Love Like Hallelujah (17 page)

The potato salad was mixed, the grill was hot, and a bottle of champagne chilled in a bucket on the bar counter. Stacy looked around her apartment, satisfied. She wasn’t rich, but had a knack for making the most of what she had. Her decor was Afrocentric. A grouping of masks adorned one wall, wooden figurines occupied end tables. One intricately carved ebony piece was of a couple entwined. It was her favorite, and held a place of prominence on her coffee table. Colorful works of Black artists were showcased throughout the apartment, complementing tan leather furniture.

Stacy had pondered what to wear and finally decided to go casual with cut-off jean shorts and a tank top with spaghetti straps. She wasn’t wearing a bra, but didn’t need to. Her breasts were small, firm, and fit the top nicely. She’d kept her makeup light as well, only lip gloss and mascara, wanting to give the appearance that tonight was no big deal.

But it was a very big deal. Stacy had high hopes for the evening. If things went okay, she’d get a kiss. If they went good, a feel or two. Great, some deep French kisses and maybe other oral action. And if things went perfect, Darius would wake up at her house in the morning.

Stacy walked out on the patio to check the grill. The charcoal was grayish white, a red glow beneath. She went into the kitchen to prepare the meat for the burgers and, using one of her brother’s tricks, added finely chopped onions, peppers, and chili powder to the ground round. If the way to a man’s heart was through his stomach, she hoped this meal would hasten the journey.

She’d just looked at her watch when the doorbell rang. Darius was right on time.

“Hey, you,” she said, opening the door and giving him a big hug.

“Hey, back,” Darius said, returning the hug. Even with her crush on him, Darius was comfortable with Stacy. She and Tanya had been best friends for years. He’d already planned how he would handle the friendship—as if she was a best buddy. He would be friendly and funny and caring and kind. He’d maybe throw in a kiss or two, just enough to keep things interesting and keep the questions down.

He walked into the living room. “Hey, where’s the food? I don’t smell anything cooking.” He pointedly sniffed around. “Don’t tell me you ordered pizza!” This was one of his sister’s commonly and widely known meal solutions.

“Look, I can cook, okay?” Stacy teased. “I hope you brought your appetite. But you’ll eat this food even if you’re not hungry, it’s that good.”

“Oh, look at her, the woman is sure of herself,” Darius said. He walked around the living room, checking out the statues and artwork. “I like your decor.”

“Thanks.”

“You’ve got good taste, an eye for color.”

“I try. HGTV is one of my favorite channels.” At times, Stacy entertained the thought of hosting a show on the Home and Garden network.

Darius walked over to the entertainment center and began browsing Stacy’s CDs.

She’d forgotten music! How could she invite a musician over and not have the sounds playing? “Put on anything you want,” she said, walking out to the grill with a plate of burgers.

When she came back in, Jill Scott’s melodious voice filled the room. “Don’t you just love her?” Stacy asked, joining him in the living room with the bottle of champagne.

Darius turned around. “She’s, oh, what are we celebrating?”

“Your butt finally coming over to my house,” Stacy said jokingly. “Even though you kept a sistah waiting. I’ve only been asking you out for a year, and waiting a month!”

“You’ve never asked me out.”

“Strongly hinted.”

“Well, maybe that. But see what happened when you just came straight out with what you wanted? That’s what women do, throw out these little hints and innuendos and expect us to figure out a whole story.”

“Maybe, but you can’t tell me you didn’t know I liked you.”

“No, I can’t tell you that. Here, let me do it.” Darius took the bottle and walked toward the kitchen. “In case it sprays,” he said over his shoulder.

While Darius popped the cork and poured the bubbly, Stacy flipped the burgers. A subtle yet distinct smell of onions and peppers wafted in before she closed the patio door.

“Um, something smells good!” Darius said, handing her a glass.

Stacy just smiled. “So, I would like to toast us going to a new level. We’ve always known each other casually through Tanya, but here’s to us knowing each other as really good friends.” She hoped that sounded light enough. Although she wanted more, she knew nothing could scare a guy away from commitment faster than telling him that’s what you wanted. Better to try and stay loose and easy and, as things progressed, let nature hopefully take its course.

“To friendship,” Darius answered.
And friendship is the only thing I want
.

