Love, Remember Me (23 page)

"
Then love me!
We are married," he ground out through gritted teeth. "You are my wife, Nyssa. We are bound to consummate this match tonight on the king's command. Damn, sweetheart, do not fight me now!"

Nyssa felt him penetrating her body, and she cried out. In a blinding flash she perceived what a manroot's use was. He was filling her full with it! She had a passage between her legs, and that was how a man locked his body to a woman's to create new life. She was not certain that she did not feel violated by his actions. Yet she could see that he was doing his very best to be gentle with her.

Despite her obvious terror, she began to open for him like a flower opening to the morning sun. His head swam dizzily as he slowly pushed himself into her tight, hot sheath. He did what he must now only in order to temper the king's ire, but dear God! He wanted this girl who was now his wife to love him as he loved her. Then suddenly his progress was blocked. He had reached the barrier of her maidenhead. She cried out and arched against him. There was, he knew, simply no gentle way to do this, for her maidenhead was firmly fixed.

"It hurts!" Nyssa sobbed. "Please stop!" she begged him.

In answer he drew back just slightly, then drove mercilessly into her fragile body, her scream piercing him to the heart. He saw the tears on her fair cheeks, and felt like a monster, but he could no longer help himself. He began to piston into her with smooth, deep strokes of his manroot, filling her full, driving as deep as he could go until he thought he would die with the pure, sweet pleasure of possessing her.

He was unforgivably cruel, Nyssa thought, sobbing as the burning agony swept up into her belly and down through her thighs. She fought him wildly, desperately seeking to elude the terrible torture he was inflicting upon her. Then, as suddenly as it had burst over her, the pain was gone. In its place was the distinct sensation of his strong body deep within her body. He pulsed and throbbed inside her hot passage until her head began to whirl. She was overwhelmed with a pleasure such as she had never known. She wept with the feeling, reveling in the sweetness until they both seemed sated with it, collapsing into each other's arms, exhausted, and to her utter amazement, wonderfully contented.

Varian de Winter rolled his weight off of Nyssa. Reaching out, he enfolded her in his embrace. Neither of them could say a word. His big hand stroked her tousled, dark hair gently, silently communicating his tender feelings for her. Beneath her cheek his heart beat wildly, slowing gradually, until finally it simply thudded rhythmically, comfortingly.

Nyssa was absolutely astounded by the passion that they had shared. She was also furious that her normally forthright mother had never even discussed these things with her. How could she? a saner voice in her head asked, and Nyssa honestly realized that there was no way Blaze could have possibly explained what just happened between herself and the Earl of March.

Was she all right? Would she ever forgive him for what had just transpired? Varian was almost sick with anxiety, and said low, "Are you. . . are you . . . I know I hurt you, but it was the shattering of your maidenhead. It only happens once, Nyssa."

"I could not have begun to imagine it," she told him quietly.

"Then you forgive me, sweeting?"

She raised her head to look at him. "I know that you were both patient and kind, my lord. I apologize for my fear. I am not usually so cowardly." She touched his cheek with a single finger. "This passion is a most powerful thing, is it not? Is it always so?"

"Between people who desire each other, yes, my love," he told her, catching at her hand, turning it and kissing the palm.

She nodded gravely, and lay her head back down upon his chest. "Will the king be satisfied that we have done our duty?"

"Aye, Nyssa, he will," the earl told her.

She said nothing more. Very shortly he realized that she had fallen asleep. He lay awake for some time, listening to her slow breathing until, finally lulled by it, he fell asleep too, his arms wrapped tightly, protectively, about her.

They were awakened several hours later by a loud knocking upon their chamber door. Before he might arise and answer it, the door swung open and his grandfather entered the room. Varian de Winter drew the coverlet over his wife's nakedness.

"It will be dawn soon," the duke said without preamble. "Is the girl breached?"

He looked directly at Nyssa, but she was not in the least intimidated by him. She glared back, angered not merely by his intrusion, but by what she considered a great lack of delicacy as the old man ran an appreciative eye over her.

"Well, my lord? Is she breached?" he repeated. "She's fair enough to have aroused your lust."

"If you will leave the room," Varian said tightly, "I will obtain the proof for you that should satisfy the king, Grandfather."

