Love by Design (Crystal Falls Book 1) (21 page)

“Are you sure he wanted it? You’ve told me a dozen times how awful this woman is. You really think Noah would go for someone like her?”

Lily blew out a breath and stood back up to pace again. “Who knows what that jerk will do. He probably made up the entire story about Rick being the one to sleep with that girl. That’s what he told me, you know. That it was all Rick’s fault at the lake. And now I’ve caught him at it again. I should have known.”

“That could be the case,” Rachel said and took a sip of her wine, grabbing another cookie off the tray that Lily hadn’t even touched yet. “Although, I’ve known Noah a long time. And so have you. It doesn’t really sound like him. Isn’t it possible that he’s telling the truth?”

“Who’s side are you on anyway? Jeez.” Lily sat down and gulped the rest of her wine. Rachel eyed her warily as she grabbed the bottle and poured herself a very full second glass.

“You know I’m on your side,” she replied and gave Lily a pat on the shoulder. “I just know how much he means to you. I don’t want to see you go through this again.”

Lily sat back against the couch and Rachel continued. “I know you’re angry right now. And it’s hard not to see Noah as the bad guy. But just hear me out a minute. You really think he would try to woo you again after all this time, propose to you, build you a house for crying out loud, just to cheat on you with a client? It doesn’t really add up.”

“I don’t know, Rachel. Maybe. But, then, what if you’re wrong?”

“It’s been known to happen.”

Lily finally reached for a cookie.

“Did you talk to him after this happened? Or did you just run away.”

“I ran,” Lily replied through a mouthful of cookie.

“Well, maybe you should give him a chance to explain himself.”

“Aargh!” Lily cried out finally, making Rachel flinch beside her. “Why do you have to be so reasonable? I just want to be angry right now! You’re making too much sense.”

Rachel shrugged. She wasn’t about to give in to Lily’s tantrum. “Maybe some sense is exactly what you need. Maybe if I’d talked more sense when you two first broke up you wouldn’t be in this ridiculous situation you’re in now.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Lily asked, her eyes narrowing.

Rachel sighed and got up from the couch. She didn’t want to be anywhere within hitting distance when she said it. “I thought you were making a mistake breaking up with him in the first place.”

“Why didn’t you tell me that months ago?”

“Because you seemed like you didn’t want to hear it. Just like you’re acting now.”

Lily shot up from the couch, a little wobbly now that the wine had begun its work. “I don’t have to take this.” She grabbed her coat and headed for the door. Rachel just shrugged.

Lily turned before she walked out. “What kind of a sister are you to be so awful to me when you can see how bad I’m hurting?”

“A sister who cares about you,” Rachel said simply.

Lily left, slamming the door as she went. Rachel sighed, glad she hadn’t brought out the second bottle of wine.

Noah was in a panic as he raced down the mountain. He debated whether he should go to Lily’s place or not. He doubted she would let him in.
Just like she isn’t answering my calls
, he thought as he hung up the phone yet again.

He wasn’t going to give up like the last time. More than anything, Noah wanted to find Lily and explain. How could she think that he would be voluntarily involved with Christina? They’d talked many times about how horrible she was. Surely Lily had to know that what she thought she saw at the cabin wasn’t the whole story. It suddenly felt like the lake all over again. Why couldn’t the insufferable woman just trust him?

He had to go to her, at least try to see her. He decided to take his chances and he headed to her apartment.

He didn’t see her car in the parking lot when he arrived but that didn’t stop him from hopping out of the car and banging on her door.

“Lily!” he cried through the door. “Lily, please, open up and talk to me.” He raked a hand through his hair and tried to peer into the window but the shade was closed.

A couple of heads poked out of neighboring apartments but he ignored them. Pride was overrated when it came to losing the woman he loved.

He pounded a few more times with no luck and decided to wait in his car. Maybe she hadn’t been home yet. He would wait as long as it took to see her. He wasn’t about to let her go without a fight again.

He settled in with his cell phone and an eye on the parking lot entrance. He tried to call her again but she still didn’t answer. “Lily, please call me back. I know you’re mad but please, I’m begging you, give me a chance to explain. It wasn’t what you thought. Call me back.”

Finally after about an hour of obsessively watching the parking lot, he saw her red car pull in and his heart began to thud in his chest.

He was out of his truck before she’d parked. He wasn’t going to give her the chance to run away from him again.

When she pulled into a spot he leaned against her car and gave her the most pleading look he could manage, somewhere between a puppy-dog and a man with a broken heart.

She stared ahead stiffly, not meeting his gaze.

He tapped on the glass and she sighed. She rolled down the window a fraction, still not looking at him.

“Lily, please. I just want to talk to you.”

“What if I don’t want to talk to you?” she replied hotly, turning her fiery gaze on him finally. “Why does it always have to be about what you want? You want to get back together. You want to get married. What about what I want?”

“Well, what do you want Lily?”

She frowned at turned to look out the other window.

“I don’t want to be hurt anymore!” She nearly cried as she said the words and slapped her hand down on the steering wheel, making him flinch.

He put both of his forearms on the top of the car and leaned his head down. “Will you at least let me in? The whole neighborhood’s watching.”

She ignored him.

“I don’t want to be with someone if it means having to always worry if he’s with another woman. Is that too much to ask?” she said.

“Of course it isn’t.”

She unlocked the doors and then folded her arms across her chest. He went around to the passenger side and slid in beside her.

“Lily, you have to know I didn’t want to be with Christina. The damn woman forced herself on me. She’d just knocked me onto the bed when you came in. I only want to be with you. I promise.” He slid his hand over her thigh and she pulled away.

