Love's Destiny (Love Trilogy #2) (18 page)

I went into the building and stopped at the security desk. I gave them my name and they called up to her room a moment later they were passing me through to the elevators. I walked to her door and knocked softly. She opened it immediately as if she’d been standing on the other side waiting.

Her eyes were wide and scared. She looked up at me with apprehension. Before thinking I stepped forward and pulled her against me. I held her softly and resisted the urge to kiss her. That wasn’t what she needed right now. She clung to me and I held her until I felt her breathing slow.

“He won’t bother you again.” I told her and her head jerked up to look at me.

“Tyler what did you do? Where did you go?” I saw the fear in her face and knew I’d done the right thing by leaving him.

“I had a talk with him.” I smiled to hide my anger. “He won’t bother you again.” I repeated.

“Oh Tyler. You didn’t have to. It was my fault. I didn’t want to, but I couldn’t think straight. I didn’t realize what was happening.” She was trembling again as she rambled.

“Destiny, it was not your fault. Don’t ever say that. Don’t ever feel that.” I tilted her chin up so that she would look at me. “Do you understand me? It wasn’t your fault.” She nodded, her chin still in my hand. “And I did have to. I love you Destiny. He hurt you. I couldn’t let him get away with that.” I saw the tears fill her eyes before she buried her head against my chest again.

Keeping my arm around her I led her through the empty living room into her bedroom. We walked to the bed together in silence and then we both sat.

“Tyler.” She said pulling away so she could look up at me. I could see the apprehension in her eyes.

“Don’t.” I told her “Don’t push me away Destiny. Just let me hold you tonight.” She nodded again and slid back to lie down on the bed.

I lay next to her and pulled her into my arms, cradling her against me. Tomorrow I would be flying back to San Diego, but for tonight we had each other. I held her in my arms as we both drifted off to sleep.

The next morning I woke up in her bed alone. I could hear her in the other room and followed the sounds and the smell of coffee.

“I called Mom this morning and let her know that you fell asleep here last night. She was very worried, you’re probably going to get an earful when you get back.” She smiled at me as she handed me a cup of coffee.

“I figured as much.” I told her taking the coffee and smiling back.

“Thank you.” She said “For understanding, for being there for me. For being my friend.”

I didn’t realize that one word could hurt so much.

“I’ll always be your friend Destiny.” I told her

“I called you a cab, I was about to wake you. Your plane leaves in three hours.”

“Then I guess it’s time for me to go.” I said setting my cup down on the counter and grabbing my coat from the chair. Destiny walked me to the door.

“Tyler.” She said as I opened the door to leave. I looked down into her eyes. “I… I’ll miss you.”

In that moment of hesitation I saw something in her eyes, something that told me she wanted to say something else. But she wasn’t ready yet.

“I’ll miss you too.”

“The Marines!” I shouted into the phone “What do you mean Tyler joined the Marines?” I asked my mother

“He’s 18 Destiny.” She said calmly

“I know that!” I shouted infuriated. “But how could you let him do that?”

“It’s his decision. I can’t say that I’m thrilled about it either, but he’s an adult now and it was his decision to make. He’d already met with the recruiter before he even told us about it.” I could hear the sadness in my mother’s voice.

“Your father tried to talk him out of it, so did I, but his mind is made up. He starts boot camp this summer.”

“But why?” I cried sinking down to the floor cradling the receiver against my shoulder.

“I don’t know Destiny. We approached him about college several times, offered to pay his tuition anywhere he wanted to go. He’d been avoiding the conversation for the last couple months, and when your dad finally tried to press the issue with him he told us of his plans. He’s already signed up. There’s nothing we can do.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I don’t either Sweetheart, but he’s made up his mind. All we can do is support his decision now. He knows we will always be there for him. For anything he needs, but he wants to do this. We have to let him.” I could hear the resignation in my mother’s voice and knew she was right.

“When does he leave?” I asked feeling defeated.

“Two weeks.” I could hear the trembling in her voice and knew how hard this was for her. Tyler was like a son to her. And to me… a brother? A friend? Neither word seemed appropriate.

“But my classes aren’t out yet. I won’t be able to make it home before he leaves.”

“I know.”

“Will you tell him something for me?” I asked clinging desperately to the phone. “Tell him… I’ll miss him.”

“Of course. I’ll see you soon Sweetheart.”

“Bye, Mom.”

And that was it. I would be home in less than a month and Tyler wouldn’t be there. I had thought we’d have this summer together. After the short time we’d spent together over Christmas I hadn’t stopped thinking about the upcoming summer. About the feelings he had for me, about the feelings I finally realized I had for him. I thought we’d have the summer to work them out. To figure them out. But he would be gone before I got home. How long would it be before I saw him again?

My homecoming didn’t hold the joy that it would have if he’
d been there. The house seemed
empty without him. It was nice to be home again. To be with my family. But Tyler’s absence left an aching hole in my heart.

The summer months passed quickly and I returned to New York in the fall. I resumed my rigorous schedule and tried to move forward with my plans, with my life. It was funny how I’d been so afraid that he’d interfere with my plans for the future but his absence from my life now made those plans seem so hollow. I pursued them anyway.

Towards the end of my junior year Steven asked me out. He had been my student mentor on the Juilliard string quartet and now that he was graduating he finally felt it appropriate to express an interest he’d be harboring over the last year. I liked Steven, he was kind and patient. He was a good teacher and had helped me to develop my talent over the last year. He was tall and trim, with a lean build. He had pale blonde hair and a fair complexion with watery blue eyes. He had a very serene quality that drew me to him.