"We have something to discuss first," Thomas Howard said bluntly. "Stop looking as if you would plunge a knife into my heart, girl," he ordered Nyssa. "What's done is done, but now we must have an explanation for your marriage to silence the gossiping tongues."

"You are so skilled at scheming, my lord," she answered him, "that I will leave it to you. What can you possibly tell people that they will believe? My virtue is well-known in a court not known for virtue. What will you say? That I was suddenly overcome with a reckless passion for your grandson, and he with an equal desire for me?
That we eloped
?" She smiled with false sweetness at the Duke of Norfolk.

"It has already been decided, madame," he replied coldly. "You have but to go along with the explanation. Your aunt and uncle see the wisdom of my plan, and have agreed to it. The king also agrees, for he will have no shame fall upon you for your wicked behavior of last evening."

"
My wicked behavior
?" Nyssa's voice rose dangerously. "Cease this charade, my lord, I beg you. I know how I came to be in the earl's bed last night. I know of your wretched plot to make poor Cat queen."

"
Do you
? Then you know enough to hold your tongue, girl, else you and your husband end your days in the Tower," the duke snapped.

"Were it not for my loyalty to Queen Anne," Nyssa said, "I should leave Greenwich this very day, sir!"

"You are free to leave, madame," he said.

"Nay," Nyssa answered him. "I will not leave my queen alone and defenseless, my lord. I will stay until the end. His grace has said that I may continue to serve her for the present."

"Then listen to what I tell you both. Last night Varian de Winter stole you from the Maidens' Chamber and raped you. You escaped him and fled to your relations. They protested to the king, who saw to your immediate nuptials. In this way your virtue remains intact, madame. You become the innocent victim in this affair," the duke said.

"Which I certainly was," she snapped back at him, "but I will not allow you to defame my lord husband in this manner! It is not right! Have you no heart, my lord duke, that you would blacken your own grandson's name further like this?"

"Considering his reputation," the duke told her, "it is the perfect explanation for what has happened. You, madame, will abide by it."

Nyssa opened her mouth to protest further; to tell him that she knew her husband's reputation was a false one, that he was innocent of the crime he had admitted to. But Varian suddenly squeezed her hand very hard beneath the coverlet. Nyssa's mouth closed abruptly. She turned to look questioningly at him. He put a warning finger to her lips and shook his head at her. For some reason he did not want her arguing further with his grandfather. She wondered again if perhaps his black reputation
was
deserved. Had Varian told her the truth or had he lied to win her over last night?

"I hope, at least," the earl said, attempting to inject some humor into the situation, "that you will claim I was driven by my passionate love for Nyssa, Grandfather."

"Considering the king's affection for me," Nyssa said wickedly, "will people not wonder why he has not clapped Varian in the Tower for this crime of passion he has committed against me?"

"The king is a married man for all intents and purposes," the duke said, discomfited by her continued show of spirit. "He could hardly admit to having loving feelings toward another lady, madame."

"He did toward your niece Anne, under similar circumstances," Nyssa answered him.

"Madame, you tread on dangerous ground," the duke growled at her. He turned to his grandson. "Obviously I have given you a viper to wife, Varian. Perhaps I should apologize to you."

"Aye," Nyssa returned angrily. "You should apologize to us both, my lord. You are a cruel man."

"
Be silent, sweeting
," the earl said softly to her.

"You know what you must do," Thomas Howard said coldly. "I shall wait outside for the proof, Varian. Be quick! The king will be awakening at any moment. I would have this over and done with." He turned and departed the room, closing the door behind him.

"How can you give him your loyalty?" Nyssa asked her husband when they were once again alone. "He thinks nothing of sacrificing your name in order to advance his ambition."

"This will be the last time he does so," the earl replied quietly. He loved his grandfather, but this was really too much. Sweet Nyssa knew not that much of the blame for his alleged rape of her would fall on her slender shoulders despite her reputation for virtue.

"I hate him!" she declared vehemently. "He is a wicked man!"

"But what other explanation could have been given for our sudden marriage, Nyssa?" he asked her. "We have hardly spoken to each other until last night. There was, I fear, no other way. I apologize for the pain and embarrassment it will cause you."

