Authors: Lori Foster
“Will do.” He dropped his voice. “But get her out of here. She looks ready to jump out of her skin.”
Because he’d seen her naked. Not that he’d share that with his brother.
“Right.” Evan called to Doug, and as the dog came to him, Cate followed. “Let’s go, guys. Time to settle down for the night.” Together they crossed the hall to Evan’s apartment.
“It’s been like musical chairs today,” Cinder said. “Except we’re playing with apartments.”
Unable to take his eyes off her, Evan got her inside and locked the door. Doug made a beeline to his usual spot in front of the couch. He circled twice, tightening with each turn, then plopped down with a relieved sigh, his nose very close to his rump. Cate sprawled on her back next to him, pawed his muzzle lazily and closed her eyes.
“Looks like they’re exhausted,” Evan said.
Cinder smiled. “And so precious.”
She was precious, too. Keeping his hands to himself wasn’t easy. “They love each other.”
“I know.” She dropped her purse and went to sit on the couch. Head back, legs straight out in front of her, arms flopped at her sides, she let out a long breath. “God, what a day.”
With any luck, Evan would help her have a much more peaceful night. Whatever it took…he just had to keep reminding himself that tonight was for reassurance.
Tomorrow…tomorrow he could start an earnest pursuit.
After better cleaning the blood off his face, and then blocking his patio door with a broom handle, Evan sat down beside Cinder. At his nearness, she felt her face heating once more. It didn’t help that he kept staring at her so intently, making her feel naked all over again.
Even while wedging that broom into place, he kept looking back at her. Since seeing her buck-ass, she doubted ten seconds had passed without his gaze roaming over her.
“What’s it to be?” He took her hand, ran his thumb over her knuckles.
Such a simple touch, not any different from the way he’d touched her many times.
But that was before she’d lost a towel in front of him.
“Bed,” he asked low, “or a little TV so you can unwind?”
Ho boy. She had a preference, all right, but she didn’t dare share it. It took all her concentration not to curl up as close to him as Cate had to Doug. “Maybe a little TV?”
“Okay.” He used the remote to turn on the set. “Anything in particular?”
Noise. That’s all she needed. Some way to block the memory of losing that towel, the image of his hot gaze roving over her in shock.
Her throat tightened. “Doesn’t matter.”
“Ooookay,” he said again, this time stretching out the word. He turned on an old movie and, still holding her hand, slouched back comfortably on the couch.
Not once did he look away from her. She became far too jittery.
“Cinder?”
“Hmmm?” Oh geez, that sounded way too loud, with forced cheerfulness. She cleared her throat. “Yes?”
“I told you to stay locked in the bathroom.”
She snorted before she could think better of it. “It was my apartment.” Someone had come into her home. Someone with nefarious intent. She barely contained a shiver of dread over what might had happened. “I couldn’t just hide.”
“You could have stayed safe.” His voice dropped to a rasp, his attention like a warm caress. “You didn’t have to jump into the middle of things.”
“I wanted to get that gun so he couldn’t use it.” There’d been no time to think. She’d taken one look at Evan tussling on the floor, blood on his head, Doug far too vulnerable, and she’d known she had to do something. Fast. “I didn’t want to take a chance on him shooting you or Doug.”
He lifted her hand to his mouth and pressed a warm kiss to her knuckles. His mouth lingered, his breath hot, soft. “It was a brave thing to do.”
She felt a tingle clear down to her toes. “
You
were brave. I just sort of went blank and reacted on instinct.”
“Mmm.” His mouth moved over her knuckles again. “And lost your towel.”
Was that supposed to be news to her? She pulled her hand away and frowned at him.
“You keep staring at me.”
“And you keep trying to ignore that I’m staring at you.” He caught her hand again, tugged her closer and into his side. “But that pretty blush tells me you’re plenty aware of me.”
Her face got hotter still.
“Why are you embarrassed?”
She tipped her head back to give him a disbelieving glare. “Seriously, Evan? After all that, you have to ask?”
He frowned now too, but more with determination than annoyance. “I want to give you plenty of time. The rest of the night, and all of tomorrow too, if you need it. But you might as well understand right now, there’s no going back.”
Some special meaning infused those words, stealing her breath. “What is that supposed to mean?”
“We’ve been friends a long time.”
“I know.” Her heart thundered. She cherished every day with him and didn’t want to lose their closeness. “So?”
“So now I’ve seen you naked, honey. I can’t just go on pretending you’re only a friend to me.”
Only a friend?
Relief tried to take over, but he wasn’t done.
“Just as I can’t pretend I don’t want you.”
The bottom fell out of her world. Jubilation mixed with mortifying memories, swamping her, tightening her chest, burning the backs of her eyes.
