Lizard Loopy (6 page)

“Why? We're here now. Might as well check it out!” Danny said.

“No—you don't understand. And I can't believe I didn't tell you this. Look—you're a lizard!” Josh was looking edgily into the hole past Danny.

“Yeah! Great, isn't it? All those insects I used to be scared of,” beamed Danny. “I can eat 'em! Not that I would, of course . . . I mean . . . eeeyuw!”

Josh didn't point out the half an ant stuck to Danny's upper lip. “Yes, but you're not off the menu! I told you! Bigger things will eat you . . .”

“Yeah—you said. Cats and dogs and foxes . . . but I can't see any of those showing up here, can you? Not this high up!”

“I didn't get to the end of the list!”

“What? What else is there?” Danny said, but Josh wasn't looking at him anymore. His almond-shaped black eyes were bulging and shiny and fixed on something behind Danny. On something on the other side of the carpet of death. Something peering out from behind a screen of old trunk wood.

Something went “Keu-uu-wik!”

Before he could even scream, the talons closed around Danny—and around Josh too. And Josh knew this time it really was all over.

Josh shut his eyes, readying himself for the horrible moment when his entrails were hooked out of his belly by the small but vicious beak of the tawny owl that loomed over him. He didn't want to see that happen to Danny either. He hoped it would all be over fast.

But suddenly he felt himself swoop upward, the air whistling past his head. His eyes sprang open, and he realized he was paragliding high through the trees, the tawny wings above him making barely a sound against the air currents. “JOSH!” squeaked Danny, who was riding in the owl's other talon, his arms and legs flailing wildly. “Where's he taking us?!”

“She,” corrected Josh. “She went kee-uu-wick . . . or t-wit, if you like. Females do the t-wit. Males do the t-woo.”

“Does it matter?” Danny squawked. “I mean—helloooo!—certain death only seconds away and you're still being a nature nerd!”

“It could matter,” yelled Josh. “If she's a mom!”

“Doesn't seem very motherly to me!” wailed Danny as their deadly pilot made a tight, stomach-flipping turn to the left, avoiding some viciously spiked hawthorn twigs by inches.

“No—but she might still be mothering her teenagers,” called Josh, feeling the faintest flicker of hope. “I think she must be. That's why she didn't eat us herself. She's probably chucking some food at her kids. They're out of the nest now but still hanging around like . . . you know, like Jenny.” Their teenage sister was fiercely independent . . . as long as Mom made all her meals and ironed all her clothes and drove her everywhere.

“Rii-ight.” Danny gulped, now trying to keep still because the talons only tightened around his chest when he wriggled. “So we're teen munchies, then! Just a couple of cans of Pringles! How is that better?”

“Well . . .” quavered Josh as the owl swooped down and leveled out, flying low and straight with great purpose. “They might not be able to caaaaaaaaaaaaaaatch!”

The talons released, and they were both flung through the air in the direction of two young tawnies sitting side by side on the top of a battered old wooden hut beneath the trees.

Josh hit the wooden roof at high speed and rolled over and over. Even as his world spun and flipped like a rollercoaster, he was aware of the young birds leaping up and around, huge brown and cream wings flapping, curved talons out. Mom had just come back from the store.

“ROLL ON!” Danny bellowed, to his left, and Josh did. He kept tumbling over and over even as the lamp-like eyes of one of the owlets closed in on his head and a talon reached for him. Danny plunged over the edge of the roof and down into the ivy that climbed up it. Crackles, snaps, and yelps filled the air. Josh was determined to follow him when an awful, hot, stabbing pain shot through his tail. The owl's talon had pierced right through and into the wood underneath it, pinning him to his doom.

“GETOFFME! GETOFFME!” Josh shrieked and threw himself wildly from side to side, but the young owl had him now and was peering at him curiously, taking its time. It tilted its terrifyingly beautiful face to one side and gazed at him through two huge, unblinking dark orbs.

“Let me have a bit,” said the other young owl.

“You had yours,” said the first.

“Nah—it went over the back,” complained the other.

“Not my fault,” said the first. And it lowered its beak to Josh's poor soft belly.

SNAP! Josh suddenly pinged away, freed from the talon spike, and was over the edge of the old hut and tumbling down through the ivy in half a second. The owl gave a cry of annoyance. “See! Now you know how it feels,” said the other one.

They didn't try to go after their departed meal. The ivy and brambles at the foot of the old hut were too thick to get through. As Josh came to rest on the lowest tangle of undergrowth, he couldn't even speak. The wind had been knocked out of him.

“Josh! Jo-o-oosh!” Suddenly Danny was scrambling across to him. “I thought you were a goner that time! I really did.” He sniffed. “How did you get away?”

“I—I don't know . . .” Josh croaked. He was lying on his back exposing his pale belly, which had so nearly been a warm, skin-crusted casserole for owl-kind. His tail hurt, strangely, quite high up, considering the talon had gone through the bottom half.

“Whoa—bro! I think you should take a look at this,” murmured Danny, pulling Josh up by his shoulder. Danny pointed a shaking green finger at the bottom end of his brother.

Josh's tail was now just a stump.

“Eeeugh,” shuddered Danny. The stump was bleeding.

Josh flipped himself upright and curled what was left of his tail around to scrutinize it. In fact it wasn't bleeding that much—just across the wound; not spurting all over the place like it would be if someone cut his leg off. Josh couldn't see any snapped-off tailbone amid the goo. Instead of gaping in horror, though, he grinned. “That is SO amazing!” he said. “I'd forgotten about that!”

“What?” Danny was still looking revolted and a little panicky. “I don't know why you're so chirpy. What if you S.W.I.T.C.H. back and find you've lost a foot or something?”