Loving Mr. Daniels (36 page)

“You have the same eyes,” I said. He looked up, confused. “As Daniel. You both have the same eyes.”

He wiped his hands under his nose and sniffled. “We get them from our dad.” Pulling himself to a standing position, he paused. “Why aren’t you calling the cops?”

“You’re not a child, Jace. If you think you did something wrong, then it should be your responsibility to turn yourself in.” I slightly smirked. “Plus, I’m having a really crappy day, so…”

He laughed and nodded. “I’m sorry. About all of this.” His blue eyes filled with tears. “I’m so fucking sorry.”

“Yeah. Me too.” My mind danced with something I wasn’t sure I should tell him, but I knew he needed to hear it. “There weren’t any drugs”—I shifted my weight from one leg to the other—“in his system. Ryan drove the car into the tree fully aware of what he was doing.”

“It wasn’t my fault?” he breathed out, resting his hands on top of his hair.

I shook my head back and forth.

A strained smile plastered on his face and he started to turn around. I saw one single tear roll down his cheek as he jammed his hands in his jeans pockets. I knew he didn’t mean for me to hear his next comment. He was speaking to himself, but I did overhear.

“I’ll get clean. I really will this time…” As lightly as the wind blew, his last words left his lips and floated away toward the clouds. “I just wanted back into the band. Maybe he’ll let me back in.”

If there were a heaven, I hoped Jace’s words flew toward its path.

And if there were a God, I hoped he was listening.

Goodbyes hurt most when they’re one-sided.

~ Romeo’s Quest

It had been a long day.

At the cemetery, I stood next to Ryan’s mom, who was breaking down. Henry held her left hand, and I took her right. I knew she didn’t know me other than my being the guy who’d taught her son, but she squeezed my hand back.

“Thank you,” she whispered.

My eyes moved back to Ashlyn, who had her arms wrapped around Hailey. She gave me a weak smile, and I frowned.

What if I was ruining her life by loving her? What if, somehow, I was putting her in danger? Jace was dangerous, and the people he dealt were even more of a risk.

I knew it was a stupid thought, but death was becoming too common in my life. I wasn’t sure how much more I could handle. Especially if something happened to Ashlyn.

Did Jace give Ryan those drugs? Would Ryan have been alive if I’d turned down the offer of letting them stay the night? He would’ve been alive right now if I weren’t dating my student.

Guilt was treacherous.

And it was filling my head with all the reasons why I shouldn’t love Ashlyn.

I hadn’t seen Ashlyn in four days. It was the longest we’d ever gone without seeing one another. I’d been sitting in my Jeep parked outside the library for the past fifteen minutes. The sky was drunk on blackness, and snow was falling at a steady pace. Under the street lights, I saw her walking toward me, a large paper bag in her arms.

She’d told Henry she would be spending the night at a friend’s house, promising to check in with him every hour. Which meant I had her for at least fifteen hours. The way the lights lit her up and the snow danced against her face made me think why someday everything would work out.

Because I needed it to work out with Ashlyn Jennings. After she graduated this coming June, I would love her out loud—the way she deserved to be loved. We would deal with college when college came, but not a day before.

Yeah, guilt was harsh, but hope was just as powerful a weapon.

She opened the passenger’s door and climbed in, setting the bag in her lap.

“What do ya got there?” I asked.

Her head shook back and forth. “Kiss first, questions later.”

I leaned in, held my mouth against hers, and smirked as her tongue escaped and she ran it against my bottom lip. “What’s in the bag?” I repeated.

“My treasure chest with the letters from Gabby. And Jack, Jose, and Morgan,” she replied. “We’re getting drunk tonight and opening letters.”

Laughing at her response, I rolled my eyes. “No, really. What’s in the bag?” She arched an eyebrow and tilted it toward me. A shitload of alcohol and letters. “I don’t think tonight is the right night for this, sweets.” Her eyelids were so heavy from lack of sleep. “Plus, you don’t drink.”

She smiled. “No, I don’t.” Her hand slipped into the bag and she pulled out a letter. “But number eight requires it.”

“Ashlyn…” I warned, not wanting her to drown herself in alcohol. She hadn’t really dealt with Ryan’s death yet, and I feared that one day she would just snap.

