Lone Wolf Pack 06 - A Future for His Werewolf Warrior (8 page)

Ward wasn't sure what to say to that, but he decided that maybe honesty was the best policy. "I'm not sure I did much of anything. I simply ran into him. Literally."

"Sometimes, that's enough." Will's expression sobered. "Mathias tells me you think you're a replacement for me."

The sudden change in topic and atmosphere jarred Ward. It embarrassed him to have his personal affairs exposed like that, but he supposed he wasn't surprised Mathias had gone to Will to pour out his troubles. Did that mean Will knew about Ward's past with Peter? God, Ward hoped not.

As if guessing Ward's thoughts, Will continued. "Mathias said that you had a bad experience, although he hasn't given me the details. I won't press, and anything you do from here on is completely your choice and your call. I just came to explain a few things—things that I wish I'd had someone explain to
me
when I was younger."

"What things?" Ward asked, his voice trembling.

"You see, Mr. Bennett, werewolves and other such beings don't think like we do. Mathias might look human, but he isn't. I'm sure that at an intellectual level, you understand that, since you've seen him shift, but actually grasping what it means is harder. Sometimes, I still have trouble."

Ward licked his lips nervously. "Is this about the mate thing?" Mathias had mentioned it during their last conversation, and Ward knew enough about wolves to read between the lines and understand what the concept meant for him and Mathias.

"Indeed. My guess is that you already know how wolves mate in the wild, so I won't prolong this unnecessarily. Basically, many shifters and other such paranormal creatures take mates. Their advanced senses help them identify their other halves. It is as easy as scenting them, or looking at them for the first time."

Ward scowled and opened his mouth to speak, but Will stopped him before he could utter a single word. "I know what you're going to say. Does it mean anything if it's just chemistry? Does he really want me or is it just his body telling him he does? They're all questions I asked myself at one time, and for many years, I told myself I should have been more cautious. My mate, the father of my child, had left me despite all the promises we'd made to one another. It didn't mean anything. Except it did. I still loved him, and he still loved me—for decades."

Will sighed. "I suppose ours is not the best example, but what I'm trying to say... Werewolves
know
. It isn't something we as humans can always rationalize. We experience it to some extent, but not like them."

"Okay, fair enough," Ward managed to cut in. "But how does that translate into Mathias loving you for so long?"

"It's because Mathias isn't only a werewolf. He's half-Sidhe. I must admit I had my own doubts about your relationship when he first came to me, but then I understood... His magic is like another sense, and the similarities between the two of us confused it." Much to Ward's surprise, Will reached for his hand. "I know this is very odd for you, Mr. Bennett, but you have to consider... Mathias has been alone for a long time. He's been alive longer than the entire Mulligan line existed. That sort of thing leaves a mark."

Mathias had already told Ward about his age, but Ward had never taken the time to fully process it. Now that his great-uncle was explaining it, that seemed foolish and selfish.

Will released his hand and leaned against the back of the couch. "The last thing I want is to pressure you, but I understand how a human's mind works. Mathias... He endures. It's what he's done for decades, for centuries. It's what he knows. And at this point, I think his perception of time is a little warped. He decided to give you some room to breathe, like you asked, and while I respect that choice on his side and yours, it occurred to me that his patience might be counterproductive. I'm sorry for intervening in a private situation, but I do care about him, and you are after all, Karl's grandson. So maybe I feel just a little bit entitled to do it."

Will smiled, and a mix of discomfort and yearning twisted in Ward's chest. There was something paternal and fond about the way Will was looking at him, and if not for the worm of jealousy still poisoning Ward's heart, he'd have been inclined to crumple into the man's embrace and sob on his shoulder. Instead, he said, "He loved you, you know. Grandfather. I'm not sure if Mathias told you, but Grandfather always regretted how things ended between the two of you."

Will's eyes widened and his breath caught. "He did?"

Ward nodded. "He told me so many things about you... I think, in my heart, I always wondered if he only cared about me because he couldn't care about you, and maybe it fueled this thing with Mathias." Shaking his head, Ward huffed. "But it's not fair to his memory to say that now. I just... I wanted you to know, because
he
would've wanted you to know."