How could he say something like that?
He touched her hair, letting his hand trail down a thick curl. He paused at her bruised cheek, staring so intently that she felt his concern. “I’m not pressuring you, you know. No reason to look so spooked. You can have all the time you need to get used to the idea.”
“Uh…thanks?” She would
never
get used to that idea. Sure, most women had body issues. She’d always wished to be a few pounds lighter, a little more athletic, less…rounded. But after her last lover, well, she’d had her body issues driven home in a big way.
“Thanks?” He kept touching her in small ways, as if doing so gave him pleasure. He put a barely-there kiss to her bruised cheek, then another just below her eye. “What kind of reaction is that?”
“I don’t know.” He was so close, she could see the striations in his honey-colored eyes.
“You’ve taken me by surprise, that’s all.” She knew Evan was a nice guy, so he’d never insult her—not the way she’d been insulted. And with Evan being as male as the next guy—maybe more so, at least in her opinion—a naked woman equaled thoughts of lust.
Except that she cared too much for him to blow their relationship with a quick fling. She wished it was different, because, holy smokes, she’d wanted him a long time. Sometimes she couldn’t sleep for thinking about how it’d be….
But she wasn’t the type of woman who would ever keep him for long—except as a friend. And she wasn’t about to give up that friendship for a night or two of sex.
No matter how mind-blowing it might be.
Misunderstanding her lengthy silence, Evan reassured her. “For tonight at least, you can trust that I’ll keep my hands to myself.”
Bummer.
“I just thought it was important for you to know how I feel.”
Yeah, she got it: he felt momentarily turned on. The rush of the danger, the intimacy of seeing her nude, had affected him, as it would affect almost any guy.
But he wasn’t just any guy, not to her.
“Evan…” How did she clarify things? “You did see me, right?”
“Oh yeah.”
The way he said that… “And?”
His eyes went heavy. “You have a great body.”
Such
a nice guy. “But?” she said, encouraging him to honesty.
“There’s a but?”
Her face pinched. “You know there is.”
For the longest time, he studied her. Finally he seemed to come to some decision. He sat back, putting distance between them and breaking her heart just a little.
“
But,”
he said, stressing the word, “your body would look even better—”
Here it comes. She braced herself to hear him say:
If you lost weight. If you did some cardio. If your figure wasn’t so overblown-
“—under mine.”
That bombshell turned her spine into a noodle, and she slumped against him. “What?”
“Or over mine.” He warmed to the subject. “Your naked body could only look better if it was against my naked body.” He reached for her. “In fact, naked or not, I want your body closer.”
He pulled her right up and into his lap.
Surprised, she let him arrange her comfortably, almost as if she was a tiny person instead of a full-figured, grown woman. “Evan?”
“You have a totally kicking body. Smoking hot. No ‘but’ to it.” He kissed her hard and fast, sort of annoyed but also determined. “How could you not know that?”
“I’m…” No way would she insult herself, so what could she say? “I’m not slim.”
“No, thank God.”
Was he being obtuse on purpose? “You know women are expected—”
“To be sexy,” he interrupted. “And you are.” He tunneled a hand into her hair, careful not to hurt her stitches. He lifted her face to his. “In your clothes, you’re hot enough to drive me nuts. But without clothes… Damn, Cinder, that’s not something I’m ever going to forget.”
She blinked at him. “You mean—”
“I want to see you again. At my leisure. While I have permission to touch as well as look.”
He sounded so sincere. “Touch as well as…?”
“Look. Oh, and taste.” He used his pinkie to brush back one curl. “I really want to taste you, too.”
This time the heat flooding her body wasn’t embarrassment. And if he truly enjoyed her figure, then that changed everything, didn’t it?
He shook his head at her disconcerted look. “News flash, Cinder. I want you. I’ve wanted you since the first day we met.”
She drew back to better see him. “No way.”
“What am I, blind? Of course I did. Like I said, you’re hot. But you’re also adorably funny and smart and caring.”
“You never said anything!”
“You didn’t seem receptive, so I’ve tried to be noble.”
The idea of so much wasted time choked her. “
Noble?”
He nodded with grave sincerity. “Lots of sleepless nights on my end. But like I said, seeing you in the raw—now all bets are off. If you hadn’t been through hell today, I’d be giving it my best shot to get you into bed. Or laid out on this couch.”
That sounded pretty awesome to her.
“But you need some time.”
Was he nuts? “No I don’t,” she rushed to assure him.
The corner of his mouth kicked up. “No?”
She shook her head hard and fast. “I’m fine.” All hot and bothered, but otherwise, no problem. “I swear.”