Later, Stacy’s succulent hamburgers and potato salad gone, and Darius pleasantly full, she pulled out the game she’d purchased for the weekend.

“I just got this,” she said, opening the disk. “It’s the latest X-Man. I’ve got Halo Two and some other ones, too.”

“Word?” Darius said. “I’ve been wanting to check that out.”

Stacy gave Darius the box and went into the kitchen to straighten up. Moments later, the noise began, both the game and Darius. “Aw, man. Got you, sucka!”

Stacy smiled. This is what she wanted, the sound of Darius in her house.

He glanced around and noticed her sitting on the couch. “Come on, woman! It’s time to take this beating I’m getting ready to serve up.”

“In your dreams,” she said, but only halfheartedly. She wasn’t very adept with the game.

“Oh no, you’ve got to get in on the action. Here, I’ll show you how to play.”

Stacy walked over and sat down on the floor next to Darius’s chair. He joined her on the floor, leaned into her, showing her how to work the controls. She was a fast study. While there was no way she was going to beat Darius that or probably any other night, she held her own enough to not be too embarrassed.

An hour and another bottle of champagne later, Darius and Stacy were still absorbed in the game, trash-talking the whole time they frantically pushed the controls. Darius’s level of play had slipped a notch with the third and then fourth glass of bubbly, and Stacy seemed to have found her niche in how to play rather effectively. As the game continued, there looked to be a real chance that Stacy might win.

“Watch out, Darius, watch out! Looks like somebody might get beat up!” She punched the button and took out another man, his ace.

“Oh, no you don’t.” Darius put his whole body into it, maneuvering this way and that as he navigated the game. He playfully pushed Stacy over, trying to leverage an advantage.

Stacy pushed him back. “Don’t think you’re going to distract me, trying to start a fight,” she said. “I’ll beat you on the TV, then beat your butt in the living room!”

They tousled back and forth, pushing buttons, laughing. Having grown up in a house full of boys, Stacy was a hearty competitor at anything she tried, so getting into a game that she had little personal interest in wasn’t difficult. The more she got into it, the more Darius enjoyed her. She really was like one of the boys.

And then something happened. Stacy, seeing she was going to lose to Darius for the umpteenth time, began tickling him. It was done innocently, only to try and stop his game. What she didn’t know was that Darius was extremely ticklish.

“Stop, stop that,” he laughed, trying to grab her arms and pin them behind her.

“Oh, you’re ticklish, huh? Where? There? There?” Stacy was enjoying herself, avoiding Darius’s hands while aiming for his sides. Darius rolled over on Stacy, stopping her with his body weight. Stacy struggled underneath him, trying to free herself from his grip. Darius stayed on top and finally managed to grab her arms. He held them straight out from her body. They both panted.

“Now, what do you have to say now, huh?” Darius held Stacy’s arms immobile out to her side. He looked down. Stacy’s nipples had hardened with her excitement, and protruded through the tank top fabric. Darius’s dick jumped. He paused, surprised. Stacy kept tussling and his dick kept jumping, getting harder. For the first time in a long while, he was getting a hard-on because of a female. This rarely happened, was one of the reasons his ex-wife had finally sought pleasure elsewhere.

Stacy noticed Darius’s grip had loosened on her arms. She’d noticed something else, too. He lay on his side, appeared to be thinking.
Probably about that bulge between his legs and what he wants to do with it.

Stacy chose to help him decide. She rolled them both over; now she was on top, he on the bottom. “You know what just happened,” she said triumphantly. “I won.”

With that, she leaned down and brushed her lips against Darius’s. She’d waited for this moment a long time and went slow, savoring the taste, the feel, the moment. She outlined his lips with her tongue, then kissed him on the mouth. She was excited, but tried to keep the mood light. “What are you gonna do now? Huh? Huh?”

Darius tried not to think, tried to just be in the moment. He’d planned this, had planned to kiss Stacy.
Just get it over, man
. He grabbed the back of Stacy’s head and pulled hers down to his. Then he mimicked her movements; outlined her mouth with his tongue and kissed her mouth. She parted her lips. He slipped his tongue inside.

