Love Finds You on Christmas Morning (32 page)

“Yet that’s what you’re doing right now, while you stuff corn chips and my amazing salsa guacamole in your face. The poor girl is probably beating herself up even more now than she did the whole time she kept this information from you.”

Drew chuckled. “How did Nikki become the poor girl in this and I’m the face-stuffing villain?”

“Classic.” Phillip said the word to Drew and then a second of panic crossed his features.

Gigi simply cleared her throat.

Phillip set down his glass and kept his eyes on Drew. “Why did
she
say she didn’t tell you?”

“She said she always planned to but just never did. She seemed to be afraid it would cause conflict between us, no matter when she told me.” He sighed. “I don’t know. Maybe it would have.”

Gigi sat across from the men. “So, what now? You don’t want to end your relationship over this, do you?”

“No. But sort of, yeah. I’ve always been a big believer of open communication. This long-running secret bothers me.”

Phillip sat back and sighed. “Do you love her, man?”

Drew looked at him and then at Gigi. Their expressions were too knowing. He rested his face in his hands and nearly growled out his next word. “Yes.”

“Well, Drew,” Gigi said, “if you’re not willing to tell her good-bye, you’re going to have to use some of that open communication you believe in. And make sure you don’t confuse open communication with ‘This is how you made me feel.’ ”

He looked up at her. “What do you mean?”

“Honey, she
knows
she messed up. She knows she hurt you and your view of her. Now she needs to know she doesn’t ever have to hold back on you again because you care more about
her
than you do things like some dumb old house.”

And it hit him like a slap, what he needed to do. He knew the idea had to have come from the Lord, because not only was it probably the kindest thing he could do, but it was probably the least selfish. That kind of thought didn’t often come from his own stubborn heart.

“I talked with Laura,” Drew told Nikki. He stood at Harvey’s front door, his kind eyes a little less lively than usual. “I didn’t want to stop by while you were making or serving a meal for Harvey. She thought this would be a good time since Harvey had plans away from home.”

“Laura encouraged you to come by?” Nikki marveled at the continued positive changes in Laura’s personality.

Drew smiled. “She said you definitely needed a picker-upper in your day.”

Nikki chuckled. She felt a bit of a pick-me-up just seeing his smile. “Did she now? Well, come on in. I’m actually working in the kitchen, putting together a shopping list. There’s a table and chairs where we can sit. I’ll make coffee.”

He nodded, the small smile still there. He glanced around like a tourist as they walked toward the kitchen. “Gorgeous home.”

“Yeah. I’m sure Harvey wouldn’t mind if I gave you a little tour. I should have done that a long time ago.”

He didn’t immediately take her up on the offer. Maybe later.

She noted how polite and friendly they had both become as a result of the silent days that passed since their emotional argument after her parents’ dinner. One would never know, to look at them, that there was any conflict at all. Or significant emotional involvement of any kind, even.

But Drew put an end to that shortly after they were shut away in the privacy of the little nook in the kitchen.

Nikki scooped coffee into the coffeemaker, and Drew sat at the table. He looked at his joined hands on the table. “Nikki, I want to sell you the house.”

She lost count on the coffee scoops. She studied him to see if he was serious.

He didn’t look angry. Or sad. He looked determined.

“But, Drew—” She hardly knew what to say. She shook her head as if she had just come to.

“I’m sorry for the way I reacted the other evening,” he said. “I shouldn’t have lost my temper, and I apologize for the angry things I said to you.”

She started the coffeemaker and sat down across from him at the table. She wanted to place her hand on top of his but thought better of it. “I’m sorry I wasn’t up-front with you, Drew. I handled that so poorly.”

He put up his hand to stop her. “Let’s not dwell on it, okay? Let’s forgive each other and let it go. We can talk with financial people and our Realtors and figure out how to best handle the sale. And I’d need you to pay at least what I paid for the place. I mean, I sank a lot of money into the house on top of what I paid by just doing the remodeling, so I can’t really afford to cut you a break.”

“Drew, no. I absolutely can’t do that.”

