Read Love and Dreams: The Coltrane Saga, Book 6 Online
Authors: Patricia Hagan
“Jade! Oh, Jade!”
Rushing across the gold-and-turquoise rug, Jade warmly met Dani’s outstretched arms. After a moment, she pulled away and sat down to glance in admiration at the ornate upholstered bed with its elaborate needlework trimmings on headboard and tester, then exulted, “You look like a princess, so dainty and pretty in this gorgeous bed and that beautiful gown you’re wearing.”
Dani beamed. “The bed is something Drake and I found when we were in England right after we married. We had it in storage the last time you were here. I think it’s my favorite piece.” She smiled broadly. “I understand you’re a real princess now—a very special wedding gift from the Czar himself. I want to hear all about it—everything.” She waved a hand airily. “Kitty gave me her version, but I’ll bet yours is more exciting…especially the part about your sneaking away at the reception.”
Jade laughed. “That, I think, made a bigger impression on everyone than the wedding itself.”
Briefly, she described the mischief, and Dani laughed, delighted to hear such a tale. But as Jade spoke, she was thinking how pale Dani looked, an almost ghostlike deity propped against the soft pink pillows. She seemed so thin, her cheeks hollow, sunken, and her eyes had lost their familiar happy sparkle. It was obvious she’d lost weight, yet her rounded tummy beneath the sheets gave testimony to her delicate condition.
Suddenly Dani interrupted accusingly, “You’re thinking how terrible I look.”
Jade gasped, surprised and embarrassed.
“You have the same look on your face everyone gets when they come in here. You look at me and think how sick I look…how I won’t be able to have this baby.
“But I will!” She glared at Jade, her eyes hot with determination. “I’m going to carry this baby the full time, and it’s going to live. I know it, because I feel it in my heart.”
Jade was suddenly very uncomfortable and did not know how to react to Dani’s outburst. Somewhat hesitantly, she said, “Well, I’m sure both of you will be fine, and—”
“Listen to me!” Dani turned on her side, raised up on one elbow to stare at Jade with an expression of desperation in her need to make herself understood. “I’ve lain here for almost three months. I took to this bed as soon as I thought there was the slightest possibility I might be pregnant, and I’ve been here ever since—because I want this baby more than I’ve ever wanted anything in my life!” She bit out the declaration.
Jade could only stare at her in wonder, then decided it best to let her say whatever was on her mind. If she could help by lending a sympathetic ear, she was more than willing.
Dani leaned back once more, her hair fanning out on the pillow. She gazed up at the ceiling for long moments, her breath harsh and ragged, then becoming even; and when it did, she began to speak again, but it was more to herself than to Jade. “Being alone as much as I have, I’ve come to really know myself, as though up till now I wasn’t a real person, a real being. It’s as though that ceiling up there, that I stare at for so long I almost become hypnotized, is actually a mirror to my soul. I’ve seen things that were there all my life probably, but I had to have this time to find them, to uncover the real me. If nothing else comes from this time, then I’ve this much to be thankful for. I know who I am…but most important, I know why I am.”
She gave a short, bitter laugh, reached to pat Jade’s hand. “You think I’m crazy, don’t you? You think I’m losing my mind. It’s not so bad, really. Drake spends as much time as he can with me, but there’s the rest of the house to be built, and he keeps an eye on the shop, the people who’re running it when Kitty isn’t there, and more and more lately she isn’t, because of my father, but that’s all right. I understand. I want her to be with him.”
Jade sensed Dani had a reason for this speech. She did not have long to wait to get her explanation.
Dani suddenly reached out to clutch Jade’s arm, nails digging into flesh almost painfully. “I want you to promise me something, Jade. I want you to promise me that if I die, you will take my baby and raise it as your own.”
Jade’s eyes widened. Her lips parted, but she could make no sound. Never could she have guessed what was behind Dani’s bizarre behavior. Finally, she stammered, “I—I don’t know what to say, Dani. You know Colt and I would both be willing to do that, but it isn’t going to be necessary. Besides,” she pointed out, unsure of Dani’s motivation, “Drakar is the father, and surely he’d object.”
