Lost Love Found (25 page)

“Eventually?” Valentina echoed.

“The Frenchwoman was fortunate to find love with her Tatar lord, my child. Many women are forced into harems. They hate their daily existence and the man who owns them. Listen to me, Valentina. You must understand where you are going. In the East, women are for pleasure and for breeding
only
. No one is interested in their intelligence or whether they can read or speak another language or even work in the family business. Women are … things. They are for a man’s amusement. Creatures for bearing healthy sons. Daughters do not count.

“I thank God that your hair is dark, but even so, you are in danger, Valentina. You are a fair-skinned Christian Englishwoman. The rules of fairness that apply in Islam will not apply to you, a foreigner. You will be fair game, I warn you. Your aunt Skye’s dark hair did not prevent her from twice being caught in that beautiful and violent world of sensuality that Islam is. Do not go, Valentina! I beg you!” Aidan pleaded with her daughter.

“Tell me of the sultan,” Valentina said, not meeting her mother’s soft gray eyes.

Aidan sighed again. “His hair was red-gold. His eyes were dark. He was a sensualist through and through. He was interested in clocks and the acquisition of gold and women for himself. In his time, the price of beautiful women was driven up in the slave markets of Istanbul, for Murad wanted them all for himself. His sexual appetite was prodigious, and he was cruel beyond all men. Ask me no more, Valentina, for I cannot bear to remember!”

Valentina could not bear to think of what her gentle mother had suffered. “Tell me of Murad’s favorite wife and his mother,” she requested, hoping to steer the conversation into less turbulent waters.

“Nur-U-Banu is dead now. I have learned the news of Istanbul over the years. Nur-U-Banu was the sultan’s mother, and her only interest was power. She ruled through her son, who was vulnerable to her whims. Murad was happy with his favorite, Safiye. They had a son, the sultan who now rules. Mehmed is his name. Nur-U-Banu believed that Safiye had gained too much influence with Murad and so she worried her son about his favorite’s inability to produce more children. She tempted him with the most exquisite beauties and eventually Murad succumbed to the beautiful temptations that she dangled before him. He strayed from Safiye’s side, and her only consolation was that one day her son would rule and she would possess Nur-U-Banu’s power. Now she does.”

“So,” said Valentina, “in the end, everything worked out all right despite Nur-U-Banu’s meddling.”

Aidan laughed harshly. “When Mehmed became sultan, he practiced an old Ottoman custom. He had all nineteen of his brothers—little boys actually, ranging in age from eleven to infancy—strangled. Those of his father’s women who were with child suffered the fate meant for me. They were sewn into silken sacks and drowned. This is the place you are going to, Valentina. It is a beautiful yet terrifying world. You will be in danger there. You
are
your father’s daughter. Why can you not simply believe me?”

“I do, Mama. And yet … I cannot. Mag’s words torture me night and day. I must go.”

Tom Ashburne had gone home to Swan Court to set his affairs in order. Lord Burke, however, remained at Pearroc Royal in an attempt to comfort Valentina, for the knowledge she possessed had made her restless and unhappy. She had written to the queen explaining her dilemma and begging Her Majesty’s permission to leave her service so that she might follow her fate to Turkey. The queen had reluctantly allowed Lady Barrows a temporary leave on the condition that Valentina stop in London before departing for the East.

There was nothing for Valentina to do but wait at Pearroc Royal, for the provisioning of the ships was not her affair. All that was required of her was that she provide her Aunt Skye with the monies required to outfit her expedition.

They would be ready to leave in early January. Skye had arranged through the Kiras and her own factors in Istanbul for Valentina’s ships to pay a visit to the khanate of the Crimea, pretending to be on a trading mission. Once Valentina was there, it would be up to the Great Khan to see her or not, as he chose. Aidan did not even know whether the Great Khan was Javid Khan’s father, still living, or some other relative. They would not find out who possessed the throne until they reached the Crimea. They would stop in Istanbul first so that Valentina could make arrangements to see the Valideh Safiye Kadin on her return from the Crimea. The protocol involved would take that much time.

