Love Her Right (3 page)

She swallowed the lump in her throat and whispered, “Mac...” then the car shot forward with such force she braced herself against the dashboard.

Mac was mad and as well as she knew him, she knew she would just enrage him further if she spoke. So even when he took sharp corners and braked hard she bit her lips shut to keep from screaming and prayed they got to wherever he was driving to at break-neck speed safely. She looked at the passing surroundings and realized they were on their way to sin city. Soon they got into the bustling city and stopped in front of a small building. It was a chapel. Before she could even ask what they were doing there, he was out of the car and she was chasing after him again, right up to the altar.

“Mac, what are we doing here?”

He didn’t answer, he just kept pressing the little bell insistently, his impatience apparent.

“Mac—”

“May I help you?” a man asked walking towards them.

“Yes, we are here to be married.”

Jolie gasped, staring at Mac’s profile. Those were the words she desperately wanted to hear from him, and yet he made it sound like the worst possible thing to have happened to him. She may have been desperately in love with him but she did have her pride. She was not going to be a curse in someone’s life.

“No, I’m not marrying you.” She quickly turned around to leave, but he pulled her back and she slammed into him.

“Jolie,” he whispered in her ear, his hand pressed tightly to her abdomen, “use your head. You could be pregnant, and I don’t want to leave you at the hands of your father when I join the Air Force.”

That made her pause. He was still going to join the military so that would leave her at the mercy of her father
if
, it was a big if, she was pregnant. It was embarrassing to know that Mac had noticed the cold manner in which her father treated her, but God, she didn’t want to be anyone’s burden.

She felt his hot breath on her ear and his body relaxed against hers, his hand opened to lay flat against her stomach. “I’m sorry I sound so angry. It’s not you I’m mad at...my parents just died and they aren’t here for this. They really liked you, my mom especially. My dad kept telling me to stay away from you until you were legal.” He tried to laugh, but it ended in a chocked sob.

Jolie felt ashamed. This time she was supposed to support him and yet... She turned around in his arms and cupped his face in her hands.

“Forgive me for being so thoughtless. I should have known you were angry and still hurting. It was just yesterday...” She raised herself on her toes and kissed him gently on the lips. “Come on. Let’s get married.”

The ceremony was short with very few smiles and the honeymoon too short for her liking. They spent the morning at their hotel room and headed back home by midafternoon. The entire way home she admired her wedding ring. It was Mrs. Masters’s wedding ring. The police gave Mac back their valuables that were recovered from the car crash. It wasn’t weird at all that a few hours ago the ring she wore rested on a dead woman’s finger. On the contrary, she felt honored by Mac. She wore his mother’s ring and he wore his father’s and she hoped his parents’ love would bless their own.

She wasn’t sure what she was expecting when they got home, but when he parked his car at his driveway and asked for some time alone, that wasn’t it. She wanted to know what happened next. Did she move into his house? Do they tell her family and when? The last thing she wanted was to pressure him, but she needed some answers. She decided to hold her tongue and went home. She was relieved to find the house empty, so she went straight to her room and fell asleep worrying about the future and Mac. Had they made the right decision by getting married?

When she woke up, it was Monday morning, the day to get her birth control pills. She stared at her wedding ring for what felt like hours, smiling like a kid in a candy store before she got ready and went downstairs. She was a little shocked to find the entire family still home. Even her father had stayed home from work.

“Are you just waking up?” her father asked as he walked past her.

“Yeah, I have a free period this morning. Why are you guys still here?”

Jake stood and followed their father out of the kitchen. “We were just saying goodbye to Mac. He left for training camp.”

Her heart jumped to her throat at that. Married and abandoned the next day.

––––––––

F
ive years later...

“Oh for fuck sake! You let him knock you up again!” Jase lamented next to her, pounding the news into her chest all over again, because that was what it felt like. Each time someone mentioned that word it felt like a hammer and a stake through her heart.

