Love to Love Her YAC (37 page)

Rhiannon – Thursday, 6:45 PM

I
t’s laundry night.
I have a load of whites in the washer and a load of darks in the
dryer. The white noise of the humming machinery provides a soothing
backdrop as I study for my Spanish test. I’m absently flipping
flashcards when my phone lights up with a call from my mom.

“Hi, Mom.”

“Hi, sweetie. Do you know yet when you’ll be
home for Thanksgiving? I’m getting ready to do a grocery run. I
want to be sure I have enough milk and everything.”

“On Sunday I think,” I reply. “I’m going to a
concert in Reno on Saturday night. I’ll head up the next
morning.”

“Okay,” she says. “Well we’ll all be glad to
see you. Especially your sister.”

“How’s she doing?” Tawny always tries to
sound so upbeat when we talk now, but the occasional break in her
voice gives away how tired she is. The only way for me to get the
real story is by asking Mom.

She sighs. “This new chemo regimen is doing a
number on her. She just doesn’t feel well. I’ve been having to keep
her home quite a bit more than she’d like.”

My eyes well with tears. I take a deep,
cleansing breath, recognizing the need to be a calming influence
for Mom, who’s already burdened with excessive worry. “It was hard
the last time, too. She’s strong—she’ll get through it. We just
have to focus on her getting better.” Variations on these exact
words have been uttered between us hundreds or even thousands of
times, but it doesn’t diminish the importance of the reminder.

“You’re right,” Mom says. Again she sighs.
“Well, I’ll let you get back to whatever you were doing. Drive
safely this weekend. And have fun at your show.”

“Thanks, Mom. Love you.”

“Love you, too.”

I end the call but continue to stare at the
phone for several moments before I remember to set it back
down.

Saturday, 6:00 PM

I
had been more than
a little surprised when Andy called me Thursday to invite me to the
Kings of Leon concert with him, especially knowing how we left
things on Wednesday. I’d never have guessed that I would turn into
such a cock tease, and I’m miserable thinking about it. In any
case, I have to give Andy props for being persistent. I’m viewing
this as my final chance to make amends and be the companion he
deserves for me to be.

I dress in a simple black sheath dress and a
pair of mules. I slick on clear lip gloss and twist up sections of
my hair, which I anchor with bobby pins. The overall effect is
maybe a tad over the top for a concert, but whatever—I felt like
dressing up. Andy picks me up at 6:30, and we head north on 580
towards Reno.

With time to spare before the doors open for
the show, we stop for a bite to eat at a California Pizza Kitchen
across the street from the casino. I watch Andy thoughtfully while
we eat, the way the muscles in his jaw ripple as he chews. He’s
really very good looking.

“Penny for your thoughts,” he says suddenly.
I swallow and fight to suppress the beginnings of a blush.

“Just wondering if the show will be sold out
tonight,” I lie.

“I wouldn’t be surprised. Seems like they
generated a lot of hype before they came through this time.”

“I’m sooo glad you were able to get tickets,”
I say with a coy smile as I lean forward, pushing my cleavage
together. Nothing wrong with a little flirting – we are essentially
dating
after all. (Come to think of it, it actually makes me
shudder a little to think that, technically, Andy I have been
“together” for longer than Blake and I were.)

Andy’s eyes drift downward for a brief
fraction of a second before he glances back up at me and licks his
lips. “Anything for you,” he rasps.

Blake – Saturday, 8:15 PM

O
ur seats are on the
mezzanine level. I wait with Alexandra in the disorganized mob of
people queued up to enter the theater; the opening band is set to
take the stage in fifteen minutes. Alex actually looks pretty cute
tonight in jeans, boots and a white blouse. She’s not bad for
company either—she’s never at a loss for words, that’s for
sure.

We’re almost up to the door with our tickets
when I glance over at one of the other entrances and my heart stops
beating.
Surely it couldn’t be
. A familiar head of
strawberry blond hair is facing the other direction. My eyes travel
past the girl’s slender neck and tapered waist to her long, creamy
white legs—suddenly I feel a bit dizzy.

