Life After Perfect (18 page)

Probably enough to make just about any grown man cry.

Derek wasn’t wearing his lab coat, but he still had on his crisp dress shirt, and had lost the tie, opened the top buttons, and turned up the cuffs. He looked some kind of good no matter how he was dressed, and her heart made it hard to play it cool.

He parked in front of his house and led her inside. “I’ve got some pork chops we can throw on the grill if you’re hungry.”

He looked a little nervous too, and that made her feel a little less so. Thank goodness because those first few minutes her heart felt like it was pa-pow-pow-pounding. At least now it wasn’t echoing in her own ears.

“If you’re not too hungry yet, I thought I might show you around the property before we eat.”

“I’d like that.”

He held the door open and they walked outside. Out back there were at least a dozen dwarf fruit trees. “If you like baking, you ought to come get some of these apples. I drop as many as I can into buckets and take them over to the hog farmer in Level Green a couple times a week just so they don’t go to waste. Can you make an apple pie?”

“Best apple pie you’ve ever had.” She raised her hand into the leaves of the tree.

“Are you bragging?” he asked.

“Totally,” she said.

He led her down the path through the tiny orchard and then out to the clearing. He’d marked off what he hoped would be the future site of the retreat weeks ago. It was very preliminary with all he had to get done on the house first, but it kept him motivated.

She turned and looked curious, pointing to the stakes with bright yellow tape hanging from them. “What’s that?”

“That’s part of the project I wanted to tell you about. My future. Well, maybe. It’s still in the idea phase.”

“You mean in case the doctor and firefighter gigs don’t work out?”

He liked her quick wit. “No. I’ve been thinking about maybe building a retreat here one day. This would be the building site. At least I think so.”

“What kind of retreat?”

He took her hand and walked toward the markers. She hadn’t noticed the bench beneath a curved area where a half dozen river birch trees stood until now. It blended right in with the surroundings. He let her sit first and then sat down next to her. The wooden slider chair moved back and forth.

He lifted his arm up over the back of the chair. “I still want to make a difference in this world. Somehow. But after Laney, it changed how I felt about cancer and treating it. So, I’m thinking about building a retreat of sorts. Somewhere to get away and rebalance.”

“So, a retreat? For cancer patients?”

He shook his head. “No. Not for the patients. For the doctors. Creating a place where medical professionals can renew themselves and keep themselves balanced. It just might be my way of giving back.”

Her eyes widened. “I see. So treat those that heal. Keep them healthy and they can heal more people.”

“Exactly.”

“Neat. So tell me about it. How many rooms? What’s it like? Do you have a style in mind?”

“Picture casual elegance. Two stories. Plenty of privacy. Lots of windows. Sunlight is good. Lots of it.”

She watched as he described the setting. If she had to guess, he could probably describe every room. He’d given this more than just a little thought. She admired his passion—he could look past his pain to find a way to give back. How long would it take before she could look past what had happened to really see a different future?

He pointed off to where a thin stand of trees seemed to mark the entry to deeper foliage. “Hiking trails over there.”

“That sounds beautiful.”

“Honestly I don’t think it matters what it looks like. I think it will be the attitude of the place that will make it work. I want it to have a relaxing feeling to it. Simple, but comfortable.”

“How’s this different from the inn?”

He nodded. “You’re a smart lady.”

“Yeah. I know.” She could tell he had a lot more going on in that brain of his.

“Can I tell you over dinner?”

“Absolutely, but I’m not going to forget.”

“I don’t want you to.”

Derek stood, then took her hand and they walked back up to the house without much conversation. When they got to the back deck, he raised the top of the grill and pressed the button. The flame danced beneath the grates as they went inside.

He went straight over to the refrigerator and retrieved a covered plate.

“Is there something I can do?”

“I’ve got some salad. We’ll just do a salad and pork chops, if that works for you.”

“Works for me.” She followed him outside.

He put the chops on the grill and just as she walked over to sit down on one of the chairs on the deck, the sky opened up.

She raced inside, but Derek was already soaked to the bone.

He closed the lid on the grill and ran into the house for cover.

“That is the coldest rain!” He was laughing and wet. When he saw that she was laughing, he grabbed her in a hug, soaking her too.