And yet she couldn’t summon the strength to be angry at Mac. How could she when she was dead inside. Two months ago he’d killed her, ripped out her heart, and stomped on it. Where would she draw the strength to be mad about being pregnant again when for the past few weeks she couldn’t summon the strength to show her son how much she loved him like she used to every day of his life, before his father came back into their lives. God, just getting out of bed and continuing her routine was exhausting. It had taken her next door neighbor to stress how easily Mac could take Miles away from her. Tara, Mac’s fiancée, would love for that to happen. She was a kindergarten teacher, and Jolie cleaned houses for a living. It was easy to see whose side the court would take. Well, they’d have to find out about her son’s existence first.

Yup, her life had turned to shit and it was all her fault. She should never have loved Mackenzie Masters as much as she did, as much as she did now.

Jase grabbed her arm and shook her. “Jolie, I’m talking to you!”

She turned to her twin brother. She’d seen him the previous summer and he looked nothing like he did now. His skin looked yellow and he was skin and bones and so weak and always so tired, the doctor thought it best that he stayed in hospital. Well, it looked like his life had turned to shit too. Both twenty-three years old, one with liver disease and the other pregnant with her second child by an asshole who enjoyed abandoning her, but it was still great to have her twin around. Ever since he graduated high school he spent all his summers with her and Miles and she loved having him. It made her less homesick having him around. Unlike him no one else in her family bothered to contact her, not even her mother besides the occasional letters.

“What do you want me to say?” she answered with a dry laugh.

“How the hell did it happen and don’t give me the birds and the bees shit,” he whizzed. The stress from her life was exerting him too much.

She placed her hand over his and pulled her lips in a smile, though she knew he’d notice it was insincere. “Don’t worry about my problems. We need to figure out how to help you.” She turned to the doctor. “How can I be compatible when we have different fathers?”

The day her father announced he was grateful he hadn’t sired a whore was still fresh in her mind, his angry voice ringing in her ears. That day, she learnt why her father hated her and that twins could actually have different fathers.

The doctor’s brows furrowed forming a deep V. He looked at Jase then back at Jolie, understanding finally setting in. She was glad she didn’t blush from embarrassment ‘cause seriously being knocked up again by a husband who didn’t give a shit about her seemed less embarrassing than admitting she was a bastard. The last time she bothered to think about the father topic was when the man who raised her put her in the hospital. She’d come so close to losing Miles, all because of him. He was the last person she ever wanted to talk about.

“Mrs. Masters, you and Mr. Simmons are full siblings—same mother
and father
.”

The first thing she thought was would she have to change her name from Masters back to Simmons once she was divorced? And then the part about having the same parents sank in next. It didn’t make sense. Then why did her father hate her so much?

Jase patted her hand. “Don’t think about that right now. Tell me how he knocked you up again.”

Jolie sighed. Jase was like a dog with a bone and he wasn’t going to let it go. “My cleaning company was hired to clean a house after furniture had been moved in. I and a few other girls got that assignment. I went in late ‘cause Miles’s ride to preschool was late, so I stayed last to finish up. When I was in the den, someone walked into the house and went upstairs. At first I thought I should call the cops, because there are so many psychos out there, but then I thought what if it’s the owner. So I went up to check and he was there and...it kind of just happened.”

The memory of seeing him standing in the middle of the master bedroom with just a towel around his waist was still sharp. Reason had flown out the window and all she could think about was being with her husband. She didn’t ask questions, didn’t say anything except for ‘I love you, Mac. I’m so glad you’re all right’. He’d tried to hold her back, but she was determined to be with him. He finally relented, kissing her hard as he ridded her of all her clothes. He’d thrown her on the bed, fell on top of her, then quickly entered her like he too had been waiting an eternity for them to be together again. It felt like the missing piece in her life was finally in place. There was no part of her skin his lips and hands hadn’t touched and it felt like a reawakening. It was like fireworks being in his arms again, having his skin against hers, his lips on hers and his body inside hers. She finally felt complete. Until the moment he’d mentioned Tara and wanting a divorce as they were both fighting to regain their breath. And just as fast as her hope went up, it came crushing down around her ears.

“I’m going to kick his ass!” Jase swore.