The waiting was hard on Valentina. She could not speak to her mother without upsetting her greatly, and Conn’s concerns were for Aidan, who was positive that Valentina was walking into terrible danger. Val’s siblings were all gone but for Jamie, and the little boy could not possibly comprehend his sister’s distress. That left only Padraic. She was grateful that he had stayed at Pearroc Royal to be with her.

“What of Clearfields?” She worried for him. They were talking in the upstairs hallway.

“I’ve a good bailiff, and Adam has promised to oversee any problems. My horses will be brought to Mother at Queen’s Malvern with their grooms, so only the farms will need supervision.”

“What of the house?” she asked.

“I’ve lived alone in it these last years and have only needed two servants to oversee the place. They will see to things while I am gone. I have already spoken with the workmen who will be refurbishing the house. Later, it will be up to you to see to the decor, for I want you to be happy in your home,” he finished calmly.

“I have never said I would marry you, Padraic. What of Tom Ashburne?” Valentina found herself slightly giddy.

“Tom will have to find his own true love, Val, for I have found mine” was Padraic’s calm reply. He was behaving as if everything were settled between them!

“But I have not said yes, you ass!” she shouted.

“You will,” he answered, grinning.

“I won’t!” she snapped, infuriated by his proprietary attitude.

He chuckled with infuriating confidence. “Aye, hinny love, you will. But I’ll give you the time to come to your own conclusion.”

“You are the most impossible man!” she fumed. “You have always been such a gentle man, with a sense of deference. What has happened to you, Padraic Burke?”

“Gentle deference, Valentina, has not won you. Perhaps it is time I became more like my long-departed father, who took what he wanted without a care for the consequences.” With that, he swept her into his embrace and, carrying her a few quick paces, kicked open the door to his bedchamber. He carried her inside and booted the door closed behind him.

“Padraic!” she shrieked, shocked by his behavior.

“Padraic what?” he demanded, dumping her on the bed and flinging himself on top of her.

His body was hard against hers, and she felt a thrill of hot excitement run through her. “Padraic,” she whispered, her voice trembling, “what are you doing?”

“What I should have done months ago, Val! I am going to make love to you,” he said smoothly.

“No!” Her amethyst eyes were wide with shock.

“Yes!” he said through gritted teeth, and then his mouth was on hers, bruising it with a fierce kiss. He raised himself slightly off her and, hooking his hand into her bodice, tore it to the waist, baring her lovely breasts to his fiery gaze. His smoldering glance almost scorched her flesh.

She attempted to cover her bosom, but he imprisoned her wrist in a tight grasp. Valentina’s heart was hammering. She was not afraid of him, for she knew that Padraic Burke would never hurt her, yet there was something wild in his behavior, something she had never guessed existed within him. This passionate man was not the Padraic Burke she knew, and she wondered if she might not be a little afraid of him. She could not, however, seem to find her voice.

He rolled onto his side, still holding her one hand. His other hand reverently caressed her breast, the long fingers following the swell of her warm flesh, cupping her lovely breast in his big hand. His thumb began a slow and beguiling encircling of her nipple. Fascinated, she watched him. For the life of her, she could not move. His touch mesmerized her, and she was aware that a new and most decidedly delicious sensation was permeating her entire being.

He lowered his dark head to take the bud of her nipple into his mouth, to tease it with his warm, satiny tongue. It was wonderful. Into her benumbed brain came the thought that her husband had never touched her like this. If he had, surely she would have enjoyed his attentions more. With that thought a second followed. Padraic was not her husband, and therefore it must be wrong for them to be together like this. “Padraic,” she said softly, “you must not do these things to me.”

He lifted his gaze to hers. His aquamarine-blue eyes had a fevered look, almost a drugged look. “Why?” he demanded.

“Because … because …” She could not think of a good reason, and she gasped as his teeth gently scored her other nipple. “Because it is not proper!” she finally said.

He laughed low. “Tell me to cease, Val, and I will,” he promised as his hand slid beneath her skirts and up her leg to caress her soft inner thighs.

She made a helpless little noise, but no words came.

