Lightning In My Wake (The Lightning Series) (19 page)

Theo was crawling into himself. He was growing more and more serious by the day. I had to do what I could to draw him out of it.

I sauntered over to him and touched the bag still clasped in his hand, “You brought me breakfast?”

That snapped him out of it. He dropped the bag and grabbed my face with a fury. Breakfast had been long forgotten as his lips crashed against mine. As soon as I got over the unexpectedness of the kiss, I matched his passion with my own. We slowly backed up until the back of my head hit the wall
with a thump. His lips were rough and needy and carried a warmth I craved like air. With an animalistic aggression, he pulled my waist toward his until there was no space between us. He consumed me. No coherent thoughts could be conjured in that moment. This was no ordinary kiss—this was Theo coming back down from the heavens. This was what Pema had spoken of and if this was the way to bring him back down from the clouds, then I was happy to oblige.

He broke free once to tell me he loved me, but I had no chance to respond before he attacked
me again. This time was slower, like he’d gotten the rage out of his system and could take the time now to savor us. Needing to be even closer, I locked my left leg around his hips. I thought it would fuel him on, but instead, it seemed to cool him down. He left my lips, opting to place pecks instead on my face and temple.

“We aren’t even bonded,” he huffed out, breathless.

I giggled and attempted to pull him back to me, “That never stopped you before.”

Theo phantomed more nibbles down my neck, “We aren’t teenagers fooling around in the back of my car anymore, Colby.”

“Mmmm, that was fun.”

“Marry me,” he breathed against my mouth.

He always picked the most inopportune times to talk about such things. Now was one of those times.

“Let’s make a deal. Let’s get through all of this and then talk about the future.”

“But there is no future without you.”

“Theo, I love you, but let’s focus.”

“You love me? Just like that?”

He was goading me. “Yes, just like that, now let’s go.”

Relief flooded my system as I realized that all this Pema business had stammered our conversation about the happenings at the Synod. In all honestly, I didn’t want to tell him. I didn’t want to relive it all.

Mostly, if Regina was correct, then Theo would have to leave me to fulfill his purpose.

And I couldn’t take that.

He picked up the bag from the bakery and dragged me with him to the other room. Pema stood facing the window while Collin was sitting on the edge of the bed, face buried in his hands. We hadn’t been gone more than ten minutes, so I couldn’t fathom what had happened to make Collin look so devastated.

“What’s going on,” Theo asked.

“They’re gone,” Pema whispered. Her shoulders slumped.

Looking around the room, I realized they were right. All the books were gone. The possibilities of who and when filtered through my thoughts. I was with the Synod the day before and Theo needed the texts. Pema certainly wouldn’t lead someone to steal them after coming down on me so hard about taking them in the first place.

The only
possibility left was one I didn’t want to face. From the first moment I’d met him, Collin had seemed like the one person we could trust.

“I don’t know. I was only out of the room this morning. It would have to be someone who was monitoring every single thing we did. They would have to know when I left… Wait, you don’t think…”

This time Theo responded, “We are just thinking out loud here, Collin. No one is being accused.”

Pema swiftly turned around and countered Theo, “Who else could it be?”

“Collin?” I inquired again. It was like I continued to call his name, hoping he would jump at the chance to defend himself. He lifted his head slowly, taking the chance to deliberate a decision.
A lone tear came down my face and I swiped it away in an instant, not wanting to show any sign of weakness, especially in front of Sinead.

“Do you want me to leave, Eidolon?” His inquiry sounded more like asking to be
granted permission to stay. I knew that unless all the evidence left nothing to chance, that Theo wouldn’t make him go.

“No, Collin. I don’t believe you had anything to do with this,” his words spoke but his voice told me he wasn’t quite sure.

“You have spies in your ranks, Eidolon,” she sneered the word. Pema was awfully pushy.

Odd didn’t even begin to describe how obtuse it was to hear Theo referred to with a title. She might as well have called him Your Highness.
I hated to admit it, but it put me in my place. Regina had been right—as much as I hated it. All the time the Synod had called me in, I really had built myself up, thinking that I was something special. In my own words, I’d thought I was the shit. But it was him. And not only was that okay with me, it was a relief not to be held up to any standard.

Suddenly, I felt two inches tall next to him.

“I am aware,” he quipped back. He didn’t even flinch at being called Eidolon anymore. Somehow, in three days’ time, he’d absorbed it and let it mesh with who he already was.

Theodore Ramsey was amazing.

It hit me, shot down through my body like electricity shoots from the sky and splits open a tree. I loved him. I’d known that for years and maybe I was always been meant to love him, even before I was born. I’d taken it all for granted—taken him for granted.

“Maybe we should take the day to rest.” I suggested. This was me saving Theo from himself and everyone else who wanted a piece of him. “Let’s go visit your parents and reconvene tomorrow. I’m sure they’re worried. They are on vacation in France now. It’s close.”

At first he shot me a quizzical look, but soon got my drift. His parents hated France. His dad said it was too frou-frou. They would never vacation in France in a million years. This was me testing the proverbial spy filled waters. He took my hand, squeezing it in reassurance, “I think that’s the best idea I’ve heard in days.”

Pema flashed out of the room before we could discuss it further.

“Collin, you are welcome to come with us.”

He looked at Theo with such reverence and awe, “I would actually love to see the country. And I think your mate-to-be would like to have you to herself. Why don’t you just let me know where you are tomorrow—if you still want me to join you on this journey.”

“Of course we do, Collin. Let’s go, Colby.”

