Authors: Cecelia Ahern
Just
because
she
ignores
me,
the
sinner
of
the
apartment
block,
it
doesn’t
mean
she’s
quiet.
Every
Monday
evening
I
noticed
there
seem
to
be
a
large
herd
of
elephants
making
their
way
upstairs
to
our
level
and
going
into
Joan
of
Arc’s
flat.
After
further
investiga-
tion
I
noticed
that
it
was
in
fact
the
same
twenty
people
who
visited
every
week
all
bearing
gifts
of
Bibles
in
their
hands.
My
further
powers
of
investigation
led
me
to
believe
that
she
was
holding
Bible
reading
groups
every
week.
Now
she’s
put
a
sign
up
on
the
door
saying,
“Ye
shall
walk
after
your
LORD,
and
fear
him,
and
keep
his
commandments,
and
obey
his
voice,
and
ye
shall
serve
him,
and
cleave
unto
him.”
I
mean,
what
does
“cleave”
mean?
Whoever
has
heard
of
such
a
word?
Alex:
Rosie:
Alex:
Ha
ha
Rosie,
oh
I
really
don’t
no!
You
mean
KNOW
not
NO.
You
will
never
learn
will
you?
I
think
not.
love,
rosie
295
Rosie:
Then
down
the
hall
from
me
are
a
family
from
Nigeria.
Zareb
and
Malika
and
their
5
kids.
And
I
thought
the
place
was
too
small
for
just
me
and
Katie.
Alex:
Rosie:
Sounds
like
Phil
and
Maggie
and
their
kids.
How
are
your
mum
and
dad?
My
multilingual
mum
and
dad
you
mean?
Well
they’re
having
the
time
of
their
lives
away
from
all
of
us.
Mum
recently
celebrated
her
sixtieth;
she
sent
me
a
postcard
saying,
“Zdravstvuite
from
Russia!”
I
can
just
imagine
the
two
of
them
enjoying
themselves
like
an
old
couple
from
the
Love
Boat
.
Speaking
of
the
dreaded
L
word,
what
was
with
all
the
personal
questions
about
my
love
life?
Alex:
Rosie:
Because
I
want
you
to
find
someone
that’s
why.
I
want
you
to
be
happy.
Alex,
I’ve
never
found
happiness
with
another
human
being
and
you
know
it.
I’m
separated
from
my
husband;
I’m
not
looking
for
another
victim
just
yet.
Possibly
never.
Alex:
Rosie:
Never?
Possibly.
Well
I’ll
never
marry
again
that’s
for
sure.
I’m
getting
used
to
my
new
life
again.
I
have
a
new
apartment,
a
new
job,
a
teenage
daughter,
I’m
32
years
old
and
I’m
entering
a
new
phase
of
my
life.
I
think
I’m
finally
growing
up.
Anyway
there’s
nothing
wrong
with
being
single.
Being
single
is
the
new
black.
You
should
know.
Alex:
Rosie:
Alex:
Rosie:
Alex:
Rosie:
Alex:
Rosie:
I’m
not
single.
Not
yet.
No
I’m
not.
I
won’t
be.