Limits of Destiny (Volume 1) (17 page)

“Please.” His eyes were full of fear and pain. He tried to touch me, but I took a step back so he wouldn’t.

“Don’t.” I looked at him, mad as hell. Mad at myself, mad at him, mad at everything.

I grabbed my head with both hands. “Lily warned me about you, and what did I do…? We’re like fire and ice, Alexander. I’m looking for a serious relationship and you’re avoiding it.”

“Not this time, baby. I want us to try—regardless of how different we are. I believe we’re a good match.”

“Ha… A good match,” I bitterly repeated. “And you want me to come with you to the ball and meet these sick people? Your parents don’t know about your ‘hobby’ I take it?” I asked ironically.

He frowned. “No, of course not. And it isn’t a hobby.”

“But how can I be sure you won’t want to go there again? When you get tired of me… What will happen with me then?”

“That won’t happen,” he replied with certainty.

“It won’t happen? How can you be so sure?” I couldn’t comprehend.

“I won’t leave you, and I won’t let you leave me,” he replied in a clear, firm voice.

“You can’t stop me.”

“Don’t talk nonsense. Of course I can. You have feelings for me. Do you really think I’ve not realized this?” His eyes burned through me like a laser.

“God help me, I have to go,” I whispered. Quickly, I walked over to the wardrobe to pack my suitcase before I changed my mind.

“Alexia, stop this now! Do you hear me?” His commanding voice startled me. I turned to face him.

And he has the audacity to order me about…

“Please, you can’t go. For God’s sake, don’t ruin what we have together.” Alexander took two steps and was next me. He held me so tight to him that I couldn’t move, let alone wriggle from his grasp.

“Me ruin this? I don’t go around fucking random… I’m going mad… I revealed so much about my life to you, told you things only my father knows. Why, goddammit?” I hated myself for my weakness, for staying instead of doing the sensible thing and leaving.

I tried to escape his embrace while I still had my resolve. It was impossible. I knew his touch would make me even weaker. My body always responded to the proximity of his, seeking its warmth, his caresses… And right now, I had to think clearly and resist the temptation. I felt like I was in whirlpool that dragged me deeper and deeper within. I tried to escape, but it was impossible. I was powerless. A part of me wanted to get away, to escape, but another just wanted Alexander, at any cost.

Can I even be with a man like him?

“Alexia, listen to what I’m saying and calm down.” His voice was clear and quiet. He was making sure to speak calmly even though I knew he was seething with anger on the inside. “I understand you’re shocked, but try to understand me too. I’m not proud of what I’ve done, but it’s all in the past. It’s already happened. I can’t undo it. I am, however, certain of one thing, which is I want to be with YOU and no one else. I know you want to be with me too. You can’t hide it.”

He stared with his lovely eyes into mine, which made me feel even more vulnerable. My legs gave way. I made fists with my hands, trying to suppress my huge desire to hug him and dig my hands into his hair.

“Give me a chance to prove to you that things between us will work. Please, baby, don’t shut me out. You’ve awakened feelings in me I hadn’t even thought I could experience.”

It was such a relief to hear those words. I felt the tingle of satisfaction through my entire body.

You’ve awakened feelings in me that I hadn’t even thought I could experience.

His beautiful blue eyes pierced me, his lips touched mine, and I responded to his tender kisses. I gave myself to him in the vain hope that I would manage to keep him only to myself.

I
heard Alexander’s
muffled voice and rubbed my sleep-filled eyes to rouse myself. He was talking on the phone, looking so elegant and, at the same time, super sexy in his dark-brown suit—like a model who’d just jumped off the cover of some magazine.

“Excuse me for a second,” he said and put his hand over the receiver. Then he looked at me with his shining warm eyes, came over, leaned in, and kissed me. “Good morning, baby. You’ve gotta get up. You’ll be late for work.”

I stretched, still drowsy. While I was snoozing in bed, he’d gotten dressed and was now ready to conquer the world. I looked at my watch. It was quarter past seven.

“Why didn’t you wake me earlier?” I asked quietly. Quickly I got up and walked over to the bathroom. I had slight pangs in my belly and felt drained. My period had come, and I had started taking the pill.

