Love me if you dare: Alpha Billionaire Romance (The Secret Matchmaker Book 5) (2 page)

Dinner at Asher's was far more relaxing than I’d expected it to be. Kazu was a well-dressed Japanese business man in his mid-forties, with no family of his own yet, from what I could gather. He had a soft spoken voice and a kind smile, which had to be part of the reason I wasn't ready to hide behind Asher.

I'd been around the business world for most of my life, but always on the periphery, never anything like this. Owning my own company had always been my dream, but there was far more to it than I had considered.

If anyone other than Asher had tried to teach me the lesson from the Onsen the day before, I would have opened the gates of hell on them. But there was a difference between him and anyone else.

He had my best interest at heart. He loved me. I was his on his mind, which was far more comforting than I’d imagined it being.

I watched the two men talk over a cup of ice cream and let my thoughts go. How in the world everything had flipped back around so quickly was beyond me.

The last two weeks of my life had been hell, simply because I thought there was no hope left for me and Asher. Sofia was his perfect match and I had no doubt that they would have been incredible together, but here he sat. With me.

I picked up my own cup of ice cream and took a small bite, needing to distract myself from my current thinking before tears spilled over on my cheeks. I didn't deserve a guy like him, and yet I was too far lost to him to even think about pushing him away.

Some part of me knew that I should have told him I loved him the day before when he had confessed his feelings, but I wasn't ready yet. I did love him, but speaking it out loud would mean commitment and I was acutely aware of where commitment had led me in the past. I couldn't handle that yet, so I kept it to myself.

"Lila. You okay?" Asher reached out and squeezed my hand as his beautiful blue eyes held kindness for me.

"Yeah. Just thinking through everything." I let out a soft sigh and shrugged. "I guess I need to go back to the drawing board on all of this. I'm a little disappointed, but not willing to throw in the towel just yet. Anything is possible with proper planning and the unbreakable spirit of someone who believes in it."

"Exactly, and you
are
that person." Kazu nodded toward me, smiling, before standing and pulling his phone from his pocket. "I need to get going, but this was a lovely evening. I'm so glad to have met you Lila, and this isn't the last time we'll talk. Rest assured."

"Thank you." I stood and offered my hand, shaking his and sitting back down.

Asher and Kazu chatted like old friends as they walked toward the door, and I leaned back in my chair, finally allowing myself to relax now that he was gone.

I'd been rejected by banks and real estate firms a million times, but this was different. The others had been careless, cold and rude, but Kazu and Asher had worked in tandem to deliver hard news that wasn't a rejection as much as a requirement to step back and carefully analyze everything again.

I had enjoyed talking with Kazu throughout the evening, and getting to learn more about him in the process. My respect for him was locked into place simply because of all he'd achieved and been through himself as both a businessman and a person.

He was a billionaire who had launched over eleven companies across the world, and all of them were currently worth eight-figures at least. It was truly inspiring, yet intimidating as well.

I heard the loud exhaust of a sports car accelerating as Asher came back.

"Well, I know that wasn't exactly what you wanted to hear, but I hope you gained some clarity." Asher moved in behind me and slid his strong hands over my shoulders, kneading my muscles and drawing a groan from me.

"It was a great experience, really. Thank you, Asher. I like him a lot. He’s incredibly intelligent and yet has a great sense of humility." I closed my eyes and forced myself to relax into Asher's capable touch.

"I like him, too. It's been quite some time since I found myself intrigued with someone in the business world. He has a lot of knowledge to share and I'm always one for making friends with people who leave me better than I was before meeting them." He leaned down and kissed the side of my face. "I know we just ate, but I'd love to take you to this little cake shop in town that has the most wickedly good chocolate tarts ever."

I glanced up at him and chuckled. "I'm stuffed, but how can a girl refuse chocolate?"

"She can't." He winked and released me. "Especially when it’s her first date."

"A date? Our first date?" I got up and started to gather plates, batting my eyelashes seductively.

"Absolutely. My girl deserves the best, and I assure you... you're going to fall in love." He laughed and shifted the plates in his hands to open the door of the kitchen.

I stopped and stared at him intently. He was breathtaking. His shirt was open at the top and his smooth tanned skin was on display, leaving me wanting to see farther into the soft fabric of his shirt.

"What?" He grinned and sent me a devilishly sexy look.

I looked away, trying to disguise how much he was turning me on. "I'm just enjoying the view."