She wiggled free from his grip. “Hey. No fair.”

He glanced outside. “Maybe we don’t need those pork chops.”

The rain came down in buckets.

“Don’t you have an umbrella?” she asked, and a roll of thunder shook the house.

“That doesn’t seem like a very good idea. You have a death wish? Because I’m pretty sure even when things get bad, I still want to live.”

“Oh, stop that. There’s no lightning.”

“Yet,” he said. “Besides it’ll be a little hard to hold an umbrella and turn the meat and hold the plate and . . . we might just be eating salad.”

“You have to have protein. A balanced diet. Aren’t you a doctor? You should know that.”

“I get paid to say that.”

They exchanged a subtle look of amusement. “Where’s the umbrella?”

“There’s one by the door.”

She got it and they stood at the door watching for lightning. “I don’t see any lightning. Do you?”

“No, and those pork chops are smoking.” He looked at her as if challenging her. “It’s now or never.”

She twisted the knob in her hand and swung the door open. She pushed the umbrella out first and opened it. The huge blue golf umbrella was big enough to cover both of them and a friend. The Duke Cancer Center logo showed more proof of the life this man had once lived, and that he hadn’t let go of it completely. She wondered if he’d ever find his way back. Maybe Naomi was right and there was something even bigger in the future for him.

“No sense risking bad luck,” she explained. “Come on,” she said as she stepped outside under the umbrella.

“I’m already wet.” He stepped outside, too, and walked alongside her.

“Get under here. You’re going to catch a cold.”

He gave her his serious doctor look. “That’s not how you catch a cold.”

“It could happen, and then it would be my fault.” Okay, so maybe that was stretching it.

He dipped his head and got under the large dome with her. “Happy now?”

“Yes.”

He leaned forward and kissed her.

The rain pounding on the umbrella was loud, and it was probably a good thing because she was pretty sure when he moved in deeper with that kiss that she’d just moaned. His mouth on hers made her want to drop the umbrella and clamor for higher ground, for air, or maybe really what she wanted was more. The assault of emotion was dizzying.

And then as quickly as he’d surprised her with that kiss, he stepped out from under the umbrella back into the pouring rain and lifted the lid of the grill to rescue the pork chops from the rising flames.

“They’re on fire!” she said, and she knew exactly what it was like because every nerve in her body felt like it had just sparked. “Break out those fireman skills. Want me to go get your cute suit?”

He gave her an exaggerated glare.

“Too much?”

“Yeah.”

He quickly moved the meat off to the side of the grill, away from the flames, and then opened the drawer below the cooking space to get a small basting mop. He swished the mop into a sauce on the top rack and worked it over the pork chops and then settled them back on the grill top.

“What is that?”

“Chef’s secret.”

“Really now?”

“Okay, it’s just butter and garlic with a little barbecue sauce mixed in.”

“Garlic butter?”

“Yeah.”

“Guess it’s a good thing you already kissed me.” And she’d liked it. A lot.

“You look disappointed.”

She opened her mouth, but nothing witty came to mind, and she wasn’t about to say what was on her mind . . . which was, “Yes, I’m disappointed.” She closed her mouth and shrugged. Seemed like the only safe response at the moment.

He dropped the top of the grill down with a loud clank and turned to face her, taking the umbrella from her hand and tossing it over the side of the deck.

“Hey—” she started.

But suddenly his mouth was on hers and she couldn’t care less that they were getting soaking wet, or if those pork chops got burned to smithereens.

Lost in the kiss, Derek didn’t seem to notice the smoke pouring from the grill, but she could see it floating up behind him. The rain sizzled against the hot metal.

He turned around and glanced at the grill. “Damn.” He fished the meat off the grill onto a plate.

She laughed. “I’m sure they’ll taste fine.”

“I wanted to impress you.”

“You did. It was those firefighting skills.” And so many other things about him that she’d needed right now. Like someone who wanted to share. Wanted to hear her opinion. Who seemed interested. She hadn’t even realized how much she’d missed that . . . until she had it again.

He ran his finger down her rain-soaked top.

She shivered at his touch.

“The temperature has dropped,” he said, looking to the sky.

“That wasn’t that kind of chill.” She barely recognized the deep, soft tone of her own voice.

