Love Me (Trust Series #2) (3 page)

From the side, I look up at him. “You okay?”

He’s at a loss for words, and he just nods. I turn back around and give Sam a wink. Damien’s all but got me in a death grip at this point, and I have to mash my lips together to keep from giggling.

Sam continues on as if what she just said has had no impact on the man who barbarically takes me from her at bedtime anytime she stays the night at his home. “I’ve got to finish putting the cake in the oven. I’ll see you guys when you get back. Congratulations to you both again. Wales, you better be one hell of a brother-in-law.” She gives us both a hug.

Damien tries to chuckle at her comment, but it sounds more like he’s an animal in pain. He’s still reeling from her earlier nonchalant statement.

Mental high five to Sam for sure.

In unison, Damien and I both say, “Bye, Sam!”

She waves and turns to go back into the house.

Good grief, she’s smooth. She’s the perfect accomplice.

I look innocently at Damien. “So, where are you taking me?”

“It’s a surprise. Are you ready?” he asks in an almost robotic voice.

He’s trying to recover. I nod and follow his lead as he opens my car door. He’s totally speechless.

Poor guy.

He’s in the car and about to pull out of the driveway.

I touch his knee and coyly say, “What’s wrong? You’re pretty quiet all of a sudden.”

He closes his eyes as he takes a deeper than normal breath, and then he looks at me with his blue eyes on fire. “I’m trying to do everything you want here, Alli, but I cannot spend the night without you in my bed. There’s just no fucking way. I’m going through my options on how the hell I’m going to get you in my arms tonight without disrespecting Sam’s parents.”

Seriously, I say, “Well, it’s a good thing I told Sam we aren’t staying the night then, isn’t it?”

“You two just played me?” he asks incredulously, his face a myriad of emotions.

I start giggling. “Yes, it’s been in motion since breakfast. I expected you to go all caveman on me, but this might be a better reaction.”

His lips turn into a smile. “Well played, my love.” He leans in closer to me and grazes his teeth along my jawline. “I look forward to getting you back.”

With a comment like that, my thighs push together to hold back the ache.

“But not now, baby. I want to take my fiancée somewhere, if that’s okay.” His face is both sensual and loving.

“Sounds good.”

With my assent, he holds out the blindfold that I had to put on for the drive out to my parents’ farm before Damien proposed. Without hesitation, I grab it and put it on.

“If today’s surprise is as awesome as last night, you’ll never hear me complain again about blindfolds.”

He starts the slow drive to our unknown destination. “Last night was the best night of my life, Alli.”

I could burst from all the happiness I feel.

Sooner than I would have thought, I hear the car shift into park. I assumed that we would be going on a longer journey, like we did last night. If I had paid attention, I could have probably figured out where we were going.

Damn it.

The driver’s side door opens and closes, and then he comes to assist me out of the car, just like last night. Slowly, Damien guides me along the way, and the sound of gravel crunches beneath our feet. One hand is at the small of my back, and his other is holding my hand up to his chest over his heart. He’s got something in his hand at my back, and it makes a crinkling noise as we walk. It sounds like plastic.

I don’t know why we really don’t say anything during these moments. I think it’s because we are both taking in every part and branding the moment to our brain.

Everything smells and sounds the same as it did out at my parents’ farm. We stop, and Damien turns me to my right.

His voice pierces through my current state of darkness. “Alli, before I take off your blindfold, I want to explain something. I came here to pronounce my love and intentions for you back in the summer, one week after we made love for the first time. I came back again when I knew how and where I would propose to you. Now that I have asked you to be my wife and you said yes, I think it’s important for us to come back here. I want us to bring all our important milestones here—when we get married, when you become pregnant, when our first child is born—all of them, Alli. I want to give you the world, and this is the only way I know how to come close to giving that to you. I will love you forever. Please love me forever.”

Tears begin to pool in my eyes. An unnamed emotion came over me when Damien talked about me becoming pregnant with his child. I know he wants kids, but for him to say it like that makes my heart blossom and explode in never-ending love as I realize that I will one day carry his child.

“Damien, I’ll love you forever, I promise. You’re my world.”

He gives me a gentle kiss on the lips before stepping back to my side. He unties the blindfold and drops it to the ground. My eyes focus on what’s in front of me. I cannot believe it. We are at my parents’ gravesites. The tears begin to flow as the emotion of everything sets in.

My thoughts are chaotic as I wait for the feelings I normally have when I come here by myself—sadness, loneliness, anger. But after hearing his beautiful words, I feel things here I’ve never felt before—happiness, love, hope. I never would have thought I could have those feelings again and be able to keep them a part of my life.

Sensing Damien’s anxiousness by my side, I turn and throw my hands around his neck. “Oh, Damien! I love you so much. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.”

He pulls me tighter to him. “I hope those are happy tears, baby, because I would never try to upset you. I just thought that this is something you would have wanted them to know about and be a part of.” His hands are stroking my back.

I pull back and wipe away my tears to clear my vision, so I can focus on Damien.
His love and concern for me are evident.

