Loving Justice (El Camino Real Book 2) (4 page)

Desperate to be alone, Charlee ducked into the church and sat down on the back pew. Everyone was gone except the attendants moving the flower arrangements from the front of the church to the vans waiting to take them to the cemetery. She bowed her head so they wouldn’t notice her. As quietly as she could she sobbed, her shoulders moving with each wrenching breath. Over and over again, she replayed the words Justice had said. He’d done nothing important last night.
Nothing important
.

Her stomach was rolling in sick realization of what he must be thinking. Or was he just too drunk to remember what they’d shared—the kisses, the touches, the way she’d clung to him, how she’d whispered his name when she came.
Nothing important
. With those words, he’d ripped part of her soul from its moorings.

How long she sat there, she didn’t know. When she rose, it was daylight no longer. The truth was sad. She was nobody. She was nothing. Nobody wanted her. Curtiss Parker, her adopted father, didn’t want her. Justice didn’t want her either. If she found her real mother, how would she feel? Had she not wanted her either or had she been too young to keep her? The question was eating her alive.

Not knowing what else to do, Charlee returned to the clinic. Still crying, she fought back the anger and the pain. Realization of the stupid mistake she’d made with Justice was pounding in her head like a drum. Clutching her arms around her waist, Charlee walked through the yard. Her feet were sore, she had blisters on the back of her heels because she hadn’t stopped to put on hose this morning.

The house was dark, her father was gone. If he was hitting her again, he was probably drinking again also. Panicking a little at the thought, Charlee wanted to leave, she had to leave. There was nothing for her here. She couldn’t live in the same house as her father anymore. Now was her chance for a fresh start. Should she just go to the bus stop and buy a random ticket? Or should she try to find something—anything—about her past?

Switching on the lights, Charlee boldly walked into his office. The old bastard kept everything. If something existed that could give her a clue to who she was and where she’d come from, Curtiss Parker would have a copy of it. Methodically, she started going through files, drawers, file cabinets, and the desk. She wasn’t neat about it either. Without care, she tossed things to the left and to the right. Let him clean it up for a change. “Please, please, please,” she chanted until she finally found a file with her name on it. It was stuffed behind a drawer, bent and stained. Still, it was the most beautiful thing she’d ever seen. With shaking hands, she plopped down at the desk and opened it up.

Quickly, she read, then she reread and reread again. Mother, Dawn Cortez. Father, Santino Cortez. The address was Pine Ridge Reservation, South Dakota. The lawyer’s name was Pete Sheldon and there was a phone number. And the baby’s name—her name—was Cha’risa Cortez. Cha’risa. Keeping her eyes on the paper, her heart rate through the roof, she fumbled for the phone and placed the call.

One ring, two, three.

“Shepherd and Associates, may I help you?”

“Ah, hello. This is Charlee Parker, uh, Cha’risa Cortez, I guess. You handled my adoption. I found the information, and I need to talk to you. I want to know if my real parents would have any interest in meeting me.”

*  *  *

Charlee offered no explanations to Curtiss Parker. She kept her door locked and stayed out of his way. A young lawyer by the name of Hampton Forbes drove down from Dallas and met with her at his motel room. He verified her identity, then explained everything as best he could. To Charlee’s surprise, Mr. Forbes had been kind.

Now, she was packing. Hampton was coming after her. He’d explained that Pete Sheldon was dead. His practice had been acquired by Hampton’s firm, Shepherd and Associates, and what Charlee/Cha’risa learned literally blew her mind. Her father was dead, but her mother was still alive. She’d been wrenched from her home while her mother had begged on her hands and knees to keep her.

“Shepherd and Associates has learned of illegal and shameful practices in the area of adoption committed by Pete Sheldon.” She had listened, comprehending most of what he said. The shock was so great, Charlee had a hard time thinking. But one truth stood out loud and clear. She’d been wanted.

