Life Penalty (32 page)

“What the hell,” Gail joked. “It’s only for two years.”

There was a moment’s silence while the two sisters exchanged warm glances.

“You seem much better,” Carol told her.

“Do I?” Gail asked, disconcerted by the thought, not sure why.

At midnight they raised their glasses, toasting in the new year. Gail abruptly put down her glass and stood up before Jack had the chance to kiss her.

“What’s the matter?” Jack asked.

“I think we should go.”

“Go?” Carol exclaimed. “It’s early. Are you all right?”

“I want to go,” Gail repeated, offering no further explanation.

“She’s tired,” Jack said for her. “We’ll go back to the hotel, get some sleep.”

“I don’t want to go back to the hotel,” Gail said adamantly. “I want to go home. To Livingston.”

“Tonight? Gail, we can leave first thing in the morning.”

“This
is
first thing in the morning,” she reminded him.

“‘But what happened?” Carol asked, confused. Her new friend, Steve, sat silently on the couch, watching the proceedings with a combination of interest and embarrassment. “A minute ago we were all laughing and having a good time.”

“That’s precisely the point,” Gail cried, turning in an anguished circle around the room. “I have no right to enjoy myself, to have a good time. Can’t you understand? To forget, to have a good time, to suddenly start enjoying life again, even in a small way, is a betrayal of Cindy! How can I allow myself to find pleasure in anything when my six-year-old daughter has been murdered? How?”

The question hung unanswered and unanswerable in the room as Jack helped Gail on with her new fur coat. It lingered in the air between them on the long, silent ride back home.

Less than an hour later, they pulled into their driveway at 1042 Tarlton Drive.

“Isn’t that Eddie’s car?” Gail asked, referring to the blue Trans Am that was parked out front.

“Maybe Jennifer had to come back for her things,” Jack offered weakly.

“Why is the house so dark?” Gail was becoming increasingly agitated.

“Take it easy, Gail,” Jack cautioned. “It might not be Eddie’s car.”

“It’s Eddie’s car,” Gail said with certainty. “And I want to know what it’s doing here.”

Gail was out of the car before Jack had a chance to stop her.

“Gail, wait a minute, will you? Don’t do anything you’ll regret. Stay calm. Jesus, will you wait for me.”

But Gail was up the front walk and at the door before Jack had time to get out of the car, and before he could catch up to her, she was already inside.

They were sitting together on the couch, and at first Gail didn’t see them. Certainly, they neither saw nor heard her, so wound up were they in each other. Gail walked through the front hallway without bothering to flip on the light or close the door. She headed straight for the living room, aware of the low moans that filtered through the room like Muzak. Then she saw them.

His arms were around her and even in the darkness Gail could see her daughter’s white expanse of thigh. Jennifer’s arms were wrapped around the boy’s neck, their lips crushed against each other, their entire posture a parody of teenage passion.

Gail walked to the comer table and flipped on the light.

Immediately, they pulled apart. Jennifer’s hands shot to her skirt, which she quickly pulled down around her knees. Eddie’s hands went to his sides. Their faces looked bruised and sore.

“Mom,” Jennifer cried, jumping up, smoothing her clothes. “What are you doing home?”

“Funny, I was just about to ask you the same thing.” Gail’s eyes moved to Eddie, who was trying to hide his erection with his hands. “Happy New Year,” she said, her voice ringing with sarcasm.

“Mom, please … We weren’t doing anything.”

Jennifer started to cry.

“I saw exactly what you were doing!”

“It was my fault, Mrs. Walton,” Eddie offered. “I convinced Jennifer to leave the party early.”

“Did you convince her to lie to me?” Gail snapped.

“I didn’t lie! We
did
go to a party. I
was
going to sleep at Mark’s,” Jennifer pleaded.

“After you finished sleeping here, that is.”

“Gail, take it easy,” Jack warned from the doorway.

“We weren’t doing anything!” Jennifer cried, running to her stepfather. “We weren’t going to go too far. I swear!”

“I think you better leave, Eddie,” Gail told the hapless boy.

“No!” Jennifer protested.

“It’s okay,” Eddie said. “Your mother’s right. I’ll speak to you in the morning.” He moved toward the hallway.