“If you can’t afford it just now, we’ll wait until you can. I’m sure our financial people can figure out—”

“No, I mean, I can’t take your house from you.”

He sighed and looked up at her as if he were a father brooking no nonsense from his child. “It will never feel like my house, Nikki.”

She could have broken into tears right there. What had she done?

“Of course it will. Look, I meant it when I said I no longer stressed over losing the house. I know you have no reason to believe anything I say ever again, but
please
believe that.”

He nodded. “I do. I don’t think you’re dishonest. I understand now how awkward you felt about the circumstances between us and with the house. But I hope you can understand why I feel really uncomfortable now about living there. I see the place completely differently now. I’ve prayed about this, Nikki, and I’m 99 percent sure God wants that house to be yours.”

She didn’t want to speak out of emotion. He had a look about him she’d never seen before. Again, she would characterize him as determined. He seemed unshakable in his decision.

Well, she had prayed too.

“I’m not sure how to put this, Drew, but I’m 99 percent sure God wanted me to get over that house and enjoy your ownership of it quite a while ago. And I’ve been praying about this a lot longer than you have.”

He frowned and studied his hands again. Nikki noticed his hands weren’t just joined now. They were clenched.

“I’ve considered the idea of moving back to San Diego anyway. After my contract here is satisfied.”

She couldn’t help the tears that sprang to her eyes, and she suddenly had to talk around a swollen feeling in her throat. She got up and took her time in getting cream and sugar, and she took a stealthy swipe at a few tears that escaped. She spoke while looking in the refrigerator.

“Did—did I cause that idea?”

He sighed. “My father’s health, well, you know, it hasn’t been all that great. It might make sense for me to be closer to my parents right now. Or soon, anyway.”

She brought the cream and sugar to the table. “I understand that.” She licked her lips and sat back down. “But I’m still not open to taking the house from you. You said it would never feel like it’s yours.” She looked directly at him. “I feel the same way. I would never feel right about owning it now.”

“Why?”

He finally showed a little emotion, but it didn’t make Nikki feel any better. If anything, he was getting frustrated. She didn’t want this conversation to deteriorate as their last one had.

“Nikki, you can’t honestly tell me you weren’t duplicating the decor you remembered from when your great-grandparents lived there. I remember how certain you were of what would look good. Now I know why.”

She cringed. “Yes, I’ll admit I used my old memories for inspiration. But it’s
not
the same, Drew. It has your own touches. More modern touches. It looks like it once did but better.”

“If it’s better, then you should be thrilled about buying the place and bringing it back to the Tronniers. I’m sure your family will appreciate—”

“My family couldn’t care less. I’m the only one who ever set her sights on the place. And that was because of the happy memories it held for me. But now my memories would be about taking the house from you. I won’t do that. I won’t buy the house, Drew.”

She got up to pour coffee, but he stood along with her.

He heaved a great sigh. She thought she had finally won their argument.

“If you’re really sure.”

“I’m totally sure.” She nodded.

He walked to the kitchen door. “All right. Then I’m going to put it on the market in a few weeks, once the remodeling work is done.” Nikki gasped. “What? But why?”

“I meant what I said, Nikki.” He gave her a resigned smile. “If you change your mind, let me know right away, okay?”

Was this the end, then? Were they over? She wouldn’t have the strength to get out any words without a quiver in her voice—she could tell. So she simply nodded and said, “Mmm-hmm.”

She saw something shift in his expression in reaction to her wimpy little response. He walked over to her, slowly took hold of her hands, and leaned down to rest his forehead against hers.

He breathed out in some effort, either to keep from getting too emotional himself or to figure out how to let her down easily. She tensed up in dreadful expectation.

“I can’t say I know what to expect for us, Nikki. I think we both need to think about how we feel about each other. And pray. I think we could use some guidance right about now. Prayer would probably be a good thing.”