“You’re bruised. You have stitches.” He lifted her arm to kiss the marks there, too.
“You’ve had an upset.”
Her mouth opened twice with nothing coming out. What could she say? Screw the stitches and the bruises, she wanted him? Maybe. “I don’t care about any of that.”
“You’re not sore?”
Heck no. The second he’d gotten her into his lap, every ache and pain had ceased to exist.
“No.” She put a hand to his solid chest. “Not anymore.”
He grinned outright. “So you want me, too?”
“Of course.”
His grin slipped. Suspicion darkened his eyes. “Why do you say it like that?”
“Pfft.”
She caressed his chest, over that rock-solid shoulder. It hadn’t escaped her notice that he wore only jeans and a white T-shirt. She loved how the cotton shirt hugged his chest and shoulders, the way it fit across his back. “Not only are you smart and funny and so incredibly nice, the nicest guy I’ve ever known, but
look
at you.” She barely repressed a sigh. “What woman wouldn’t want you?”
A frown crept over his brow. “I could say the same about men wanting you.” It wasn’t her shoulder he reached for.
His big, hot hand curved over her breast.
She went still on the outside, all aflutter on the inside. “
Evan.”
“I’m asking again, honey.” His thumb brushed over her nipple. “How come you don’t realize how beautiful you are?”
He actually expected her to talk while he did that? Not easy. “Because… I’m not dumb.” Throwing his words back at him, she added, “Or blind.”
“Meaning?”
She swallowed back a groan. “I know I’m not the standard size.”
“Hate to break it to you, honey, but women don’t have a standard size.” His thumb continued to play with her. “And men appreciate the variety.”
That was exactly how she’d always felt! “Maybe. But they appreciate skinnier women more.”
“Who says?” He reached down and slipped his hand up under her shirt, so that now he touched bare skin.
Oh wow. Her eyes closed as his fingers stroked over her. His palm was so hot, a little rough.
“Cinder?”
“I don’t know. Society?”
“But I’m the only one here.” He stroked down to her waist, back and over her hip. “And I’m not keen on all of society ever seeing you in the buff.”
“I didn’t mean that.”
“Thank God.” He hugged her close, tucking her head under his chin. “So someone has made you feel less than perfect? Tell me who.”
“No one is perfect.”
“You are. So tell me who said otherwise.”
What did it matter now? “Just an ex.” She breathed in his scent and wanted to eat him alive. “It was shortly before I met you.” And she hadn’t dated since.
Evan was silent a moment. “You’re still hung up on him?”
“No!” Shuddering with revulsion, she said, “Not even close.”
He tangled his fingers in her hair again to gently massage her scalp. “Then what does it matter what he thought?”
She couldn’t believe him. “You really want to talk about this
now?
” A wiggle against his erection made her meaning clear.
“Yeah, I do. I’ve been thinking about getting you in bed so long that, once we hit the sheets, I don’t want you to be shy.” He held her tighter. “So sit still, stop tormenting me and tell me what the bozo said that was enough to derail all the interest I’ve shown.”
“I didn’t know you were showing that kind of interest.”
“My point, exactly.” He palmed her rear. “Now, give over, so we can get to the bed part of this disclosure.”
Far as encouragement went, that was a doozy. “Okay, fine. He was…cruel.” She did not want to give details. “That’s all.”
“That’s all?” He tipped her back. “Tell me.”
Reliving that awful day wasn’t easy, but she supposed Evan deserved an explanation—albeit a shortened version. “We’d dated for a few months, mostly hanging out at my place or his.”
He scowled. “Sort of like what you and I do?”
“I’m low-key, I guess. I enjoying hanging out at home.”
Disgruntled, he said, “Me too.” And then, “But I hope that’s where the resemblance ends.”
“Believe me, it is.” She put her head on his shoulder so she wouldn’t have to look at him.
“I thought things were going along great. Then one night I went out to dinner with a lot of people from the hospital. We ran into him all cozy and intimate in a bar with another woman.”
Evan grunted. “Jerk.”
“It was so embarrassing. He’d been drinking, so maybe that’s part of why he was so nasty about things. But he broke it off by telling his current date that I was just…” Her words trailed off.
Evan kissed her, not so hard and definitely not as fast as before. She curled her fingers into his shirt and held on.
When he lifted his mouth, he breathed deep. “What did he say?”
“He said a lot, and I won’t repeat it word for word.” She would never voice the awful litany of insults. “But the gist of it was that a woman my size was desperate and made it easy on him…you know, to get laid. He said he assumed I knew he wouldn’t be interested in a cow like me, not for anything…public.” She tucked herself in closer to Evan. “Because he didn’t want to be seen with me.”