Locomotion (5 page)

 

And for a long, long time just stares
down at her hands.

Hip Hop Rules the World,
Lamont said
grinning like somebody had told him
he'd just won the lotto.

 

But all it was was Ms. Marcus saying
Of course rap is poetry!
One of the most creative forms.

 

So now Lamont's writing lyrics
and bopping his head
and every chance he gets
saying
Hip Hop Rules the World
and

 

It's one of the most creative forms
and
Hey Dog! Guess who else is a poet now!

There's two of me and Lili.
We were little then, dressed up at Easter time
Big smiles—me with two front teeth missing
and my head shaved Easter clean.
Here's Mama and Daddy dancing,
Mama's blurry foot lifted up in the air.
Look how she's laughing.

 

When I look at the picture I can hear it.

 

Here's the four of us
Everybody smiling at the camera but
me. I'm looking away from it
frowning
Like I see something coming
that ain't good.

He says
My name is
Clyde not New Boy, not Country,
not Straw Head Cotton-Picker Dirt-Eater Bumpkin.
Just Clyde. Easy to say. Easy to remember.
Why don't soma y'all try to use it sometime.
After all,
he says
I thought city people was supposed to be smart.

This afternoon I come home to find
Miss Edna dancing with the broom
The broom's swishing across the floor and Miss Edna
got a tight hold on its blue handle and singing
along with the radio. She's kind
of soft-shoeing the poor broom back and forth
across the kitchen floor like her mind
is gone. That's what I'm thinking, praying
Please Lord don't let Miss Edna's mind be gone
'cause I was just getting used to living here
Please Lord me and her don't always get along but
she's all I got right now
when Miss Edna turns
to me with the biggest smile I seen in a long time
and says
My Rodney is coming for Easter
My Rodney is bringing himself on home for a while
Then she's swish-swishing off again with me
just standing there feeling the relief lift me up and
set me right back down in Miss Edna's kitchen again.

When I was born I didn't even
weigh four pounds, Mama used to tell me.
See this chicken I'm about to cut up and fry?
You were even smaller than it. Doctors said
there's a little bit we can do but mostly you
have to hope hard
and pray.
Mama cut the wing off the chicken, rinsed
it under the faucet, patted it dry—real gentle
like she was deep remembering.
So I hoped and prayed and sat by that tiny
baby every hour of every day for weeks
and more weeks. Doctors said it's his lungs,
they're just not ready for the world yet. Can't
take a breath in. Can't let one out. So I breathed
for you, trying to show you how, I
prayed to those lungs,
Mama said.
Grow!
The chicken was cut up, spiced up, dipped
in flour and ready to fry. Mama touched each piece
still real gentle before she slipped it into the hot
oil.
Then you were four pounds, five pounds, six pounds
bigger than this chicken. My big little baby boy
not even two months old and already
a survivor.

The #52 bus takes a long time coming and even though
it's the first day of spring it's still a little cold so when
the #69 comes real fast, I think That's God. And when
the heat's turned up real high inside the bus and I
ain't shivering no more, I think That's God too.

 

And then I'm walking the blocks to Lili's new mama's
house and when I get there, I see Lili standing at the
window waving and grinning and I think
There's God.

Lili's new mama lives on a pretty block with trees and
brownstone houses that all look alike so if you don't
know the address you end up knocking on a stranger's
door even if you been there a couple of times before.
Now I know Lili's mama's house is the one with yellow
curtains on the second floor and, most times, with Lili
in the window.

 

We sit in the living room. It smells like lemon and Lili
says, “That's what we clean the floor with.” The floors
are made of wood and there's pretty rugs in different
spots. Not a whole lot of furniture but enough to find
a nice place to sit. I don't lean back though cause Lili's
new mama will give me a look. There's chocolate chip
cookies and two glasses of milk on the coffee table.
I take one cookie and eat it real slow even though I
want to take a whole bunch at one time. Then I take
a little sip of milk and make sure to set my glass back
down on the coaster thing 'cause I know Lili's new
mama is watching me from the kitchen. There's bright
sun coming in through the big windows and the house
is like this yellow-gold color and warm. Even though
Lili's new mama doesn't like me, I'm glad that my sister
has such a nice place to sleep at night. And I'm glad
she has a nice room to sit in and eat chocolate chip
cookies and drink milk outa blue glasses that make
you think of nights up on the roof in the summertime.

 

God's in this room,
I whisper to Lili.
She looks at me a minute without saying anything.
Then she smiles.
God is everywhere,
I say.

 

And with the sun coming in the room that way
and my sister smiling so big and the plate
of cookies there if you want them, just take one
at a time and chew it slow
I feel Him, right there beside us.

On Sundays, the preacher gives everyone a chance
to repent their sins. Miss Edna makes me go
to church. She wears a bright hat
I wear my suit. Babies dress in lace.

 

Girls my age, some pretty, some not so
pretty. Old ladies and men nodding.

 

Miss Edna every now and then throwing her hand
in the air. Saying
Yes, Lord
and
Preach!

 

I sneak a pen from my back pocket,
bend down low like I dropped something.

 

The chorus marches up behind the preacher
clapping and humming and getting ready to sing.

 

I write the word HOPE on my hand.

Takes the soccer ball
around the school yard eight times
His feet are magic.