“How am I supposed to believe you after what happened before?”

“What happened before was a misunderstanding. Just like this is.”

“A bit of a coincidence, don’t you think?”

Noah shrugged. “I guess you could see it that way, if you didn’t have any faith in me. But the situations are very different. Lily, come on. You know me better than this.”

“Do I?”

He let out a frustrated breath. “Look, I can’t go through this with you again. Either you have the courage to trust me or we can’t be together. I haven’t done anything wrong and I’m tired of being treated like I have. There aren’t going to be any more second chances, Lily. This is it. I want you more than I can say with words, but not if it means constantly worrying that you might decide I don’t deserve your trust and turn on me. I just can’t take it anymore.”

She was silent a moment before wrapping her arms around herself. “I don’t know what to say, Noah. I want to believe you. But I just can’t right now. I need some time and some space.”

He frowned but nodded. Opening his own door, he reached over a brushed his fingertips along her cheek. “Don’t forget that I love you, okay? I’ll always love you, no matter how you feel about me or what you decide.”

Noah leaned over and kissed her cheek before sliding out of the car. He stood where he was a moment, trying to catch his breath and finally walked toward his truck. He felt her eyes on him as he went and turned once to meet her gaze before sliding into his seat. It was going to be a long night.

Lily knew she needed to decide what to do about Noah. Just as pressing was figuring out how to handle her client and the job. She felt like she could never see the cabin again. The job was almost finished and it broke her heart to think of jeopardizing her entire business for something so stupid, but it felt like her only option was to call and quit.

When she walked into her apartment though, the only thing she could do was crawl into bed and curl up under the covers. She’d cried enough in the last few hours that no new tears would come. But life just seemed too heavy all of a sudden and she couldn’t handle anything more than sleep.

She awoke early the next morning, still in her clothes, the stale taste of sleep in her mouth. She felt like she had a hangover even though she’d only had a little wine at Rachel’s the day before. She pulled herself out of the bed and made her way to the bathroom, shocked at her own face still puffy from crying, her hair standing up in every direction.

A long soak in the bath helped ease some of the tension in her body and when she finally emerged, clean and relaxed, she felt much better.

She moved to the kitchen and made herself a cup of coffee and some toast as she thought about everything that had happened the day before. The thought of Noah made her heart twist, so she skirted him and began mentally working through the trouble that was the cabin as she sat down to eat.

As crazy as it seemed, the only thing that made sense to her still was to quit the job entirely. She knew she couldn’t keep working for Upton. Even though the job was nearly done, it would be too hard to put it all behind her. She couldn’t trust herself not to deck the woman if she ever saw her again. Couldn’t trust herself not to want to burn the whole place to the ground.

She still had the things from Francis’ shop in her car. She would have to take those back, maybe tell Lydia they were there. She certainly wasn’t going to take them up to the cabin herself. And then there was the headboard. But Isaac knew the delivery address and date. Surely Lydia could arrange to be there or have someone else there to make sure everything got completed smoothly.

She’d gotten a fifty percent advance at the beginning of the job and figured she could at least keep that much, seeing as she’d done nearly all the work. She might even be able to convince Lydia to give her more. Although she knew her chances of being recommended would be shot to hell. Word would spread quickly amongst the rich circles - she would be lucky to ever get a design job again.

The thought of that froze her. Was it really worth all this? Could she truly let Noah destroy her like this again? And what about his plea that she come back, marry her even? Was she going to be able to forget all of this and be with him again? Or had they gone beyond the point where she could ever forgive him?

Just the thought of him made her want to crawl into bed again. She doubted they would be able to go back now. She had been so ready just the day before to marry him. The house, the proposal, the amazing nights they’d shared recently, it had all been a mirage. She couldn’t really trust him. And that was the hardest thing to admit of all.

Finishing her coffee, she knew what she had to do. She took a deep breath and dialed Lydia’s number.

“Just the woman I was hoping to talk to,” Lydia answered on the third ring.

“Hey Lydia.”

“What is up my girl? I’ve been trying to get a hold of you. We are so close to the finish line here. Christina called me yesterday and told me to get everything wrapped up quickly. Tell me you’re almost done.”

“Actually,” Lily said, taking a deep breath and gripping the side of the table, “I’m calling because I’ve decided to quit.”

It was the only time she’d ever heard Lydia go silent. Seconds passed without a sound from her and Lily could hear her heart beating in her ears.

“Okay. Tell me what’s going on,” she finally responded.

She debated lying to her, making up an illness or something. The whole thing suddenly sounded so silly.

“I caught Noah in bed with her yesterday and I just can’t even think about going up there again.”

“Oh, honey.”

“It was awful, Lydia. I walked in the bedroom and she was sitting right on top of him.” The sting of fresh tears tensed her eyes and she brushed a hand over them.

“And you think Noah was in bed with her willingly?”

“Why not? It sure seemed like it to me.”

Lydia was silent another minute, this time gathering her thoughts. “I just know how Christina is, that’s all. She’s done this kind of thing before, you know. Hit on a contractor at a beach house we did a couple of years ago. There was a huge scandal when the guy’s wife found out. He wasn’t the only one either.”

Lily silently bit her lip.

“If I had to guess, what’s more likely is that she threw herself on him, attacked him even. You would not believe the shit I’ve had to deal with for her. Not to mention it’s hard to imagine Noah going for her when he’s so enamored with you.”

“Just because he’s showing a little interest again doesn’t mean he’s enamored with me. He probably just wanted to get in my pants.”