Life in Secrets: Vera Atkins & the Missing Agents of WWII (76 page)

I asked Judith why she liked Vera so much.

“I liked to be part of her tapestry. And I enjoyed her mystery,” she said.

I had with me a little booklet about the F Section memorial that provided a map of all the circuits. Our route along the River Cher now took us between the Ventriloquist and Wrestler circuits, and along the southern reaches of Prosper. Water meadows, blanketed with buttercups, ran down to the river's edge. Henri Déricourt had chosen several of his landing fields near the banks of the Cher and the Loire.

Valençay was chosen for the memorial in part because it was close to many early SOE operations. It also happened to be close to where Pearl Witherington (now Madame Cornioley) lived and near where, as “Pauline,” she had taken command of Wrestler. Pearl was to lay the wreath at this year's ceremony.

The Lion d'Or, in Valençay, was where Vera's “retinue,” as one observer put it, always stayed on the occasion of the memorial service. I found the hotel bar quite empty apart from a small group of elderly women—probably Vera's retinue—talking quietly around a crochet-clothed table. From another room came a high-pitched wailing that nobody appeared to notice.

The landlady told me she had no recollection of a Vera Atkins, though she knew Pauline very well. Pauline was, she said, “une des grandes ici.” And then she asked if Vera Atkins was perhaps “la dame qui a toujours pris la chambre deux” and she affected a haughty pose. Yes, she remembered Vera now. “C'etait une très belle chambre.
La
meilleure.”

The wailing became louder as an elderly woman in black moved towards me with hands outstretched, as if to speak. But just as she was about to grab my arm, she moved away, still wailing. I was evidently not who she thought I was.

I went to join Vera's retinue. They too were talking about the “travesty” of the latest controversial film about SOE, Charlotte Gray. Vera also would have considered the film a travesty, had she been here, we all agreed. The Valençay booklet, which Vera had partly written, stated: “All, men and women alike, were motivated by a loathing of Nazi ideology, a love of freedom and a desire to make an individual contribution to the liberation of France.”

Until the very end of her life Vera had found herself defending the decision to send women behind the lines. In 1996 she picked up her pen yet again to rebut criticism of the decision to send Nora Inayat Khan to France. On the back of a bank statement, in a now-faltering hand, Vera drafted a letter to the Daily Telegraph describing how Nora had evaded capture, made two escape attempts, given nothing away, and was kept in chains as an exceptionally dangerous prisoner. “This is the record of Nora Inayat Khan and her answer to those who doubted her,” Vera concluded. The letter was also her answer to those who doubted her; because every claim that the women should not have been sent was, by implication, an attack on Vera herself. After two years researching her life, there remained many unanswered questions about Vera, but of one thing I was now quite sure: an important key to her character was her overwhelming sense that she was always right.

As I talked to Vera's friends, the hotel bar began to fill with SOE veterans and families. There was a little flurry across the room as another carload arrived from England, among them the SOE adviser in a French beret and red V-neck jersey, and his assistant Valerie, SOE in France under her arm.

And then the woman in black appeared again, still wailing but apparently recognising one or two of the new arrivals. I noticed now that her face was deathly pale and her eyes bloodshot. She clutched an SOE veteran and started speaking to him very fast in French, occasionally breaking off to cry. The man patted his supplicant kindly while clearly trying to extricate himself if he possibly could.

He later explained that the woman came every year. She was still mourning her fiancé, who was killed while serving with SOE in France, but she had never been told quite how he was killed or where he died. I wondered whether the woman in black had grabbed Vera's arm and how Vera had responded.

I had not always been able to make sense of Vera's mixed responses to the survivors and the families of the dead. “Before joining, the agents had been warned that their chances of survival were estimated at about even. But in fact something like three agents in four survived,” stated the Valençay booklet. As everyone here knew, had it not been for Vera, very little would ever have been known of the fate of those who did not survive.