"I could say the same. I undressed you a hundred times while our guest was here." Asher put the dishes down and moved over to stand beside me, taking the rest from my hands.

"And what did you do once I was naked?" I asked, while rubbing his lower back as he started the water in the sink.

He glanced over at me and narrowed his eyes. "What do you think? I made love to you, of course. What would you do if I were naked in front of you right now?"

I swallowed hard and looked down, my cheeks burning and butterflies on the move in my belly. I’d jump on him and beg him to bring me over the edge without hesitation. But I couldn’t say it.

He chuckled and I lifted my gaze to his, wondering why.

"What?" I mumbled.

He turned the water off, dried his hands and slid them over my shoulders and down my arms. "Why is it so difficult for you to let go? Just relax and do whatever comes naturally to you."

I bit my lip and took a quick unsteady breath as I reached for his shirt with a shaky hand. I unbuttoned it slowly and let my eyes wander over the thick swell of his pectoral muscles, while pushing the garment off of his large shoulders.

"God, you're so sexy." I moved in, pressing my lips to his chest and licking my way down to his nipple. I pulled it into my mouth and sucked softly before sliding my teeth over it.

His hand cupped the back of my head as he growled. "All yours, baby."

"Mine," I whispered and licked his nipple once more before nodding to the counter. "Let’s go over there."

"I thought..." He started, but my stare seemed to dampen his spirit to fight back. "Right."

He leaned against the counter and reached for me, pulling me to him and leaning down to kiss me roughly.

I let him have control for a moment while I worked to get his slacks open and free his cock from his underwear.

"Lean back. A little more… and no touching." I glanced down at the thickness of his erection as my body tightened. I stroked him slowly, but firmly, feeling his pulsating cock in my hand. His knob was shiny and throbbing, already coated with pre-cum. I used my thumb to rub his rim and gently dug my nail in his flesh.

He tilted his head backward and let out a moan. "Aw… that feels good, baby."

"I’m just getting started." I moved to swirl my tongue around the head of his cock before sucking it firmly into my mouth.

"I love it when you suck me..." He groaned again and caressed my hair as I started to take him in deeper. I wanted him to be addicted to me, to be unable to forget me. Ever.

The sensual look on his handsome face left me panting softly around his cock, my own body screaming for release.

I slid my palm up his flat stomach and over the deep valleys of his abs before rubbing softly over his chest as I used my other hand to work him to the edge. My teeth scraped by the tip of his cock and he cried out loudly.

His fingers sunk into my hair and he pulled it hard enough to confirm he was the man in the room, but gently enough to make me want to surrender to his authority. "You’re so hot. I can’t get enough of you. What are you doing to me?"

I was panting and in a state of frustrated arousal as I used my hand to tug on his balls. I drove his cock deep into my throat and fought to control my gag reflex, focusing on bringing him screaming over the edge of orgasm.

His breathing hitched a moment later and he let out a guttural cry as his entire body tightened. He released his load inside of my throat and I worked hard to keep him coming for as long as he would let me, swallowing everything.

"Oh yeah..." He groaned again and bucked one last time before lifting me off the ground. I landed on the counter and he leaned over me, covering me with his large body and holding me tightly to him. He kept silent, but the intensity of his gaze sent a shiver down my spine.

I reached up and touched the side of his handsome face. "You're so delicious. I want more of you." I leaned in and kissed him, loving the way his tongue pressed deep into my mouth as if he wanted to taste his own release. I rolled my tongue over his and breathed him in until the kiss ended.

Warmth rushed through my veins and ecstasy overwhelmed me. Surprisingly, it wasn’t sexual at all. I finally realized that it was due to the fact that he belonged completely to me.

"Let's go up to my bed. I want to hear you scream my name." He touched my face and smiled wickedly.

"Sounds delightful, but I need some chocolate cake to accompany all that cream in my belly." I winked and turned as he sucked in a tight breath and chuckled.

"My God, you’re incredible. Marry me. I’m serious." He moved off the counter and I glanced back at him, lifting a shoulder innocently.

"In time. Now... I want that tart you promised."

Watching Lila enjoy the chocolate tart was sinful. Her pretty pink tongue kept darting out to lick at her fork and I wasn't at all ashamed at how much it turned me on.

She had taken her time with me in the kitchen and she was every dirty fantasy I'd ever had come to life. It was crazy that I found myself wanting more of her physically simply because I was in love with her.