Stacy was hot. This man drove her wild, he was fire! She plunged her tongue into his mouth, grinding her pelvis against his throbbing manhood. Her tongue made the same circular motions as her body as she tried to mold herself to Darius’s hard frame, leaving no space between them. She wanted him, all of him.
Go slow
. She didn’t want to scare him, wanted to keep it light. But her body had other plans. It was aching for release. Stacy tried to speed things up. She slid to the side of Darius and grabbed his dick through his shorts. She began rubbing the length of it; slowly, caressingly. Their kiss deepened even more as Darius fumbled underneath Stacy’s top. It had been so long since Gwen, playing with her breasts felt almost new to him. But they felt good, firm, not very big. And the nipples, they were small, beady, like Bo’s.

Bo
. Darius stopped the kiss, grabbed Stacy’s hand. “I can’t do this.”

These words were water on Stacy’s flame. She hadn’t had sex in months. She’d wanted Darius for so long, and he felt so good. “Why? What’s wrong?”

Darius’s throbbing penis was affecting his ability to think.
What is wrong? Why am I attracted to Stacy like this when I’ve never been attracted to women?
The champagne, he rationalized. It had to be the combination of that and the game and her one-of-the-boys personality. He’d felt totally comfortable in her company.

“We need to slow it down, that’s all,” Darius said finally. He lay on the floor with his eyes closed, trying to gather himself.

Stacy lay next to him, smoldering, like her grill’s charcoal. She couldn’t give up. When would she get the opportunity again? She didn’t want to scare him away, but she didn’t want him to leave without her feeling she’d done all she could to attract him either. She slowly reached out her hand toward Darius’s shorts. She undid the button and grabbed the zipper.

“No,” Darius began.

Stacy shushed him. “It’s okay, just let me do this. We don’t have to do it or anything, but just let me make you feel better.”

Darius said nothing. Stacy reached for the zipper again and pulled it down slowly. She reached inside.
Nice
. Stacy straddled Darius’s legs and took his manhood out of his shorts. She thought it was beautiful, curved and dark, a thick vein running from the base to the tip.

That’s where she started. She traced the vein with her tongue, slowly, leisurely.

Darius inhaled sharply. He had expected her to want to have intercourse, not this. “Head” was his weakness.

Stacy continued to lavish her attention on Darius’s penis. Darius moved and moaned under this targeted and undivided attention. Stacy’s eyes closed, she thought of nothing but pleasing Darius, of giving him the best blow job he’d ever had. And she did.

A week had passed since Tai heard the news that Tootie might have had King’s child. In that time, she’d looked at the situation from every possible angle. The only one that worked for her was King not being the father. But the more she’d thought about it, thought about how close King and Tootie had been, of how the time of the affair and the age of the child matched, and how quickly Tootie left town afterward…The chances that King was the father were much greater than that he was not.

Vivian, as always, had been understanding, sympathetic, and a voice of reason. “It was a long time ago,” she’d said. “It doesn’t change what you two have now.” She was right, technically. Tai couldn’t fault King almost twenty years later for a child he knew nothing about.

The affair
had
been totally his fault. She still remembered how devastated she felt, finding out King was having an affair at the same time she was carrying their second child. It had taken her years to release the anger, years to feel healed. And she could tell she had healed. Before, this news would have sent Tai on a rampage. She would have been a bellowing fool, maybe even a violent one. But this time, she had remained basically calm and basically rational. What was done had been done and losing her mind over it wouldn’t change anything.

Their marriage felt like a fortress, and this was definitely new. King and Tai had talked the evening she heard the news; talked, not argued. They’d discussed how best to handle the situation, how to confront Tootie. That definitely had to happen. If Tai was sure of nothing else, she was sure of that. God said the truth was the light, and nothing short of knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt that the boy was not King’s child, would allow the family to live in peace, to get back to a sense of normalcy.

And that’s what they’d decided to do tonight, find out the truth. King and Tai would meet Tootie at Miss Smith’s house. They’d ask the question. They’d hear the answer: simple, over, done. And then she could breathe again.

“Man, all you can do is what you’re doing. This wouldn’t be easy for anybody, let alone what you guys have already faced the past year. So keep your head up. It’s gonna be all right.” Derrick truly believed his last words were true.

“Yeah, we’re gonna know one way or another in just a few hours,” King replied. “It’s what’s best but not necessarily what’s easiest. If that child is mine…”

“Don’t forget your faith, King,” Derrick said. “I don’t have to tell you that with God, all things are possible or that faith moves mountains.”