“You cannot, hinny love!” he growled, triumphant. “I know from the discreet bits of information you so innocently disclosed that your husband was a cold man. He possessed you, yet he knew not the treasure he had! You, the most exquisite of creatures, and he knew nothing of how to stoke the sweet fires that burn within you!” Lord Burke leaped from the bed. So swiftly that he astounded her, he pulled her skirts and underthings from her, leaving her naked but for her black silk stockings with their gold ribbon garters.

Valentina was absolutely frozen by what was happening, although one part of her brain kept anxiously urging her to flee. What was it about him that everytime he kissed and caressed her, she could not function normally. She felt like such a fool. It seemed to grow worse with each instance, and now she watched with startled eyes as he roughly stripped off his own garments, exposing his long, hard body to her curious gaze. Valentina had never seen a grown man completely nude, and the sight was a fascinating, but powerful one.

“You are beautiful,” she murmured without meaning to speak.

“So are you, my sweet hinny love,” he purred, lying down again and drawing her into his arms. “I love you, Val, and I will do nothing to hurt you,” Lord Burke reassured her. His hand slipped between her thighs, the fingers seeking, finding, stroking. “He never touched you like this, did he, Val? He never gave you pleasure or teased the sweetness from you!” His mouth closed over hers, and Valentina’s senses whirled. “A woman is meant to be loved with gentleness and fire, Val, as I am now loving you!” he whispered between kisses.

Why wasn’t it like this with Edward, the sane part of her brain demanded, but she already knew the answer. Ned had certainly never put his hands on her as Padraic was now doing. Never had they lain together like this as God had created them.
Why?
What Padraic was doing to her could not be wrong. Nothing that wonderful could be wrong! This had to be what had made her mother, her aunt, and her cousins so happy in their marriages, for what woman could not be happy being loved so passionately.

There was a part of her that felt near to bursting with pleasure, the delicate flesh with which he even now toyed. She gasped with disbelief as rapture, hot and sweet as boiling jam, filled her with a bliss that was totally foreign, but altogether delightful. “Oh, Padraic!” she heard herself sighing.

“Ah, hinny love, you are so ready to be loved,” he told her. His kisses covered her face, his mouth moving to the wildly beating pulse that leaped at the base of her throat. His mouth scorched a path across her swollen, aching breasts down her torso. Beneath him, Valentina’s flesh quivered with desire. As he eased himself on top of her, Valentina made one last effort.

“This cannot be right, Padraic,” and her eyes pleaded with him to take the initiative and cease this marvelous torture.

His hand smoothed her face and he said gently, “You’re no virgin, Val, and I mean you to be my wife. This cannot be wrong.” Tenderly, he spread her legs with a knee and pressed forward.

“This changes nothing between us, Padraic, for I will not be forced to the altar!” she half sobbed, realizing even as she spoke her desperate and newly awakened need for him.

His laughter was gently mocking. “
This
,” he said, thrusting into her, “changes everything, my hinny love!”

Her eyes closed as she experienced the fullness of him, amazed at the sensation he caused in her, for she had not remembered it this way. He grasped her hips and pulled her to him, driving back and forth within her until Valentina was whimpering with pleasure she had never before experienced. Her arms closed about him for the first time, and she clasped him to her, her aching breasts pushing against his furred chest, her nails digging cruelly into the flesh of his back. Her teeth sank into his shoulder, and he grunted. Her heart was hammering wildly, and she began to feel as if her body were separating from her mind.

“Padraic!” she cried out. “I am going to die!” To her amazement, she realized that she didn’t care. If this was all that there was to be of life for her, it mattered not.

“Nay, hinny love,” he groaned, “ ’tis just the loving, and I’ll not let you fall!”

The words were reassuring, but it made no difference. She was whirling, drawn down into a dark vortex of pure passion, and only the hot, full hardness of him was real. Her bones were melting, her flesh was dissolving, and there was nothing left but sweetness. When at last she could draw a breath again, she realized that she was still alive. Padraic lay sprawled across her, panting, his hands tangled in her dark hair, which had come undone during their melee. He rolled off her, but caught her hand tightly in his.

For a long time there was only silence between them. Then Padriac said softly, “Did you mean what you said?”

Valentina sighed, knowing what he referred to, and felt almost guilty. “Aye, I did,” she finally answered.