Authors: Karolyn Cairns
“I’m going to quit drinking. I’m getting a
n aversion to jails, I guess,” Emily said with a giggle. “I don’t think they’d suit me at all, no bubble baths and not enough closet space.”
Ian chuckled at her words and nodded. “Good girl, a life of crime isn’t for you at all.
Stay sober or call me.”
Emily was glowing from her evening with Ian as he led her to the door. She hitched up her purse, suddenly tongue-tied. This wasn’t a date, even if it had
the distinct feel of one. She knew to assume more was incredibly foolish, dangerous to her state of mind. Still, in those seconds where he stood with her at the door, she willed him to kiss her. He seemed to consider her for a minute. Then, the minute passed. He opened the door wider. She had no choice but to step out into the hallway.
“Goodnight Ian. Thank you for all your help tonight,”
Emily murmured softly, her eyes glued to his lips.
“No thanks are necessary, Emily. It was my pleasure.”
Ian stared at her a moment longer before he closed the door.
Emily
let out the breath she was holding and went to the elevator, cursing her weakness for the man. She practically begged him to kiss her goodnight. She felt like a jerk for lingering, knowing he must have felt her expectations. Hadn’t he warned her not to have any of those? Was it any surprise she had so many? The doors closed. She sunk against the wall of the elevator, wishing she met Ian in another life. The impossibility of them ever being more made her begin to feel despondent. She made her way out of the resort lobby to where her car was parked. She tried not to dwell on her disappointment the evening had to end. She sat in her car, thinking about all they talked about tonight, what she shared with him.
Emily
shivered to think of the cold look in his eyes when she confided what she overheard between Tabitha and Stu. She knew he could be ruthless, seeing it in his expression. He would deal with Tabitha and Stu, she could be sure of that. Suddenly she felt safe and protected, seeing Ian as her knight in shining armor. He would watch her back while she did her job. She was sure of that, some instinct telling her she told the right person what was going on at work.
Emily
drove home without incident, careful to go the speed limit. She knew she had enough wine on board to merit a trip to jail if she got stopped. Suddenly the lie she concocted about going to the bar tonight seemed more than a little sad and desperate.
Joan was the only friend she
even had. Her married girlfriend wouldn’t go to the bar without John. John wouldn’t be caught dead in one. That left her alone tonight, with no friends and no dancing. Emily was disturbed to feel an ache of loneliness within her that was so acute, she felt real physical pain.
What was it about grown-ups? Why was it so hard for them to make friends after they turned thirty? She could recall having a friend in only a few hours as a child. Not so now. It seemed harder to meet people
as an adult, harder for them to trust one another.
Emily sighed, refusing to cave into this depression tonight. She let herself into the dark house and turned on the lights. She removed her jacket
, kicked off her shoes, and set down her purse. It was then her cell phone began to ring. She took it out of her purse, her eyes widening to see it was Ian calling her. The fact he had her new number disturbed her. Did he know about the texting the night before?
Emily
rushed to turn on her radio on the kitchen counter, letting loud rock music blare, encouraging his belief she was at the bar as she answered the phone, yelling a greeting to him into her phone. She told him to hang on as she went out on the porch to hear him better. It was then she saw his Porsche in front of her house, his smile of amusement obvious as he got out of the car, shaking his head at her as she stared at him dumbly, shocked to see him there.
The fact she was busted in the lie she told him was obvious by his
delighted expression as he walked towards her. “Are you sure you’re not a pathological liar, Emily? Aren’t you supposed to be at the bar?”
“You followed me
home?” Emily glared at him as she pocketed her phone. “That’s kind of creepy, Ian! That makes me a liar, but you are definitely a weirdo stalker!”
“Why did you tell me you were going to the bar? I was worried so I followed you. Imagine my surprise when you went home
instead?”
“I made that up to explain why I was so over-dressed
.” Emily was unable to meet his eyes. “I don’t get out much. When I saw you in your sweats, I felt dumb for dressing up.”
“So you lied to me?” Ian shook his head as he stopped in front of her, his eyes filled with disbelief. “Does the truth ever occur to you, Emily? I might have been flattered you thought enough
about me to get all dolled up tonight.”
“I didn’t get all dolled up for you!”
“Liar! You did too!” He came nearer, his blue eyes blazing into hers. “Tell me the truth for once! Do you even know how to anymore?”
“I got all dressed up for you!”
Emily was yelling from the porch in her bare feet, her expression furious, fuelled by the wine and her unrequited need for him. “I wanted you to notice me! It’s all I ever wanted from the moment I met you! There, are you happy now? Some joke, right?”
Ian snatched her off the porch, shocking her as he dragged her into his arms. Before she could react, he was kissing her
with an intensity that took her breath away. The feel of those firm, unyielding lips on hers made her moan, her mouth opening under his, meeting his with a passion that shocked her.
He kissed her the way a woman needed to be kissed,
thoroughly, draining her, making her bare toes curl as they left the ground. He molded her against his chest then, his hands holding her aloft as he walked her backward to her front door, his lips never leaving hers. She gasped as he opened her front door and carried her with him inside, not breaking the kiss. He set her down, his eyes smoldering with desire, just like in her many fantasies. His words made her freeze, for they were never a part of the fantasy.
“This is going to be discreet
, right? No strings attached, Emily? Tell me now, or I leave and we forget this ever happened.”
Liar that she was,
Emily nodded, her lips burning to feel his once more, desperate to know what it was like to be with him. It hurt he would want to make this casual. The longing she felt for him just then was at war with what she knew was right. She didn’t have a discreet bone in her body. She already had strings attached to him, extending from her heart. To say she didn’t have expectations of him only further added to the belief she was a total liar. Right now, she didn’t care. She wanted him.
