Living a Lie (42 page)

How she yearned for all of that. Not with Jack but with Harry. Her first and last love.

Lying on the bed, she let the memories wash over her. For a while she was happy, with Harry.

Exhausted, she fell asleep. When she woke it was pitch black in the room, and for a moment she was startled. Then she heard the rumbling of traffic outside, the wail of a police siren and the laughter from a group of people beneath her window.

“You’ll soon be jumping at your own shadow,” she chided herself.

Even so, she could not altogether rid herself of the awful feeling that she was in danger; not because of Georgie or Mac, and not even because of the moneylenders. In their own way each had put her through the wringer. She was strong enough to cope with all of that. But Jack!

It was Jack who had stabbed her in the heart. Jack who had put an impossible price on friendship. Jack who had shocked her to her very roots, and was demanding to own the rest of her life. That was why she felt threatened. In danger of losing the only thing she possessed: herself. She had turned to him because he was the only one who could help her, and now he wanted her very soul in exchange.

She undressed, and bathed, then put on her nightgown and went to the window where she drew back the curtains and gazed into the night. The skyline of Liverpool was an imposing sight: tall thin church-spires reaching to heaven; steep tiled roofs and towering multi-storey office blocks and flats; the old and the new mingling perfectly, making a jagged pattern across a dark cloudless sky.

“So this is Liverpool.” She smiled with a strange kind of contentment.

“You’re very beautiful,” she breathed and, for a moment, wondered about all the people down there. People with worries; people filled with hatred and love;

lonely people; others struggling to cope with extended families.

Families. That was what life was all about.

“Isn’t that what you want.

Kitty? To have a family of your very own? “

She thought about her conversation with Jack. He had given her no choice.

“Would it be so bad?” she asked herself.

“You can’t have Harry, and you desperately need children of your own. For all his faults, Jack will make a good father. Tell him yes. Kitty. Let him take care of you. Georgie will be out of trouble and you’ll have a real home. Tell him yes. What difference does it make now?” None at all, she decided. Being married to Jack would not greatly enhance her life, it was true. But then, it would not altogether destroy it either.

However, she decided he could suffer a little for his devious ways.

“Make him wait,” she told herself. And the idea gave her a certain satisfaction.

The next morning, after a good night’s sleep, Kitty came into the dining room and ordered a hearty cooked breakfast two sausages, a slice of crispy bacon, one egg and two pieces of fried bread.

“Disgustingly delicious,” she muttered as it was set before her.

When every scrap of that was eaten, she drank two cups of coffee and left a pound for the waitress. As she walked towards the telephone in the foyer, she chuckled at the size of the breakfast she had just enjoyed.

“The prisoner ate a hearty meal,” she chuckled, trying to convince herself that it wouldn’t be as bad as she feared, being Jack’s ‘prisoner’.

He was thrilled.

“We’ll be happy, you’ll see,” he cried over the phone.

“You always knew it was only a matter of time before we tied the knot.”

“Yes, round my neck,” she answered under her breath.

“I’ve got an important buyer coming in tomorrow, but I’ll have time enough to go to the bank and make the necessary arrangements for the money. I’ll see you Friday morning, darling.”

“Thank you.” Kitty’s voice was cold; so was her heart.

“Take care of yourself. Remember, I love you.”

She put the phone down.

“I’ll never forgive you, Jack,” she muttered harshly. But she was grateful for the money. Grateful that she could help Georgie.

There was always a price to pay in this life, Kitty thought as she made her way to the hospital. The trouble was, she seemed always to be paying.

Georgie couldn’t believe her ears.

“Jack’s settling the debt! Oh Kitty! You can’t know what a weight you’ve

taken off my shoulders. ” She cried with relief, and after that she went from strength to strength.

The following morning, she was released into Kitty’s care and a room was arranged for her at the hotel. Kitty took her out for the best meal she had ever had, and afterwards they talked until the early hours.

“How can I pay him back?” Georgie wanted to know.

“Don’t worry about it,” Kitty told her.

“It isn’t a loan, it’s a gift.” My gift to you, she thought, and the realisation was bittersweet.

