Love Starved (15 page)

They were nearly at their destination, walking through a park, and the clouds chose this moment to break open, releasing a shimmering wall of rain that no tree could protect them from. Without thinking, Micah grabbed Aiden’s hand and sprinted the last five hundred yards to the restaurant.

They arrived at the cheerful red door a few minutes later; already drenched, slightly out of breath and laughing with exhilaration. Heart pounding in his ears, blood flowing faster, Micah felt electrified, alive. He only realized he’d been holding Aiden’s hand after it slid out of his grasp.

“Are we going in?” Aiden panted. He was grinning widely, hair plastered to his forehead in a way that had no right to look so appealing.

“Oh. Yeah.”

Inside, the cozy room was bustling with activity. This was a popular dining spot for quality-seeking carnivores, and tonight the weather seemed to have drawn even more people. One table in the far corner was free, and Micah started walking in its direction, navigating among people, when he heard a familiar high, breezy voice call out, “Hey, boss!”

Rebecca, a tall, skinny brunette with pixie-cut hair, was waving at him from the middle of a large group of students seated around a big table to Micah’s right. Her chocolate brown eyes were boldly outlined in green and gold, the make-up strengthening the cat-like quality Micah always saw in her. A petite dark-skinned girl with waist-long dreadlocks and a gold hoop through her eyebrow—the girlfriend, Micah knew—was perched on Rebecca’s knee for lack of space at the table. Several people around them turned to look at Micah, and he suddenly felt old for the company.

“Oh, hey, Becca. Friday night out?” he asked awkwardly.

She grinned. “We’re just starting. But hey, we’re not the only ones tonight. Good job, boss!”

That reminded Micah of why he was here, and with whom.

“Oh, this is my friend Aiden,” he said, glancing over at Aiden who stood silently half a step behind him.

“Friend, huh?” came a voice from behind them, and a second later Rob walked to the table, gracefully balancing a tray of beer bottles. He was the spitting image of his sister, minus the make-up and with his hair in a messy out-of-bed do instead of the girlish styling. “He’s cute, Micah. You have good taste.”

Micah rolled his eyes. “A
friend
, Robbie. Gay guys are allowed to have male friends too, you know.”

Rob passed the tray to one of his friends and turned back to Micah with a grin. “Damn. And here I hoped you would stop working us from sunrise till nightfall if you focused on a boyfriend.”

“If that happened, you’d have to ask your mom for pocket money soon, wouldn’t you?”

Rob’s eyes widened comically. “Oh. Right. Sorry, no boyfriends, boss. We need the work. Lots of work. To earn lots of money for lots of beer.”

Micah laughed. “I’ll pretend I didn’t just hear it from my
underage
employee.”

There were snickers in the group, and Micah nodded to them, “Okay, have a good night, guys. Just sober up by Monday, will you? I’ll have an assignment for you two.”

After they’d finally settled at the table and ordered their burgers, Aiden smiled at Micah over his glass of water. “Your employees? They seem kind of young.”

“They’re nineteen and geniuses at what they do, both of them.” Micah nodded, glancing over at the other table with a smile. “When I met them two years ago, they had already been hackers for three years, and were just about to start dipping their toes in the dangerous stuff because they were bored and wanted a challenge. So I gave them a challenge—occasional small assignments first, tracking things for my clients or simulated attacks. I wanted to keep them out of trouble because I liked them. They reminded me of myself at their age, you know?”

He saw Aiden quirk an eyebrow, curious, but chose not to elaborate. “Their technique is amazing,” he said instead. “They always work in tandem; they’d learned this way and developed some pretty unusual methods. Sometimes it feels like they can read each other’s minds. I give them all kinds of assignments now, including teaching lately, and I have yet to be disappointed. They are my right hand—hands?—in the company, really, even though I have several older and more experienced guys who work for me on an as-needed basis, too.”

“Looks like they lucked out with you recruiting them before they got in trouble.”

Micah shook his head. “Frankly, it’s me who lucked out finding them. There are plenty of people with our skills out there, and some are brilliant, but too many of them are skewed in one way or another. They don’t care anymore, or they are ready to work for anyone who pays them, no matter if they’d be helping or harming. I make it a point to never harm. I have a code. And with Rebecca and Rob starting so fresh, so young, they are unspoiled. I had the privilege to shape their understanding of this profession. I know that they’re the good guys, and that I can trust them. That’s crucial in our line of work.”

Aiden shook his head with a smile, making Micah frown.

“What?”

“Integrity and moral code. I like it.”

Micah felt himself blush. He busied himself with his glass of Coke.

“And I’m surprised you introduced me to them,” Aiden added, more quietly.

“Why? Shouldn’t I have?”