I saw no reason to refuse his invitation to dinner. I hadn’t spoken with Tyler in over a year, and although he maintained a spot in my heart and a place in my mind I knew I needed to allow my life to move forward. Steven was easy to be around. We both played the violin and shared many of the same interests. We never lacked for conversation and fell into an easy comfortable relationship quickly.

I decided not to return home that summer, instead I spent the summer with Steven at his apartment. We enjoyed each other’s company and shared a comfortable intimacy. He didn’t make my heart flutter but I knew that meant he also couldn’t break it. I felt safe with him and that was what I needed.

By the end of the summer he asked me to move in with him permanently. I couldn’t find any reason not to, I had spent the whole summer staying with him. Carrie, Craig and Josh were all living in an artist’s loft along with a few other dancers from their troupe. The dorms weren’t really home to me anymore.

Steven had a small apartment near the school so that it was easy for me to continue my classes. We practiced together on the weekends, he still took the role of mentor guiding and encouraging me. Our evenings were usually spent drinking wine and listening to classical music discussing the opportunities and struggles of finding work in New York. Our mornings were sedate, sharing coffee and watching the morning news shows.

I didn’t love him, but I was content with our life together. He was a gentle lover, but I wondered if I would ever again feel the passion Tyler had once aroused in me. Steven was not a passionate man, but he was a kind one.

I brought Steven home with me for Thanksgiving. My parents were glad to finally meet him and happy to have me home after my long absence. It was good to be home. I hadn’t realized how much I’d missed my parents and my brother until I was back with them and then I was overwhelmed with the homesickness I’d been ignoring for several months.

My family received Steven politely, but he remained on the outside never really involved in any of our conversations. He spent the weekend as a quiet observer, allowing me to enjoy the reunion with my family without any pressure to include him. At times I even forgot he was there.

I returned to New York after the holiday with the promise of coming back for Christmas. I wasn’t sure if Steven would come with me. He didn’t seem like he would mind coming or staying behind. Steven never really expressed any strong emotions about anything, he just simply flowed through life as a mild mannered observer. Content to just be.

The more time I spent with him, the more I realized that was not how I wanted to live my life. I needed passion; love, hate, anger, joy. I needed all of it. Steven couldn’t give that to me. He was simply content to hold my hand and discuss the local news. I needed more.

I decided it was best to leave him in New York when I flew home for Christmas. It would be a longer stay this time, and I didn’t want to feel pressure to include him or guilt for ignoring him. Not that he would make me feel either. He never made me feel anything. Nevertheless I wanted to enjoy my time with my family, and I knew it would be easier to do that alone.

It was dark when the taxi pulled up in front of the house. My parents weren’t expecting me until tomorrow, but I’d surprised them by catching an earlier flight. I felt giddy as I climbed out of the cab and walked to the door. I laughed when I realized that was the first strong emotion I’d felt in months.

That realization confirmed what I’d been suspecting since Thanksgiving, it was time to end my relationship with Steven. I hoped he wouldn’t be too disappointed, but that was something I could deal with when I returned to New York. I easily pushed him from my mind and opened the door.

I could hear voices coming from the living room and realized they hadn’t heard the front door. Enjoying the anticipation of their reaction I tiptoed through the foyer, slipping off my heels at the door so that they wouldn’t click against the marble floor. Just as I reached the entry way I stopped short at the sound of a familiar laugh.

“Destiny!” My mother exclaimed jumping up from the couch and rushing to greet me. “I thought you weren’t coming until tomorrow!” she said hugging me.

I stared over her shoulder speechless, looking into Tyler’s dark brooding eyes as he stared back across the living room.

The three months I spent in boot camp were the hardest of my life. By the end of the first week I was wondering what I had gotten myself into. As my high school experience had come to an end I was desperate to find my next direction. Uncle Mike was unintentionally pressuring me to make and declare my decisions for the future. College was a subject I had strategically avoided over the first semester of my senior year, but knew I couldn’t avoid it forever.

When the Marines recruiter came and spoke at the school it seemed the perfect solution. I would not allow my aunt and uncle to pay for my college education, they’d already done too much for me. The Marines provided me with an opportunity to stand on my own two feet and earn my own education. Find my own place in life.

I knew Mike and Katherine were not happy with my decision, but they supported it without question. However after the first week of basic training at the Marine Corps Recruit Depot in San Diego, I began to question it myself.

Somehow I survived those first 3 months of training, and was proud to see Mike, Katherine and Chance sitting in the front row at graduation. Destiny had already gone back to New York, and I figured it was better that way. She had her life to lead, her own dreams to follow. Now I had mine.

There were a lot of options open to me in the Marines, and I wasn’t really sure which direction to follow at first, so I decided to go on to the School of Infantry at Camp Pendleton.

Since I had requested West Coast duties I was stationed at Twentynine Palms. Even though it was only a few hours from San Diego, I chose to spend my weekends on base with the guys. In addition to my continued training on base I also began taking the college courses they offered.

Despite the initial shock of the adjustment to Marine life I found myself falling into familiar routines. It reminded me somewhat of the summer I’d spent in the military program my parents had sent me to, however this time I was here by choice. This time I actually liked it. In no time at all I began to think of it as home.

In the Marines I became a man. I left behind the boy I had been, I was no longer Tyler. Everyone just called me by my last name, Stone. I earned the respect of my fellow soldiers and the approval of my superiors. I had found my place and I had found it on my own. Everything I achieved, I achieved on my own. I felt independent for the first time in my life, and I reveled in the freedom of it. A year had passed before I began to feel lonely.