I had to hold back and stop myself from telling her how much I adored her every ten minutes, or how beautiful she was, and that I was a lucky man because I had her in my life.

She didn't need to hear all that gushy stuff all the time, at least not until she gave herself over to me fully.

"What are you thinking?" She asked and licked her fork again.

"You don't want to know." I sat back and crossed my arms over my chest as I took in the glorious sight of her.

"No? Something negative?" She drove her fork back into the chocolate and lifted it to her full pink lips.

"Never. I was jealous of your attention to that fork." I leaned in and slid my hand across the table, rubbing softly along her hand. "You're spending the night with me."

"I am? That sounds like a demand." She lifted an eyebrow at me and I grinned.

"That's because it is." I squeezed her hand and let out a sigh. "My place or yours?"

"Yours, definitely. Mine is very messy and not that comfortable. It's embarrassing."

"I want to try something new. Let’s go to your place." I narrowed my eyes, waiting to see her reaction.

"I just told you it was a hot mess over there. Please, don’t insist."

I paused, trying to keep calm. An unexpected and sudden rush of jealousy spiked in my veins. "Are you hiding something? Is it about… James?"

She frowned and shook her head firmly. "I’m not hiding anything, Asher. Please, don’t go off on that tangent. There’s nothing to find."

"Well, you didn’t answer. Is it about him?"

She quickly looked to the side and sighed. "It’s about him, but not the way you think."

A lump started to grow in my throat. "And what do I think?"

She finally looked at me, shy and uneasy. "James and I lived in that place for a few years. I wanted to move out, but the rent is very reasonable and I never took the time to look for something better."

She paused and took a sip of water. "I don’t want to bring you there, Asher. You’re a great guy and… it would be an insult to force you to be there. You deserve better. You’re above all the drama of my past. I don’t want to be a burden for you."

I reached for her hand, touched by her willingness to include me in her life. "A burden? Are you kidding me? You’ve been a breeze of fresh air in my life."

She looked down and smiled. "Why are you doing this, Asher?"

"I want to know more about you. Tell me something about yourself."

"Like what? You know everything."

I shook my head. "I know practically
nothing
about you. Do you have siblings? Where are your parents? What did you want to be when you were a child?"

"It’s not glamorous, I warn you."

I shrugged and smiled. "Even better. Come on, this is our first date after all. This is where normal people start. What’s wrong with us?"

She chuckled and sat the fork down. "You’re funny." She paused, obviously considering what to tell me. "No siblings, my father is deceased and my mother lives in Washington. My dream as a child was to become a princess."

I wanted to smile, the thought of her as a little girl too cute to resist, but I didn’t, out of respect for her father. "I'm sorry to hear about your dad." I watched for signs of sadness, but found none.

"It's okay. It was a really long time ago and I actually didn’t know him that well. At all, really. My parents divorced when I was three and I don’t have any memory of him. Mom was a janitor and well… it was tough." She shrugged and ran her fingers along the tablecloth. "I never talk about these things, you know?"

"Why not?"

She lifted a shoulder, talking her time to answer. "People always judge. They assume things about you based on where you live, where you went to school, your skin color, how much money you make… or don’t make. People are always wearing a mask; pretending to be someone they’re not. I don’t like to play that game. I want authenticity and tolerance. I want to be accepted for who I am today. The past is irrelevant." She stopped and waved her hand in the air. "You must think I’m boring. Sorry about that. Let’s talk about something else."

I nodded, surprised to see that she had such a deep outlook on life. "I totally agree with you, Lila. I was born in San Francisco, in a gay neighborhood. I know a few things about tolerance, trust me."

She raised an eyebrow, skeptical. "Are you serious?"

"Mom and Dad are both still there. You can ask about it when you meet them."

She flushed and I quickly changed the topic. "When the time is right of course. I’m also an only child, which I regret sometimes." I lifted my hand to get the servers attention and asked for the bill. I took the check, then offered my black card to the young waitress.

"And... what did you want to be when you grew up?" Her eyes moved across my face, her interest in my answer unnerving.

"It's embarrassing. I'd rather not say." I signed the bill and got up, offering her my hand.

She took it and pulled herself up before snuggling into my side and kissing my shoulder. "Tell me. I want to know."

"It’s a bit cheesy. You won’t make fun of me?" I glanced down at her, not at all concerned with her teasing me.