“No, no. I don’t mind at all. Just, considering what I do. I thought—” he broke off and looked down at his glass.

Micah frowned. “What, you thought I wouldn’t want to admit we’re friends because of your work?”

Aiden shrugged.

“What does it matter what you do? I don’t care how you earn your living. Besides, you’re not here professionally. If someone asks, you can tell them whatever you want, but I’m not going to pretend I don’t know you. Unless you want me to?”

Aiden shook his head, and when he looked up at Micah again, his face was soft and open, his smile tremulous.

“Thank you,” he said.

Micah frowned, confused. “For what?”

“Just, thank you.”

The rain ended as fast
as it started, and when they left the restaurant an hour later, only the puddles on the ground and drops of water showering down with every gust of wind through the trees remained. The air had a delicious, after-rain freshness, and the walk home was pure pleasure. And if Micah was tempted to take Aiden’s hand as they strolled side by side through the silent, wet park, or to press a quick kiss to his lips when they arrived at Micah’s building and said goodnight, he wouldn’t admit it. He just tucked the urge safely away, into the dark, hidden corner of his mind that held things that would not be.

They wouldn’t get to see each other over the weekend—Aiden said he had some things to take care of—and Micah was already missing him as he got on the elevator and rode up to his apartment to enjoy his quiet, solitary, completely unbearable evening at home.

There was a time, not
that long ago, when a perfect free weekend meant two quiet days at home, with plenty of time to read in bed, catch up on TV shows, and make something time-consuming for dinner. Maybe meet with Claudia or Daphne for brunch. Maybe Skype with his parents. Either way, a slow, solitary weekend used to sound perfect. Especially because it wasn’t to be taken for granted—all too often Micah’s weekends were just days to catch up on work, either at the office or at home.

So it was odd that he had been so edgy and restless since he woke up Saturday morning. The prospect of staying home and enjoying the drum of rain against his windows with a cup of coffee and a book was utterly unappealing today. The TV couldn’t hold his attention. He wandered into the kitchen to make something good for lunch and ended up with a grilled cheese sandwich and a glass of milk, staring out the rain-streaked window as he ate. He wanted to go out today—and not alone, either. Really, when had he started to need people around?

Claudia was working tonight, Aiden was busy with whatever it was he was busy with—and Micah had no idea how it happened that Aiden had become one of his go-to people—so Daphne was his only hope, unless he wanted to hop in the car and go visit his parents.

She answered when he was just going to hang up, her chirpy “Hello” coming out breathless.

“Hi,” Micah said, cutting right to the chase. “What are you doing today?”

“Depends.” He could hear upbeat music in the background. “Right now I’m on the treadmill for another half hour, then I have a massage and afterwards I need to pop into the office to deal with a few papers. Then I’ll probably order takeout because Danny has a business trip and I don’t feel like cooking for myself, and I was thinking of going dancing but so far no one wants to go, so I don’t know,” she rattled out. “Why?”

Micah deflated a little. “Oh, no reason. I just thought we could hang out.”

“Sure!” she said enthusiastically. “Let’s grab dinner together and then head to the club.”

He hesitated. Was he that desperate for company? “I don’t know, Daph. You know I don’t love clubs.”

“Oh come on, when was the last time you went with me? And I have a new favorite: It’s not as big as the one you hated; the music is better and they have live performers sometimes. Please. It’ll be fun. Pretty please? With a cherry on top?”

Daphne was an avid dancer. She always said she couldn’t really relax unless she spent at least one night a week dancing her butt off at one club or another. Unfortunately for her, her husband didn’t share her passion, but over the years, she’d built a group of friends and acquaintances who could be counted on to go most weekends.

Micah used to go with her often, pre-Brian. He used to like the dancing and the atmosphere. But once he was no longer single, the situation had changed. Going clubbing with Brian had been no fun—they would sit at a table most of the night, sipping drinks and talking with Brian’s friends, occasionally getting up to dance for a song or two. Going without Brian had been out of the question. After they’d broken up and Micah was free to accompany Daphne again, it wasn’t the same. He still liked the dancing, but the flirting and the expectations of more that seemed to always be there paralyzed him. So he rarely went. After a while, Daphne stopped asking.

Now, however, Micah found that the thought was no longer off-putting. In fact, going out with her, dancing and drinking, and yes, even potential flirting sounded like fun.

“Okay, why not,” he said.

“Really?” she squealed so loudly that he had to move the phone away from his ear.

“Really, as long as you promise not to push any guys on me. I’m not looking for a hook-up. I just want to have fun with you.”

“Okay, promise, I swear, I’ll be good. Yay, I’m so happy you’re going with me! Okay, come over at eight. We’ll go eat something light, grab a drink, and then the night is ours.”