Georgie asked about Mildred’s wedding, and Kitty gave her every detail.

“I wish I could have been there,” Georgie sighed.

“Only, well you know why I couldn’t.” They were quiet for a time then she asked, “What about Harry?”

Taken unawares, Kitty couldn’t hide the love she felt for that man.

“What about him?” she asked innocently.

“Oh, come off it. Kitty Marsh!” Georgie tormented. “You know very well what I mean. You told me in your letter that your aunt had asked him to the wedding. Did he come? What did you say to each other? Is he still as handsome as ever? I want to know everything.”

In answer to her questions, Kitty told her, “No, Harry couldn’t come to the wedding but he came to my party, and yes, he’s every bit as handsome as ever. We didn’t get the chance to talk much. His wife wanted to leave early. It was a long drive home so they left before everyone else.”

“Long drive? Where does Harry live?”

“I thought I told you that in my letter?”

“You probably did, but you know what a memory I’ve got, so tell me again.”

“Blackburn. Harry and his wife live in Blackburn.”

Georgie’s eyes screwed up in concentration.

“Hmm! Not too far from here then?”

“Not too far.” Though it might as well be the other end of the world, Kitty thought.

“What’s his wife like? Not as pretty as you, I’ll bet.”

“She’s very attractive.”

“Harry doesn’t love her.”

“Why do you say that?”

“How can he love her when he loves you?”

“You couldn’t be more wrong, Georgie. Harry and his wife are very happy together. Susan’s expecting their first baby.”

“He’ll probably adore the baby ‘cause he’s as daft about kids as you are. But he doesn’t love his wife.”

Kitty thought it was time to change the subject.

“It’s late. You should be in bed,” she told her.

“You won’t come back to the south with me, so we’re going to be busy tomorrow. We’ve got to find you a decent place to live.” She ran her fingers through the newspaper cuttings on the table.

“There’s all these to check out, and more besides, if none of these are suitable.”

Picking up one of the cuttings, Georgie skimmed through it.

“I’ve already told you, these places are too expensive, and they want three months’ rent in advance.”

Kitty was adamant.

“And I’ve already told you … leave it to me.”

Rising from her chair, she rounded the table and kissed Georgie on the cheek.

“Now get off to bed.”

When Georgie had gone to her own room. Kitty glanced once more through the cuttings.

“You’re right,” she admitted, ‘they are expensive, but I don’t intend leaving you in some dirty old doss-house. “

Kitty slept well that night. She had come to terms with the idea of marrying Jack, and had seen Georgie blossom since learning the debt was to be paid though Kitty made certain she didn’t know Jack’s terms for being so ‘generous’. Georgie would likely refuse his help.

Kitty had no intention of letting that happen.

Georgie wanted a great deal of waking.

“Leave me be,” she groaned when Kitty shook her awake.

“It’s been ages since I’ve slept in such a comfortable bed.”

“Sorry, kid,” Kitty chuckled, stripping the clothes off her.

“We’ve a lot to do this morning. You can have a lie-in tomorrow.”

Sliding out of bed, Georgie moaned and complained. She grumbled while she washed and dressed, and all the way down to the dining room. She pulled a miserable face all through breakfast, and was still complaining when they came out into the street. By the time they boarded the bus for the first address, she was in a better mood.

“Sorry, but I’m a miserable old cow first thing in the morning,” she told Kitty.

“Yes, I had noticed,” Kitty replied with a sideways grin. In fact, she remembered Georgie’s impossible moods from their days in the children’s home. Somehow they only made her love her all the more.

The first address was a basement flat on Viaduct Street. It was down a set of narrow dark stairs and the windows were so filthy the daylight couldn’t get through.

“It’s like a bleedin’ prison!” declared Georgie.

Kitty gave the land lord a ticking off for his misleading advert and they set off once more; this time to Maudsley Street, where the advert described: ‘a very desirable second-floor flat, with all mod cons and a wonderful river view. “

As it turned out, the ‘mod cons’ was a bathroom shared by all six residents in the house. The ‘river view’ was a glimpse of the Mersey in the far distance, and a closer one of a dirty little brook that ran into the back yard and which, according to the woman in the ground-floor flat, “Brings the rats into the yard with every downpour.”

