Loud: The Complete Series (A Bad Boy Alpha Male Romance) (39 page)

I worried he was
clearing the path and he needed to know there were other big obstacles. I had
started dating Trent three months back and had never mentioned it before.

I rolled out of
bed and grabbed my phone.

"Hi, sweetie.
I was wondering when I was going to hear from you," Trent said.

"Hear from
me? You were supposed to be here for the funeral," I said.

"Whoa, so
we're going to jump right into that, huh? Quinn, honey, don't be mad…"

"Trent, you
missed my sister's funeral. I needed you here," I told him.

"Not really
time to meet the parents and do that whole show. I thought I was doing you a
favor," Trent said.

I could hear him
put a hand over the phone and whisper to someone. "I thought you said you
didn't care about them. You were going to come to support me." I felt too
tired to have the conversation, but it was too late.

Trent was
exhausting. The constant upbeat pace of his personality was what first
attracted me to him. He was 5' 9", lanky with dyed white hair cut short.
He stood out and was always the center of attention. So when he noticed me, I
was swept into his life. At first, I was happy to be along for the ride. Trent
was funny, knew everybody on campus, and was the king of the perfectly timed
compliment. He was just the person to pull me from my shell at college. But
lately, I was realizing how much he drained my energy.

Trent was not a
cuddle on the couch and play video games kind of guy.

"I do support
you, baby. And I thought I was doing you a favor by staying here. You should
have seen me, killing rumors about your sister at this big campus party,"
Trent said.

"You went to
a party?"

"Oh, you know
me, it was just some get-together until I got a hold of this sweet set of speakers,"
Trent laughed then cut himself short. "So, tell me about the
ceremony."

"There was a
visitation here at the house and then the interment at the cemetery. It was
awful. My parents were awful. All the people remembering the saintly side of
Sienna were awful. Her whole high school class showed up."

"Ugh. I can
imagine. Every time I go home, I feel like I need body armor to deflect all the
high school reunion crap. People are always telling me how great I look now. As
if I was a total slug then or something," Trent said.

"It was just
really hard that no one wanted to remember the real Sienna. My sister was more
than some peppy go-getter, you know? She had ups and downs just like everyone.
It was like watching a real 3D person turn into a 2D photograph right in front
of me," I tried to explain.

"Oh, speaking
of photos, you need to go online and check out the pics of me at the art show.
There's this one where I swear I look just like the guy from that movie you
like. You know, the cool one with the suit and sunglasses?"

"Trent! I'm
talking about my sister's funeral."

"I know, I
know, sweetie. I get it. I'm just trying to lighten the mood. When are you
coming back to campus?" he asked.

"I don't
know. My parents want me to stay another day or two, but-"

Trent interrupted,
"Sounds good. I mean, you need family time and all that. Come over right
when you get here, okay? Miss you!"

I listened to the
dial tone and resisted the urge to throw my phone against the wall. Trent was
right, though. I needed to lighten my mood, and staying with my parents one
more day was not going to help.

I packed my bags
before breakfast. My father was the only one downstairs; my mother's bedroom
door was shut tight again.

"Would it be
okay if I headed back to campus soon?" I asked my father.

"That's a
good idea. You probably have a lot of catching up to do," he said. He was
packing his briefcase to head back to work. He missed my head and kissed the
air as he walked to the garage door.

#

I
got to my dorm room just before lunch. Darla had already left for class and I
was glad for a moment alone. As soon as I had driven onto campus, I was flooded
with memories of Sienna. I had to take a detour just to avoid seeing her
dormitory.

I threw my
overnight bag on the bed and opened it. Instead of carefully putting everything
away, I decided to just dump it into my laundry basket. I had only been on
campus twenty minutes, but I was already itching to get back in the car.

There were
messages written all over the white board on our door. Notes were taped along
the doorframe. Inside, Darla had carefully arranged a wild display of cheap
flowers purchased at the bookstore. It looked like half of campus had decided
to leave me condolences. I hated to think what Sienna's door looked like and
vowed not to go there.

Instead, I started
to think about leaving campus all together. Sienna was the only one that had
kept me on track. Even my college advisor had started suggesting I look at
other majors. Without my sister driving me, there was no way I was going to earn
my degree in nursing. I did not have the heart for it.

Sienna
was going to be the heart surgeon
, I thought.
Had I somehow imagined I would be a nurse in
the same hospital? What had I been thinking?

It had all been
decided for me. I remembered the conversations over my college applications. I
had said very little. I loved the sound of UCLA and at the time, it had not
mattered what got me here. Now, all I could think about was getting out.

The sickly sweet
smell of the carnations and daisies made me nauseated. The few cards that I
could see all talked about Sienna like she was a perfect angel.
Am I so wrong for wanting to remember my
sister the way she actually was?

I still had time
to make it to class, but the whole rest of the day stretched out before me like
a minefield of memories. I would look for Sienna everywhere. She had helped
pick out the quilt on my bed. She had given me my desk organizer. Sienna always
waved to me before gross anatomy. The memories froze my blood faster than
seeing a real ghost and drove me from my room.

"Quinn! I
didn't expect to see you back so soon."

I stopped short of
running my lab partner over. Her smile wobbled at the wild look in my eyes, but
she caught me in a hug anyway.

"Yeah, I
think I came back too fast. I mean, I'm just here to get some more of my
stuff," I said.

