Love Redone in Hidden Harbor (Island County Book 2) (25 page)

I wanted to believe in a happily-ever-after ending, but I was afraid.

And I was a realist.

 

Still paying the price for snuggling with Pickles, I sneezed a few more times and put the warm washcloth over my face. My eyes had swollen up to the size of kiwis, and my throat tickled so badly absolutely no snort I rumbled itched it to calmness.

Cole had emailed when he got to LA yesterday, and he emailed this morning. They were short and sweet and I returned the favor. I wanted to believe he was coming back.

But I didn’t and I had no idea why.

Just my gut.

“Ugh,” I groaned, wiping the warmth over my face. “Pickles will be the death of me.”

I was on my lunch hour at the house, lying on the couch, and trying to get my allergies under control. Unfortunately, it gave me ample time to wonder about Cole.

If he did happen to come back and we did happen to make this relationship last longer than a few months, then what?

My cell rang, and I stretched my arm to the coffee table and blindly reached for my phone. Without checking who it was, I answered.

“Hello?” I mumbled through the washcloth.

“So you saw?” Sophie asked, her voice strained.

I shot up and the rag fell from my face.

“Saw what? What are you talking about?”

“Oh,” she said softly.

“I didn’t see anything. I’ve been on my couch trying to stop sneezing with a rag on my face and tissue stuffed up my nose.”

“Why did Cole say he needed to go back to California?” she asked.

My pulse started pounding in my ears.

“He had to take care of two clients who were about to face charges. Why?”

“Well, that’s probably true, but I think that’s not what made him go down there.”

“Would you just tell me? My laptop’s at the shop.”

“You know Charlotte Hunter?” she began.

“Who doesn’t?”

She’d starred in several romantic comedies in the last two years and was definitely Hollywood’s It Girl.

“Is she one of Cole’s clients?”

“I have no idea, but someone is threatening to release a sex tape with her in it.”

My stomach gnarled into a ball. What did that have to do with Cole?

“And the tabloid reporting on it names Cole as the guy who—”

Sophie’s voice went from soft and feminine to one of those slow, deep voices that drawled down to almost nothing. I didn’t want to hear what was coming out of her mouth.

Had Cole been with Charlotte Hunter? Did it matter? He was single.

But his brother made me think Cole hadn’t been…

It didn’t matter what I thought.

“Natty, are you okay? No, of course you’re not okay. I’m coming right over. I’ve got about an hour before my shift starts.”

“No need,” I assured her.

“Did you even hear what I said?”

“I heard enough. Cole. Sex tape. And I wasn’t the other person in it.” I picked the cold washcloth up from the couch. “I’m fine.”

“So he didn’t tell you about this.” It was more of a statement than a question.

I reclined back on the couch. “Nope. Can’t say that he mentioned it.”

“I’m on my way.”

She hung up without even a goodbye, and I draped the cold thing over my face.

At least my sneezing fit had stopped. Maybe that was the answer. Live in a shocked state of confusion for the rest of my life, and my allergies would be in remission.

My phone buzzed and something told me it was Cole so I ignored it.

But it buzzed again and again.

So I silenced it.

He definitely lived in a different world than I did. One of the many reasons why this wouldn’t work. I’d never want to be taped having sex, and if I did, you better damn believe that thing would be under lock and key with armed guards.

I let out a groan as my phone started vibrating off the coffee table and rather than turn the vibration off, I turned off my phone entirely.

Maybe I was pissed I wasn’t the one starring opposite Cole in the production. But if he had been with Charlotte Hunter, it told me everything he said couldn’t possibly be true while we were making…having sex this weekend. She was no doubt the most beautiful woman alive.

Not that it mattered.

I sat back on the couch, feeling nothing less than a fool. Nick was right. I was wired to care. That didn’t make me less than, but it made my life more complicated. I thought back to Mr. Harten. I bet he never predicted this kind of interference with round two of Cole and Natty. I shook my head in disbelief.

And then my mind wandered to the tape itself. I wondered what he looked like in it, and I wondered what the production value would be like. Was it one of those shaky handheld,
hey look at me
videos or was it the real deal with proper lighting and everything? Probably the latter.

That would be how I’d want it done.

Cynthia suddenly seemed like the battle I’d much rather fight. I threw my head against the back cushion and groaned as a thought occurred to me.

Did Cole tape me too?

A pounding on my door spooked me right out of my speculation. Both Sophie and Nick had keys. I glanced out the window and saw a car I didn’t recognize.

“Who is it?”

“Anthony.”

“Did your brother send you to do his dirty work?”

“It’s not like what it seems. I guarantee you.”

“Whatever. Tell your brother that Fireweed is too small an island for people with honesty issues. He should have told me why he was flying to LA.”

Anthony let out a few mumbled curses, and I realized he was talking to his brother on the phone.

“She won’t let me in,” Anthony said, and then he went quiet. “I’ll tell her. Natty, he told me to remind you of your promise.”

“I made that promise before I realized I’d end up looking like a fool. Deal is off.”

Anthony put his cell on speakerphone and Cole’s voice came over. “It’s a false extortion attempt. You’ve got to believe me.”

“Sure it is, buddy. Any man who had the opportunity to sleep with Charlotte is not going to turn it down.”