“Okay.” Micah laughed at her enthusiasm. “See you at eight.”

“Oh, and Micah? Look dashing,” she added before hanging up with a final, “Yay!”

Dinner took longer than Micah
expected. Then again, he shouldn’t have been surprised; it usually did with Daphne. Afterwards, one pre-clubbing drink turned into two, and by the time they got out of the cab in front of the Caprice Club, it was almost eleven. Daphne claimed it was the best time to arrive anyway.

The place was already crowded when they paid and got in, and Micah was relieved to see that not everyone on the dance floor seemed to be college age. He paused on the stairs leading down to the room and looked around.

It was a simple space where music and strategically placed lights created most of the magic. A dozen booths hidden in shallow niches occupied one wall, with heavy black curtains pulled closed on a few of them. Red vinyl couches curved around low tables along the opposite wall, with a balcony above for those who preferred to sit farther away from the dance floor. Across the room on a small stage, a leather-clad man was singing a surprisingly good cover of a recent rock hit to the accompaniment of a small band.

Micah’s eyes slid over him in their survey of the room and then snapped back, widening. It couldn’t be. Surely he was mistaken. But—

“Angel?” Daphne exclaimed. “Oh my God, this is
amazing
. I had no idea he could sing.” She turned to Micah. “That guy on the stage? That’s Angel. Remember, I told you about him once. Come on, let’s get a drink and see if he’s as good up there as he is in bed.”

She tugged at Micah’s hand and he let her lead him down the stairs and to the bar without taking his eyes from the stage. He knew she was asking him something as they climbed the tall bar stools, but he was too preoccupied with the man across the room to listen.

Aiden—could it really be Aiden?—was strutting across the stage as if he owned it, in black jeans that looked painted on, cowboy boots with two-inch heels, his black shirt half-open under a studded leather jacket and his fingernails painted black. His sandy-blond hair was a well-styled mess with a few blue streaks over his forehead; his face was covered in stubble, and a smudge of black eyeliner around his eyes made his irises shine like molten gold. He looked surreal. He looked stunning and completely unlike the man Micah had started to call friend. He was like a gorgeous alien, transformed and sizzling with energy, and even if his voice didn’t have the strength of the stage titans, he had enough charisma and stage presence that it didn’t really matter.

Daphne pushed a cold glass into Micah’s hand and he sipped without tasting.

“So,” she said smugly. “Remember when I gave you a certain card a few months ago?”

Micah waved his hand at her. “Shhh.”

“Don’t you shush me. We’re at a club, not in a theater,” she scoffed. “You need to know what you’ve missed by not listening to my advice.”

“Daph, shush, I know,” he said, not even glancing at her.

“You
know
?” Daphne put a hand on Micah’s chin and forced him to look at her. “You know Angel,” she stated, her eyebrows arched in surprise. His silence was enough of a confirmation. “Oh my God, you totally slept with him!”

Oh, if it only was so easy.

“Daph, for God’s sake, shut up and let me watch?” Micah pleaded.

“You’re gonna tell me
everything
. Swear it.”

“Okay, I will, just… give me a moment.”

Just then the song ended and Aiden took a deep bow, beaming at the crowd, which applauded and whooped. “Thank you, guys,” he said, and then he turned and disappeared behind a curtain at the back of the stage. A tattooed blond girl in a corset took over the microphone and the music started again.

Micah sat stunned by what he’d watched, with a kaleidoscope of emotions turning in his head. Amazement at Aiden’s transformation. Arousal that he’d only just noticed pulsing through him. The sickening realization that Daphne knew now, and there was no way to undo that.

“There he is,” Daphne poked his side, motioning with her chin.

Micah followed her line of sight to the side of the stage, where a gaggle of girls gathered, and sure enough, in the middle of the group stood Aiden, laughing and talking, signing napkins and bellies, acting every bit like the rock star he looked.

“Okay, now I want all the details.” Daphne demanded. “When did you meet with him? Was he amazing? Why haven’t you told me?”

Micah shook his head. “Later, when we’re out of here. I don’t want to shout over the music.”

“Oh boy, I think you just earned yourself a sleepover.” Daphne rubbed her hands together and grinned. “Okay then, now let’s dance. There are more boys to look at.”

She was right. Micah hadn’t come here to watch Aiden, even if he did somehow find himself in the same club. He’d come to dance, to be surrounded with people. He finished off his drink and hopped off the stool.

“Okay. Lead the way.”

When they came back to the bar an hour later to grab something non-alcoholic to rehydrate, they were both sweaty and breathless, and Micah was grinning. It felt good to dance again; every muscle in his body remembered the exhilaration of being a part of the pounding rhythm and the swaying, undulating crowd of bodies connected by the music.