“Yeah, but can it remove a child?”

“Faith will make finding out you have a child,
if
that’s even true, easier to handle, because you know that if God brought you to it, He’ll bring you through it.”

King paused. “Have you ever thought about becoming a preacher?”

Derrick smiled. “A time or two.”

King looked at his watch. He knew he should be leaving now to pick Tai up. They were expected at Miss Smith’s at seven o’clock. “Well, it’s about that time, brother. But listen, can you say a prayer for us?”

Of course, Derrick didn’t hesitate. “Let’s do it right now. Father God, we come to you this evening knowing that with your grace and mercy, there is no problem we can’t solve, no mountain we can’t climb, no river we can’t cross….”

“But, I don’t want to talk to them!” Janeé was furious. How dare her mother set up a meeting and then trick her into coming over. It would serve all of them right for her to leave right now.

“Rita Janeé,” Miss Smith said, wringing her hands. “It’s the right thing to do. I know you’re mad at me, but would you have come over if I’d told you why beforehand?”

Janeé responded with a scathing glare at her mother.

“You know you wouldn’t have. And this thing needs to be resolved. Now, all these years I’ve honored your request and not said a word about Kelvin. I haven’t bugged you about who his daddy is, although I’ve wondered many times. I’ve done all that you’ve asked. But now it’s time for you to do what I’m asking. It’s time to bring this situation into order. That boy deserves to know who his real father is, and the father deserves to know his son. Who knows? What you’re fearing so strongly may turn out to be a blessing.

“God don’t make mistakes. And don’t a soul come into this world that God don’t bless. So, for whatever reasons, Kelvin had to be born, and he had to come here the way he did. I know you’ve gone far away from your church training, but you’ve got to believe that God is
still
on the throne; ain’t nothing too hard for Him. Ha! I know that.” Miss Smith thought about the open-heart surgery she’d come through and got happy. “Hallelujah! There is nothing too hard for my God!”

Janeé looked at her mother. It really wasn’t her mother she was mad at. It was herself. This could have been handled years ago, when Kelvin was younger. But the more time that passed, the more Janeé believed it best to leave well enough alone. Then she’d met Hans and he’d adopted Kelvin and she’d hoped that would be the end of it.

That had been wishful thinking. She’d known all along that this day would come, and now it was here. No matter how much she wanted to avoid it, she couldn’t. And leaving would only delay the inevitable opening of this sixteen-year-old can of worms.

“You’re right, Mom,” she said, reaching for her phone. “But can you do me a favor? I need Hans here with me, but not the children. Can we ask your neighbor’s son to take you guys for an ice cream when they come over?”

Miss Smith didn’t want to leave. She wanted to be there for her daughter. But she knew it only right that her husband be by her side instead. “Of course I will,” Miss Smith said, walking toward her bedroom. “Just let me get presentable.”

Janeé punched in her husband’s cell phone number. Her heart beat faster with each ring. Having made the decision to confront her past didn’t make the moment easy. “Baby,” she said when Hans answered. “Can you guys come over? I need you.”

Forty-five minutes later, King and Tai knocked on Miss Smith’s door. Janeé started to answer it, but Hans placed a hand on her arm and rose to do it instead.

“Hello, come on in,” he said, opening the door. He held out his hand. “I’m Hans. You must be King.”

King stepped in and gave Hans a firm handshake. “Pleased to meet you.”

“And you must be Tai; Hans here.” Again, Hans held out his hand. Tai shook it and followed King into the living room.

Janeé sat on the couch, rigid and unsmiling. She didn’t bother to get up. With much effort, however, she managed to curve the corners of her mouth somewhat. “Hey, y’all.”

“Tootie,” Tai said simply. Ice had replaced the warmth of their meeting at the mall.

“Hey, Janeé,” King said, hoping the use of her current name would put some distance on their past.

“Hi, King.”

Hans motioned King and Tai to a loveseat. “Have a seat, guys. Can I get you anything to drink?”

“No, we’re fine,” Tai said, answering for the both of them.

Hans hadn’t realized until this moment that he would conduct the “meeting.” But being a corporate executive used to navigating shark-filled waters, it seemed the natural thing to do.