A bittersweet smile came to Dani’s lips. “Drake knows how I feel, and he loves me enough to abide by my wishes, even if it means giving up his child.”
Jade shook her head, feeling dizzy with bafflement. “But why? Why on Earth would you want him to give up his baby? Why wouldn’t you trust him to raise it? He can afford the best of everything.”
“Drake is a handsome, virile man, and even though he doesn’t think so now, he’d marry again. My child would represent me in his wife’s eyes. She’d take out any jealousy for me and the love Drake and I shared on that child.
“Oh, Jade, don’t you see?” She grasped her arm once again, looking quite desperate. “I know only too well how jealousy and resentment can be channeled to a child. My aunt had an affair with my father, but he married my mother, and my aunt never got over that. Her hatred increased when he killed the other man in her life in a gunfight. Consciously or subconsciously, she took it all out on me, and I don’t want my child to be touched by anything similar. Drake loves me, and he’ll never be able to love a woman in quite the same way, and just as my mother realized that fact with Travis’s love for Kitty, so will any second wife of Drake’s.”
She drew in a harsh breath, let it out slowly. “Now do you understand my request? And why Drake will abide by it?”
“I understand now, I honestly do,” Jade said softly. “And Colt and I would be honored to raise your baby and love it as our own, but nothing is going to happen to you, Dani.” Kissing her cheek, she stepped back and hoped her smile looked confident.
Dani seemed at peace once the promise was made, and Jade seized the moment to end what had become a stressful visit. They embraced once more, and Jade promised to visit as often as possible before she left France; then she hurried from the room.
Once outside, she leaned against the wall momentarily to regain her composure before returning to Drakar and Colt. If what she was feeling inside showed on her face, they’d want to know what was wrong, and right now she didn’t want to talk about it. She needed time to sort things out in her own mind. Dani was, after all, probably worrying needlessly.
Or was she?
Cold fingers of apprehension began to slowly wrap around Jade’s spine, and she felt a shadow of fear descending…as though something terrible was about to happen—not just to Dani, but to her…and Colt.
Chapter Five
When Jade returned to the parlor, she could feel the tension in the air.
Drakar sat with shoulders hunched, staring morosely at the glass of brandy he held with tightly laced fingers. Colt was standing at the window, hands held behind his back as he looked out at nothing in particular. He turned when Jade entered, and she did not have to ask whether Drakar had told him of Dani’s request. “You agreed.” He spoke with finality, as though no discussion were needed.
“Of course, but we’re going to pray it never will be necessary.”
Drakar downed the rest of his drink in one gulp, stood up, went to pour another as he told them, “I’ve talked to her till I’m blue in the face, but she’s got this fear she’s going to die and she doesn’t have anything to do except worry about it while she’s lying there hour after hour, day after day. I try to spend as much time as I can with her, but…” His voice trailed off helplessly.
Colt moved toward the door. “I’d better go in now.”
When they were alone, Jade sat and listened quietly as Drakar welcomed the opportunity to confide his troubles to a friend. She could not think of anything to say or do that would ease his pain; knew that all he needed for the moment was the only thing she could give him—a sympathetic and understanding ear.
Colt spent an hour or more with Dani, then returned to tell them that she hadn’t mentioned her conversation with Jade. “In fact, she was cheerful.” He smiled at Jade. “I guess your promising to do what she asked eased some of the tension. Maybe things will be better now.”
On the ride back to Paris, Colt was quiet, deep in private thoughts. At first, Jade attempted to lighten his mood by pointing out the beautiful French vista, away from the congestion and hustle and bustle of Paris proper. Late-blooming summer flowers dotted the countryside, splashing it with color and spicing the air with sweet fragrance. It was a gorgeous day. A gentle wind blew puffy fingers of snowy-white clouds across the tinted cobalt sky. The sun was a teasing peach-and-golden orb, sending warmth in peekaboo waves as the open carriage passed beneath the leafy branches overhanging the curving road.