Yesterday, we came back from Como to Küssnacht late at night and immediately went to bed. I fell asleep like a baby in Alexander’s arms, happy that we were together.

His bedroom was huge and very comfortable, with walls covered in soft white leather. By my standards, it was fit for a king. While having a lie-in, you could enjoy the view of Lake Zurich through the panoramic windows. It was literally breathtaking. A picture featuring a man and a woman in an embrace hung on the wall above the bed.

The bathroom had a great design. It had pearl-white tiles with golden fibers running through them. The Jacuzzi was large enough to fit five people; the same went for the shower cubicle. Towels of various sizes were carefully arranged in the glossy white cupboards.

I had a quick shower and moved on to doing my makeup and hair. When I finished, I went into the walk-in closet, which was actually a massive room with clothes arranged in the style of a luxury store. Alexander had too many suits, shirts, jeans, and casual tops to even try counting them.

Mrs. Schmidt had also hung the outfits Alexander had bought for me. They were incredibly beautiful and elegant, all of luxury designer labels: Gucci, Chanel, Prada, Dolce & Gabbana, Roberto Cavalli, etc. My eyes stopped at a Cavalli dress in dark yellow, its ends decorated with small black leaves. Checking myself out in the mirror I was impressed. I looked so sophisticated I could pass for the First Lady.

I went down to the kitchen and found Mrs. Schmidt filling the coffee machine with beans. “Good morning, Mrs. Schmidt.”

“Good morning, Miss Welson.”

Alexander was reading something on his laptop, but on seeing me, he said, “Alexia, you look dazzling.”

“Well, anyone would look dazzling in such a wonderful dress.” I sat next to him at the dining table.

“Not anyone, baby,” he said, flashed me a smile, and kissed me on the cheek.

“Thank you. Everything you’ve bought me is so nice and terribly expensive. I don’t want to think about how much money you’ve spent.”

He took my hand and gently kissed my fingers. “The money is mine. I’ll spend it how I see fit. You’ll have a coffee, right? What do you want for breakfast?”

“Muesli with milk,” I replied and stood up to get it, but Alexander pulled me by the elbow to sit back down.

“Your coffee is coming right away, Miss Welson,” Mrs. Schmidt informed me.

“And what now… I have to sit here like some baroness. I’m not used to being waited on,” I whispered in his ear, which made him laugh.

God, his laugh was so happy and infectious it made me laugh too. “I’m glad you find me funny,” I said quietly.

“I like that you have a sense of humor, Madam Baroness.”

“Stop it.” I nudged his shoulder.

Mrs. Schmidt served my breakfast on the table and walked away. I noticed she was wearing a faint smile. Clearly, she was having fun watching us.

“Babe, get used to my lifestyle and let me take care of you as I think you deserve. Don’t you get it? You are now MINE, and I love taking care of what’s mine,” he proclaimed, emphasizing the word mine, then took hold of my chin and kissed me passionately.

I moaned. Just one kiss from him was enough to make me wet. This man definitely acted like an aphrodisiac on me. “You’re turning me on. At this rate, we’ll be late for work.”

“Mmm… I’m also getting turned on. I can’t get enough of you. You’re so sweet.” He reluctantly detached his lips from mine.

Perhaps he was starting to have stronger feelings for me? No, I shouldn’t delude myself. Otherwise, I’d be severely hurt in the end.

Both of us needed some time to get to know each other better, starting with the routine things in our lives. Who knew? It might turn out that Alexander was right and we really were a good match.

“Do you always have an omelet or pancakes for breakfast?” I asked.

“Yeah, though I sometimes add a croissant or bread rolls with butter, cheese, or salami. Why do you ask?”

“Just curious.” I shrugged. “I guess you don’t feel full from muesli and cornflakes,” I said and took a sip of my coffee.

“That’s right. I feel hungry after an hour if I have them.”

“I understand.” I looked at my Rado watch, a present from my father for my graduation. “When do we have to leave?”

“We still have half an hour, so have a leisurely breakfast and don’t stress,” said Alexander before kissing me on the temple.

I started eating the breakfast, thinking about all the women he’d been with. They were probably far too many for me. I scowled at the thought.

“What awful things are floating around your beautiful head?” he asked and closed his laptop.