“Daniel. Fun. Remember that? Let’s just have fun tonight, okay?”

I breathed out and nodded. “Okay.” I narrowed my eyes and leaned in her direction. “Come here.”

She inched her body closer to me. My eyes fell to her lips. I placed my hand on her lower back, pulling her closer. She exhaled as I ran my finger
slowly
around her top lip and
slowly
around her bottom lip. She parted her mouth and
slowly
licked my finger before she sucked on it gently. My hand cupped around the back of her neck and I pulled my mouth to hers.

We stared into one another’s eyes, my heart pounding against my chest. “I love you.”

“I love you,” she breathed against me, sending the words into my entire being. Her back arched against my touch, and I tugged on her bottom lip. She sighed, repeating herself. “I love you, I love you, I love you.” 

When we pulled up to the lake house, I saw that the living room lights were on. Then I saw two women walking back and forth in their bras.
Shit.
I glanced over to Ashlyn, who of course had noticed the bodies, too. Her face turned to me with a smirk.

“There are naked women in your house.”

I sighed when I saw a shirtless Randy come into view through the window. My fingers rubbed against my forehead. “There are indeed naked women in my house.”

She had a smart-ass smile glued to her face. “Is this a…normal thing that happens at Mr. Daniels’s house?”

I formed a fist and bit the side of my hand. My eyes closed tight. “No! No…it’s just… Well, in the past, Randy used to try to make me feel better by…”

“By…?”

“By having naked music parties.”

Silence. I didn’t want to open my eyes to see her reaction. A loud giggle was heard. I peeked my eyes opened to find Ashlyn cracking up in laughter. “
Naked music parties
? Oh my gosh!
You’re a freak
!” She was laughing so hard that tears were streaming down her cheek.

“What?! No! Randy’s the freak! I was just a guy…in a room…with naked girls.” I put the car in reverse and turned to back away from the house. Ashlyn’s hand rested on my arm.

“Don’t you dare!” she hissed. “We are going to a naked music party!”

“We are not!” I argued. She set the paper bag on the ground in front of her. Her fingers slowly started unbuttoning her coat. “Ashlyn…” I muttered, watching her movements.

“Put the car in park,” she instructed.

“No,” I said, but I did the opposite. The car went into park.

Of course the car went into park. Because when a beautiful girl started undressing in your vehicle, you put the damn car in park. I shut up as I watched her remove her coat. Her hands wrapped under the hem of her sweater and she started to pull it over her head.

“‘
Are
you sure that we are awake? It seems to me that yet we sleep, we dream.’
” She was quoting A Midsummer Night’s Dream as her sweater found its placement in my back seat.

Her fingers started at the top of her neck and she caressed her body as she moved her fingers down her neck, across her cleavage and to her bra. Her eyes closed and I watched as she touched herself in front of me, her mouth parting in excitement.

“You’re killing me, Ashlyn,” I muttered, watching, feeling myself harden as I watched.

She leaned her seat back, lying backwards. Her hands were still running against her body. I watched her deep inhales and heavy exhales. “‘
Up and down, up and down. I will lead them up and down
…’” she quoted. Her fingers moved down her chest, traveling toward her belly button. She turned her head in my direction and she smiled easily with closed eyes. Her fingers started unbuttoning her jeans. “‘
I am feared in field in town
—’”

A growl rolled through me and my hands landed on top of hers. Her green eyes shot open and her mouth parted at seeing my eyes filled with need. My hands unzipped her jeans and I pulled them down a bit. Slightly teasing the skin above her panties, I listened to her moan.

“‘
Goblin, lead them up
,’” I started to finish her quote. My fingers traced up to her bra, grazing over her hardened nipples. Her hands flew over her head and she gripped the headrest behind her. With quickening breaths, her excitement deepened. Sliding my fingers down her skin, my hand slid into her panties and I listened to her burst with pleasure as I whispered against her ear, “‘
And down
.’”

I had no need to enter my house. If I never saw another woman’s naked body again, I would be fine as long as this one was mine.

So we didn’t enter the house at all that night.

But there was indeed a naked music party for two.