Finally, with a sigh of resolution, Jade settled back to enjoy the scenic ride without further intruding upon Colt’s meditation. She had an idea why he was so deeply within himself. No doubt he was worrying that now was not the time to leave his family. This plunged her into a troubled muse of her own, for how would she react if he suggested they postpone their departure? She was excited over the prospects of a new life, away from memories that held little joy. If Colt did make such a suggestion, could she do the noble thing and agree…or be honest and tell him she thought they should get on with their own lives? Kitty was strong. Dani had Drakar. And now they had each other…and their future together.
Dani’s request continued to prey on her mind, and she could understand why the wretched soul felt that way. She recalled how, that very afternoon, the maid who’d served her tea, while Colt was in with Dani, had looked at Drakar with open adoration on her young and pretty face. He was legend with women. Ever since she’d known him, which was a long time, women flocked about him, threw themselves at his feet. It was probably no different now, even though he was married, and would get worse were he a widower. He would be a prime target for conniving females after a rich husband. They’d pretend to love the baby and make all sorts of promises just to snare him, only to later turn into the evil, jealous stepmother Dani feared. True, it was possible he might find one good heart who would love the child as her own, but the risk was too great in Dani’s eyes.
Jade shook herself in an attempt to fling away such thoughts. Nothing was going to happen to Dani, but she wondered at that strange coldness that was now enveloping her once again; why did she have this terrifying premonition that something bad was going to happen to somebody?
Just as they reached the gates of the Coltrane mansion, Colt suddenly turned to Jade and in an imploring voice, eyes shaded with worry, said, “Let’s not mention anything about what Dani asked. We don’t want to upset them, especially Pa.”
“Of course,” Jade was quick to agree.
She reached out to touch his hand, and he wrapped his arms about her, kissed her forehead. “I love you so much, my princess.”
“And I love you,” she responded huskily, blinking back tears and not knowing why she felt like crying.
They found Travis sitting on the terrace that overlooked Kitty’s prize rose garden at the rear of the mansion. He looked, Jade decided at once, hearty and fit, except for slight shadows beneath his eyes. He was not wearing the robe and slippers she’d expected but was attractively dressed in casual gray trousers and a shirt of soft blue cotton. He stood up, embraced Jade, kissed both her cheeks, and said, “You’re even more beautiful than at the wedding,” then shook hands with Colt, gave him a hearty slap on his back, and laughed. “And you’re even uglier!”
Jade couldn’t help exclaiming, “You look wonderful!”
“Of course,” he assured her, gesturing for them to join him at the wrought-iron table, where he’d been enjoying afternoon wine and cheese. “Just because a few Reb balls are moving around in my chest doesn’t mean I’m done for. They couldn’t kill me thirty years ago, and I’ll be damned if I’ll give up now without another fight.”
They enjoyed a glass of wine as they told him of their honeymoon cruise. He was, Jade noted, especially interested in hearing of their travels in Greece, but she remembered he’d been there with Colt, when Colt went after Briana, Gavin Mason, and the Coltrane fortune.
Eventually, the conversation turned to Dani, and they glossed over the situation as much as possible. Travis listened, raised an eyebrow, then echoed aloud the thoughts of all, “Let’s pray everything turns out all right.”
Kitty waved from where she was pruning late summer blossoms, and Colt left them to join her. Travis watched him leave, then bluntly asked Jade, “Well, did you promise to raise the baby if Dani doesn’t make it?”
She gasped and turned to stare at him in amazement. “How did you know she asked me about that?”
He reached to touch her cheek with gentle fingertips and smiled sadly. “We’ve gotten to know each other, my little girl and me, and she talks to her old pa now and tells him what makes her heart cry.”
“Travis,” Jade dared to point out, “I think you’ve been doing a lot of needless worrying.”
He gave her a sharp look, unused to anyone besides his wife daring to criticize—or disagree.
Jade, undaunted and seldom intimidated, plunged on. “It seems to me that’s all this family is doing lately—worrying about everybody else. Kitty worries about you and Dani. Dani worries about her baby. Drakar worries about Dani. You worry about them all…and Colt worries about everybody including you.”