“Sir?” a voice says behind me. I turn back
around to face the usher waiting to escort us to our seats.

“Blake, are you okay?” asks Alex. “You look a
little pale.”

I nod as I blink rapidly, attempting to clear
my head and regain my composure. The usher leads us to two aisle
seats about halfway down. Alex slides in first and I drop into the
seat next to her. My eyes continue to search the theater—I know I’m
being rude, but I
have
to know if that was her.

And then, suddenly, there she is. This time
there’s no mistaking it. She’s turned this way as she locates her
seat across the aisle and a few rows down. My memory of how
gorgeous she is pales in comparison to her true beauty. It’s as if
time is suspended as I watch her; it’s several minutes before I can
bring myself to glance away from her long enough to find out who
she came with.

The halting stammer of my heart turns to a
furious gallop when I recognize the douche from the Frisbee
incident at the beach and the party at that restaurant on the lake.
You have got to be
fucking
kidding me
. He puts his
hand on the small of Rhiannon’s back as she sits down, and suddenly
I feel like a ticking time bomb. Why the
hell
did I agree to
come here anyway?

Rhiannon – Saturday, 9:30 PM

I
’ve felt strange
ever since we took our seats in the theater. I can’t explain
why—something just seems off balance. Andy held my hand for the
first part of the show, then switched to having his arm around my
shoulder. None of this represents virgin territory for us, but for
some reason it suddenly feels
wrong.

The opening act took their bows a few minutes
ago, and now the headliners are due on stage any minute. I tell
Andy I’m going to get something to drink. At first he insists that
I stay put while he gets it for me—it takes some convincing to get
him to let me go myself. I just really need a breather.

I go to the restroom first to re-secure a few
bobby pins that have worked their way loose and reapply my lip
gloss. Then I go over to the bar and ask for an ice water. I move
to the side of the bar and nervously crack my knuckles as I sip
slowly on my water, not quite ready to head back in to my seat.

I’m staring at the floor when I notice a pair
of scuffed up boots that remind me of the ones Blake wears a lot—I
wince as his impossibly handsome face pops into my head for the
millionth time in the past three weeks. I lift my chin to look at
the stranger’s face—and drop my water glass.

It happens so quickly—I jump in surprise as
the glass breaks on the carpeted floor and icy water splashes on my
feet and legs. I’m reluctant to look up again, positive when I do
the face will be gone and I’ll have imagined the whole thing. The
thought of it is almost too much to bear, and so I simply stand
there shivering from the water and my overwrought nerves.

Someone rushes up to me and stoops to pick up
the shards of broken glass. All I can do is stare at the top of his
head. When he tips his head to gaze up at me I feel almost faint.
“
Blake
?”

“Rhiannon,” he says softly as he rises to his
feet, soon towering several inches above me. The back of my throat
feels stuck shut. I really wish I hadn’t dropped my water—I could
really use a drink right about now.

“I… What are you doing here?”

“Same thing as you probably.” He jerks his
thumb over his shoulder at the theater, his intense gaze riveted on
me. “Concert?”

I nod. The sound of cheering can be heard
from inside the auditorium, indicating the show has begun. Blake
steps closer; I glance down at his hand as he lifts it partway,
like he wants to touch me but then thinks better of it. “Can we
talk?” he asks, his voice nearly a whisper.

Before I can respond someone else
materializes next to me. Andy’s hand is strong around my upper arm.
Of course—
just perfect
.

“There you are,” he says to me, although his
eyes are locked on Blake. “You’ve been gone a while, so I came to
check on you,” he adds as he turns to look at me. “They started in
there.” His eyes are questioning.

“Yeah…let’s go,” I say. I came here with
Andy, not Blake—it would be rude to blow him off so I can run off
and have a “talk” with Blake. That will have to wait till
later.

Andy drops his hand to knit his fingers with
mine and turns to walk back toward the entrance to the auditorium.
I take a step to follow him, but before I can get far a large hand
touches my other forearm.

