Love Enough For Two (Love Inspired) (13 page)

I
t had been nine days, ten hours and fifteen minutes since Matt had last seen Sierra. And he missed her desperately. He still couldn’t believe it had all been part of some offbeat game. A game devised for adults, not children.

Children.

Matt leaned back in his office chair and raked his fingers through his hair. Sierra had a daughter. That’s what had really thrown him for a loop. The other stuff he might be able to forgive, but forgetting to mention you had a child was big.

He’d never wanted to be a stepparent. Never. From what he’d observed in the divorce cases he’d handled, raising children that weren’t your own was a thankless task and a constant bone of contention in a marriage.

That’s why he hadn’t called Sierra. She loved her daughter and Matt knew they were a package deal.

“Mr. Dixon?” Rachel Easton, the new office receptionist, stuck her head inside the door. “Your mother is here and wants to speak with you. Are you available?”

Matt leaned back in his chair and nodded. “Send her in.”

One of the good things that had come out of his association with Sierra was his newfound relationship with his mother. After he and Sierra had parted, Matt had found himself with lots of time to think. And, Sierra’s words about forgiveness wouldn’t let go.

Finally, he’d pushed aside what remaining hurt and anger still lingered in his heart and called his mother back. They’d met several times in the past week and though the relationship was still somewhat strained, it was definitely on the mend.

“I hope I’m not intruding,” Janice Dixon waltzed into the room, a shopping bag in each hand. She was tall and stylishly slender, just like Tori, and remarkably attractive for someone in her early fifties. Her hair was cut in a short bob with highlights hiding whatever gray lurked in the blond strands. She reminded Matt more of a fashion consultant than a mother.

He rose to his feet and rounded the desk to greet her. “Of course you’re not intruding. Let me take those bags. Have a seat. I’ll have Rachel bring in some iced tea.”

“Sounds fabulous.” Janice handed Matt her bags and elegantly lowered herself into one of the two tall wing chairs that faced the desk. “They say it’s only seventy-eight outside, but it seems hotter than that to me.”

Matt placed the bags to the side and buzzed Rachel. In only moments, the pretty brunette appeared with two tall glasses.

Taking a seat in the second chair, Matt took a sip of his tea and waited for his mother to tell him the reason for her visit. Though he had no doubt she’d been in the neighborhood, he’d discovered that Janice Dixon was a planner. That meant this wasn’t any spur-of-the-moment visit. For whatever reason, she’d made a special point to stop by today.

She took a dainty sip of tea, then placed it on the desk. “I talked to your father last night. We had a nice conversation.”

Matt didn’t know what surprised him most, that she’d talked to his father or that she could label any conversation between the two of them “nice.”

“You look surprised,” she observed.

“I am,” Matt said honestly. “I didn’t think you’d contact him.”

She lifted a perfectly tweezed eyebrow. “There were things I had to say. Things he had to hear.”

Matt had heard the entire story of how she’d felt trapped and unhappy in her life as wife and mother. How she had a chance for a great job in Hong Kong but she knew Dix would never let the children leave the country with her. How she’d felt she had no choice but to leave them behind.

Matt had accepted her explanation because it was fact. But he couldn’t help but think about Sierra and how she would have handled the situation. He couldn’t imagine Sierra leaving a child of hers behind, no matter what the reason. Of course, knowing how she felt about the sanctity of marriage, he couldn’t imagine her ever getting divorced, either.

“Things to say?” Matt ventured when she didn’t immediately continue.

“I wanted him to know that while it wasn’t that hard for me to make the decision to leave, it
was
hard for me to stay away.”

Matt shifted in his chair. This was something new, something she hadn’t mentioned in their previous meetings. “Why did you then? Stay away, I mean.”

The smile that seemed to be perpetually on her lips dimmed. “Foolish pride. The feeling that I’d made my bed and I had to lie in it.”

“You
wanted
to come back but you let your pride stand in the way?” Matt’s voice rose despite his best efforts to control it. He didn’t want to judge her, that would be pointless, but he remembered all too well the loneliness that had been such a part of him all those years after she’d left.