“Well, we all know why we’re here,” he began. “And I think the best thing to do is get right to it.”

Various nods and replies of agreement followed, and then silence.

Tai looked at Janeé. Janeé looked at Hans. King looked at Tai. Hans looked around the room, waiting for someone to speak. Finally, he turned to Janeé. “Why don’t you just tell them, dear?”

Why didn’t she just tell them? Janeé couldn’t understand why she was making this so difficult. The more she hesitated, the more the situation could get even trickier. If she could just lighten up, give them the answer they wanted, maybe everyone could go on with their lives. But then there was Kelvin. He wasn’t going to stop questioning her about his father. But that could be dealt with another day. Today, Janeé just wanted this over.

She grabbed Hans’s hand and tried to look directly at King and Tai. Instead, she looked just over them. “King, you’re not the father of my son.”

King visibly relaxed, sat back against the loveseat. He’d been taut with nerves, now he rubbed Tai’s shoulders as if kneading hers could make his relax. He wanted to jump up and do a holy dance. He wanted to shout hallelujah from the rooftops. He wanted to run over to Hans and slap him a high five. He wanted to kiss Tootie—well, maybe give her a big, bear hug. He wanted to take Tai and go home. It was over, he was off the hook. The boy was not his son!

“Of course, we’re relieved,” he said, once he got his excitement and relief under control. “Nothing against your son, I’m sure he is a great kid, but for so many reasons, whew, thank you, God!”

Tai should have been overjoyed, too, but for some reason the ending felt too something…too anticlimactic. If the child wasn’t King’s, why all the secrecy? Why wouldn’t she have told her mother, who she knew was close to Mama Max? This could have been over before it became a saga. And now here Tootie sat calmly saying King was not the father. She’d had them all tripping when the thing could have been nipped in the bud immediately, like when Mama Max questioned Miss Smith. And Tootie was not even able to make eye contact? What was up with that? Tai wanted to celebrate as much as King, but she couldn’t find the joy.

“May I see a picture of your son? What’s his name?” Tai asked.

“Kelvin,” Janeé said after a moment. “Kelvin Petersen.” She emphasized the last name as she reached over and squeezed Hans’s hand. “Hans adopted him when he was five and has been an excellent father figure in his life.”

“A boy sure needs that,” King said before turning to Hans. “That’s an honorable thing to do, man, take on someone else’s responsibility. You’re a good man.”

“He’s a wonderful man, a fabulous man,” Janeé said.

“Do you have a picture?” Tai asked again.

Janeé looked at Tai a moment. This is what she’d never liked about her. This holier-than-thou, I’m better than you attitude. Janeé had tried to be civil with Tai, but she just didn’t like the woman, never had, never would. Hadn’t she done enough? Marched her ass into her mother’s home like she owned it, demanding to know what wasn’t her business, and adding insult to injury by basically implying she didn’t believe what had been said. Well, fuck her. This party was over.

“I don’t mean to be rude,” Janeé said, “but I gave you the information you came for. And I don’t appreciate my word being questioned by your asking to see proof.” She stood, walked over to the piano, her back to the group. “I’ve said King is not Kelvin’s father. Let’s let that be the end of it.”

Tai looked at King, her temperature rising. Was it too much to ask to see a picture? But she knew this wasn’t about the picture. It was about the rivalry Tootie had felt with Tai ever since she came on the scene, ever since Tai became King’s official girlfriend. Tootie had never been official. She’d always been the other woman, the booty call, the good friend. The fact was, Tai had gotten King. And after more than fifteen years, Tootie still couldn’t stand it.

“Let’s go, King,” Tai said, standing up abruptly. “Tootie’s right. We’re done here.” She walked toward the door.

King stood up, unsure of why the atmosphere was suddenly crackling around him. As much as he loved them, he’d never be able to figure women out. Shouldn’t everybody be happy, in a celebratory mood? He was ready to pop a cork on some Dom Pérignon, and he didn’t even drink!

Not knowing what to say to either Tai or Janeé, he walked over to Hans, who was now also standing. “It was nice to meet you. Thank you for everything.” They shook hands warmly.

Janeé continued to stand with her back to them. “Take care, Janeé,” he said simply. And then they were gone.