“I don’t think that’s a very good idea,” Gail said pointedly. “I don’t want you speaking to my daughter tomorrow. Or the next day. Or any day, for that matter.”

“Gail …”

“Mom! What are you doing?”

Gail turned on her daughter with a vehemence that shook the room. “How could you? Have you no memory? Is April too far back for you to remember? Do I have to remind you?”

“Mom, please stop.”

“You had a little sister. You remember her?”

“Gail … stop!”

“Mrs. Walton,” Eddie interrupted, “please don’t—”

“You, shut up!” Gail snapped, turning her attention back to her daughter. “Her name was Cindy and she was six years old. She was raped and strangled by some man who put his hands on her the way you let this man put his hands all over you.”

“Mrs. Walton.”

“Who knows?” Gail continued, recalling that Eddie had never been able to provide the police with an alibi. “Maybe even the same man.” Instantly, she regretted her words. She saw the anguish in Eddie’s face, the horror in her daughter’s eyes, the defeat in Jack’s stance, and knew she had gone too far. What had she done? Of course she knew that Eddie had nothing to do with her daughter’s death. She’d known that all along. She let her eyes drop from the boy’s ghostly features to his trembling hands.

“Go home, Eddie,” she heard Jack say softly. Several seconds later she heard the front door close.

No one else in the room moved, their energy drained. They were like three lifeless statues, Gail thought, lifting her eyes to her daughter.

“You hate me,” Gail said, sickened by her outburst.

“No,” Jennifer told her. “I could never hate you.”

“I didn’t mean to say those things. They just came out. Seeing you with Eddie that way … I lost control.”

“I know. I understand.”

Gail searched her daughter’s eyes eagerly. “Do you? Do you really?”

Jennifer nodded silently. “I’d like to go to bed now, if that’s all right with you.”

“Of course.”

“I’ll call Dad from upstairs and tell him I won’t be over.”

Gail nodded. “I love you,” she whispered, but Jennifer had already left the room.

J
ennifer didn’t come downstairs the next morning until almost noon. Gail wasn’t surprised; she knew that Jennifer hadn’t slept much; if at all. Neither had she or Jack.

Several times during the night, Gail had heard Jennifer going to the bathroom, getting a drink of water, pacing back and forth. Gail had debated going to her to try to explain herself again, but she knew there was no point in that. She had overreacted, to be sure. Some simple teenage groping, she tried to tell herself, repeating the words over and over in her mind until at last, she had drifted off to sleep.

Jack had gotten out of bed early that morning, telling her that he needed to get out into the cold fresh air and clear his head. He had been greatly upset by the scene she had created, although he had said nothing, recognizing, as she did, that everything had already been said. He was still out when Gail had finished her shower and come downstairs.

She had settled herself at the kitchen table with the latest edition of the Sunday
Times
and read a story about a woman put in jail for contempt of court after refusing—because she feared for her life—to testify against the two men accused of raping her. The two men were free. Another story concerned a convicted killer, due for parole
after serving seven years of a life sentence, who had had his parole rescinded because of the vehement protest of the outraged citizens of the area. However, the state appeals court had ruled that public outcry was no reason for denying someone parole, and there was still a good chance that the killer might be set free. According to one prison official, this killer of one teenage boy, rapist of three young women, and a person who had committed close to a dozen lesser felonies, had a “less than average” potential for violence.

Gail was still reading the paper when Jennifer came into the kitchen just before noon. She immediately folded up the newspaper and rose to greet her.

“Do you want some breakfast?” she asked, noting that Jennifer had been crying. Her eyes were red and puffy, her face covered with blotches. Jennifer avoided looking directly at her mother, picking at her fingers and scratching at something on the kitchen table.

“I’m not hungry,” she said.

“Thirsty? Some orange juice?”

Jennifer closed her eyes and looked at the floor. “Okay,” she answered at last.

Gail went to the refrigerator and poured her daughter a tall glass of juice. “Did you manage to get any sleep?” Jennifer shook her head, taking the glass from her mother’s outstretched hand and lifting it to her lips, though she made no attempt to drink. “I thought maybe you were able to fall asleep this morning,” Gail continued, afraid, though she wasn’t sure why.

Jennifer shook her head. “I’ve been on the phone most of the morning.”

Gail was clearly surprised. “Oh? I didn’t hear you.”