As soon as we got into the room, we packed up our things wordlessly. Theo grabbed my hands, “Wanna flash together?”

I giggled uncontrollably at that. Theo could make something so simple sound so intimate.

“Yes.” A tear
came to fruition in the corner of my eye at the thought. If we’d only had the information we did now, my father would still be alive. How many had been lost in the fray because   those who had the facts hid them from the rest of us?

He raised one of his large hands to cup the side of my face and used the pad of his thumb to wipe away the tear that had broken free. “What is it? Is this too much?”

“No, I just wish we’d known about travelling together when my dad was around,”

“Ah, Colby, your dad would’ve loved to travel with your mom. I wish we’d known.
Hell, I wish we’d known when we were kids. There was nothing I wished for more than to travel with you. We could’ve pretended to be Vikings together instead of me waiting to hear the stories from you. Let’s go. I know Mom wants to sniff me and make sure I’m not getting too skinny.”

“Ready,” I took his hold again.

“I’ve been ready all my life.”

“No, Mrs. Ramsey, please. I will burst if I eat ice cream.”

Theo chimed in, “I thought it was all mind over matter.”

“Not wanting ice cream has nothing to do with traveling, it has to do with my stomach being on the verge of bursting.”

Everyone around the table laughed at my expense. The only ammunition I had were the cookies on the plate in front of me. I reached out to get one and Theo grinned, thinking he’d won the game.

Until I chucked the cookie at his smug ass.

“Hey!” he tossed it back, hitting me directly in the mouth.

“Ouch, damn it, Theo!”

He was up and hovering over me before I could blink, “Querida, I’m sorry.” He was examining me left and right, placing first aid, in the form of kisses, all over my mouth. I laughed at his attentions to a cookie chucking accident. His eyes were so trusting, so concerned over the littlest things. He’d always been that attentive. But I loved how it continued to shock me over and over again how deeply in love I was with him.

“You two finally gave in?” His father’s voice broke us out of our world and back into reality.

Theo blinked and recoiled from our coupling, grinning like a stockbroker who’d just swindled a poor man out of his life savings. “Not you two, just her. She’s had my heart all along.”

I rolled my eyes. He was back. The guy who so gallantly vowed his devotion to me for all to know.

“Our family is back whole again. We weren’t quite complete without you, Colby.” I blushed under Theo’s father’s acceptance. But his mother didn’t seem to feel the same. She met my eyes, “I’m sorry, Colby, it’s not you. I just wish Torrent was here. He would’ve been so happy to see you two back together again.”

Theo’s father comforted his wife across the table with his hand on hers, “I’m sorry dear, I shouldn’t have said such a thing.”

“No, it’s fine. I just wish we could talk about him more. When we don’t, I feel like I’m the only one who remembers him.”

A text came through on my phone, and I excused myself from the table. Theo and his father both were now comforting Hazel and it felt wrong for me to just sit there and be their audience. It felt like intrusion.

The text was from the Synod—again. What could they possibly have to tell me that they didn’t already tell me before?

And for the first time in
my life, I ignored the summons.

“Hey, you didn’t have to leave. She’s okay.”

I tucked my phone back in my pocket, “I thought maybe the three of you needed a moment.”

“We did.” His eyebrows pulsed, “Thank you. That was thoughtful.”

“You’ve got a little,” I dabbled at the side of my mouth, “shock all over your face.”

“I’m not shocked. What would I be shocked at? That you were thoughtful? Okay, maybe a little.”

I laughed, “Yeah, it’s this new thing I’m trying out. It’s called manners.”

He sat down on the couch beside me and pulled me onto his lap. “You know, I’ve heard of manners.”

“I’m pretty sure you wrote the book, Eidolon.”

One of my eyebrows cocked as I called him that title for the first time. I wanted to try it out—see how it felt and how he felt about it. In all honesty, I expected his trademark smug attitude about it. Instead, his whole demeanor changed. A despair—almost a loneliness washed over his features and drew his mouth downward.

“It was so weird being called that today. But it’s time I got used to it. If the Eidolon were anyone else and he showed up in front of me, I wouldn’t hesitate to call him by anything but that name. I didn’t ask for this. Either way, I have to learn to accept it.” He turned me to face him and tipped my chin up with his forefinger. “But you, meu amada, I only want you to call me by my name please. If everyone begins to look at me differently—I need you to look at me like you are right now.”

My fingers threaded through his hair. It needed to be cut. He’d obviously had other things on his mind the past few weeks. “How?”

“How do you look at me?”

“Yes. I don’t know. I mean, I know how I mean to look at you, but I…”

He chuckled and the motion rocked us both. I took the moment, while he did that thing where he overthought every single word, to really amend the way I looked at him. The memories of he and I flooded my mind. Theo and Colby before there was talk of Eidolon or flashing. Theo and Colby before the world and its demands got in the way.

“Tell me what that is. Tell me what you are thinking about right this second.”

“Me and you. It’s always been me and you. No matter how stubborn I am, no matter how hard I fight you. Even when I push you as far away as I can and when it’s not far enough, I cross the planet to get away from you. No matter what, it will always be me and you.”

He brought his face as close to mine as he could. Chocolate chip cookies laced his breath and what girl in her right mind doesn’t want to be kissed by a boy who tastes like chocolate.
His eyes danced around my face before landing on my lips. It wasn’t his eyes I wanted on my mouth. His eyes and mouth rose simultaneously in a smile, “Took you long enough.”

And then he got smacked in the arm.

“Will you make me a promise,” He sobered.

“Of course.”

“If things get weird or too much to handle for you. Can you remember me like this?”