Will swallowed, his Adam's apple bobbing in an obvious show of emotion. "What else did he tell you?"

Ward couldn't resist that question, so he ended up recounting to Will stories of his grandfather and how he'd grown up. Sometimes, Will would laugh and reminisce along with those very same memories Ward only knew second-hand. It made Ward feel better, even if in a way, they were just avoiding the reason Will had come here to begin with.

He couldn't avoid it forever, he realized. Will hadn't given him any advice or any suggestion, and for that Ward was thankful, because in the end, this was his choice, and his heart. He had to try again, to really listen and give Mathias the chance to tell him what he'd been trying to say that day.

"Where is he now?" he asked Will. "Mathias, I mean."

"He's back at my place, with my son. As you probably know, he's helping Jessie through the last stages of his pregnancy."

"Yes, he told me. I admit it's still very weird for me to even consider."

"It is." Will fixed him with piercing green eyes. "But I just want you to know one thing. No matter how strange it's been, no matter how much it hurt and how much fear or pain I experienced... It's all been worth it. I can't say I have no regrets, because I do. I spent decades separated from my mate, resenting him for abandoning Jessie and me. It was hard for me to let go, even when we met again. But in the end, it was worth it."

Will didn't say it, but Ward heard the unspoken words anyway.
It could be worth it for you too.
Ward wanted nothing more than to believe that, to be able to let go of all his doubts and trust Mathias.

Well, he knew what the first step was. Taking a deep breath, he asked, "Would it be too much of an imposition if I visited your pack today?"

Will grinned. "Not at all. In fact, I was hoping you'd say that."

****

The warm energy pulsed through Mathias, content and alive. His magic entwined with the two distinctive threads he was testing, soothing and caressing. He didn't push too much—it wasn't his place—and when he was satisfied about the information he'd received, he pulled back, retreating from Jessie's body.

No sooner had he done so than an agitated question filled his ears. "Well? How are they?"

Mathias opened his eyes and arched a brow at Andreas. "Everything is in order, Mr. Brandt. I've told you already. Your mate's condition is stabilized, and the children are healthy and happy. This was merely a routine checkup."

He patted Jessie's belly and grinned. "But then, I gather Jessie already knew that."

"I did." Jessie smiled happily. "I have no words to thank you. I never realized how bad I was doing until you came along."

Mathias wanted to say there was no need for any thanks, but before he could do so, something in the energy around him shifted. It was distant still, but getting closer. A few moments later, Mathias easily identified it. His mate was nearby.

It had taken a lot of resolve for Mathias to respect Ward's decision. Sometimes, he still went to the house, in shifted form, but he didn't actually approach Ward. It had been hard as hell, and it wasn't any easier to remain calm now instead of bursting out of Jessie and Andreas's bedroom like he wanted.

Still, the change in his mood must have shown because Jessie shot him a concerned look. "Is everything okay?"

"Everything's fine, pup," Mathias replied with a strained smile. "I just think we have visitors."

His words were soon confirmed as Andreas's senses registered the approaching car as well. "I think it must be Will."

Mathias nodded. In fact, he wouldn't be surprised in the slightest if that was the case. He'd known his friend was worried about him, and the idea that Will had gone to talk to Ward was the likeliest explanation.

"I'll be right back," he offered absently. "I need to check something over with him."

Andreas and Jessie let him go without comment, and Mathias was thankful for it because he didn't know if he could come up with a better explanation. He left the house just in time to see Will pull in. Predictably, he had Ward with him, and the two humans got out at the vehicle at the same time.

Time seemed to freeze when Ward finally caught sight of Mathias. Their gazes met and Ward stopped walking. Mathias wanted nothing more than to move and meet his mate halfway, but he couldn't make his muscles work.

Will didn't say a word. He simply slid past Mathias and into the house, leaving him alone with Ward. The door closed with a slight click, and the noise finally made Mathias shake out of his stupor. He took a few steps forward, walking steadily until he was in front of Ward. His hands were trembling, so he stuck them in the pockets of his jeans, trying to steady himself. "Hi," he greeted his mate. "I didn't think you wanted to see me."