“I was talking to Eddie.” Jennifer lowered her glass of juice to the table without having taken a sip.

“How is he?” Gail asked, genuinely concerned. “I’ll have to call him later and apologize.”

“I don’t think he’d want you to do that.”

“I think I should.”

“Please, Mom,” Jennifer begged, “don’t make things any worse than they are.”

“Okay,” Gail acquiesced. “I won’t call him if you don’t want me to. You can tell him for me how sorry I am about the things I said.”

Jennifer raised her gaze from the floor to her mother. “I won’t be speaking to him,” she said slowly, fresh tears springing to her eyes. “He says he doesn’t think we should see each other for a while.” Her voice was plaintive, disbelieving.

“Oh, sweetie, I’m so sorry—”

“Sorry?! How can you say you’re sorry?” Jennifer demanded. “It’s what you wanted, isn’t it? You wanted us to break up. You’ve been after me for months. Well, you did it, you finally did it. You got what you wanted, so don’t you dare try to tell me that you’re sorry. Because you’re not. You’re glad!”

“No, honey, I’m not. I’m really not. Please let me go over there. I’m sure if I talked to him, explained—”

“No,” Jennifer said strongly. “I don’t want you to go over there. He said he was up all night with pains in his stomach, and that he talked it over with his parents, and they think it’s for the best this way.” There was a long pause. “There’s something else.”

“What’s that?” Gail asked.

“I spoke to Dad. Right after I finished talking to Eddie.”

“And?” Gail waited for the second shoe to drop. Jennifer took a long, deep breath, then plunged in. “I want to go and live with them.” Gail felt instantly lightheaded and grabbed onto the back of the chair in front of her. “They said that if that’s what I really wanted, then that was fine with them. They have the room; they said it was okay. Julie could use some help around the house, and
I’ll be able to help out more when the baby comes.”

“What are you talking about?” Gail demanded.

“I’m going to move in with Dad and Julie,” Jennifer repeated.

“But why? Just because a boy says he doesn’t want to see you anymore …?”

“Not just because of that. Because of a lot of things, not just because of Eddie or even because of what happened last night.”

“It won’t happen again, honey, I promise.”

“Mom, you’re not listening to me. It’s not just what happened last night. Oh, that’s part of it. It’s what brought things to a head. But it was bound to happen sooner or later. If not last night then some other time. Mom, I feel like I’m in jail. I can’t breathe. I need some room to breathe.”

“I’ll give you room.”

“You can’t, Mom. You can’t.”

Gail sank down into the chair.

“When are you planning on leaving?” she asked, hearing her voice break.

“Mark should be here in a few minutes.” Gail was stunned by the speed with which everything was happening. “I’m already packed,” Jennifer explained.

“You’ve been very busy,” Gail said. “Sorry,” she apologized quickly. “I didn’t mean to be sarcastic.”

“It’s okay.” Jennifer retrieved her glass of juice from the table and downed its contents in one long gulp.

When Mark came to pick Jennifer up some twenty minutes later, Jack was waiting for him at the front door.

“Hello, Jack,” Gail heard Mark say. If he was at all uncomfortable, it didn’t register in his voice.

How ironic, Gail thought. Now Mark would be the one to have two children while she had none.

“Jennifer’s doing a last-minute check of her things,”
Jack explained as Gail walked into the room. “I’m not sure I understand what’s happening here,” he continued. “I just got home ten minutes ago. Gail said Jennifer has decided to live with you and Julie for a while.”

“It wasn’t my idea,” Mark said, more to Gail than to her husband.

“It never is,” Gail told him simply.

“I’m sure that after she’s had time to cool off, she’ll want to come back,” Mark continued, ignoring the inference.

Gail said nothing as Jennifer joined them in the living room.

“All set?” Mark asked, obviously relieved by her presence.

Jennifer nodded. Mark picked up her suitcases and quickly headed for the door.

“You can always change your mind,” Gail told her daughter quietly.

“I know.”

Gail leaned forward and hugged Jennifer tightly to her chest. “Bye, baby.”

“Goodbye, Mom.”

Minutes later, Gail and Jack stood alone, facing each other from opposite sides of the room. Jack made no attempt at conversation; he didn’t have to. Soon there will be nothing left, his eyes were saying clearly. There has to be some solution.