“Jesus Christ! At this rate I’d rather sleep on a bench in the park,” Georgie said. Kitty told her to be patient and marched her off to the bus stop where they quickly boarded a number 10 and headed for the next viewing in Market Square.

“It’s probably a space under one of the fruit barrers,” Georgie said, disgruntled. But Kitty could see the funny side of it all. When she smiled at the comment, Georgie smiled back, and soon they were giggling. It was so good to feel close again, to share each other’s up and downs.

By the time they got off the bus at Market Square, the sun was bright and strong in a surprisingly blue sky.

“Good job it ain’t pissing down!” Georgie muttered.

“Flat hunting’s a bugger when it’s pissing down.” A slim attractive woman going into the news agent gave the two of them a look of disgust.

“Such language!” she hissed, glaring at Georgie in particular.

Kitty quietly reprimanded Georgie.

“Behave yourself,” she warned.

“This might be the place we’re looking for, and that woman could well turn out to be one of your neighbours. It would be a pity if you started off on the wrong foot.”

Georgie was suitably humble.

“You’re right,” she admitted. The mouth all us was bigger than me brain. “

Checking the address, Kitty realised it was the very news agent that the woman had gone into.

“Let’s hope she isn’t the landlady,” she remarked, leading Georgie into the shop.

Thankfully, as they went in the woman came out, giving Georgie the same shrivelling look.

“Miserable old cow!” Georgie muttered, giving a little cry when she got a good hard dig in the ribs from Kitty.

The owner of the shop was a little man with a warm homely smile.

“What can I do for you?” he enquired, pushing his rimless spectacles back on to his fat little nose.

“You’re new to these parts, aren’t you? I know everybody who comes in this shop, but I’ve never clapped eyes on you two before. Come to live round ‘ere, have you?”

Kitty handed him the cutting.

“My friend here is looking for a place to live. We’ve come to see the flat you’ve advertised.”

He peered over his spectacles at Georgie.

“You’re expecting, aren’t you?”

“Well, ain’t you the nosy bugger.” Her grin widened.

“I won’t give you no trouble, matey, and neither will the young ‘un if I’m living here when it arrives.”

His smile showed he had taken a liking to her. He looked at Kitty, and thought they seemed a decent pair of young women, though he had a sneaking suspicion that Georgie was likely to be trouble.

“Were you the one who was swearing just now?” he asked her.

“Mrs. Jolly came in here in a right state … she said there was a young woman outside with a tongue like a sewer rat’s.”

Georgie liked him, and she said so.

“And I’ve a feeling I’d like to live on this street. I think the two of us could get on all right, but I’d be a liar if I said a wrong word never passed my lips. You see, I’ve been a rough ‘un, and I’ve run with rough ‘uns. I’m no angel and never could be;

Kitty was proud of her.

“She’s all right,” she told the shopkeeper, ‘and don’t let her tell you any different. “

He looked from one to the other until his gaze rested on Kitty for a full minute.

“I reckon you’re both all right,” he said, smiling.

Reaching beneath the counter, he handed the key to Kitty.

“Through there.” He pointed to a side door.

“You’ll see the stairs leading up to the living quarters. Since the missus brought her mother to live with us, we’ve outgrown the space up there. I’ve bought a house two doors down from here and to tell you the truth, I did want a man to take on the flat… security and all that.” He gave Georgie another long scrutinising look.

“But I reckon a woman as swears like you do, would be just as good as any man in an emergency.” He laughed out loud when Georgie promised if anyone tried to break into his shop, she’d have the whole street out in minutes.

“Why, it’s lovely!” Kitty was amazed.

The shop was poky and dingy. But up here it was spacious and light. At the front where the living room was, the sun poured in through two long windows, each dressed with the prettiest floral curtains. The kitchen was surprisingly large, with a breakfast area at one end and a range of new pine units fitted round three walls; there was a round pine table with four ladder-back chairs and a wide shallow window that stretched almost the whole length of one wall.

“I could live here all right; Georgie exclaimed, running from room to room.