"I did and didn't." Ward shot him a sheepish smile. "That's probably confusing, isn't it?"

"You're allowed to be confused," Mathias told his mate. "You're also allowed to take all the time you need. I know this is far from an ideal situation."

"Life is rarely ideal," Ward answered. He inhaled deeply and looked up at the sky. In turn, Mathias stared at the exposed column of Ward's neck, wanting nothing more than to kiss and nibble at his mate's skin.

When Ward looked at him once again, he was smiling. "But that's fine, I think. Nothing is perfect, not people and not art. Our imperfections make us who we are. So... If you're willing to be patient with me, do you want to try this again?"

Mathias's breath caught. "Are you giving me another chance?"

Ward snorted. "I'm not sure I gave you the first one. I'm sorry. I was rash and I pushed you away. I want to understand. Please help me understand."

The underlying words were 'please make me believe'. Mathias had no doubt that his mate still had trouble trusting anyone and such a huge leap of faith was a gift. Mathias would not waste it.

He offered Ward his hand, and when Ward took it, he kissed the tip of his mate's fingers. "It's okay, Ward. We have all the time in the world."

Something danced in Ward's eyes and he laughed lightly, like he knew something Mathias didn't. "What's so funny?" Mathias asked, puzzled, but not offended.

"Nothing," Ward replied, shaking his head. He pulled on Mathias's hand, guiding him away from the house. "Come on. Where is this den of yours?"

Mathias gave Ward a look of disbelief. "Are you serious? Why would you want to go there?"

Ward shrugged. "I don't know. I just want to."

There was something beyond the nonchalance involved in the gesture, something that kept Mathias from resisting or protesting any further. Besides, he wanted to get his mate alone, and he was acutely aware of all the people inside the house. Mathias's wolf wasn't too happy about having the Alphas so close to the mate he hadn't claimed, so he happily embraced the offer.

Instead of walking, though, he chose the easier, faster version. He picked Ward up in his arms, making his mate yelp in surprise.

Okay, so his impulse had very little to do with expedience and was more about his desire to be close to his mate again. Thankfully, Ward seemed to understand that, because after that brief moment of confused struggle, he quieted down in Mathias's arms.

There was something peaceful and unique in carrying his mate through the forest toward a place he had made his own. The silence around them, Ward's scent, his warmth, his unconscious sensuality—it soothed the hole in Mathias's heart, the one he'd been desperately trying to patch since his argument with his mate.

And maybe he wasn't the only one who felt that way, because Ward murmured, "I missed you, Mathias."

"I missed you too, Ward," Mathias replied. "You have no idea how much."

"Is this really happening?" Ward tightened his hold on Mathias's neck. "Do you really want me for me?"

"You're all I've ever wanted. And I know that sounds a little crazy when I say it out loud, but inside... It feels right."

Ward nodded and set his head on Mathias's shoulder. "It does. Right."

That one word was perhaps the best way to describe what Mathias felt for his mate. His magic, his heart, his body all screamed it. No, the world wasn't perfect, and neither were the two of them, but together they fit perfectly nonetheless.

In no time, they reached Mathias's den. It was at that point that Mathias began to feel a little apprehensive. He'd cleaned up the place a bit, but in the end, it was still a cave. It might be suitable for Mathias's wolf, but for Ward, not so much.

Still, Ward scanned the den with obvious interest. He gasped lightly when he passed through the wards keeping the place secure. "What was that?"

"My magic. I'm not here a lot, so I cast a spell that would keep anyone, or anything, from wandering inside."

It didn't seem to have worked on his mate, at least not the way it was intended. In fact, Ward turned toward him, and his eyes flared with heat. "I like it."

Mathias almost swallowed his own tongue. Clearly, that was the understatement of the century, because the burst of his power had touched Ward at some level Mathias had not originally expected. "I like it a lot."

"I see," Mathias replied. He had not planned for anything sensual to happen—they were in the middle of nowhere, after all, and his mate deserved better. But Ward's gaze on him was so hot and open, full of every desire they'd done their best to suppress. Mathias's wolf howled, snarling at him to claim the beautiful human.