Lost at School (29 page)

“So you think we should just stick with Plan B and skip the detentions,” said Mr. Middleton.

“I think we should get Joey in here and discuss it with him,” said Dr. Bridgman. “He’ll probably be harder on himself than any of us would be.”

Mr. Middleton looked at Mrs. Woods and Mrs. Franco. “What do you think?”

“I like it,” said Mrs. Franco.

“Sounds fine,” said Mrs. Woods.

Mr. Middleton rose and invited Joey into his office. Joey glanced nervously at the four adults as he sat down. “Joey, as I told you, we thought it would be a good idea to talk about what happened on Friday. Remember?”

“Yes sir.”

“First off, how’s your hand?”

Joey looked down at his bandaged hand. “Nothing got broken.”

“Ah, good. Those lockers hit awfully hard, don’t they?”

“Um, yes sir.” Joey failed to recognize Mr. Middleton’s attempt at humor.

“Joey, I want to apologize for the fact that Mr. Owens didn’t know about the plan you had developed with Mrs. Woods. We should have let him know what was going on. But I’m sure you know that it’s not OK to leave the classroom without permission. And it’s not OK to hit lockers, either. We’d like to hear your ideas about what to do next.”

Dr. Bridgman wasn’t sure Joey understood what Mr. Middleton was asking for. “Joey, I think what Mr. Middleton is saying is that we’d like to talk about what we might do to try to make sure that what happened Friday doesn’t happen again.”

Joey wasn’t accustomed to being asked for his opinion, so his first proposal was something he’d heard adults say to him many times. “I could try harder.”

“Ah, that would be good, Joey,” said Mr. Middleton. “According to our school discipline code, I should be giving you detention for leaving the class without permission and in-school suspension for hitting the locker. But your teachers and Dr. Bridgman feel that punishing you might not be fair since it’s not your fault Mr. Owens didn’t know the plan and Mrs. Franco, here, feels you tried really hard not to get upset.”

“I don’t really mind doing in-school suspension,” said Joey. “I haven’t been in there yet this year.”

Dr. Bridgman smiled. “Well, Joey, I suppose you could do in-school suspension. But I’m wondering … besides the fact that Mr. Owens didn’t know the plan, is there anything else we should know about why you left the classroom?”

“I don’t know.”

“Well, let’s think about it a second,” said Dr. Bridgman. “We’re in no rush.”

Joey tried to think. “I don’t know.”

“I know the last time you got upset in the classroom you were embarrassed. Were you embarrassed this time?” asked Dr. Bridgman.

“Yes. Everybody was looking at me.”

“Here’s what I’m thinking,” said Dr. Bridgman. “You and Mrs. Woods have a really good plan in place to help with confusing assignments. And it’s working … when Mrs. Woods isn’t sick. Luckily, she’s not sick too often. But I’m thinking that we don’t have a plan yet for what to do when you get embarrassed. In fact, we don’t really know much about why you get embarrassed. So I’m thinking me and you and Mrs. Woods might need to have a conversation about that, just like we did about the confusing assignments. Then we could have a plan for helping you with embarrassment, too. What do you think?”

“OK.”

“Mrs. Woods, are there any good times today that we could do that?” asked Dr. Bridgman.

Mrs. Woods looked at Joey. “Well, if it’s not too embarrassing for you, we could do it during lunch … you could have lunch in the classroom with me today.”

“What do you think, Joey?” asked Dr. Bridgman.

Joey didn’t like this idea at all. “Um, well, the other kids …”

“I think you’d like to pick a different time,” smiled Mrs. Woods.

Joey looked relieved. “Yes.”

“Can you stay after school today?” asked Mrs. Woods. “No one will be around.”

“Yes.”

“I have some other meetings this afternoon,” said Dr. Bridgman. “So if you want me there …”

“I think Joey and I could try to work on this one on our own,” said Mrs. Woods. “Sound OK to you, Joey?”

Joey nodded.

“Sounds like a plan,” said Mr. Middleton.

Joey had a lingering concern. “Am I getting detentions … or in-school suspension?”

Mr. Middleton rubbed his jaw. “You know what, Joey, for now, because I’m seeing that you and Dr. Bridgman and your teachers are working hard on making sure these episodes don’t happen anymore, I think I’m going to hold off on the punishment. I won’t be able to do that every time … and I need you to try very hard not to leave the classroom or slam lockers with your fist anymore. Understood?”