What was most disturbing was the idea that people could manipulate others out of greed. The government paid a set fee to parents willing to foster a child, but they received double for a child with Native American blood. This bonus was too great of a temptation for some unscrupulous people who saw an opportunity to cash in on other’s problems. And if they couldn’t fill their foster homes and orphanages with children who were actually without parents and homes, then they created the illusion of that need, trumping up false charges and accusations against innocent, honest parents and stealing their children from their very arms.

This had happened to Charlee. When she learned the truth, she cried.

All of these years, she could have been in a home with a mother who loved her and wanted her. Instead, she’d lived with a man who despised her, blamed her for his wife’s death and hit her if she got in his way.

The only bright spot in her world had been Justice, and now that was ruined. Her cell phone had rang twice. She hadn’t answered. Charlee had left her phone in her room. She didn’t bring it with her. Hampton Forbes was going to drive her to Lakota, South Dakota to meet her mother.

And as far as she knew, she was never coming back.

*  *  *

Justice was going around in a daze. His head hurt so badly, he couldn’t see. He’d awoken three days ago in a cloud of agony. The drugs he had to take would mask the pain for a little while, but it always came roaring back. These bouts weren’t normal headaches that lasted an hour, they could plague him for days or weeks if it was a particularly bad episode.

Damn, he’d drank too much after Abby’s surgery and everything after that had been a blur. Sipping a glass of water, he tried to read the instructions on the prescription bottle. This medicine made him as hazy as alcohol. God! He hated how weak this shit left him.

And what the hell was up with Charlee? He’d never seen her act like that. Oh, they’d had childish spats before, but this was different. She’d said she never wanted to see him again. He’d called her several times, no answer. When he’d ran into her at the diner, he hadn’t been thinking straight. He’d been forced to meet Toby and Zelda to sign some stupid release form so she could use his name and photo in a magazine article being written about her. Zelda was some hotshot model in Dallas and apparently she and anyone from her past was ‘newsworthy.’

This just wasn’t like Charlee. He knew they hadn’t really hung out in a while, but she was in college and he was working full time. They would always be friends. Yea, he knew she’d had a little crush on him once and he hadn’t wanted to hurt her. So, he’d given her some space. But that was behind them. Today, he just needed to talk—hell, he needed her.

Charlee was still the one person he thought of when he needed someone. And the events of the past few days had taken their toll. He’d gone back to Austin and visited Abby. She was still adamant that none of the family except for him and his folks could know how badly she was burned. The idea of what she’d told him haunted Justice like nothing had in a long time. Men just shouldn’t know those type of things. All he could do was hold Abby while she cried, saying she was ruined. She thought where she was burned would keep her from marrying, having a husband or a lover. Justice said she was wrong. He knew if someone he loved was hurt, all he would want to do was help and love them. Because of all this female anguish, he needed Charlee. She always listened. She always made him feel better.

So, where the hell was she?

Determined to get to the bottom of things, Justice drove over to the clinic, thinking she might be sick and unable to talk on the phone. But when he’d pulled up in front of the white bungalow, what he’d seen astonished him. Charlee was not only in the car with another man, she was driving away with him! A man he didn’t know. Who was this ass? Was she going on a date? He met them, passed them slowly, and she never met his gaze—never once looked at him.

In the other car, Hampton Forbes stole a glance at the woman sitting beside him. She was something else, a little scrapper. And cute too. “You sure you want to do this?”

“Yes.” She nodded, then jerked her head up, eyes big. “She does want to see me, my mother, doesn’t she?”

“Of course.” Hampton assured her. “I was working down through his files. Your case was coming up. I would have been at your doorsteps in a few weeks anyway.”

“Were you the one who talked to her?” Charlee asked, uncertainty shading her voice.

“Yes, I have her number.” He held his phone out. “Want to give her a call?”

Her hand moved toward the phone at the same time her head was shaking ‘no.’ “I’m scared.”

