Lost Heartbeats (Alexander & Maya Book 2) (4 page)

“I missed you so much,” she whispered as I kept grinding into her, her pussy drowning my cock with her juices.

When I finally felt her starting to contract around me more firmly, I groaned and started fucking her deeply, helping her ride the unexpected orgasm she was clearly having from the look on her face.

“Fuck, yes,” I growled and tried to keep up with her convulsing body. I knew I was too close to the edge, and feeling the warmth of her, the tightness of—

Screaming my name, she bit down on my neck to muffle her cries against my skin, and that was what made me lose complete fucking control.

I kept driving in to her, barely noticing her second orgasm riding after the first one. As she shuddered violently in my arms, I felt everything drop away and it was only the two of us in the world, taking whatever we needed from each other.

When the sounds she was making became too much, I softly cursed against her skin and let myself erupt inside of her.

As I kept rocking my hips—at a much slower pace—letting her fluttering muscles milk every drop out of me, I felt her body go hard as a rock, and I knew she had finally realized what I had done.

“Fuck!” I thundered, making her flinch. “Fuck,” I repeated as I pushed my forehead against her shivering shoulder.

“I’m sorry, Maya. I couldn’t pull out. I’m sorry.”

“I…” she started. “You should let me down.”

I’d known I’d forgotten to put on a condom the second I’d driven into her warmth, but not even that could’ve made me pull out of her. I’d thought I would just stop before it got to the point where I couldn’t hold back anymore, but I guess that was stupid of me. Shocked that I wasn’t as angry as I thought I would be, I tucked myself back in my pants and helped Maya clean the mess I’d made that was trickling down her thighs.

When she finally got dressed and I buttoned my shirt back up, I made sure that she was looking into my eyes before I told her she had nothing to worry about.

“I’m clean. And ever since Claire I never went without a condom.”

I saw her flinch at the mention of my ex-wife’s name and cursed myself for even uttering it to Maya.

Good job, asshole. Good fucking job.

“That’s good to hear. I’m clean too if you were worried about that, but that wasn’t what I was worrying about.”

I cleared my throat. “Sweetheart, if I were worried about that, I would pull out the second I felt your heat burning me when you clenched around me.”

Her brows pinched together, her gaze questioning.

“Ah, I guess you didn’t notice that I didn’t have a condom on, then.”

She sighed. “I guess I got swept up. It’s half my fault, I didn’t even think of it for a second.”

Warmth spread through my chest, and I stood straighter. After I gathered her in my arms, I gave her a lingering kiss and didn’t stop until her body melted into mine.

“It’s a really small chance of something else happening, right?” she asked, drawing back. “I’m not that regular so I’m not sure if the timing was right or wrong.”

“Don’t worry, baby. I doubt it will happen with just one time.”

The thing I didn’t tell her was that I wouldn’t mind if she ended up pregnant with my baby inside of her. I’d known I wanted to keep her with me the second I’d found myself on a plane going after her. And I’d been even more sure of it when I’d felt that same buzz go through my body the second I saw her again. Besides, there was no need to scare her when the chance of her getting pregnant was so small.

Looking anywhere but me, she asked, “Now what?”

“Now? Now you take me home so I can take my time with you in a bed. I’m probably getting old for this wall stuff.”

I forced her tense body to turn around and walked us out of the kitchen area.

That earned me a small chuckle. Not exactly what I was going for, but I would take that too.

“Old? You aren’t even thirty-two,” she said, looking back at me over her shoulder.

“I see you remember my age, too. Please, tell me more. What else do you remember about me? Do I star in your dreams every night Ms. Hart?”

“You wish.” She snorted.

Grabbing her handbag from behind the counter, she walked toward the door.

“So…you’re staying?” she asked before I could get her out the door.

“We’ll talk more when we get to your place, okay?”

That was all I was willing to share before I had some time to think on a few things.

As we silently walked toward where I had parked my car that morning, I did my best to quiet the excited voice in my mind that kept chanting…

Alexander is here!

Alexander is here!

Alexander is here!

There was also another voice badgering me about how stupid a person could be to just forget about using a condom just like that. In my defense, I hadn’t slept with more than a few guys, meaning I’d never been with anyone without a condom. Which was why I hadn’t realized he had skipped that important part. Shouldn’t I have felt the difference?

“Maya.”

His voice drifted to me, taking me out of my thoughts.

“Yes,” I glanced at him, trying to keep my voice neutral and not give away that I was freaking out inside.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

“Of course. Why wouldn’t I be?”

He kept watching me—for what, I had no idea, but I didn’t say anything more.

He sighed. “I rented a car at the train station,” he said, gesturing to the car he was standing next to.

I hugged my arms awkwardly. “Oh.”

“Are you gonna get in?”

“Oh, no. Um, I parked my car down the street. I guess you can follow me home in your own car, then?”

In two strides, he was standing right in front of me. His warm hands covered my face as he bent and looked deeply into my eyes.

