Love Came Back (a Pyro-Princess Design and Style novel Book 1) (3 page)

3

First Hit is the Hardest, Right?

Next thing I felt was my cheek blazing, and I was bracing myself on the floor on my knees cradling my cheek. “Mikhail, why-”, he stopped me mid-sentence by grabbing my hair and twisting it in his fist.

“Ah, Mikhail, that hurt.”

He brought my face close to his and leaned in to whisper harshly in my ear.

“I asked you to iron my clothes until they are slightly stiff. You see me with starched shirts.
These
look as if you didn’t care enough to even bother. They are like card board. You’ve seen my closet before, Siddaleigh. I color coordinate my shirts and suits.”

Color coordinate?

“But, Mikhail, you didn’t-ah!”

He stood up and I had to grab a hold of him as he dragged me up with him. I whimpered but it didn’t seem to register to Mikhail that he’s hurting me in the fury, fogged state he was in.

“Now, I have to take them to the cleaners. What a waste of time! You didn’t even fix them as I told you. You said you did. You lied to me, Siddaleigh. I must be asking too much of you too soon.”

His body relaxed and softened, but when he embraced me, I felt the stiffness in his groin. Did he enjoy being angry with me? That was really strange and made me feel embarrassed and awkward. I did my best to hide the strange feeling so it wouldn’t anger him further.

“I’m sorry, Siddaleigh. I didn’t mean to hit you so hard. Luckily for your face it was an opened handed slap or it might have left a bruise, or a black eye.”

I felt the terror creep into my body, but did my best to not to let him see. When he stated he didn’t mean
so hard
, did that mean he would’ve ended up hitting me someday? No way. I couldn’t believe it was true. He never acted but as a gentleman.

“I promise not to get so angry, baby. Look at your sweet reddened face,” he gently took my chin in his grasp and turned my face to see it better. “It’s only a little red. You might just want to call in tomorrow to let the sting and redness cool and fade a bit.”

Never had I ever had someone smack me before. Girl or guy. Not even my parents. I caressed my sore cheek as I looked at Mikhail meekly to see if he was planning something else.

“Go take a hot bath, babe. I’ll call in some dinner.”

“Thank you, Mikhail.”

Moving quickly, I walked away to the joining bathroom. Maybe this would be a one-time thing anyways. He changed his attitude when he saw the red of my cheek. Maybe.

♥

About a month after he hit me, was our first time being intimate.

I loved reading romance. Any kind of romance; teen, YA, NA, contemporary, erotica and historical. I pictured my first time to be sweet and gentle with Mikhail. I thought he would love my body but in reality, I think in the end, he only wanted his own gratification.

Mikhail took me out to dinner at a very nice restaurant. He was all things sweet just like before. So maybe all that hitting business was in the past. When we got home, he steered me into the bedroom first thing.

“Siddaleigh, we’ve been together for over seven months. I’ve clearly respected your wishes to remain a virgin until marriage and I’m so glad you waited this long. All nice girls should wait until they are with the one to make love.”

I went still as deer caught in headlights. I knew this would come up eventually. He
had
been very patient with me. He hasn’t hit me again. I ended up being nervous and shy.

In my heart, I didn’t think he was
the one
. He knew it, and I knew it, but I wanted to experience intimacy and Mikhail has been wonderful the last few weeks.

“You don’t want to let me suffer anymore, do you? I’ve been dying to have you, Siddaleigh.” Mikhail smiled his sweet, tender smile at me and started caressing my hips with firm hands.

He tugged me towards him and rubbed himself on me. This was a foreign feeling to me. Feeling a man’s hardness. When I tried moving away, his grip tightened and his eyes flickered with menace.

“You’re not rejecting me, are you?”

His yanked me back close to him and pumped his hardened jeans over my stomach.

“No, Mikhail. I’m just nervous. Feeling that part of a man when I’ve never felt it before just scares me a little.” I see his eyes sparkle when I mentioned being frightened by a man’s erection. No way was he happy when I was nervous and afraid.

His eyes gleamed and his smile was just a little bit sadistic looking. He quickly covered it up though by relaxing his features and told me not to worry.

“No worries, babe. It only hurts for a moment and then it’s very good.”

Mikhail proceeded to unzip my sundress in the back and stripped it from my body. My body was what some would say fat and unattractive. I was back to a size twelve though, with D-cup breasts. I hated society’s view of soft, full-figured women. I’m a short girl, only five foot four with a little more flesh on my bones. Nothing I was ashamed of. Mikhail never voiced any issues with me being the way I was so I figured who cares?

This was my first time and Mikhail was actually going to see me naked as a babe. But I guess me not caring was too pre-conceived, because Mikhail just had to comment on my body.

“Siddaleigh, I think you’re so pretty, but you’d be so damn beautiful if you lost a little weight,” he placed his soft- manicured hands on my bra-covered breasts and said, “but not here. You’re tits are a thing to be envied.”

