Love Letters (12 page)

She covered her mouth when she saw Josh holding the big teddy bear he had given her before he left. His eyes were gleaming. “You still have this, Chloe?”

Why did I have to leave it on the couch?
“Oh, uh, I actually used to collect stuffed toys and thought it might be worth a fortune someday.” She flushed with embarrassment at the white lie.

Josh laughed. “You cried so hard before I left for Oregon that I thought this teddy bear would keep you company. Did you name him?”

He remembered.
“Of course he has a name. It’s Benjie.”

“
Benjie.” He bit his lip as though thinking the name over, and then nodded. “I like it. By the way I never got to ask you if –”

“
If what?”

He shook his head. “Never mind. So, you have the letters.”

Chloe frowned.
What did he want to ask me?
“Here you go, you read letters one to five and we can read letters six to eleven together.”

Josh opened the envelope and smiled at Chloe while she took a sip of her beer. She watched Josh in amusement as he read the first five. They were seated so close that she hoped he couldn’t hear her heart beating. She felt guilty that she wasn’t being truthful to Richard. She needed to tell him about Josh, but how?

“
Are you all right?” Josh asked, peering at her.

“
So where are you in the letters?” she asked, changing the subject.

“
I’m on letter number five.”

Chloe nodded and turned on the TV to distract her from his nearness. “So what do you think?”

“
It seems to me that they had a serious relationship. His letters get deeper and longer as the months go by.”

“
Okay, let’s read letter number six.”

“
Suzanne dearest,

Your letter today has given me great hope. How wonderful that you have decided to pursue your dream, despite your parents’ wishes. You’re quite a strong woman and I truly support you. It’s our dreams that keep us alive, especially for me when all I see is the ocean. Being an electrician on the ship allows me to use my hands, but if you ask me, I’d rather be an architect.

During my free time, I have drawn models of houses and buildings. Travelling around the globe has added a whole new perspective to my models. The more I’m aware of my dream and my willingness to pursue it, the more excited I get. At times, life may take us down paths we never wish to take, but I believe there is a reason for everything. Joining the navy has strengthened my dream, and has led me to you. It’s what I call, destiny.

You’re a wonderful woman, Suzanne, and though we only spent a very brief time together, I feel that I have known you forever. The captain has informed me that we will be back in San Francisco by December. By then, it will have been eleven months since we first met. I know it is too much to ask, but will you wait for me? I want to personally ask for your hand in marriage and take you as my wife. I love you too much to be apart. We can go to New York and pursue our dreams together, you as a Broadway actress and I as an architect.

I love you with all my heart and look forward to seeing you soon.

Faithfully,

Ignacio Rodriguez

June 1968”

Josh put down the letter and took a sip of his beer. “Man, this is heavy stuff. Who would have ever guessed that your mother would have experienced something like this?”

“
I’m sad that she never told me she was interested in Broadway. I don’t understand why she never pursued her dream.”

“
There’s probably more that we don’t know,” Josh said, folding the letter.

“
I’m sure there is. Would you like another beer?”

“
I can help myself,” Josh said, walking to the kitchen with Greta following close on his heels.

“
Okay, let’s read the next one when you come back.”

Josh returned, moments later, and sat closer to Chloe as she breathed his heavenly scent. “This is odd. Did you see the date? It’s September 1968.”

“
Oh no, that means that he didn’t write to her for three months,” Chloe said, counting on her fingers.

“
Either that or maybe she stopped writing.”

“
All right, let’s quit speculating and start reading.”

Her phone rang. “Hold on, it’s Nicole.” She punched in the talk button. “Hi, Nicole, how are you?”

“
Not too good. Mom received another letter reminding her about her deadline. She’s been on a crying frenzy, and she expects me to handle everything. I don’t know what to do.” Nicole cried.

“
Take a deep breath, Nicole. You know I’m always here for you and your mom.”

“
Thanks, but I can’t believe what’s happening. Did you talk to Richard?”

She didn’t want to lie to her best friend, but what was she supposed to tell her? “I know how you feel, Nicole. I told Richard about it and he said he’ll see what he can do.”

“
Is that Nicole?” Josh whispered.

“
Who’s over there?” Nicole asked.

“
Oh, it’s Josh. He came by earlier. We’re reading the letters to Mom from Ignacio.” Chloe turned away from Josh so he wouldn’t see her smile.

“
Huh? You mean Josh went there just to read those letters?” She snorted. “I don’t think so! He went there because he likes you.”

“
You’re funny, you know that?” Chloe laughed.

“
Hey, can I talk to Nicole?” Josh asked.

“
Nic, Josh wants to speak to you.”

Josh informed Nicole about his friend who had been through some program that had helped and told her he’d get more information tomorrow. He passed the phone back to Chloe.

“
I still think he likes you, Chloe,” Nicole teased, sniffing.

“
Whatever, I’m not going to argue with you.” Chloe giggled.

“
Okay, girl, I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“
Au revoir
.”

“
So shall we read the seventh letter?” Chloe asked, after hanging up with Nicole.

Josh opened the seventh letter. He seemed to be enjoying every moment he shared with Chloe.