“Are you still with me, Maya?”

“I’m trying to be,” I answered honestly.

How could a guy I’d known for only a handful of days affect me so much? It was almost like my heart had up and left me as soon as he’d walked through the door.

“Would you like me to find a hotel to stay in for tonight? I can come to you tomorrow if that’s what you need. But don’t ask me to go away because you are freaking out about what happened back there. I’m not leaving. One night is all I’m willing to give.”

“I’m not freaking out, Alexander,” I said, taking a step closer so I could feel his body heat. “I might still be in shock about having you this close to me, but I’m okay. You said you came here because you needed me.” I shrugged. “It’s the least I can do after everything you did for me in New York, right?” He didn’t give me an answer. “Of course you’ll come home with me.”

“Okay.” He closed his eyes and let out a deep breath. “Just so you know…I am in shock, too.”

“About what?”

“Having you this close. Seeing that we are still the same for each other. That what we felt when you were in New York wasn’t just about your grief. It was real in a way so much more than I thought it was.”

“That’s some serious stuff, Mr. Alexander,” I said, smiling, my chest getting lighter with every word out of his mouth.

“Serious it is, Ms. Hart. You aren’t scared, are you? Me being here isn’t bad for you?”

“No. I think I’m happy to see you.”

“You think?” he asked, a smirk playing on his lips. I smiled back, and he shook his head. “I’m glad you lied to me sweetheart.”

“Lied? About what?” I asked confused.

“That you would get over me as soon as you got on that plane. I was counting on you lying. And being here with you right now, touching you… You have no idea how much it is helping me.”

Since it was clear from his tired eyes how much he was hurting, I didn’t want to say something meaningless before I knew the whole story. And even after that, I couldn’t take away his grief. I wished it worked like that, but it didn’t. All I could do was be there for him when he reached out for someone to hold, when the pain became unbearable, just as he’d been there for me when I’d so desperately needed to feel close to someone.

When I got into my car and started driving, I was still having trouble believing that he had actually come after me. Yet, whenever I glanced at the mirror, he was on my tail, following me. To say that I was overwhelmed would be an understatement.

If he is here, does it mean that he is over Claire?

Would it be naive of me to think that he might actually feel something for me?

But the most important question of all…

After all this time, how could it possibly feel so right to have his skin on mine again?

Countless questions swirling unanswered in my mind, I slowly parked my car, turned off the ignition, and waited for him to slip into the spot next to mine.

When he did, he got out of his car, opened his trunk, and retrieved a small piece of luggage before coming to my door.

Seeing my hesitation to get out, he opened my door for me and extended his hand, his palm up.

“Come on, Maya.”

Not getting out of the car, I looked up at him.

“I think you being here is starting to scare me, Alexander.”

Setting his luggage down, he crouched next to my open door and reached for my hand, the heavy weight of our hands resting on my thigh.

“I’m not here to hurt you, baby.”

“I know you think that, but I believe I’m still gonna end up hurt, whether you intend it or not.”

“It doesn’t have to be that way.”

“I don’t think there is a possibility of another way for us, Alexander. Don’t you see that?”

For a few moments, a thick silence hung between us, and I looked straight ahead—seeing a vivid image of a painful separation when the time came for him to leave again.

“Do you remember what you wrote to me in that letter?”

“I do.” I remembered every word.

“You told me that you wished there was a possibility for us where we could’ve been something more. Do you remember that?”

I nodded.

“This is our possibility, Maya. Don’t take this away from us just because you are feeling overwhelmed. I came here because ever since you left, you are all I can think about. You were the only one I wanted to see when I went through possibly the worst day of my life. We’ll take it one step at a time, I promise. Let’s just go in and take it from there, okay?”

“One step at a time?” I repeated his words back to him as he pulled me out of my seat, his hand warm in mine.

“Exactly like that,” he murmured, taking the keys and locking up my car.

Hand in hand we started walking, and just as we neared my house, I heard a dog start barking in a frenzy.

“What the hell is going on?” Alexander asked, looking around to find where the noise was coming from.

“Shit! I completely forgot.”

Before I could open my mouth to explain, Ester opened her door and Max came running out as if the devil himself was on his heels and I was his only chance of escape.

“Hey, buddy,” I grunted, my hand falling from Alexander’s as I was forced to take a step back when the ball of fur hit me and started to lick my face.

Scrunching my face, I laughed. “Okay, I missed you too, you handsome devil. Can I get in a kiss too?” I asked and as if he knew what I was saying, he stopped licking me enough to give me an opening to plant a small kiss on his moist little nose.

He gave me a happy little bark and started to run in circles around me and Alexander, eager for us to get in on his game.

“Sorry,” I murmured sheepishly to Alexander, only to find him staring back at me with a soft expression on his face.

His lips tipped up. “Please, don’t mind me. I see that I already have competition. I’ll have to up my game.”