“Is that okay?” he asked.

“Oh yeah. Amazing.”

“Good. I like that,” he said, dropping kisses into the nape of her neck with each word. “It’ll be even more amazing if I didn’t completely ruin our dinner. Let’s get these inside and see what we’ve got.”

Katy walked inside behind him. “I promised Naomi a doggie bag if we ate.”

“She might be going hungry.”

But the chops were fine. A little charred on one side, and Derek played it off as a way to settle their stomachs and overeat at the same time—giving her a little Medicine 101 on the benefits of charcoal for intestinal discomfort and heartburn.

She stayed away from the garlicky mushrooms.

“I’m eating those, so you better,” he said pointing to the mushrooms.

“What? You gonna withhold my dessert if I don’t eat my veggies?”

“Hey! If I have garlic breath . . . you should have it too. Unless you don’t plan on letting me kiss you again.”

She stared into his eyes, enjoying the playful banter. She lifted her fork and, without ever breaking the lock with his gaze, she stabbed a mushroom and stuck it in her mouth.

“That’s my girl.”

She licked a finger seductively.

“Yeah, and that.” He pointed at her. “That’s just not fair.”

“You’re good for my ego.”

“I don’t know why someone as beautiful as you would have any problem in that department.”

If he only knew.

That Friday afternoon when she saw Ron with that girl everything had changed. In that one moment she’d lost her sense of self. She’d felt small, and ugly, and unworthy. And then again when she watched the same girl walk right out of her very own house. It was unforgivable. She wondered how long it took the girl to realize she had graffiti on the side of her car. It didn’t matter now.

Here with Derek, she felt special and desirable.

Chapter Sixteen

He’d promised an early night and he made good on the promise. And although part of her really respected him for it, part of her wished he’d gone totally Neanderthal on her and picked her up and carried her off to his bedroom.

When she had been nestled in the crook of his arm that first night, it had been the best head prop of her life. If they sold a pillow that fit like that, she’d buy one for sure.

Derek negotiated the winding road. “Power must be out,” he said. “It’s dark, but you can usually see lights from a couple of the houses along this road at night.”

The rain had stopped, but the water sloshed beneath the tires at each curve. He slowed near the turn into the gravel lane. Little frogs hopped across the lane. So many there was no way there weren’t going to be some casualties. “Where did those all come from? It’s like a horror movie.”

“There are always a ton of frogs out here near the creek.” He pulled in front of Lonesome Pines and just as he’d predicted, the power was out. The yard lights weren’t on and there wasn’t even a hint of one of the fifty night-lights Naomi had in the sockets around the house to make getting around at night safe.

“Let me get a flashlight,” he said.

She sat tight while he got out of the truck. It was only partly because of the dark that she was almost afraid to move. In the daytime, the grounds were lovely and peaceful, but now every sound was amplified and that deluge of frog traffic had her skin crawling.

The dome light came on when he opened the door and she let out the breath she hadn’t even realized she was holding.

He opened her door and held out his hand to help her down, using a large lantern-type flashlight in his other hand to light up a wide area in front of them. He led her to the porch and helped her inside.

Naomi must have already turned in for the night, but she’d left jar candles burning in the first-floor rooms with a note. Katy trained Derek’s light on the note so she could read it. It told her where there were more candles if she needed them, and Naomi had left a flashlight out for her to help her get around. At the very bottom of the note she had scrawled, “PS—I hope you didn’t make it home to read this note tonight. Xo”

She laid her hand over the paper so Derek wouldn’t see that.

“She’s the sweetest lady,” Katy said trying to play it off lightly. “Point the light over here so I can put Naomi’s dinner in the refrigerator.”

He followed her through the space, and they both laughed as they bumped into things in the shadowy darkness. She slid the dinner into the refrigerator and closed it quickly.

“Do you think the power will be out long?”

He shrugged. “They’ll probably get it up in the morning. It just depends on how big of an outage it is.”

“At least she was prepared with all of the candles.”

Derek frowned. “She shouldn’t have left them burning unattended.”

“They’re attended now.”

“So they are.” He flashed the light toward the note again. “What’d it say?”

“The note?” She shrugged. “She’s in bed. Candles. Flashlight. That’s it.”