“It’s harder than you realize.” His mother’s blue eyes flashed. “I wanted to call but I kept putting it off. It’s not easy to admit you’ve made a mistake and ask for forgiveness. Then, the weeks turned into months and the months into years and I figured it would be easier on all of us if I stayed away.”

“Well, it wasn’t easier on me,” Matt said, meeting her gaze, feeling the anger rise unbidden inside him. “Or on Tori. So the only one it was easier on had to be you.”

“I paid for it.” A flush swept across his mother’s cheeks. “Every birthday, every holiday, I wondered what it would have been like if I’d just made the call, if I’d just gotten on that plane, if I’d just…”

Her voice trailed off for a moment before she took a deep breath and lifted her chin. “But I didn’t. And I’ve learned that we have to live with the choices we’ve made, right or wrong.”

“What would you do differently now?” Matt asked, though it scarcely mattered. “If you could do it over?”

A sad smile flitted across his mother’s lips. “If I had it to do over, I never would have left in the first place.”

Sierra stared down at her chocolate-and-marsh-mallow sundae and sighed.

“Don’t even tell me that you’re not going to eat that,” Libby said. “That’s your favorite kind.”

“I don’t have much of an appetite.” Sierra lifted her spoon and dipped it into the mound of whipped cream topping the sundae.

“Maddie’s doing okay, isn’t she?” Libby’s eyebrows pulled together. “There’s nothing going on that you haven’t told me?”

A smile lifted Sierra’s lips. “Good as new. Mom and I took her to the doctor yesterday and he released her from his care.”

“I’m so glad.” Libby reached over and gave Sierra’s hand a squeeze. “You know I love the little munchkin.”

“I know you do.” Sierra topped Libby’s hand with her own. “You’ve been such a good friend to me.”

“I
am
a good friend,” Libby said, tossing her head. “Maybe even the best friend one could ever have.”

Sierra laughed and Libby’s lips curved up in satisfaction.

“It’s good to see you laugh again,” Libby said. “That split with Matt has had you down in the dumps.”

“I miss him,” Sierra said simply. It was an understatement of massive proportions. Every fiber of her being longed to see him, to talk to him, to hold him close. He filled her thoughts during the day and haunted her dreams at night.

“You still haven’t heard from him?” Libby took a sip of her strawberry soda and her eyes widened.

“Not one peep,” Sierra said with a sigh. “Not that I really expected to anyway. We’ve said everything there was to say. What’s left?”

“I still don’t understand what the big deal was. So you’re not me. He didn’t fall in love with me—”

“He didn’t fall in love with me, either, Libby,” Sierra interrupted. “Or at least if he did, he never told me about it.”

“Okay.” Libby waved a dismissive hand at the mettlesome detail. “He grew fond of you, then. Would that be a fair statement?”

Sierra nodded. Matt cared for her. That much at least she knew was true.

“So, what did it matter if your name was Sierra Summers or Libby Carlyle?” Libby asked. “Or if you had tons of money or—”

“No money.” Sierra filled in the blank.

“Exactly,” Libby said. “You’re still the same person.”

“Except,” Sierra said. “I’m divorced. And I have a daughter.”

Libby’s gaze narrowed. “You think this is all about the munchkin? He doesn’t want her?”

“He doesn’t even know her,” Sierra said. “But he’s never wanted to raise someone else’s kids. He said that to me before.”

“But anyone who knows Maddie loves her,” Libby said.

“That’s true,” Sierra said. “But Matt doesn’t know Maddie and he’s not going to give himself the chance to get to know her.”

“Then you’re better off without him.”

“I agree totally,” Sierra said.

But she couldn’t help but wonder if keeping her distance from Matt was the right thing to do, why did it feel so wrong?

Libby held Maddie’s hand tight in hers as they crossed State Street. “Aunt Libby has to stop by and pick up some important papers on the way to the store. Okay?”

Maddie looked up from the double-dip cone that Libby had just bought her at the Creamery and nodded, her little mouth closing around the top of the cone.

Libby cringed at the sight of the strawberry ice cream already dripping down the sides. She wished she would have thought to grab a few napkins. She quickened her steps and prayed Matt had some in his office.

The door dinged as she opened it and Libby swept past the receptionist without stopping. “Mr. Dixon is expecting us.”