She brushed back
her curly hair and blinked wet eyes at me. "I can't even imagine how hard
this is for you. Darla thought about taking down all the notes, but she finally
decided it was a good memorial for everyone."

"No, she's
right. It’s wonderful." I made sure to look anywhere but the door covered
in condolences. "How's class?"

"I've got all
the notes for you and I asked a few of the students that film his lectures to
send you links. I think you can catch up no problem."

I put a hand
against the wall and wondered if I was going to retch. "Sounds good."

"No, no it
doesn't. Oh, Quinn, I'm so sorry," she said. "You know there is a
school policy that lets students take a semester off. Family tragedy is a completely
understandable reason for needing the time."

"No, it’s
fine. I'll be back soon. Thanks so much for keeping me up to date," I
said. The idea of all the make-up work was overwhelming, but I managed a smile
for my lab partner. "Are you doing okay on your own or did they assign you
a new partner?"

"A new
partner. Remember the guy with the glasses that I kind of had a crush on? So
really, it’s no problem," she smiled.

I was glad for the
change of topic. "He's a friend of Trent's. We'll have to try a double
date some time."

Her smile slipped
as she checked her watch. "I gotta run but you take care, Quinn. See you
again soon!"

I turned and ran
down the stairwell. Now that she had mentioned taking a semester off, the idea
was taking root. I needed time to figure out what I really wanted to do and if
UCLA was really the place for me. So, naturally, before I decided to leave
college, the person I needed to talk to was my college boyfriend. I headed out
the door and straight for Trent's dorm.

He should have
been in his economics class. There was a sunny common room two doors down from
his dorm room and I planned to wait there until he got back. It was always easy
to hear when Trent was coming.

Only when I passed
his door, I heard something that made my heart stop. A low moan tipped up to a
tight, ragged sigh before settling back into heavy breathing.

His
roommate?
I wondered. I could not force myself to keep walking
and stood rooted to the floor outside his door.

An unmistakable
rhythm was building behind Trent's door and a duet of soft groans was getting
louder. I prayed it was his roommate. Trent's roommate had a desk cluttered
with photographs of his high school sweetheart. Maybe she was visiting.

"Ooo, Big T
likes that, baby."

Trent's voice was
heavy, but I heard it clearly. Before I could stop myself, I turned the handle
and threw open the door.

My boyfriend was
bent over, one knee on his twin bed, the other foot planted on the floor.
Standing square behind him with his pants around his ankles was a short guy
with black curly hair.
 

#

Trent's
lover grabbed his
pants but still tripped as he pushed away from my boyfriend. Trent dove onto
the bed and rolled into the covers, but not before I saw he was completely
naked.

"You're
gay?" I asked, though it came out as more of a shout.

"Don't
overreact, Quinn," Trent said. He stood up and wrapped the bedspread
around his waist. "I think we can all be adults about this. John knows all
about you."

"I know. I
introduced you two!" I could not control the volume of my voice.

Trent shushed me
as he dodged around and shut the door behind me. "Oh, yeah. I forgot about
that."

"We're in the
same nursing program," I said. "I introduced you at the mixer last
month. Wait, how long has this been going on?"

John buckled his
pants and pulled on his shirt. Then, he crossed his arms and looked at Trent.
"I thought she knew about us."

"And that's
supposed to make it okay?" I asked.

John shrugged.
"Trent said you were cool with it. I thought you two had, like, an open
relationship or something."

"Is that what
you told him?" I asked Trent.

"Look, Quinn,
I get it. I should have told you, but this is all kind of new for me,"
Trent tried to explain.

"What exactly
is new for you?" I asked. "Being gay, cheating on your significant
other, or getting caught?"

John smothered a
laugh. "I like her. So, I'm going to get out of here."

"Wait,
no," Trent said. He blocked the door. "Quinn, you're right. This is
not how you should have found out. I meant to tell you. I meant to tell her,
John. I really did hope everything I said would be true."

"What did he
say?" I asked John.

"He said you
were the best girlfriend he's ever had. Like a best friend, a perfect date, and
a good kisser all wrapped up in one person," John said.

"Just minus a
penis," I said.

John gave me a
sympathetic smile. "Trent's not gay, honey. He's bi-sexual. What he wants
is both of us. I'm not big on sharing, but you're a dear and I think we'd get
along."

I turned to Trent
and strangled my hands together to stop them from shaking. "So, what
John's telling me is that you want to date me, but have sex with him?" I
asked.

"Both of
you," Trent said, reaching for my hand. "I like having sex with you,
too."

I pulled away.
"You cheated on me!"

"We never
really talked about exclusivity, Quinn. And this is really something totally
different. I didn't have sex with another woman. You're the only gal for
me."

"We haven't
dated anyone else for months," I said. "There wasn't anything to talk
about. We were a couple. That means 'two,' Trent. Not two people plus a little
fun on the side. It doesn't matter who you did it with. Cheating is
cheating."

"Come on,
Quinn, so I screwed up. That doesn't mean we have to break up," Trent
said.

"It does to
me," I said. I rubbed my forehead. "I guess it’s good you didn't come
to the funeral. Owen's the only one that knows about you."

"Owen?"
Trent asked. "You're oh-so-hot best friend flirt fest? The one that was
'dating' your sister but actually all over you? You were with him this
weekend?"

"With him? He
was at Sienna's funeral! Like you were supposed to be. Of course, I talked to
him. I needed someone to lean on," I said.

Trent crossed his
arms. "Oh, so you leaned on him? Now's who’s the cheater?"