Loving Mr. Daniels (24 page)

I laughed out loud at her comment, wishing she were lying naked next to me in my bed. I wouldn’t even have to do anything with that naked body except hold it. I loved the way she felt against me.

Me:
I’ll stop once you quit petting baby pandas.

Ashlyn:
I thought you liked when I pet your baby panda?

I cringed.

Me:
There’s nothing baby about this panda.

Ashlyn:
I just LOLed. You’re such a dork.

Me:
Text me something you wrote tonight. Something from your book?

There was a long pause. Either she was typing me an excerpt or she had fallen asleep.

Ashlyn:
He never stepped in to fight her battles. Most women might have been turned off by the ungentlemanly action, yet it only turned Julie on that much more. She loved the way he allowed her to be strong for herself. She loved the way he believed she had the strength of all of the Goddesses combined. She loved the way he allowed her to be a hundred percent individual. That is precisely why she wanted to love him for the rest of time.

I read her words over and over again. Taking in each one. 

Me:
My father would’ve been right. I’m not good enough for you.

Ashlyn:
I think you’re just right for me.

Me:
Is this the book Gabby and you were working on?

Ashlyn:
No. I started something new.

She was finding herself, too. It was the most beautiful thing to watch happen—Ashlyn discovering who she was again all on her own. I felt privileged to be able to witness her growth.

Ashlyn:
Henry walked into my room and stared at me for the longest… What did you say to him?

I smiled at the message and rubbed my fingers against my brows.

Me:
I asked how he was doing. Maybe you should, too. Goodnight, sweets.

Ashlyn:
Goodnight :)

I rolled over and began to read the letter I’d received tonight from Gabby. I knew the letter was supposed to bring me comfort, but for some reason, it only brought on doubts.

#1. Fall in love.

To the boy who’s loved by a girl,

I wonder if you know how lucky you are. My little sister here doesn’t know it, but she puts up walls. Her heart is locked and chained shut from the world. She hides behind her books, and she doesn’t let anyone in. I figure it’s because once our dad left, she never wanted to feel that way again—abandoned.

But here you are. Someone who found the key.

Can you do me a few favors?

Show her off to the world. Shout it from the rooftops. Take her out on dates. She loves to dance—even though she’s really bad at it. Make other couples jealous.

Be her golden.

Because I promise you that she’ll be yours.

You’re doing great.

-Gabrielle

Since I read Gabby’s note, I’d felt terrible. Ashlyn’s sister was right. She deserved to be shown off and she deserved to go out on dates. She deserved to be loved out loud.

And I didn’t know how to do that.

Don’t stop until we’re done.

Then run off the tracks.

Never look back, never look back.

~ Romeo’s Quest

“Do you always walk around cemeteries alone?” I snickered, seeing Daniel.

He turned to look at me and smiled wide. “Only when I’m waiting to see a pretty girl.”

I rolled my eyes. “You’re corny.” He pulled me closer to him and slowly licked my bottom lip before he kissed me. “Mmm,” I muttered against his mouth. I cleared my throat. “Jake from school sent me a text asking me out again,” I whispered, biting my bottom lip.

Daniel arched an eyebrow. “The guy can’t catch a hint, can he?” He paused and lowered his voice. “Do you want to date him?”

I stepped backwards. “What?”

“I mean…he can actually
date
you, Ashlyn. This isn’t right—meeting behind buildings, in cemeteries—”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” My eyes watered up. Why would he say such things? I was happy with him.
We
were happy.  The only thing I could think of that could have brought on the change in Daniel was the note I’d given him last night.

I shouldn’t have given him the note. I’d come on too strong. I’d been too forward.

He grew grim for a moment, deep in thought. I hated how I couldn’t read him. His eyes blinked and he looked up.

My eyes shifted to the ground. “Is it because of what the note said? Because I-I’m sorry if it’s too soon but—”

“No, Ash…” His face softened, all evidence of his sudden mood change gone. “It’s nothing. Forget about it. Anyway, why did you bring it up? Jake texting you?”

I contemplated asking him about his thoughts, but I feared he would push himself away from me. Breathing deeply, I tried to clear the fog between us. “I know I can’t say I’m seeing you…but maybe…” I pulled my hair to the side and held my neck out. “Maybe you can leave a mark saying that I’m yours?”

He snickered. “You want me to give you a hickey?” I nodded. He sighed. “But that’s so...”

“High school-ish?” I laughed. “Don’t forget, baby. Your girlfriend’s still a senior.”

“Mmm…girlfriend. I like the sound of that.” Daniel moved his mouth to my neck and slowly began to suck on my skin, teasing me. His tongue flicked back and forth slowly and then rapidly, his sucking becoming more intense. I arched my neck in his direction, holding my hands against his hips. When he pulled away, I felt a light kiss on my neck. “I guess that makes you mine.”

My head shook back and forth. “I was yours before we ever met.”

“That awkward moment when you find people making out in front of your parents’ graves.”

My heart jumped out of my skin as I heard another voice hovering over us. I was quick to step back from Daniel in fright. His eyes moved to the guy standing near us, and I gasped.

I could’ve been looking at Daniel if I hadn’t known better. The only differences were that this guy had buzzed hair and his blue eyes were a lot colder. A lot more lost.

“What are you doing here?” Daniel asked. His eyes were filled with a look I’d never seen from him. Hate? Love? Could someone hate and love at the same exact time?

“Well, I’m in town and thought I would come say hi to Mom and Dad. I would ask you what you were doing here but…” He stared at me with a smirk, and I curled my arms around my waist. “I think it’s pretty clear.”

Daniel’s eyes moved to me and then back to his…brother? I felt my face flushing over. How long had he been standing there?

“I’m glad you found yourself a girl. She’s cute,” the stranger said. “It probably makes it easier for you to sleep at night, eh?”

“Go home, Ashlyn,” Daniel demanded.

I looked at him, confused. Why was I being sent away? “Wh-what? Wait—”

“
Now
.” The word was stern and hurtful.

I was instantly worried by the way he’d spoken toward me. He’d never seemed so harsh, so distance—even when he’d found out I was his student. I felt my heart jump, and Daniel’s eyes softened when he stared into my greens.

I stepped toward him to try to comfort his sudden shift in personality, but he only stepped away from me.

That hurt. 

I turned to the guy who was sporting a sly smile my way. Gabby was standing behind the two guys, playing her guitar, singing the Beatles
Let It Be
. I frowned at her, silently begging her to help me understand what was happening.

Then she was gone.

Because she’d never really been there.

After an eternity of doubts and indecisions, I left, giving them both a wordless goodbye and feeling empty inside.

I waited until I reached the outside of the cemetery to start crying. I hated how much I cried this past year. I was supposed to be stronger. 

I rushed back to Henry’s home and darted straight for my bedroom. I tried not to overthink things. He would text me. He would explain. Hailey was in the shower, so I was fine to cry alone in my bed. I pulled out my cell phone and waited for his text.