Matt was on the phone when she entered the office and a frown crossed his face when he caught sight of a small child at her side.

A sense of unease coursed through Libby and she wondered if she’d made a mistake. It had seemed like such a clever notion. In fact, in the peacefulness of her home, the idea had seemed positively brilliant.

Just like she’d told Sierra, everyone who knew Maddie loved her. So, all she needed to do was to introduce Matt to Maddie and he’d love her. Then, there wouldn’t be anything standing between Sierra and Matt but pride and if she had to, Libby knew she could figure a way around that, too.

“I hope you don’t mind,” Libby said, “that I brought Maddie with me. Sierra is in class and I’m baby-sitting.”

Maddie looked up, her lips covered with strawberry ice cream. “I’m not a baby.”

“Of course you’re not, sweetheart.”

By now the ice cream was running down the cone and onto Maddie’s hand. In a few moments it would be on Matt’s thick plush carpet.

For a second, Libby wished Sierra were there. Her friend always seemed prepared for these types of catastrophes.

Matt pushed the buzzer. “Rachel, could you bring in some napkins, please? Right away.”

In only seconds, the napkins were in Libby’s hands, but it would take more than paper to remove the stickiness from Maddie’s hands and face.

“There’s a sink just through there,” Matt said, pointing down a short hall. “She needs her hands and face washed.”

Libby stared at Maddie for a long moment as if the thought had never occurred to her. “I believe you’re right. Why don’t you clean her up while I look through these papers on the Advocacy Center?”

Matt’s mouth dropped open.

“I can do it, Mr. Dixon,” Rachel said, and Libby suddenly realized the woman had never left the room.

“Thank you—” Matt began.

“I’m afraid not.” Libby shot the woman a polite, but firm smile. “I don’t know you and I don’t let Maddie go with anyone I don’t know. Mr. Dixon will have to take her.”

“Why don’t
you
take her?” Matt said to Libby. “And then, when you get back, you can sign the papers.”

Libby made a great show of glancing at her watch. “I’m afraid I don’t have time to do both. And you did say the papers had to be signed today?”

Matt stifled a groan. The Advocacy Center was heading into the homestretch and the cost had run over early projections. Stella had agreed to kick in the extra and that was the reason for Libby’s visit today.

“I’d like to review this document before I write the check,” Libby said. “I guess I could come back another time….”

“No, you sit right there and read,” Matt said, glancing down at the little girl. “I can take her.”

He gestured with his head down the hall. “Come on, honey. Let’s get your hands washed.”

But the child didn’t take a step. Instead, she moved closer to Libby, her blue eyes wide and large.

“It’s okay, princess.” Libby crouched down beside the little girl and shot her a reassuring smile. “Mr. Dixon is a friend of mine. And he’s your mommy’s friend and Reverend Carl’s friend. He won’t hurt you.”

The tightness in the little girl’s face eased and she held out her hand to Matt.

Though it was sticky, Matt took it without flinching. He couldn’t help but wonder why Libby felt it necessary to reassure the child that he wouldn’t hurt her?

Since she hadn’t really spoken much, Matt expected that they’d walk to the rest room in silence, he’d wash her hands and face and they’d return to his office. Easy enough.

But Libby’s reassurance must have worked because they’d barely taken two steps when Maddie started talking.

“My mommy is at school,” she said. “That’s why I’m with Aunt Libby. Next year I’m going to school, too.”

“Is that right?” Matt asked.

“Mmm, hmm,” Maddie said. “I’m going to be five next year.”

“Getting old,” was the only thing Matt could think to say.

He discovered she really didn’t need much encouragement to continue talking. In the short distance to the washroom, Matt heard about her mother’s new job, her grandmother’s cookies and a doll that had recently lost its head.

She was a cute little girl, he decided. Her blond hair, pulled back in a long ponytail and tied with a ribbon, was several shades lighter than her mother’s and though her eyes were blue, not green, she reminded him of Sierra.

“Aunt Libby got me a double-dip cone,” Maddie announced.

“That’s a lot of ice cream for a little girl to eat,” Matt said.

“I could have eaten it all,” she said, her blue eyes serious. “But it melted.”

She gazed down at her once-clean white top then lifted her eyes to him. “Mommy’s going to be mad.”