Well, that wasn’t
necessarily
good-bye. And frankly, he was right. She would have loved it if he had just walked over, taken her hands, and leaned down to kiss away the awkwardness between them. But the fact that she had felt unable to be frank with him these last several months, regardless of her reasoning—that said something. She wasn’t sure
what
it said, but she needed to figure that out and make her own decision about her future with Drew. Assuming such a thing existed.

Every day of the week after Drew visited her at Harvey’s, Nikki found a reason to drive past the Tronnier home. She had started to think of it that way again—the Tronnier home—now that Drew planned to step away from it. But she wasn’t driving past to see the house. She was hoping to see him.

Once she had accepted that he honestly planned to put the house back on the market, she actually wondered if she might talk herself back into an interest in it. Yet all she saw now was a lovely building that had caused a wedge between her and a truly beautiful man.

Of course
she
was what had caused the wedge, not the house. She had placed too much value on something she could touch and not enough on someone who had touched her heart in so many ways. Granted, she had never outwardly complained to Drew about her disappointment during the months they dated. Still, had she only known early on how important he would become to her, she might have casually told him about her family history with the house right away and headed off any conflict between them.

She had prayed, as he suggested. She had, at moments, felt a certain peace that everything would work out well. But sometimes she wondered if she was fooling herself about that peace. Maybe she wasn’t feeling God’s will at all, but simply her own wishful thinking. She trusted God, but she wasn’t so sure about herself.

Drew hadn’t been there any of the times she drove past. No one had, which made her think the remodeling work was probably done, or pretty close to it. Any day now that F
OR
S
ALE
sign would go up and they would lose one more connection between them. She could handle the idea of the house falling into someone else’s hands. But Drew in someone else’s arms? Not so easy to handle.

As she drove by this time, though, the house was full of activity. In fact, two of Drew’s workers were actually running out the front door and down the porch steps. They hadn’t even put on their jackets.

She turned her BMW around, went back to the house, and parked. As she stepped out of her car and approached, Drew strode quickly out of the house with a shovel in his hand. Draped over the shovel head was one nasty-looking snake.

Nikki had lived in North Carolina all her life. She would recognize those triangular markings and that rusty coloring anywhere. That was a copperhead. Very poisonous.

“Mike!” Drew called to one of the men outside. “Man up and bring one of those lawn and leaf bags over here. The thing’s dead now.”

Dead
now?
As in, it was in the house
alive?

“Did you kill it, Drew?” Nikki asked.

He jerked his head toward her. “Oh. Nikki. Hi. Didn’t see you there.” He looked back at the snake dangling limply across the shovel. “Yeah. It managed to work its way into the basement from somewhere, probably going after mice. I’m going to have to make sure an exterminator gets out here and finds the entryway before I put the house on the market.”

Mike approached with a large green bag and held it open for Drew to drop the snake in. “Good old Freddie was the one who found it,” Mike said.

As if on cue, Freddie slowly padded out of the house.

“Freddie!” Nikki approached the retriever—she missed him almost as much as she missed Drew. But something was wrong. He didn’t try to jump on her or even wag his tail. And when she ruffled the soft fur around his neck, she thought his neck felt swollen.

“Drew?” She turned and saw him tying up the bag and handing it to Mike, who carried it to the Dumpster at the side of the house. Drew looked over at her and finally gave her a smile.

She wasn’t in the mood to smile, though. “Did you know Freddie’s neck is swollen?”

“Is it?” He frowned and reached down to feel it. “You’re right, it’s—”

Freddie’s legs suddenly gave way, and he plopped onto the porch like a wild animal hit by a tranquilizer dart.

Both Nikki and Drew gasped.

Drew took the dog’s head in his hands and looked into his eyes. “He’s conscious. But I think the copperhead must have bit him.”

Nikki drew her hand to her chest. “Oh, Drew, they’re poisonous.”

He scooped his arms underneath Freddie and stood; the dog’s listless body hung heavily over either side. “I’ve got to get him to the vet.” He glanced toward the garage. “My car doesn’t have a backseat.”

“We’ll take mine.” Nikki had her keys in her hand. Her eyes teared up. “You can sit in the back with him.”