“Come find me after the show,” Blake says
quietly. His eyebrows are gathered as he silently begs. I give him
a slight nod, then follow after Andy.

Blake – Saturday, 10:45 PM

I
’ve scarcely
removed my eyes from Rhiannon the entire time I’ve been back in my
seat. The band is a little ways into their second set; they took a
brief intermission, but I remained rooted to my chair, watching her
like a fucking stalker while she talked to her
date
. Just
thinking the word sends waves of revulsion rolling through me.

Just before the end of the break I noticed
her take a phone call. She excused herself along the row of seats
and took long strides to exit the theater with the phone pressed to
her ear. It took everything I had not to run after her and make
sure everything is okay.

I’m being a perfect asshole to Alexandra. I’m
sure she’s thinking she might as well have just come alone
considering the shitty company I’ve been. Every time I look at her,
though, she smiles reassuringly as if everything is just
peachy.

The band strikes up a raucous version of “Sex
On Fire,” and most of the audience stands to sway to the rhythm of
the music. My eyes dart over to Rhiannon just in time to see that
fucker pull her to her feet. He wraps his arms around her waist and
sways his hips back and forth with her pressed up against him. I
feel frantic, like I want to jump over every seat that separates me
from them and beat the shit out of him until he understands to
leave her alone and
stop touching her
. …I need to calm
down.

A small hand covers my own—when I look down I
realize my knuckles are white from clutching the armrest so
tightly. I loosen my grip and glance up at Alex. She has a small
smile on her face as she pats my hand and then withdraws hers,
folding it back in her lap. I keep looking at her, determined not
to turn back around. Gradually I can feel my breathing evening out
again, and my heartbeat becomes less erratic. It’s as if Alex is a
mellow vacuum that has the ability to suck out all my feelings of
ill will and leave me with a better sense of calm. Suddenly I feel
more grateful to her than ever.

I manage not to glance back over at Rhiannon
more than a handful of times for the remainder of the concert.
Finally, at around a quarter of eleven, the band takes their final
bows, unplugs and exits the stage. We stand up to file out of the
auditorium, and my eyes search for Rhiannon once more. When I can’t
find her in the sea of people I feel slightly panicked.
What if
I can’t find her before she leaves?

Our trek to the exit is agonizingly slow. As
soon as we reach the doors I step to the side and pull Alex after
me. “Look, I’m really sorry about tonight—if I was…distracted. I
just need to try to find someone real quick, okay?”

She grins broadly and nods. “I know, Blake.
Go get her.”

Rhiannon – Saturday, 11:30 PM

A
ndy seems intent on
bundling me out to the car as quickly as possible once we reach the
lobby. I have to strain against him to look for Blake.

“I need to go to the bathroom real quick, all
right?” I say. He looks at me with a dubious expression, then
nods—he can’t very well deny me a trip to the bathroom. He follows
after me looking like a vigilante, as if he’s watching the people
around us for any sudden movements.

The line is so long to use the toilet I
decide I can wait. I waste some time anyway, washing and drying my
hands with extra care and taking a long drink from the drinking
fountain.

The first thing I see when I rejoin the horde
of people milling around the lobby is Blake with a girl I haven’t
seen before –
or have I?
She’s pretty, with raven colored
hair to her shoulders and black cat-eye glasses, and she’s beaming
up at Blake as if he’s just said something hysterically funny. I
wonder if this could be the girl I saw him going in that coffee
shop with a couple of days ago.

So he’s here on a date, too
, I think.
My stomach turns at the thought.

A split second later, his eyes find mine. His
expression is dogged as he strides over to me, like a man on a
mission. Just as he reaches me, Andy steps in front of me like a
shield. “I think you need to turn around,” he says severely,
slipping easily into the role of protector, however
unnecessary.

I’m so surprised by his unwarranted reaction,
it takes me a moment to think what to say, and by that time Blake
is already in his face. “It’s none of your business, man. I just
need to talk to her.”