“No strings
attached. I would never say anything. I wouldn’t try to hurt you, Ian.”
Ian
seemed to relax at that, his guarded expression softening as he looked down at her. He reached out and slid down the strap to her cami, exposing the copper bra underneath. He cupped her breast, his expression filled with heat. “I don’t want any illusions between us, Emily. I don’t lie to women to get what I want. It’s not too late to change your mind. Can you turn that damned music down too? It’s giving me a headache.”
“No, this is what I want,”
Emily said, her eyes filled with need. “I want you.” She turned and flicked off the radio.
Ian glanced behind her in the direction of the living room beyond. “Is that your room in there?”
“No, it’s upstairs,” she replied, letting out a shriek as he snatched her up and carried her to the stairs. It was all happening so fast. She was dizzy with it, unprepared.
Ian smiled down at her as he hefted her up the stairs without any effort. “Save the screaming for later, Emily.”
She could only stare as Ian carried her upstairs, pointing to her door and smiling as he kicked it open. He saw the outline of her bed in the moonlight of the parted drapes and tossed her onto the comforter. He stood over her, his hands quickly removing his tee shirt. She swallowed hard as her eyes traced the perfection of his chest, the perfect rippled abdomen. As his hands went to the fastenings of his jeans, Emily tore her gaze from his hands to look into his eyes, seeing she had no reason to fear this. Ian wouldn’t hurt her.
“Can we slow down a little?” She licked her lips and scooted across the bed, seeing his hands f
all away from his zipper at her words.
“You want to talk
right now?” Ian ran a frustrated hand through his hair and rolled his eyes. “You pick the worst times to want to chat, Emily.”
“It’s been awhile for me,”
Emily replied nervously and reclined against the pillows. “My husband wasn’t feeling exactly amorous the last few months of his life. I just want to go slowly. Can we do that?”
Ian seemed to understand. He laughed and sat down on the bed beside her, smiling as he reclined with her, taking her hand in his, his larger one enveloping hers. “Sure, let’s talk. Sorry if I lose this raging hard-on you worked so hard to achieve. What do you want to talk about?”
Emily giggled at his words, knowing like most men, he wanted to get right to it. Her desire to talk must have made him suffer in those minutes. She took pity on him, finding nothing to say in the moments that passed as they lay together. “Ok. I’m ready now; only please go slowly.”
Ian laughed and covered his face with his hand, peeking at her through his splayed fingers. “That was some conversation we just had, Emily.”
Her answer was to bring his lips back to hers, sighing as he took over, pushing her back against the pillows. She was hardly aware of him removing her top, or her bra hitting the floor. The feel of his hands and mouth on her skin burned and branded her as he caressed her, touching her where she’d only imagined him touching her before.
Emily was on fire, her hands urging him to her, her body straining against his. The reality of feeling Ian against her was much better than anything she could have imagined. Each soft, lingering kiss, each touch of his hand, made her quiver inside with a yearning she longed to assuage. He took her nipple between his teeth, nibbling at her and making her arch off the bed. He pushed her back down, his hands going to her belt. She stared up at him trustingly as he slid down her jeans, his hands stroking over her
flat belly with knowing, masterful caresses.
Emily watched his lips descend with aching slowness
down her body, closing her eyes and biting her lip. She felt him slide down her panties, moaning softly as his fingers and tongue found her, parted her; moved within her. Her hands clenched into the comforter, her hips moving under his touch.
It all happened so fast, his moving over her, easing her legs apart. He paused to put on a condom. Then
, he was inside her, with one hard thrust that made her eyes widen in delight as he filled her until she gasped. Ian was breathing raggedly as he moved above her, his hips following hers as he surged within her. She met each downward plunge of his body, taking him deep within her.
He kissed her, his body rocking within hers. She held him, her eyes filled with desire as they met his. He was moaning her name, closing his eyes. She tried to hurry to catch up to him, knowing he was going to
explode at any second. She could feel it in the way his body stiffened, growing taut above her. She failed, feeling bereft as his body jerked above hers and he went still within her.
She carefully hid her disappointment as he slid off her and rolled to her side. It wasn’t the magical joining she imagined, even if it was
quite good. The fact she hadn’t had an orgasm wasn’t lost on her, as it was on him, or so she thought.
“I’m sorry,”
Ian said when he got his breathing under control, dropping a kiss on her shoulder. “It’s been awhile for me too. Next time will be better, I promise.”
“You don’t have to apologize
.” Emily’s head came to rest on his arm, her hand stroking his muscular chest.
“I don’t want to hurt you, Emily,” Ian said, his hand stroking her hair. “Please tell me you understand what this is between us
?”
“You’ve kept
all my secrets, Ian.” Emily raised her head and regarded him solemnly in the darkness. “I would never betray yours.”
Ian seemed to relax at her words. His hands soon grew busy, touching her again, reigniting the desire that soon swept her away. To say the second time wasn’t perfect would be to
ignore the loud, frenzied cries he drew from her lips or the destruction to her bed when they fell apart, bodies sweaty and sated. Emily couldn’t speak, so overwhelmed by what just occurred between them, knowing she’d never experienced it with another man before Ian.
Each practiced stroke of his body took her to another realm, another place, his lips and tongue driving her wild with abandon until she was weak and
begging him to end her torment. Ian was a lover of unparalleled stamina, his body hardly tiring as he brought her to orgasm three more times before she begged him to stop. He chuckled and nuzzled her throat, his soft words teasing.
“Who’s wimping out now? Oh no
, you don’t get away so quickly.”