“
Ever dearest Suzanne,

I am very sorry for not writing you for three months. It has been a depressing time for me. My mother passed away three months ago, due to a heart attack. It was very difficult for me to accept what happened, since I wasn’t there when it occurred. I have every reason to believe that I do not belong here. This job has taken me away from my loved ones. I can hardly wait until I reach America.

I hope you’re not angry with me for taking so long to write you. I was going through a grieving process, and needed time to think. I’m still trying to accept what happened. What hurts me most is that I never had the chance to say goodbye to her. I haven’t stopped thinking about you and how special our relationship is. I can hardly wait ‘till I see you again. In your last letter, you said you would wait for me and agreed to marry me. This means a lot to me, Suzanne.

Now, I lay on my pillow before I sleep, it’s your face I see. It’s your soul I long to be with. I know in my heart that we belong together. I can hardly wait to see you.

I will love you forever.

Un abrazo muy fuerte,

Ignacio Rodriguez

September 1968”

“
Boy is he emotional,” Josh said.

“
And very sentimental.” Chloe took a sip of her beer.

Greta licked Josh and stayed beside him as he opened the eighth letter. “This is a shorter one.”

“
Suzanne my love,

How are you doing? I hope you received my previous letter. I haven’t heard from you. I hope you have forgiven me for not writing sooner. Not a day goes by that I don’t think about you. Your eyes, your lips, your hair, your smile—everything about you is beautiful.

You are my inspiration. You gave me clarity and purpose to follow my dreams. More than anything, you gave me hope and love. My life has more meaning now because of you. There are so many things I want to tell you when I see you. We have a whole life to live, share and grow. My love for you is stronger than ever was. I can’t wait till we’re together again.

Please write to me soon. Your letters have kept me alive all this time. Your love for me has made me strong and patient.

I love you always.

Un besote grande,

Ignacio Rodriguez

October 1968”

“
Do you know what this means?”

“
What?” Josh asked.

“
He stopped writing her for three months, so she probably thought he wasn’t serious, and then she met my dad,” Chloe said, her hands folded together at her chin.

Josh was walking around the room, too restless to sit down. “Yes, but in his letter he explains why he stopped writing.”

Chloe stood up and began pacing the room beside him. “I don’t know, Josh. Maybe she gave up hope.”

“
She could have broken up with your dad and married this guy,” Josh said. “I mean it was clear that she loved him.”

Chloe shrugged her shoulders. “Yeah, but I know the way my mom thinks. She’s a realist. She had to make sure he wasn’t taking her for a ride. Maybe Dad was there at the right time and place. He was stable, and much older than her. Women back then needed their husbands to take care of them. What future would she have with this man, when they were both just starting out?” She could hear her mom’s words about Nina Taylor.

“
I agree with you, Chloe, but on the other hand, life is about taking risks and if she loved him, why did she let him go?”

“
Maybe she felt trapped, and had already committed to my dad. I know my mom; she would rather do what’s right than create waves. Her parents were very strict, and they wanted the best for her.”

“
I have to say, she did the right thing,” Josh said, gazing at her intently. “After all, you wouldn’t be here today if she hadn’t married your dad.”

Chloe could feel her cheeks flush. “Let’s read the last one.” Once again they settled on the couch.

Josh opened the final letter and out fell a photo so old and faded that Chloe could just make out Ignacio’s face. She looked at the back and read “November 1968.” It was a single photograph of Ignacio in his uniform, and probably the only photo Suzanne ever had. Despite the worn image, she could see he had olive skin and dark brown hair with a distinct cleft chin.
Very handsome.

“
Suzanne my love,

I haven’t heard from you in ages but when you receive this letter, our ship should be ready to dock in San Francisco. I hope you have received my previous letters and, as promised before, I will be there to see you. San Francisco is our last stop before the ship returns to Peru.

I wrote a long letter to my father about you, and our plans to go to New York together to pursue our dreams. I thought he would be against my plans, but instead he was happy and excited for me. Peru doesn’t have the opportunities America has.

My father gave me the number of a distant uncle who lives in New York and might be able to help me. My father has saved up enough money for me to go to college. I promised to pay him back, and told him to visit us in New York when we’re settled.

My three year term of service for the Peruvian Navy will be over by December. I have applied for a student visa to study Architecture in New York and just received the news that I’ve been approved.

It seems that we’re going the right direction. This is a whole new life for you and me, and I’m counting the days ‘till I see you again. We’ll be arriving on December 29 at dusk—the day before your birthday. I will wait for you at the San Francisco Pier from dawn ‘till dusk. I will have a red ribbon in my hat so you can recognize me. With luck, we will celebrate the first of many birthdays together. I look forward to celebrating Christmas, Valentine’s Day and every single day with you.

I love you forever,

Ignacio Rodriguez

November 1968”

“
Ignacio really loved her,” Josh said, reading the last word.

“
I know. It makes you think, doesn’t it?”

“
I wonder if Suzanne ever showed up,” Josh said.

“
Obviously not, because she would have ended up with him.”

“
Right, but do you think he went to New York and became an architect?”

“
There’s so much we don’t know. But I
do
know my mom didn’t become a Broadway actress.” She held a pillow to her chest. “I feel betrayed. Why didn’t she ever tell me? It’s like I don’t even know her. This probably explains why she’s been so bitter all this time.”