The news people from Channel 7 Eyewitness
News came to our school. 'Cause guess what?
Ms. Marcus is the Teacher of the Year.
Ms. Marcus smiling all proud brought them
right into our classroom and we all crowded
around the cameras, pulling at the mikes, making
faces into the camera, getting into trouble.

 

Me and Angel was standing together and we
heard the newsman talking to Ms. Marcus about
inner-city and underserved and Angel looked at me
That's the nice way of saying poor,
he said.
What poor person's daddy can afford to buy him
hundred-dollar kicks?
He held up his foot to the camera
showing off his new sneaker. The newsman heard
him. He put the mike in Angel's face and said
Tell me about this man.
He don't live with us,
Angel said,
but he comes every
night to
read me and my sister a book or to watch some TV with
us before
we go to bed.
Angel got quiet after that, pushed the mike

away from his face. For a minute, the newsman
just stood there—then quick fast, he turned to me
asked
What do you like about your teacher?
Someone
behind me said math and poetry. I shushed her.

 

Not math,
I said.
Just the poetry.

 

Well, why don't you read us something,
the newsman said.
His hair looked like it was sprayed with a whole can
of hairspray. It looked hard and shiny. Everybody
ran to get their poetry books saying
Me, Me,
but the
newsman kept looking at me.
No,
he said.
I'd like to hear something
from this gentleman.
I looked at Ms. Marcus and she
nodded.

 

 

So I read the poem about birth, real slow, the way
Ms. Marcus said
we should read our poetry,
so everybody could understand it.
After I finished, nobody said anything for a long time.
Then the newsman started grinning
Ms. Marcus smiled and the newsman
just sort of shook his head, nodding and looking at me.
Then Lamont said
That poem's corny. It don't even rhyme.
But Angel said
I liked it.
And some other kids said

At church, the preacher goes on about Christ rising
back up. There's palms everywhere and Easter
lilies in big pots. Everybody's dressed all nice—
ladies in big hats,
guys in suits. Little girls in pink and yellow and white
dresses like Easter eggs.

 

Was it a big sacrifice to give your life
if you knew you was gonna rise back up?
I mean, isn't that like just taking a nap?

 

I listen to the preacher. I listen to the people going
Amen
and
Yes, Lord.
I run my hand across
Lili's Bible. Some days I feel like I don't know
nothing about nothing.

He comes in the door and sets a big duffel bag down,
lifts Miss Edna up like she weighs two pounds
and she's laughing
and punching
his shoulders and crying all at the same time.
Then he lifts me up, says
Look at Little Brother Lonnie
all growed up
You almost a man now, aren't you.

 

Little brother.
Little brother Lonnie.
My big brother Rodney.
Imagine that!

 

There's roast beef and ribs and potato salad.
There's rice and peas and corn bread and greens.
There's sweet potatoes and macaroni and cheese and
even some fried okra
There's three kinds of pie and two kinds of cake
and we eat
and we eat and we eat till the thought of eating
another bite makes us feel like crying.
All the while Rodney's telling us how he's come on home,
gonna get himself a job here. Says
Ain't nothing for me upstate anymore.
He has Miss Edna's dark skin and straight teeth. They
even laugh the same.

He's tall and his shoulders are wide like somebody
who could
get a pro football contract if they wanted to.
I lift my own skinny shoulders, wishing they'd spread
out like Rodney's do.

 

Little Brother, he called me.

 

The kitchen is warm.
Miss Edna can't stop grinning.
Rodney's voice sounds like it should always be
in this house.

 

Little Brother, he called me.
Little Brother Lonnie.

 

Liliana C. Motion
Born in October
died in December
But that's not all
that I remember.

It's almost May
and yesterday
I saw a firefly.

 

You don't see
them a lot
in the city.

 

Sometimes
in the park
in the near dark
one comes out
you'll hear
a little kid shout

 

 

It's almost May
and yesterday
I caught a firefly in my hand.

 

First firefly I
seen in a
long, long time.

 

Make a wish,
Miss Edna said.

 

The newspapers said it was electrical
bad wiring in the basement or maybe the first floor.
We lived on the third.
Five rooms counting the kitchen
and the kitchen was big.
The newspapers said two people died
and right on the next line was their names.
The newspapers said survived by
Lili and Lonnie Motion. Ages 4 and 7.
A bus was leaving real early for the Bronx Zoo
and Mama and Daddy had a date by themselves
Pastor Marshall's daughter was taking a bunch of kids
so we all slept over at her house
And Mama and Daddy had a date
That made me and Lili laugh
Married people don't go on dates,
I said.
And Mama and Daddy shooed us on out of the house
into Pastor Marshall's daughter Sarah's car.
You two be good,
Mama said.
And Lili blew her a kiss.

 

You think it's still flying through the air somewhere?

It was the trees first,
Rodney tells me.
It's raining out. But the rain is light and warm.
And the sky's not all close to us like it gets
sometimes. It's way up there with
some blue showing through.
Late spring sky,
Ms. Marcus says.
Almost summer sky.
And when she said that, I said
Hey Ms. Marcus, that's a good title
for a poem, right?
You have a poet's heart, Lonnie.
That's what Ms. Marcus said to me.
I have a poet's heart.
That's good. A good thing to have.
And I'm the one who has it.