay.”

“Really, Jayden, that much deliberation on a little help?” I poked as he looked at me in all seriousness.

“I’m particular about a lot of things.”

“I can see that,” I said with amusement as he poured us each a glass of wine.

I busied myself slicing vegetables for the skewers as he prepped the filet for the fondue pot. I caught him looking over my shoulder a couple of times and looked at him in puzzlement when he lingered over me a little longer than necessary.

“Something I can help you with, Jayden?”

“Like this,” he said, scooping up a mushroom and pulling the stem off. I looked at the pile of mushrooms I’d already cleaned then back at him.