They perched on the stools to catch their breath, and Micah’s eyes instinctively went to the corner by the stage. Predictably, Aiden wasn’t there anymore, and his fangirls had dispersed, too. Micah scanned the dancing crowd. The flashing strobes didn’t give enough light to be sure, but he didn’t find the familiar blond head there, either.

Then something—or rather, someone—caught his eye: In front of one of the curtained-off niches stood a bald, bulky guy whose black T-shirt and no-nonsense expression clearly spelled
club security
. He didn’t seem to be watching the crowd or doing anything in particular, just standing there, but his presence was enough to make even the drunkest of clubbers give him a wide berth, and that seemed to be the point. As Micah watched, the curtain behind the man’s back moved aside and out came a pretty, curvy brunette, covertly straightening her red mini dress. She seemed unsteady on her stiletto-clad feet—and not just because of alcohol. Her hair was disheveled and there was a telltale blush on her cheeks as she glanced around. Evidently satisfied that no one was paying her much attention, she took a step away from the curtain and let her companion follow her out. Micah nearly choked on his Coke.

Aiden didn’t look as affected as the girl, but there were red lipstick traces on his cheek and neck and his shirt was untucked. He nodded to the security guard and Micah thought he saw him slide something into the man’s hand as he walked away. Then, with a hand on the small of the girl’s back and a cocky smirk on his lips, Aiden led her toward the exit. Micah turned away and bent over his drink as the couple passed by, straightening only when he saw Aiden’s cowboy boots disappear up the stairs.

It shouldn’t be shocking to see Aiden with a woman—after all, the first time Micah had heard about him, Daphne was telling him how satisfying Angel’s services had been for both her and her husband. But knowing was one thing—actually seeing the proof still left Micah feeling as though he’d missed a step on the stairs. He wondered who the girl was. A real-life girlfriend Aiden neglected to mention? Tonight’s conquest? He supposed even sex workers got out to have private fun sometimes.

Now that the rush of the dancing had worn off a little, he couldn’t help but acknowledge a pang of jealousy. But that was irrational. He had no claim to Aiden; they were just friends, and new friends at that.

Interrupting Daphne’s flirtation with the bartender, Micah pulled her to the dance floor to seek sweet numbness again.

It was past three when
they found themselves sitting cross-legged on Daphne’s bed, exhausted but wide-awake, and only slightly tipsy. Daphne hadn’t let herself be dissuaded from her sleepover idea, and Micah didn’t really mind. It had been way too long since they had a solid chunk of time just for themselves, without interruptions and responsibilities, and he missed it. He could even survive her green smoothie breakfast for that.

Micah’s clothes were sweated through and gross, so Daphne gave him a pair of Danny’s pajama pants and a T-shirt, and then put in a load of laundry as they took turns showering. Micah had to roll up the pants legs a few times and the T-shirt was ridiculously huge on him, but it didn’t matter. They were here, and it seemed like their old college days, before Brian and Danny and real adulthood. Daphne fluffed up a pillow and leaned against it, pink-nailed toes wiggling with excitement.

“Okay. Spill. I want to know
everything
.” When Micah didn’t launch into the story right away, not quite sure where to start, she prompted. “So did you or did you not sleep with Angel?”

“It’s complicated.”

She rolled her eyes. “Come on, just how complicated can it be? You took my advice and contacted him; you had the best sex of your life, and I’m a goddess for recommending him to you, yes?”

“Yes, not really, and possibly, yes.”

She backtracked over what she’d just said. “I’m confused.”

Micah stretched out on his side to face her. His muscles would be killing him tomorrow. “Yes, I took your advice and contacted Angel,” he clarified. “Yes, you’re very possibly a goddess.”

“But the sex wasn’t really that good? I don’t believe it.”

Micah shook his head. “No, we didn’t have sex. Well, maybe a little bit of sex. Which was amazing. But still too little to determine the ‘best sex of my life’ thing.” Okay, it might have been. But he still needed to verify it more thoroughly.

“Sweetie, then what the hell were you doing that night? Playing chess?”

“Four.”

“What?” She looked at him as if she was worried he was going crazy.

“Four nights. And two days, to be precise. And then some.” Seeing her blank expression, he sighed and explained. “I asked him for a fantasy date. It was amazing, but there was no sex, and it was supposed to stay that way. But then my sister heard about it from someone who saw us, and she assumed Angel was my boyfriend. I didn’t want to tell her the truth, so I paid him to go to her premiere with me, and then to my parents’ anniversary weekend, too.” Wow, summed up like this, it sounded more than a little messed up.