Mikhail rubbed his hands all over them, then squeezed them together to hold them with one hand and reached with his other to undo the clasp at the back. My bra fell away and he quickly divested me of the rest of my under garments. My lace matching panties were shoved down my legs just a bit too roughly.

“Gently Mikhail,” I told him.

He paused and seemed to think about it. He turned me towards the bed and sat me down on the edge of the soft comforter. He stepped back and I watched him begin to undress himself.

His body was so beautiful and tan. Although I don’t think he went outside a lot, so he likely got a spray tan but it looked natural on him. There was no soft flesh on him. All taut muscle and his chest had a peppering of hair. For some reason, I really didn’t like chest hair. It was not a turn on for me. To save face, I kept quiet though.

His clothes were placed neatly on the ottoman a few feet away. He undid his belt and unbuttoned his pants. The motion of him sliding the zipper down, I could swear every sound of the teeth spreading was like an omen. Bad or good, I didn’t know, but I heard it so clear. Mikhail wore boxers, which I always wondered why men wore those, since it let all their guy junk just hang free. It was weird for me.

Mikhail strode back to me and my face was pretty much parallel with his angry looking hard-on. I just stared at it squeamishly. I’m as virgin as a girl can get but is it normal to feel so repulsed by sex?

4

What’s a virgin worth these days?

“Wrap your fingers around my cock, Siddaleigh.”

I looked from it-his erection-to his lust filled gaze and started to raise my hand to fulfill his demand.

Hugging his penis around with my fingers, I thought it would have been bigger. I remember being around Konner and when I felt his, you know, it certainly felt huge. Maybe this was just average size. Then I figure, how the hell should I know? I never seen one up close, but I sure as hell thought men were bigger.

I wasn’t complaining though. If I had to have sex, his package didn’t seem too bad to take inside of me. My fingers wrapped around him snugly, and he told me to move my hand up and down the length.

I did as I was asked and a bead of fluid came out of the tip. I was a little shocked but happy because I think that meant I was turning him on.

“Lick it off me, Sidda. Clean me.”

My eyes widened when he said that. He put a hand around the base of my neck and brought my mouth to his veiny, hardened tip and repeated himself. I couldn’t bring myself to do it, so he just covered my hand with his and smeared it around my lips.

“Use your tongue, now.”

His voice seemed tense so I obeyed. The taste of him was salty and made me think of old salty French fries too long in a fryer. Or stale potato chips. Weird, but I learned then that I didn’t want to please him this way.

Mikhail told me to relax my jaw, and as I was barely opening my lips, he started bringing my head over more of his member.

“Suck on it for me, baby. Wrap that hot mouth on my cock.”

His words didn’t help turn me on. I wanted to say no, but I didn’t want to go this far just to have it stop. I didn’t know if he would get angry.

I moved my head as he wanted and it only made me think of a bobble head. I wanted to laugh but knew it wouldn’t be wise. I made a few suction motions and that made him tightened and tense up. He felt harder and a groan escaped from his throat as he told me to take more of him. I felt him slowly thrusting himself deeper and I felt it in my throat.

“Damn, you don’t have a gag reflex. So good Sidda, suck it deep. All the way.”

I braced my hands on his thighs to steady myself. He was holding my head firmly but not painfully and pushed his erection to the back of my throat.

Not knowing if this was good or not for him I just let him continue his ministrations, “Such a good girl, Siddaleigh. Your mouth feels so damn good.”

My eyes stung just a bit with tears as he relentlessly ‘fucked’ my mouth. He kept telling me he liked ‘fucking’ my mouth. I never heard oral sex be called that but when he said it, it sounded dirty and vulgar. My jaw was growing tired and weak but luckily it wasn’t long after I began tiring that I felt warm liquid bursting in my mouth.

“Swallow, Siddaleigh.”

I didn’t want to, since it felt and tasted nasty. I did though because I could see his eyes harden, and his hands stayed clenched where they were. One on my neck and the other around his penis. When he finished, he was still semi-erect.
Really? He wants more?
I felt a little abused and kind of used but in some twisted kind of way I didn’t mind making him happy.

When Mikhail looked down at my face and noticed the few tears that fell from my eyes he said, “Don’t cry, Sidda, you’ll get used to it. Don’t you worry, baby.”

He brought me to the middle of the bed and I laid down on my back to watch as he reached for his dresser and pulled out a condom.

Climbing on the bed, he rose over me to straddle my thighs. Mikhail ripped the wrapper and the latex was slowly rolled onto his shaft. He brought his erection to my opening and rubbed his penis back and forth. I grew tense at the feeling. He gripped my hip with one hand and put pressure so I would still myself.