“The hard part is over, Miss Parker-Cortez.” He grinned at her. “She’s waiting for you and she’s your mom. She loves you. Just because she hasn’t seen you for years doesn’t change that. There are some things and some people you can count on. Here.”

What Hampton said made Charlee’s stomach hurt. She felt divided. On one hand she was happy and grateful that she had this second chance with her mother. On the other hand, her heart ached because of Justice. Leaving Bronco was her, but right now Madison County wasn’t big enough for the both of them.

Hampton waved the phone in front of her. He was smiling. Charlee guessed he would be considered good-looking. “Oh, all right.” She made a funny face at him. “Did she call me Cha’risa?”

“No, they called you Charlee, the Parkers didn’t come up with that. Look in my contacts. Her name is there.”

Charlee felt so odd when she saw the words ‘Dawn Cortez.’ With a deep breath, she pressed the touch screen. As he watched, she slowly raised the cell to her ear. In a few seconds she heard a voice, a voice that struck a chord deep in her heart.

“Mom? This is Charlee.”

*  *  *

Life takes amazing twists and turns. In less than six weeks, Charlee’s life completely changed. Her mother was amazing. From the moment they met, it had been like coming home. Dawn Cortez had held out her arms, and Charlee had ran right into them. The small house where she lived on the reservation wasn’t fancy, but the moment Charlee walked through the door she felt warm. Dawn had done everything she could to make her feel welcome, and she found herself pouring her heart out to her mother about the Parkers and about Justice.

“Why don’t you call him?” she asked with a gentle smile.

Charlee set across from her at the dining table, picking at her food. Even though Dawn’s cooking was superb, lately she hadn’t had much of an appetite. Lifting her eyes, she met her mother’s gaze. In many ways it was like looking in a mirror. “I’ve thought about it.” She twisted her napkin. “I just don’t know what to say.”

She placed her hand over Charlee’s. A wise and gentle smile on her face. “You two have a lot to say to one another. Talk about your past. Talk about your friendship. Most importantly, tell him you’re pregnant.”

Charlee’s fork froze midway to her mouth. “Pregnant?” She dropped the fork. Unparalleled joy, overwhelming doubt, and paralyzing fear stole her breath. So much had happened, she’d pushed the possibility from her mind. Still, the loss of appetite and twinges of nausea seemed to fit. “Oh, my God,” she whispered.

What was he going to do?

For a short time, Charlee rode a rollercoaster of emotions. Her mother’s intuition and observation proved to be correct. There were unforeseen repercussions from the night she’d spent with Justice. A baby. At first she’d been angry. But that had quickly changed. She was carrying the child of the man she adored. Placing her hands over her belly, Charlee held it as close to her heart as she could. Her happiness built until she was consumed, thrilled. She might never have Justice, but she would have a part of him with her forever.

She and her mother would sit up and talk for hours, laughing and planning. Charlee took a job at the local Dairy Queen. It wasn’t much, but it helped. She realized she’d have to make other plans. After all, she had a baby to support. But right now she was just basking in the reunion with her mother and the knowledge that she was going to be a mother herself. The only cloud on her horizon was the longing she felt for her best friend, the man she loved—for Justice. Once she’d even phoned him. Charlee had been at the grocery store and saw a prepaid cell phone and couldn’t resist. She’d let it ring four times before she’d hung up. It was probably for the best. Now wasn’t the time. Charlee didn’t plan on being gone forever. She had time to reach out, to tell him about the baby.

And then the unthinkable happened. Everything began to fall apart. Dawn began having stomach pains so severe she could no longer hide them from Charlee. When she convinced her mother to go to the doctor, his diagnosis was heart-wrenching. The parent she’d just found was diagnosed with cancer. She only had months to live.

Maybe it was the stress, maybe there was something else wrong, or maybe it just wasn’t meant to be, but a few days after she buried her mother, Charlee lost her baby.  

She was alone once more.