I had found letters from the bereaved spilling from Vera's files. To many she offered emotional and financial support until the end of her life. Latterly, for example, the case of Francine Agazarian, wife of Jack Agazar-ian, who was hanged at Flossenbürg, had taken up a great deal of Vera's time. “I am most grateful for the cheque, and deeply touched by your kindness; once again let me thank you with all my heart,” wrote Francine in 1988. On another occasion: “For many years I felt it was not right that I should be alive. I should have gone when they did and in the same manner.”

And yet precisely because I had seen such examples of Vera's sympathy and understanding, the examples of her coldness in other cases were so hard to comprehend. Vera's heartless disregard, in the immediate postwar years, for the family of Sonia Olschanesky, who were never informed that she had died at Natzweiler, was the starkest example. Often the neediest were shown the coldest face. Occasionally Vera's reserve even had the paradoxical effect of transferring a sense of blame or guilt to the other person. When, in her early twenties, Tania Szabo came to see Vera to talk about her murdered mother, she found a distant and disapproving Vera. Yet far from feeling let down by Vera, Tania left the meeting blaming herself for having “disappointed” her and hoping to make amends.

On other occasions, when Vera feared accusation, she automatically played down her personality, as if to hide herself. Vilayat Inayat Khan's wife, Mary, told me that when she met Vera at Nora's memorial service in Suresnes she was “mouselike” and “made no impression.” This must have been deliberate on Vera's part. The former F Section agent George Millar, an admirer of Vera's, once told me always to remember one thing about her: “Everything Vera did was deliberate.”

Many I spoke to detested this coldness in Vera. Some saw it as sinister. But others saw it as another facet of her inability to concede that mistakes might have been made.

Close friends felt only sympathy for Vera. Behind that controlled facade they sensed that she was all the time suppressing her own emotion and her own guilt. From time to time Vera would—just momentarily— lose that control. Nigel Smith, an amateur historian who worked with Vera on securing the SOE memorials, came to know her well in later years. On one occasion in the 1980s, when Vera was talking to him about Violette Szabo, she started to describe what Violette was wearing the day she saw her off to France. She recalled every tiny detail of Violette's clothes—her shoes, the shirt, and the dress—and she described them several times. “I think the dress was of blue and white flowers,” said Nigel. “It was as if she had never shaken the image from her head. That was the only time I saw her show emotion. She was obviously moved.”

“She was imperturbable—contrôlée,” said the former F Section agent Jean-Bernard Badaire. After surviving Neuengamme concentration camp, Badaire managed to escape from a train that was transporting him to Belsen, two days before the liberation, and miraculously he made his way to the British lines. His friendship with Vera after the war was as close as anyone's. Yet she had never once shown concern for what had happened to him in German captivity. “Jamais une question” he said with a flourish of his hands. “But just occasionally something would suddenly come out,” he added. “One day a subject came up, and she suddenly began to talk about a German she had interrogated who had murdered little children. She told me she said to this man: ‘How could you do such a thing?' And he said to her: ‘Like pictures, I hung them all along the wall.' Badaire had evidently been very struck, not so much by the German's comment but by the way Vera had repeated it all those years later. “Elle a dit ga,” he said, looking at me. “ ‘Like pictures I hung them along the wall.' I think she was haunted by that phrase. It had come out in a moment she wasn't thinking. When she wasn't in control.”

Badaire believed that Vera could not talk to him about the concentration camps precisely because she knew he had seen everything. “I think if you talk to somebody who has been in a camp and has seen all the horrors, you are wary of him, if you feel he might think it was you who sent him there. That is what Vera feared, that we might think it was her who sent us there.” He paused. “It is …” he said, and struggled for a word. “En frangais on dit ‘rancune.' You understand?” He explained. The word meant a grudge. “Particularly for the families of the girls. Vera always feared that elles ont gardé une rancune centre elle. This, perhaps, was the key to her comportment.”

Some of Vera's other closest friends had made similar observations. And Vera's niece Zenna Atkins was quite sure that her aunt's “mental wiring” meant she was able to control her emotions. “But I think when she discovered all that awful horror, it was like a series of body blows. Then she spent the rest of her life recovering from those blows.”