“Calm down, it’s going to feel painful at first but it’ll only hurt a moment.” He pressed his hardness inside me just so and I could feel where the barrier met his tip.

“I might have to push in hard to get through your virginity. You’ll adjust and it’ll feel much better.”

I held myself still and did my best to relax.

“That’s it, baby.”

Holding himself at my hymen was making me uncomfortable. I wanted him to just get it over and done with. Mikhail looked at me, braced himself on his knees, and put the hand that was clenched on the sheets to my collar bone. He smiled and nodded to me telling me he was going, in which I just smiled attentively and returned it with a nod for him to continue.

He held me down rigidly and he just rammed his erection through my untried flesh to the hilt. I cried out in sudden pain. “God, Mikhail that hurt. Why did you do that?”

His grip on me tightens lightly and he pulls out almost all the way and shoves himself back in.

“It’s your first time, Sidda, it’s supposed to hurt. Your tight little cunt feels so good on my cock.”

I never heard that word before and I didn’t like it. Sounded so dirty and wrong coming from him. He continued his jack hammer movements and I felt like weeping and shoving him off me. But the intensity in his features made me stop and I don’t want him mad at me again.

Is this how all first times go? Hard, harsh and without a care? No book I’ve ever read ever described it like that. I thought flowers, love, softness and tender care was what happened the first time. This was so much different. In the back of my mind, I wondered if I had waited for Konner, would it have been the same?

I let myself lay there and breathed through the pain. Within ten minutes of strenuous thrusting, Mikhail’s face contorted into something new and he looked down at me with a smirk. The palm that was at my collar bone had ended up to my throat.

“Oh yes! That felt so good. This pussy is all mine, right, Siddaleigh?”

I just nodded in acquiesce and I could feel the few tears I tried holding back slip down the side of my eyes. My vagina felt really sore and when he pulled out of me. I whimpered at the discomfort, and cried out.

“I’m going to get cleaned up. Take these blood stained sheets with you on the way to your own bedroom and bath to clean up.”

I couldn’t help the wide eyed stare I gave to him in astonishment.

“But Mikhail, you have someone who does the linens and things like this, Can’t this wait? I mean, I just gave you my body, I need to-“

I didn’t even get to finish my complaint when he strode over to me and back handed my cheek.

“That blood came from you, so I expect
you
to clean it tomorrow and have them rewashed with the other linens when the laundry broad comes.”

With that, he stalked to the into his master suite bath room and slammed the door so soundly it made me flinch. I hurried to strip the mattress from his bed and I saw the evidence of my lost innocence. I felt disgusted with myself.

I was still naked as I quickly made my way to put my clothes and linens just outside the door and grabbed a fresh set from the nearby linen closet in the hallway to make his bed. It took all of ten minutes, in which he was still in the bath room, thank God.

I made my way quickly to the room he said was mine when he didn’t want to sleep beside me. At first, his explanation confused me, but I am so thanking God now for the reprieve this has given me. My cheek was burning and I knew tears were streaming down my face.

Luckily for me, the room also has an en suite, with a claw foot tub, which I
love
, and just the other normal bathroom stuff. Toilet, vanity, and sink. Closing the door to the bathroom, I put the sheets on the toilet and inspect myself in the mirror.

I was shocked to see a bruise marring my collarbone and hip from where he held me. My face was red and started to swell. Not from the hit either. Mostly from the crying. The space between my legs felt raw and made me whimper out in pain. I slowly turned around to turn the water on for a shower. I stood under the hard, heavy and blistering water and thought about what just happened.

I did not like that. Tears streamed down my face and I began to sob uncontrollably. My heart clenched like a fist. I punched the wall a few times to try and get out the anger I was starting to feel. I mean, who does that to a girl for their first time? I felt like screaming and I took my loofa and began scrubbing at my body to get the feel of him off me. I took gentle turns on the tenderness between my legs and came away with blood. I just stared at it for a time. All that time waiting? The differences I could feel in my body, made me finally feel ugly.

I must have been standing under the spray for a good amount of time because when I felt all cried out, the water started getting cold. Stepping out, I went to the vanity and wiped a hand across the mirror. My face felt puffy, and exhausted. I walked back to the bedroom and stumbled into my robe. I left the virgin stained sheets where I dropped them in the bathroom, and went back to Mikhail’s room. Surely, he would like to lay beside me and cuddle with me. Especially after tonight. I mean, couples cuddle and like to spend the night together, right?

I opened the door to his room and he’s lying on his back, wearing silk bottoms watching one of the scary thriller movies he loves so much.

“Sidda, what are you doing back in here? We finished and I want time to myself. It’s late and you need to rest. I intend to be pleased just like this every night or as much as possibly when I am here. So I need you well rested. So go back to your room and do just that. Now.”

His hard eyes made me obey quickly. I quietly went back to my room, and just gazed unseeingly.

Dear God in Heaven. What have I done?