“I didn’t sleep with her. I have never slept with her. There is no tape. That’s why I didn’t bother telling you. I though we could squash this before it hit the papers.”

I wanted to believe him, but rather than say a word about it I stared at the solid wood door between Anthony and me.

“Anthony, how did you get here? You’re not supposed to be driving.”

“I had the nurse bring me.”

“Why are you ignoring me?” Cole asked.

I wasn’t trying to ignore him. I honestly didn’t know what to say.

“Do these things happen often?” I asked, my arms folded in front of me.

“Not involving me, but I’ll explain everything. Promise me you’ll give me a chance. Listen, I’ve got to go talk to my lawyers.” Cole’s voice sounded distant. “I thought you’d pick up my call, Natty. Are things ever going to change?”

His words were like a million stabs to my heart because I had no idea.

“Or are we always going to be two ships in the sea sailing in opposite directions?”

“I don’t know, Cole.”

“What was that?” he asked.

Right. There was a door between us.

“Okay, Cole. I’ll call you when I get back to the house.” Anthony hung up on his brother. “He didn’t sleep with her.”

“I believe him, but our lives are so different. I don’t know if we’ll ever—”

“Cynthia is the one extorting them.”

My blood chilled.

“Are you serious?”

“No reason to lie. My foot is throbbing. I’ll be up at the house if you need anything, but I hope you give my brother a chance because I don’t think he could survive this twice.”

I heard his crutches hit the gravel and let out the breath I’d been holding in. Sophie’s key met the lock minutes after and she flung open the door to see me standing in the foyer in tears.

It was like I was destined to shut Cole out of my heart forever. I’d made my mind up eight years ago and lived my life accordingly.

“That bastard,” Sophie said, giving me a hug. “Who does he think he is?”

“He didn’t do it,” I said, between sobs.

She took a step back and looked at me confused.

“Then what’s the problem?”

“I wouldn’t answer his calls, and he had to send his brother over to get me to talk to him.”

“Oh,” she said softly.

“I don’t think he left the island with any doubts.”

“But he has them now,” Sophie finished. “I’m sure he will understand the shock of everything. We’re not used to stuff like this.”

“I know,” I breathed out. “I’ve got to get a hold of myself. If it’s meant to work out, it will.”

“But it might help if you picked up the phone. It’s a bit of a sore spot with him. And definitely answer his letters.”

I gave a faint smile and took a deep breath in through my nose. At least I could breathe now.

“Nothing like a little heartache and scandal to keep those histamines in check. It looks like you’re going to be okay so I’m headed to the Loxxy.”

“Thanks for checking on me.”

“That’s what we’re here for.” She shut the door behind her, and I grabbed my phone, turning it on to a flood of messages from Cole.

It’s not what it seems

Don’t believe what you read

It’s not true

Let me explain

Please don’t ignore me

You promised

Please just pick up

I never meant to hurt you again

Please answer me

I never thought we’d be back to this place

I’m begging you to give me a chance

My heart hurt, and I knew I needed to make a change. I only hoped it wasn’t too late. I needed to believe in second chances. I needed to believe in Cole.

 

It had been quiet from Cole. Seven days of quiet.

I knew he was busy with everything going on, but I worried I’d screwed up our second chance before it even started. I wanted to make things right. I wanted to set out clear expectations for myself
in writing
so he understood that I understood what we were dealing with, which was that I was a sensitive nut. It was tricky trying to rekindle a relationship that had so much history and with that so much heartache.

But I didn’t want to miss out on the one person who made me happy. I wanted to let this go where it was meant to go, no matter how it ended.

I sat at my laptop with Pickles by my side and began typing my heart out.

Cole,

I wanted to put this in writing in case you ever needed to remind me of some bad habits I’ve developed over the years. I know you’re busy tending to things that only Hollywood can
conjure, but
I wanted to tell you I’m sorry for not picking up the phone. Over the last eight
years, I created a life
that I love. It’s my own little bubble where not much penetrates it. In fact, you need to hop on a ferry to get here.
 

Anyway, I like the protection of my bubble. I like that I don’t have to let anyone into my bubble. It has kept me safe over the years and happy.

It’s not easy for me to imagine us working. I want to believe in the possibilities, but I’m afraid to let myself dream. I’m afraid to let you in my bubble.

That realization became painfully clear when I refused to pick up the phone. It was almost like I’d rather end what we had now than end it later when more was at stake. I’ve got hang-ups that yoga and breathing exercises don’t fix. (Long story. I’ll fill you in sometime). I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m sorry, and I’ll try to do better.

I’ll pick up the phone if you call, even if it’s to tell me you’re engaged again (kidding).

Only not.

What I’m trying to say is that I want you in my bubble… even if that means my bubble might burst some day, at least I had you in it.

Natalie

I stared at my letter and glanced at Pickles who nuzzled against my hand that rested on the send button.

“Should I do it?” I asked.

I took her silence as a yes and hit the send button.

This was a good exercise. It made me focus and get everything out in the open. I had no idea what to expect, but I felt good about it. I stood up and tickled right behind Pickles’ left ear. She didn’t seem to mind so I tried the other one, and I even got a purr out of her. Maybe things were turning around.