“You need a working liver to even raise your fist.” Jolie turned to the doctor. “Can’t we still do the transplant?”

He shook his head. “We don’t harvest organs from pregnant women. It’s too dangerous, for both the baby and the mother.”

So then there was only one option left to save her brother. It didn’t surprise her how easy she made the decision. It was just not normal. And yet she couldn’t bring herself to care how abnormal it was.

“How soon can you perform a DNC? I’d like my brother to have a piece of my liver as soon as possible.”

“An abortion?” Jase whizzed, pulling his hand away from under hers in disgust. “I’d die first before I let that happen!”

Jolie shrugged, wishing his words had moved her, but she felt nothing, she just didn’t care. “You might just get your wish.”

“Are you trying to use me as an excuse to get rid of that baby?”

Jolie leaned back in the chair and closed her eyes. “I just found out a few minutes ago that I’m pregnant. You make it sound like I’ve been planning this for days.”

“Either way, Mrs. Masters, this hospital doesn’t perform abortions. I suggest you get another donor, Mr. Simmons.”

Jolie opened her eyes and stared at the doctor. He looked as serious as he sounded. She turned to Jase. “Well, you do know what this means?”

He groaned shaking his head. “I haven’t spoken to them in four years.”

She closed her eyes and said, “Family reunion. Yippee! Just what I need.”

* * * *

J
olie opened the door and walked into her apartment, relieved at the silence. She couldn’t handle Miles’s energy at the moment because she was beyond exhausted. All she wanted to do was lay in bed. But...where was the babysitter? She walked into the room and immediately wished she could turn around and run out the door. But that would be useless. She was tired, and he was fast.

“Jolie, we need to talk,” Mac said holding up Miles’s baby picture. “Why didn’t you tell me I have a son?”

She dumped her handbag on the chair and moved into the kitchen. She reached in for a beer then put it back. She couldn’t even drown him out with alcohol. What did depressed pregnant women do when they needed a diversion from the shit their lives had become? She could eat. She pulled out her leftover birthday cake and settled herself on the couch.

“I asked you a question, Jolie!” he barked down at her.

She took a bite of the cake before she spoke. “Did you get my letters?”

At least he was man enough to look ashamed. She placed her cake on the table and went into her bedroom. Reaching under the bed she pulled out five shoe boxes packed with letters and went back into the living room. She dropped them on the floor and went back to the couch and her cake.

“Those are over four years of returned letters informing you of the birth of your son, each with a photo of him. Anymore stupid questions you’d like to ask?” she asked nonchalantly, putting another bite of cake in her mouth.

He fell onto the couch next to her, his elbows on his knees, and his head in his hands. She couldn’t help but admire him, his new body. While she’d grown frumpy, with a bird nest for hair, he’d actually filled out more, looking taller than his six-foot-three. She smiled at the memory of her concerned OBGYN when she was pregnant with Miles. He thought she had gestational diabetes until she’d described how big Mac was. Even now, Miles was big for his age, and she’d taken pride in telling those shocked by it that he took after his giant father.

But currently, she felt anything but pride for the giant.

“Why are you still here?” she asked bluntly.

He turned to look at her, his brows knitted together. “What?”

“I’m sure I didn’t stutter, and I’m sure Tara is waiting for you at your new home.”

Was that pain she felt in her chest? First she smiled at a fond memory and now she hurt just thinking about Tara in a home that should have been hers. Wow! She couldn’t even depend on her depression to commit long term.

“Jase called me.”

“Ah!” she nodded, “here to make sure I don’t kill your baby?”

He frowned sitting up, clearly hurt by what she just said. And yet again she couldn’t summon the appropriate emotion to even care.
Welcome back depression!

“Were you going to do it to spite me? I know you hate me, but why take it out on the baby?”

She chuckled. “So how long after your heart felt speech before you abandon me again? Because if you remember clearly, Miles was the reason we got married and you abandoned me right after you got your spousal rights. Something you seem to do to me every chance you get. Screw me, get me pregnant, and then leave me.”