“Nothing important.”

“Tell me,” he insisted.

I didn’t dare look at him. I didn’t want him to think of me as obsessively jealous. After all, it was all in the past.

A past that is tormenting my stupid brain…

“Alexia,” he said quietly but in a commanding tone.

I looked up at him and our eyes met. I didn’t want him to find out how stupid I felt.

“Tell me,” he repeated. “I don’t want you to keep any secrets from me.”

“I don’t have any secrets.”

“Don’t give me that bullshit. I want to know everything you’re thinking of.”

I took a slow sip of coffee to pluck up the courage. “I was just thinking of all those women you’ve—”

“You’re the only one who’s slept in my bed, the only one with whom I spend my free time in the house.
The only one
. Do you understand?”

I nodded. His long fingers slid across my face. “I don’t want you to torture yourself with these silly thoughts. You mean so much more to me than the other women I’ve been with.”

I closed my eyes to better savor his caress. When he wanted to, Alexander could be so very tender. And God, he was very good at making me feel better. He always knew what I needed, what I would like.

*     *     *

I met up
with Lily at noon and we went to my favorite Italian restaurant, Toscana, where we ordered a calzone and a bottle of sparkling mineral water.

I liked spending my free time with her. Lily had a tonic effect on me. This girl was always full of optimism, rarely complained, and was even more rarely in a bad mood. She liked to laugh and joke and could make me smile even when I was in tears. Unlike me, she wasn’t very emotional. Lily didn’t think too much about life and acted too impulsively. She made decisions quickly and sometimes that was to her benefit, but other times, it harmed her. At least she didn’t torture herself, pondering the meaning of life in depth. Perhaps this was the reason her life had been so much easier than mine.

“So tell me, Lily. How was your time with Marco?

“Ah…” She sighed. “Very nice. He’s an amazing lover.” Her words made both of us giggle.

I knew full well where her strong attraction to Italians came from. Lily’s father was from Florence and her mother was a Swiss from the German-speaking part. For this reason, Italian men made a great impression on her, or at least this was how I saw it. As people say, men subconsciously choose women who somehow resemble their mothers and women choose men similar to their fathers.

In appearance and due to his thoughtfulness, Alexander was also very much like my own father. “So tell me. Are you with Marco just for the sex?”

“Not just.” She carefully considered my words. “He’s very sweet, has a good sense of humor. I just don’t know how long we can make a go of it apart.”

“You’re not thinking of leaving work, are you?”

“No. I don’t know what’s going to happen. Marco doesn’t speak German; his English isn’t that great either. The only good thing is he works in IT, where they’re always looking for specialists. He might have a chance in some Italian company,” she said thoughtfully while slicing off another piece of calzone. “I don’t want to think about this right now. It’s too early in the day. How was your weekend?”

“Good.” I looked at her with a smug grin. “Very good, in fact.”

“Hmm… Just very good… Did Alexander manage to prove himself in bed?”

I couldn’t stop the silly grin from appearing on my face.

“You don’t say.”

I took a napkin from the table and waved it like a fan, as if to cool my passion. I leaned toward her and continued softly, so nobody from the neighboring table would overhear me. “I’ve never had such incredible sex,
never
before in my life.”

“I knew it. He’s a proper Romeo. You just have to look at him; he oozes sex appeal. So his reputation as a great lover isn’t false.”

“Please don’t remind me of his reputation. It makes me sick to my stomach just thinking about how many women he’s been with.” I interrupted her and decided to change the subject. “I met a friend of his, Francesco. They studied architecture together in college and graduated at the same time. He currently works at Kraftberg International. You just have to let me introduce you to him. He seemed to me like a decent and serious man.”

“I won’t say no to that.” She winked at me.

I took a sip of water and continued. “On Saturday, I’m going to a charity ball with Alexander. It’s organized by his mother.”

“Well, this is news… You must be worried sick. Photographers from the press will be there, which is why your dress, hair, and makeup just have to be stunning.”

“I know. Francesco’s sister works in the Chanel store, and he told me they have amazing evening outfits. Alexander and I are going there today to pick out something.”

“That’s the spirit. You’ll blow their minds. Do you want me to make you an appointment with my hair stylist?”