“Yeah, we are kind of in love,” I said, laughing as Max tried to jump on me again.

Lifting my head, I saw Ester waiting for me silently. I waved and gestured at her to give me a minute.

“I was supposed to head over to Ester’s as soon as I got out of work, but when you came in…it slipped my mind,” I admitted, searching through my bag for my keys. “Would you mind going in yourself? You can take a shower if you need to; you must be tired after so many hours on the road.” I let the keys drop into his waiting palm and met his eyes. “They are a little worried about me so I just want to go in and let them see that I’m okay. It won’t take long.”

“Why are they worried about you? Did something happen?” he asked as he took a step toward me, his hand touching my waist.

“Yeah, no, everything is fine. Yesterday was a little rough for me, that’s all. We can talk when I get back.” I took a step away from him and called Max to my side.

“This is my place.” I pointed to the house. Suddenly it felt awkward to have him in my space. No matter how much I loved it, it wouldn’t be luxurious enough for him. “Please make yourself at home. I’m sure you’ll find your way around, it isn’t that big. You can also make yourself a sandwich if you are okay with eating that. You can look through the fridge, or you can use the coffee machine, if you want hot coffee. I have tea too. I won’t be gone for that long though, so I guess I can make you something that is more to your taste. Or if you—”

“Maya,” he called, and I stopped moving backward.

In two long strides he was in front of me; I braced myself, more than aware of Ester’s presence behind me just a few feet away.

“I guess I can visit them tomorrow too if you don’t want to—” I murmured against his lips just before he kissed me. It was a barely there caress, but it still sent beautiful tingles through my body. It would’ve felt even nicer if Max hadn’t been stepping on my toes trying to get in between us.

“I want nothing but you. Don’t worry about me,” he whispered, and then his warmth was gone.

When I opened my eyes he was already halfway across my lawn. Taking a deep breath, I turned around and made my way to the slightly ajar door, knowing full well Ester was still lurking around, trying to get a better look at Alexander. A small smile playing on my lips, I tried to think of a fast way to assure Alan and Ester that I was feeling better and get back to Alexander ASAP.

Pushing the door open, I let Max get in before me and closed the door. As soon as I lifted my face, I was welcomed with two smiling faces looking happier than they ought to.

“What are you guys smiling at?” I asked, groaning when their smiles only got bigger. I knew they had seen the gentle touch, but apparently they’d watched the kiss, too. That would explain their grinning faces; I definitely agreed with them. That kiss deserved more than just a grinning face, but I wasn’t going to act like a sixteen-year-old and squeal in front of them.

Ignoring the big pink elephant in the room, I kissed them both and jumped right into the subject at hand to make them sure I was doing okay after selling my dad’s house.

Even though my heart still hurt, I didn’t want them to worry about me.

It took me fifteen minutes to assure them that everything was okay with me—fifteen very long minutes where I worried about what Alexander was doing in my house.

As I got up to get going, Alan whispered into my hair, “You’ll be okay, little girl.” His arms around me gave me much needed strength.

“I know. Having you guys around me helps. I don’t want you to worry about me. Yesterday was just harder than I thought it would be. I’m being unreasonable.”

“There is nothing unreasonable about this. We know how much you miss your dad, and it’s okay to be sad every once in a while. Don’t be too hard on yourself. You know, we are here for you whenever you need us.”

Max whined and gently hit my leg with his paw, showing me his support in his own way, I assume. Laughing, I bent down and gave him a quick scratch behind his ears.

“Okay, I’m going to leave now before you guys make me bawl my eyes out with all this love.”

“Yes, you shouldn’t make your friend wait. He looked really dashing, didn’t he, Alan?” Ester asked as she hugged her husband, resting her head on his shoulder.

I lifted my eyebrows, giving her a mock worried look. “Dashing? Sure, okay, if you say so, I guess.”

“Go on, get home now. It’s getting late,” she ushered me toward the door, Alan trailing right behind her.

“Wow, this a first from you, Ester. I’m not sure I like being kicked out by your wife,” I said, looking at Alan over my shoulder.

“Nothing I can do about it. If she says you shouldn’t leave the young man alone in your house, you should listen to her. But,” he insisted, lifting a finger to silence me, “if you don’t forget to bring my semlor with you the next time, I’ll see what I can do.”

Before I could even apologize for leaving them back at the café, I was gently pushed out the door and Ester was giving me a big wink. “If he is who I think he is, I’m expecting you to bring him over before he leaves.”

I opened my mouth to object, but she shushed me and closed the door in my face.

Standing in their yard for a few more minutes, I tried to gather whatever courage I had left and walked to my own door.

As soon as my hand closed around the handle, the door opened from inside and I lost my balance, falling face first into a hard, naked, very wet chest.

Big, warm hands closed around my arms and kept me from sliding down his body.

His
perfect
body.

“I’m sorry,” he sighed. “I saw you from the window, and you looked like you were about to run out on me. Thought I should just come out and get you myself.”