Lovers' Lies (32 page)

"Donovan."
 

"Dad? It's Keir. I need to see you."

Chapter Twenty-One

T
he absence of the usual press contingent was the first thing to grab Keir’s attention when he reached Dunstan
.

The second was an unfamiliar car parked in the forecourt.
 

Damn!
He muttered under his breath.
 

He didn’t want to face visitors before he had a chance to talk to Victoria. He pulled into the garage, parked then rapidly mounted the stairs not waiting for the lift.

Apprehension coiled his innards and great boulders sat in his gut. Was it even possible to make amends?

Fear and something very close to despair threatened to bring him to his knees. Keir knew he couldn’t blame Victoria if she never spoke to him again.

Since leaving Darkhaven, that fear threatened to swallow him whole.

For the first time in his adult life he was very much afraid he would not be able to correct an appalling mistake. He inhaled a sharp hurting breath and gathering courage, opened the door into the gallery overlooking the family room.

Shock stilled his breath.

Elizabeth Ellison sat serenely on a sofa reading to Connor. She looked up as she heard his footstep, her expression wary and nervous.

She did not look overjoyed to see him.

Can I blame her? After the way I’ve treated her in the past?

"Mother?" She was the very last person he expected to see. He lifted a hand to his chin, acutely aware of Garth Ellison standing behind his wife, his stance radiating tension. "This is a surprise."
 

And that was the understatement of the century.
 

His mother had never once visited him. And, judging by her expression, she wasn't at all sure of her welcome now.

"Daddy!" Connor tore across the room and hurled himself into his father’s arms. "I got a new granny? I got three grannies now. Granny Daphne, Granny Muriel and Granny Elizabeth."

Keir scooped him into a bear hug, focusing on his son as he attempted to regain some of his legendary calm.
 

As if today’s revelations weren’t enough to contend with, he had to face this unexpected visit with another woman he'd grievously wronged.

He did not need this.

"Now fancy that. Three grannies. Aren’t you a lucky one," he murmured, his voice husky with strain. "I need to talk to your granny, okay tiger?"

"Okay." Connor raced off all exuberant energy.
 

Walking far more sedately, Keir followed him and held out a hand to his stepfather. The man shook it but remained wary.

And with very good cause.

Shame scorched him as he remembered some of the names and accusations he’d flung at the nervous woman facing him.
 

"Ellison." They shook hands, the tension between them palpable. The older man’s grip an unmistakable warning,
don’t do or say anything to hurt your mother.

"Hello Mother," he leaned down and kissed her cheek.

"Keir." Elizabeth stood and held out a hand, voice shaky with apprehension, eyes wary. "Connor’s a lovely child and so like you at that age."

How did she know that? As far as he knew he’d not seen his mother since he was four. He frowned in question.
 

"So I’ve been told," his voice was husky with strain as he held her shoulders and looked into her face.
 

"I’m so damned sorry." The words were torn from him. "I’m so sorry for hurting you. You didn’t deserve it."

Her lovely throat worked as she swallowed and he knew she was battling emotions.

"It was never your fault, my darling. I’ve always known and understood that," she whispered, her face crumpling. "I could only watch you grow up from a safe distance. But there was never a day when I didn’t miss you, Seth."

"Don’t call me that. Using that name has caused me a power of grief," he managed a shaky chuckle.

"So I’ve learned." She lifted a hand to wipe away tears.

Keir, overcome with emotion, pulled her into a tight hug.

She buried her face in his shoulder and he discovered himself fighting tears. He sucked in a deep breath, and wrapped in her warm, scented embrace, memory warmed the chill place in his soul.

A place so empty it had ached all his life.

He knew, deep in his heart, that as a child he’d been held and rocked and loved by this woman. A gaping wound in his soul slowly closed and allowed healing to start.

Keir didn’t want to let her go, or lose this precious newly awakened memory.
 

He held her shoulders and looked into grey eyes swimming with tears.
 

"You never hated me, or abandoned me—" his cracked voice broke and he was unable to continue.

"I've never, ever hated you. You idolized your father; I couldn't take you away from him. But I loved you so much, sweetheart. More than you'll ever know." She wiped tears from her cheeks. "At first Caine was bitter—

"And then he married Muriel." Keir pulled his mother into his arms and as he held her, Muriel’s poison leeched away, setting him free. "You smell the same."

"I’ve always used this perfume." She managed a shaky laugh.

"I’ve just come from Darkhaven," he said roughly, "and finally asked the right questions. Dad had no right to lie to me."

Elizabeth lifted a gentle hand and stroked his face.

"Let it go Keir," she said softly, her palm warm against his cheek. "One jealous woman has caused us both far too much sorrow. Your father has not had it easy. And his future doesn’t look bright."

Now, that was something he understood.

"I’ll try," he promised softly. "What brings you both here?"

"Victoria rang and asked us to come," Garth spoke for the first time. "She wanted someone covering her back. Someone she could trust."

The wealth of accusation in those words sent fresh guilt spiking into Keir's conscience.

Guilt piled on guilt, and shame rode him hard.

He should have been the one person Victoria knew she could implicitly trust.

Not two strangers.