“This is perfect. I didn’t even know I needed this until now. They would have loved you.”

He pulls me back into an embrace, and we stand there for an immeasurable amount of time. After a while, Damien hands me a bouquet of flowers.

That must have been the crinkling noise I heard.

I grab the flowers and kneel in front of the large tombstone that has both of my parents’ names inscribed on it. “Daddy, Mom, I miss and love you so much. My life will never be the same without you in it. But I want you to know that I’m going to be okay now. I love Damien with all my heart, and he loves me. He would be the exact person you would have handpicked for me if you were still here. I’m so happy because of Damien. Mom, he’s my happily ever after, like Daddy was for you.”

I lay the flowers on the grave and then hover my hands over their names on the tombstone. My throat tightens. To be able to share this with them is special beyond words I can express. Standing up, I walk over to Damien, who looks like this is affecting him emotionally, too.

“Baby, I love you so much. I swear that I will spend the rest of my life showing you.”

This will be one of the most cherished moments of my life. “I know, and I love you, too. Thank you for giving this to me. It’s the first time I have come here and didn’t feel like the sadness was going to swallow me whole.”

“Oh, baby.”

We hug and just stand there, absorbing the love we have for each other. This is one of the most special gifts he could have ever given me.

The gentle breeze is soothing as we rock back and forth.

When we start to let go of each other, I ask, “Would you like to go into the church? It’s where my mom and dad got married and where I was also baptized.”

“I would love to.”

He grabs my hand, and we slowly make our way to the church.

The church is an older design without a narthex. When we walk into the church, we are literally in the sanctuary. The church itself is white with stained glass windows lining each side of the church. On the top of the church is a huge steeple. My mom was part of the committee who worked hard to get the new, improved one. They wanted to make a statement, and they were so proud of its splendor. At night, a light on it illuminates it in a heavenly way.

As we make our way through the old wooden doors, I am flooded with happy memories. Three sections of pews sit in front of the pulpit at the far end with seating for the choir behind it. Off to the left is where the piano is kept. It’s a simple church without all of the high technology that is seen in a lot of churches today. And for some reason, it works, and no one would change a thing about it.

Damien pulls me to one of the pews in the middle section, and we take a seat. Memories from my childhood pour into my mind.

He interrupts my reflective thoughts in almost a whisper, “This is where your parents were married?”

I lean my head on his shoulder. “Yes, they both grew up in this area and came to this church as kids. I think they were the third generation to go here.”

“Do you want to get married here, Alli?”

He seems to be making the wedding all about me, but he should have some say in this, too.

“I don’t know. What do you want? This should be about the both of us.”

He puts his index finger under my chin and raises it until I meet his gaze. He’s got his super-serious face on. “The only thing I want is for you to be my wife as quickly as possible. If you’d marry me tomorrow, I would make it happen. I’m getting the only thing I want, which is you. I really want to know what you want. Any other details don’t matter at all to me. Please tell me.”

When I stop for two seconds and think about it, I know exactly what I want. I feel so selfish telling him what that is, but I know he wants and deserves the truth. I know it will never happen, and I’m okay with that, but I might as well put it out there to give us some sort of starting point. I just want to share my life with this man.

“Okay, I’ll tell you. Please know that in the end, I just want to be married to you, too. We can change any of this. I want us to both have the wedding we want.”

He nods for me to continue before I’ve even finished talking. He’s excited that I haven’t completely sidestepped this conversation.

Here we go.
“I would prefer an incredibly small wedding, and I would like to get married without anyone knowing because of the excess drama that would ensue. Preferably, I’d like it to happen before anyone even knows we’re engaged. We seem to have a lot of crazies in our lives even if we generally don’t let them affect our relationship. The drama still causes stress by just having to deal with it. I want this to be one of the happiest times in our lives. I would love to have the ceremony here because of the significance. My parents had a beautiful marriage, and I know we are going to, too. I don’t need any fancy decorations, but I do want a beautiful dress.”

“Define incredibly small.”

He sounds hopeful, which I’m surprised about because my wants sound absurd, even to me. I figured he would want privacy, but all that I mentioned just seems a little subpar for Damien.

“I just want to be surrounded by those who love and support us wholeheartedly in our marriage. I know this isn’t possible, and it’s selfish, but I want only Sam and her parents in attendance. I feel horrible even having those thoughts because I know your parents should be a part of it, but you asked, and I wanted to be honest with you.” Guilt washes over me. I basically just told him that I don’t want anyone associated with his life at our wedding.

“Never feel guilty for telling me what you need or want. If we did all of that, how fast would you be willing to get married?”

This is so not going how I thought it would go. If his eyes are any indication of how he is feeling, he would be jumping up and down in his chair in jubilation.

“Damien, I would never ask that of you, but in all honesty, I’d marry you tomorrow if I had my dress. I don’t need anything else.”

He angles his body slightly, so he can look me straight in the face. “Are you absolutely sure that is all you want?”

Oh geez, is it possible that he’s actually going to go through with this? Good grief, I could be getting married tomorrow.