“Yes sir.”

Mr. Middleton stood up. “OK, then, let’s get you and your teachers and Dr. Bridgman on your way, and I’ll check in with you all to find out how we’re doing.”

On their way out of Mr. Middleton’s office, Mrs. Woods pulled Dr. Bridgman aside. “Do you have a minute?”

“Sure, what’s up?”

“I realize I don’t know what I’m doing yet, but I tried Plan B with one of my other students last week.”

“You did? Fantastic!”

“Well, I don’t know how fantastic it was. We didn’t get very far.”

“How come?”

“I’m not really sure. I was hoping you could tell me what I did wrong.”

“Sure. What’s the kid’s name?”

“Consuelo. Very quiet kid … looks like she’s scared of her own shadow. I was thinking that since Plan B seems to be doing Joey some good, maybe I should try to do the same thing with her … you know, to try to help her participate a little more in class.”

Dr. Bridgman smiled. “Mrs. Woods, if everyone was as receptive to Plan B as you’ve been, I could retire.”

“I don’t think you’re in much danger of tapping into your retirement funds just yet.”

“So what happened?”

“I told her I’d noticed that she didn’t participate much in class discussions and I was wondering if she could tell me why. But she didn’t know. So I kept going with the second step, Define the Problem. I told her I thought she probably had a lot of good ideas and that it would be great if the other kids in the class could hear them. And then I asked her if she could think of ideas for how we could solve that problem. But she didn’t have any ideas.”

“Well, it sounds like you did the three steps of Plan B. But you may have rushed through the Empathy step before you actually got Consuelo’s concern on the table, so it wasn’t clear what problem you were trying to solve.”

“Yes, right, that’s what I thought,” said Mrs. Woods. “But, like I said, she didn’t know what her concern was.”

“Yes, exactly.”

Mrs. Woods wondered if Dr. Bridgman understood her dilemma. “So what should I have done?”

“You should have guessed.”

This answer took Mrs. Woods by surprise. “Guessed?”

“Yes, if she doesn’t know what’s getting in the way of her participating in class discussions, we’ll have to help her figure it out. Luckily, there are only a finite number of reasons she might not be participating in class discussions. Do you have any hypotheses about why it’s hard for her?”

“I know she’s had language therapy in the past. I was thinking maybe she wasn’t sure what to say, or doesn’t understand what the other kids are saying. But I didn’t know if I should go putting ideas into her head.”

“Oh, if she’s having difficulty putting her concerns on the table, it’s perfectly fine to hypothesize. So long as you’re open to the possibility that your hypotheses may be off base.”

“So I could have said something like, ‘Is it because you’re having trouble understanding what the other kids are saying?’”

“Yeah, that would be great,” said Dr. Bridgman.

“Guess I’m still trying to figure out what all the Plan B rules are.” Mrs. Woods smiled.

“No rules, really. Just some rules of thumb. But now you’re ready to go back and try to help Consuelo figure out what her concerns are. Then you guys can get the problem solved.”

“So if my first guess is wrong? Should I just keep guessing?”

“Sure, if you have other hypotheses.”

“Well, like I said, she’s scared of her own shadow. So maybe she’s just really nervous or afraid of what others will think of what she says.”

“Good hypothesis.”

Mrs. Woods seemed pleased. “Thanks, Coach.”

“Sure thing. Oh, by the way, I was talking to Joey’s mom on the phone the other day. I’d still like to see if we can find another time to meet with
her. I think it would be good for us all to sit down with her to tell her what we’re trying to do with Joey. She wants to help out.”

“That would be fine. Maybe she can take Joey’s place at one of our meetings before school. That is, if Joey’ll give up his time.”

“Good idea. I’ll run that by her. Maybe you can run it by Joey when you see him.”

Joey stayed after school for the conversation he’d scheduled with Mrs. Woods earlier in the day. Mrs. Woods, still feeling the lingering effects of her illness, suddenly realized she hadn’t really noticed Joey for most of the day. No signals. No problems.

“Joey, you’ve been very quiet today,” said Mrs. Woods. “Everything OK?”

“Well, there weren’t any assignments that I got confused about. So I guess I didn’t need you today.”

Mrs. Woods smiled. “No, I guess you didn’t need me today. Of course, there are other things we could be working on besides you not knowing what to do on an assignment.”

“Like what?”