"Could he not have said seduced? I should rather be thought a foolish maid than you be called a villain.
Why rape
? It is disgusting, my lord! It makes you out to be an evil man, and I think you may not be one!" she cried. She was so confused! "Could we not have kept the marriage a secret from everyone for now? Would that not have been better? It was, after all, important only to the king," Nyssa said.

"What if our coming together last night produces a child? How would you explain your condition, Nyssa? It is better that our marriage be known. I will have no stain of bastardy on our firstborn." He tipped her face to his and kissed her lightly. "Now get up, madame."

"I have no clothing, my lord. I will need Tillie," she said.

"Tillie?"

"My tiring woman. You must send for her to bring me clothes," Nyssa told him.

"Wrap yourself in the coverlet for now," he said. "I need the bottom sheet from our bed for the king."

"Why?" she demanded of him, but she arose from the bed and carefully wrapped herself in the coverlet as he had advised her.

The earl pulled the top sheet away and pointed. "There, Nyssa, is the king's proof. The blood of your maidenhead staining the sheet." He yanked it off the bed. Going to the chamber door, he opened it and handed the bedcloth to his grandfather without a single word. Then he shut the door firmly and turned to his wife. "I will send my man Toby for your servant. Will she be in that small room the servants for the queen's ladies inhabit? What does she look like?"

"She is brown-eyed with a single flaxen plait, small of stature, and just my age," Nyssa told him. "Oh, please be certain that your Toby is discreet! There will be scandal enough, I fear."

The earl called for his own servant and instructed him most carefully. "I married this lady last night," he explained to the surprised Toby. "Do not believe the gossip you will hear as to why. Now go, and fetch my lady's tiring woman. Her name is Tillie." He described her.

"Tell her to bring me my clothes for today," Nyssa said to Toby. "I must attend the queen, and I can go nowhere until I have clothing."

"Yes, m'lady," Toby said, keeping his eyes well-averted from the beautiful girl wrapped in the coverlet. It was just all too much for him. He hurried off to find the woman called Tillie.

She, at first, did not believe the young man's story. "My mistress is in the Maidens' Chamber where she belongs," she said firmly.

"No, she ain't," Toby said low, struggling to keep his voice down. "She is in my master's bedchamber wrapped in a coverlet. She can't come out without her clothes, and says you are to fetch them to her. If you don't believe me, go and see for yourself, miss. I ain't much for jesting, as anyone who knows Toby Smythe will tell you. Look in the Maidens' Chamber if you will. Your lady ain't there."

Tillie did just that, and not seeing Nyssa about anywhere, ran to the little storage room where the maids of honor were allowed to keep their clothing. Quickly she gathered the garments needed, and also snatched up a hairbrush and shoes. "All right," she said to Toby. "Where do we go? And if I find you've made a fool of me, laddie, I'll see your master punishes you, and I'll get in a few smacks myself."

"You're a feisty one," he replied with a grin. "Follow me."

Tillie's eyes widened as they entered the Duke of Norfolk's apartments, but she said nothing. Toby knocked at a paneled door, and when it was opened, he waved Tillie through. She hurried past him, relief suffusing her features as she saw Nyssa. "Oh, m'lady! What has happened? Why are you here instead of in the Maidens' Chamber?"

"I am a married woman, Tillie," Nyssa said quietly. "Put down my clothing and send Toby to fetch some water for my bath. I will tell you everything, but I must reach the queen before the gossip does, if possible."

When Tillie had sent Toby off to do her bidding, she sat, at her mistress's insistence, upon the bed, listening while Nyssa told her the truth of what had transpired. A simple country woman, Tillie was shocked by the scheme fostered by the Duke of Norfolk, but she was relieved that Nyssa had told her of it. It would be easier to deal with the gossip knowing the real facts of the matter. She agreed to keep secret what Nyssa had said, fully understanding the necessity of it, for she was not a stupid girl.

"Yer mama and papa are going to be very angry," she noted when her mistress had finally concluded her tale. "They won't like it one bit that you've been forced into this marriage. I know they always promised you that you could make your own choice of a husband. I don't see how you can get out of it, though, the archbishop himself having performed the ceremony." She sighed, but then asked, "What is yer bridegroom like, m'lady? Is he handsome? They say he's a real devil with the ladies. At least," she amended, "that's the talk amongst the upper servants, but most of what they say is so much tittle-tattle, I find."