What did that say about him? That he was a rotten prospect for a husband and father. That he was judgmental and cruel.

And he’d scorned Muriel for using just such tactics.

"I see." He looked from his mother to her husband. "We’ll talk more, but first I need to speak to Victoria."

"You’ll have to use some fancy footwork to get her to listen to anything you have to say," Garth said with no small measure of satisfaction.

Keir grimaced and raked an agitated hand through his hair. "Tell me something I don’t know."

"Garth you promised," Elizabeth chided softly. Keir saw the look they exchanged and wondered just what promise she’d extracted from her husband.
 

"Can I come, Daddy?" Connor tugged on his hand.

Keir crouched down and held the child’s shoulders. "Can you stay here with Granny Elizabeth and Grandpa? I need to talk to your mum. Alone. Okay?"

"I s'pose," he said with a put-upon-sigh.

Keir dredged up a smile and tapped his nose. He rose nodded to the adults and then walked across the room. As he reached the door Ellison spoke. "Donovan?"

He looked at the man an eyebrow raised in question.

"I hope she gives you hell. It’s no more than you deserve."

"Garth! Stop it!" Elizabeth protested with a little laugh. "Go Keir. You have a jewel in Victoria."

He winced. Victoria was a jewel. One he had treated carelessly at that. He took the stairs two at a time. Outside her room, he paused unaccountably nervous.

His first mistake with Victoria, he realized with stark grimness, was not insisting she share his bed right from the start.

And it’s too damn late to start over.

Was this how she’d felt at Darkhaven? Had she been flummoxed meeting him and when started on a deception, hadn't known how to correct that first mistake?
 

Had she too wanted desperately to go back and start over?

Impatient, he knocked and opened the door.
 

His heart stopped and then raced. Victoria, her back toward him was placing folded clothes in an open suitcase on the end of the bed. For timeless moments he stared, winded with guilt and sorrow.
 

That glorious mane of hair had been ruthlessly cropped. Now its short waves, barely brushed her chin.

He clenched his hands as he remembered destroying her hairdo earlier. Guilt wracked him afresh.
 

And without that mass of hair, she was as vulnerable as a newly shorn lamb.
 

Was her control as tenuous his?

He breathed deeply, trying to summon his usual rational calm, but it proved far too elusive. His whole future rested on this moment and it scared the heck out of him. This interview scared him more than any of the multi-million dollar deals he did every day.

They only concerned money.

Victoria was his life and his soul. And he faced her as nervous as a teen on his first date.

"Victoria?"

Finally, she glanced his way. A surge of color swept up her neck and throat and her hands crushed the delicate silk fabric of a garment she held.

And he just knew she was remembering her humiliation at his hands. Shame seared him through and through. Had he hurt her beyond forgiveness?
 

Garth was right. He didn’t deserve a woman like Victoria.
 

He crossed the space, gently took the maltreated blouse from her hands and laid it on the bed.

"You cut your hair."
 

Victoria risked a glance at him, and then wished she hadn’t when she saw his expression. Her heart beat triple time and the boulders now permanently lodged in her stomach grew larger.
 

"It was time."

A fierce expression flashed through his eyes, increasing the trembling in the pit of her stomach. He tilted his head to one side and studied her intently. "I like it but—"

"But?" She struggled dismally for calm.
 

"I’m sorry you felt the need to have it done."

Victoria gnawed at her lower lip feeling naked and exposed. "It was more than time, Keir. It was a burden. One I’m not prepared to carry any more."

Guilt spiked and he flinched at her harsh words.
 

"Your hair. Your choice." Aware of the fine tremble in his hands, he buried them in his pockets. "You’re leaving?"

"What did you expect?"

The silence stretched as they looked at each other. Her vulnerability increased his guilt. He caught both her hands in his. "Have I put myself beyond forgiveness?"

Her lower lip trembled, she caught it ruthlessly between her teeth and blood bloomed in her mouth.
 

Every instinct screamed to stay strong and to finish this now. But facing him, she discovered that the decision wasn’t so easy.

"Why Keir?" She struggled to keep her tone even.

"Will saying I’m sorry help?" He increased the pressure of his grip.

"No." With a moment of clear insight she knew that unless he lowered those barriers and opened up, there was no way forward.
 

She was no longer prepared to settle for less than his total commitment. It was necessary if they were to have a meaningful future. One thing was certain, they could no longer continue as things stood.
 

"I’m sick of being played for a fool," he muttered.
 

Anger curled through her apprehension. She lifted her chin and looked him squarely in the eye. "And I’m tired of being judged and made to pay for some other woman’s sins."

A dull red crept up under his tan.
 

The subtle acknowledgement gave her the courage to demand answers. "Why that phony engagement to Davina?"
 

Why had he contracted that cold-blooded alliance? Knowing what she did now, she knew love never entered into the equation.

Keir winced and raked an agitated hand through his hair. "Donovans wanted their CEO to be a married man."

It was all she could do not to give a derisive snort.

He’d have to do better than haul out that lame excuse.

She watched as he began to pace, his agitation obvious, every line of his body taut with tension. Would he allow her to know the man behind the mask? Or were his protective barriers too deeply entrenched?