“Well, remember what Dr. Bridgman said about how you sometimes get embarrassed in front of your classmates?”

“Oh, yeah,” said Joey, looking uncomfortable.

“I was thinking maybe we could try to figure out what it is that you’re getting embarrassed about.”

“OK.”

“So, what do you think?”

“About what?”

Mrs. Woods wondered if understanding Joey’s concerns was always going to be this hard. She tried to hide a deep breath. “I was wondering if you had any ideas about why you get embarrassed so easily in front of your classmates.”

Joey pondered the question. “I don’t know.”

“Take your time. There’s no rush.”

“See, I, uh, I’ve been getting in trouble at school for a long time.”

Mrs. Woods tried not to respond too quickly, hoping Joey would elaborate. She was not so lucky. “You’ve been getting in trouble in school for a long time.”

“And, see, I’m, uh, I’m kinda … tired …”

Mrs. Woods nodded her encouragement.

Joey shrugged. “I don’t think I know how to say it.”

“I think you’re doing fine.”

“It’s just, I’m tired of … of being the kid who always gets into trouble. I’m tired of being the kid who doesn’t know how to do assignments. I’m tired of being different.” Joey paused. “I want to be normal. For once.”

Mrs. Woods suddenly felt great tenderness for this student of hers. “I’m not sure what to say, Joey. I’m sorry you feel that way. I’m sorry you don’t feel normal. I really am.”

Joey felt the need to reassure his teacher. “That’s OK. I’m kinda used to it.”

“It’s not OK for you not to feel normal, Joey,” Mrs. Woods gently insisted.

Joey was silent.

“So help me understand something,” said Mrs. Woods, returning to Plan B. “I understand that you’re tired of feeling different. And that you’re tired of not feeling normal. But I’m not sure I understand how that makes you feel so embarrassed in front of the other kids.”

“’Cuz I know what they think of me. I know they’re looking at me like I’m some … some kind of
freak.
Like I’m messed up or something. So when I don’t know how to do an assignment, and I’m trying hard not to get upset, and then I get upset anyways, I know that’s what they’re thinking. It just makes me …”

“More upset,” said Mrs. Woods, finishing Joey’s sentence.

“Yeah. So, anyways, I don’t think there’s anything you can do to help me with any of this.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure about that. How do you know the other kids think you’re messed up?”

“Well, they tell me I’m stupid,” said Joey, “and call me names.”

“What names?”

“Like ‘head case.’ Or ‘moron.’ And other ones I can’t say to you.”

“I see what you mean,” Mrs. Woods said grimly. “Tell me, do
you
think you’re a head case? Or a moron?”

“I know there’s something the matter with me.”

“And you think something’s the matter with you because …”

“Because I’m the only one in the class who goes nuts, and needs shrinks, and medicine.” Joey looked at Mrs. Woods. “Still think you can help me?”

“Joey, I’m wondering if there’s anything I could do to help you not think there’s something the matter with you … and to help you worry a little less about what you believe the other kids are thinking.”

“Huh?”

“What I mean is, well, now that I’m getting to know you, I don’t think you’re messed up at all. So, now that
I
know that, I wonder how I could help
you
know that?”

Joey wasn’t quite following. “I don’t know.”

“I don’t, either. I’d like to think about it some more. How ’bout we talk about it again next time we meet?”

“OK.”

“Good, then,” said Mrs. Woods, who, despite her fatigue, had a fresh look of determination. “By the way, is it OK with you if I meet with your mom during one of our morning meetings? She’d like to know more about how to help you, too.”

“Instead of me, you mean?”

“If that’s OK …”

“Are you gonna tell her about the stuff we talk about?”

“If there’s anything you don’t want me to tell her, just let me know.”

Joey considered this. “I guess it’s OK for her to know.”

“And you don’t mind me taking one of our mornings to meet with her?”

“No, that’s OK. Only one, right?”

“Right. Joey, I’m glad you told me what was embarrassing you. I think it’s something we can work on. And now at least you know that there’s one person in our class who doesn’t think you’re a head case or a moron.”

“Who?”

“Me.”

Mrs. Franco stuck her head inside Mrs. Woods’ classroom a few days later. “You ready to go? I’ll walk out with you.”

“No, not quite,” said Mrs. Woods. “You go ahead.”

“What’re you doing?” asked Mrs. Franco.

“Practicing,” said Mrs. Woods.