As we milled around waiting to take our seats for dinner, Pearl appeared, followed by a TV crew complete with cameraman and sound recordist. Channel Four had interviewed Pearl recently for a documentary on The Real Charlotte Grays. Now the BBC were filming her for a new programme about Violette Szabo.

The producers had interviewed a woman who had shared a cell with Violette and who broke down on camera as she described how Violette had been raped by a German guard. The TV investigators had also apparently discovered that Violette's famous battle, holding off her German captors with her Sten gun, was probably a fabrication. The story had formed part of Violette's citation for her George Cross.

Those early attempts to sanitise the stories of agents, as in the case of Violette, and then embellish their heroics was another manifestation of Vera's determination to be always right. It also sprang from an understandable determination on the part of Vera and Buckmaster, supported by many former F Section colleagues, that SOE should be valued and remembered. The sense of deep betrayal at the end of the war, when SOE was closed down, to be forgotten, cannot be overstated. “They all just wanted us scrubbed off the face of the earth,” one F Section staff member told me, referring to MI6, the Foreign Office, and other Whitehall antagonists.

Yet the publicity drive only diverted attention from the true heroism of several of the agents. At Ravensbrück Violette's cheerful spirit and defiance in the face of unremitting Nazi degradation was an inspiration to weaker prisoners. Whichever of the women it was who scratched the face of Peter Straub, the Natzweiler executioner, as she was pushed, drugged, into the furnace, surely deserved to be remembered for such extraordinary resistance. Letters in Vera's files suggested the woman might have been Vera Leigh, because she was once put forward for a George Cross; although inexplicably the proposal was not pursued. None of the citations for Nora Inayat Khan mentioned that her last word to those who had already beaten her to certain death was liberté.

The publicity drive had another unintended result: it fuelled conspiracy theories, which then obscured the very success stories that Vera and Buckmaster had hoped to promote.

Around the table at Valençay most people tried to find something kind to say about Buckmaster, whose last job was public relations manager for the French champagne industry. Former colleagues still remembered him as the grand old man of F Section, but ever since his death in 1992 there had been much talk of his “gullibility” and “naivety.” Some said he had arrived at SOE with a chip on his shoulder—perhaps because he had not taken his exhibition up to Oxford. Then when he unexpectedly secured the post as head of F Section, he felt a need to prove himself and secure, in the words of Colin Gubbins, “the highest possible dividend” for F Section—but zeal and patriotism, and a link to the old-boy network, were not enough. Perhaps Buckmaster sensed, as Gubbins said after the war, that he got the job “because there was nobody else.”

When things went wrong, Buckmaster, rather than face up to reality, retreated into fantasy, from which he rarely seems to have emerged. In his later years, when confronted with the facts of his gaffes, he, like others, took refuge in conspiracy theories, saying, for example, that he had known all along that Déricourt was a double agent but he had been following orders from on high. Sometimes when confronted with the facts, Buckmaster simply cried.

The question of Buckmaster, of course, always led back to the question of Vera's wartime role. How much had he really depended on her? Here, at the Lion d'Or, Vera was considered by most to have been his “number two,” and everyone considered her to have been “Buckmaster's brains.” “We saw her as la vraie patronne,” said Bob Maloubier, the tips of his white moustache curling up in affectionate memory. “Vera was the real boss.”

Yet the greater the influence ascribed to Vera within the organisation, the more questions arose about her role in the flawed decision-making. If she was the brains behind Buckmaster, why did she not warn him—or others, if he would not listen—of the errors? And why did she continue to protect him so vehemently after the war?

One answer is, of course, that Vera was not, as she insisted, always right. While cleverer than most of those around her, she was an amateur like all the rest, and in the confusion and chaos of war Vera was quite capable of being wrong. When I met her at Winchelsea in 1998, I asked when she first believed that Nora was captured. Her answer gave a small hint of the acute anxiety that had surrounded that “wrong” assessment in December 1943 that Nora was free. “The Germans captured several radio operators. There were many mutilated messages. When she was arrested in October we were suspicious. By January we felt she must be all right.”