"I'm not making that promise."

"Fine. I wanted to be a dad." I shrugged and held the door open for her. She paused and stared at me open-mouthed, as if she didn’t believe me. "You see? I told you."

We walked outside and she kept looking at me. "Tell me more."

I gave my ticket to the valet and ran my hand through my hair. "I’ve always wanted to be just like my father. I still do. What did you expect?"

"So you didn't dream of being a real estate guy, a doctor, or an actor or anything? Just a good dad?" Her voice softened and I knew I'd hit a sore spot.

"Yep. Not much has changed, but money has this attractive draw to it. You start making it and life feels good. You get caught up in it thinking you’re invincible with the power of it, and you move from one deal to the next, thinking the party will never stop. You delay making important decisions about things that truly matter to you and you get older. Then one day, you realize there’s no special someone by your side, and you remember what life is truly about."

"And what is that? What is life truly about?"

I looked up at the beautiful, clear sky. "Other people. Love. Sharing something. Passing on your knowledge to the next generation. Family."

She slid her hand into mine and lifted our entwined fingers, kissing mine softly. "I love that answer."

"I’m glad you do."

"I want kids. Lots of them." She turned to me and pressed herself to my chest. "How many do you want?"

"None until I find the woman who's going to be beside me forever. I'd never want to chance hurting a little human." I leaned down and kissed her softly. "Is that woman you, Lila?"

The valet pulled the car up and she simply smiled at me, but something had changed. She was smiling with her eyes and I knew her answer, even though she hadn’t said a word.

***

"You’re really stubborn, Asher. Really." She sighed and cocked her head to the side as I pulled up to her parking garage. "I already told you that it's a mess."

"I'll help you clean it up." I parked and got out, standing by her door.

She got out and bit her lip, embarrassed. "If it was only about that, it’d be fine. I told you about—"

"I don’t care about James. I’m a man and I need to mark my territory. I’m with you now and you’re with me. Like you said, your past is irrelevant." I cupped her pretty face in my hand and stared at her intently. "I want to create new memories with you here. Do you understand?"

Her eyes widened a little and I moved down to kiss her softly a few times as I slipped my fingers into her long hair. "No more worrying about your place or the past, okay? I accept you the way you are and the way you live." I licked her neck before sucking the soft lobe of her ear into my mouth. "I want you so much."

She moaned and dug her fingers into my sides. "You follow my instructions, okay?"

"Okay."

She opened the door to the apartment with nervous hands and moved inside. I followed her and ran my hand over the wall to find the light.

"Wait... don't turn on the l—"

It was too late, my finger had already pushed the switch.

"Lights…"

As the living room came to life, I nearly choked on emotion. The entire wall was covered with pictures. Of me. Dozens and dozens of pictures of me behind my desk, in meeting rooms, shaking hands, talking on the phone, drinking coffee, swinging a gold club, eating, sitting, everything. My whole life was on display on this wall.

She stood still, livid and avoiding my eyes. "Research. I do it with every client."

I smiled softly, truly touched. "I don’t see anyone else on this wall."

"I… Err…" She closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose, shaking her head. "Dammit. I told you not to come. I want to hide. Somewhere. Anywhere. Can we turn the lights off now?"

"Don’t do anything." I walked to the wall and touched one of the pictures. I remembered that moment perfectly. I was smiling, eyes closed and face slightly up. The warmth on my face was due to a joke she had told me at that moment.

"What are you thinking? It’s so embarrassing, Asher. Say something."

"It's the sweetest thing I've ever seen. It feels personal. Like you care." I glanced over my shoulder as my chest filled with warmth. Nobody had ever done anything like this for me.

"I do care." She moved toward me, breathing heavily with gleaming eyes. "A lot. Too much."

I brushed my fingers across her lips. "I’ll never hurt you, Lila. I promise."

She gasped and closed her eyes, while I started working on the lacy strings of her top.

She whispered and let me remove her shirt. "I’m afraid, Asher."

"Why?" I unhooked her bra and she covered her beautiful breasts with her arms.

"It’s going too fast. I feel like I’m losing control. I’m not good at this…"

I kissed her collarbone and went down to her navel. "You’ve done pretty well so far." I removed her pants and let keep her underwear, exposing her beautiful curves nonetheless. I started kissing her sex through the soft fabric, but she shivered and pulled me up.

"Not here. Come with me."