He turned off the flashlight, and in the soft flicker of the seven candles around the room, he pulled her into his arms and kissed her.

A rumble of thunder rolled across the sky.

“Mother Nature doesn’t seem to approve,” he said.

“Or,” she said, pulling in closer, “she doesn’t think it’s safe for you to leave.”

He raised an eyebrow.

She nodded her head.

“Where’s our room?” he asked.

She turned and crooked a finger toward him. “Follow me.”

“One second. Hold that thought.” He went around and blew out all of the candles, then caught up with Katy and let her lead him down the hall.

Feeling like a kid sneaking back in after curfew, she motioned for him to follow her.

He held the flashlight steady, lighting a path in front of her.

With each step down the hall, she became more aware of him right behind her.

They stepped inside her room and Derek turned off the flashlight.

She sucked in a deep breath, the darkness a welcome relief from the insecurities that were taunting her, but she didn’t want to resist.

He pulled her into his arms.

She ached for his touch and his moves as intense and volatile as the storm had been outside.

He laid her down on the bed and undressed her.

Part of her wished for at least the moonlight to see the outline of his form, but the darkness played on her senses like a wicked masquerade. Somehow freeing, yet dangerous at the same time.

He was awakening feelings that were foreign to her. The sound, the warmth, even the taste of him filling her with desire for even more.

The connection was more powerful than it had been the night they’d met. They’d been able to resist going too far then, but not tonight. There was no holding back now.

They lay in the darkness, breathing so heavily that even the storm seemed to have quieted.

“I could stay.” His hand ran the length of her arm.

“I’m not sure that’s a good idea.” She had explaining to do, but she couldn’t do it now. How would that look? “What would Naomi think?”

“That the bridge was closed?”

“Let’s take it slow, Derek.” They were both taking steps on shaky ground. And she didn’t need a rebound guy to make things even more confusing than they already were. Besides, he had roots here, and she’d just been uprooted.

He kissed her on the forehead and then pulled her into his arms. “I can’t wait to see you again.”

But those words tempted her like she’d never expected they would.

She walked him out to his car with the light, and reluctantly waved as he left. It might have been nice to have him stay, but it wasn’t the right time. She regretted not telling him about her situation. Maybe once she had the separation papers in hand, it would be easier to tell him. And it would be more final. Then again, the right time might never come.

She needed to stand on her own two feet right now. At least she’d earned back a little self-esteem in the process tonight.

Using the flashlight to find her way back to her room, she undressed and crawled into bed in the silent house. One didn’t really realize there was such a hum from all those electronics until it wasn’t there anymore.

Katy’s phone woke her from a dead sleep. She rushed around the room trying to find where she’d put her purse in the dark last night and finally put her hand on her ringing phone.

Shaleigh’s voice came across the line. “Have you looked at Facebook today?”

“No. Why?”

“Seems the little Prius driver has tagged you. In a video.”

“Uh-oh.”

“Yeah. No charges have been filed yet, but I guess Ron gave her his phone or sent her the video. Not your best move, Katherine.”

“It was spontaneous.”

“Like combustion. Never leave a trail. Haven’t I taught you anything?”

“Sorry.” She turned on her computer, waiting for it to boot up while she talked. “I’m kind of surprised she’d post it. Doesn’t she know that video is not flattering of her behavior?”

“I don’t think she sees it that way. But then consider the source. She was sleeping with your husband.”

Even though she knew it, hearing the words roll right off of Shaleigh’s tongue like that resulted in a painful stab.

Katy had only seen the video on her phone. At least here she could go full screen. “Hmm. Well, there are already over two hundred likes. I wonder if they like what I did, or what she did?”

“Don’t think it matters. It’s only nine in the morning. I’m sure it will become clear later on.”

“Great. Maybe I’ll repost it with hash tag slut on it.”

“Please don’t,” Shaleigh said.

“How about #RonBarcliftIsACheater?”

“Same.”

“You’re no fun.” She closed the Facebook screen. “What else is going on?”

“Just wondering if you thought any more about taking a simple little job in that town.”

“Not really. I thought about going back to work now. Ending the leave of absence, but then I’d have to rent a place to stay, and quite honestly, I’m not ready to go back to that job.”

“So don’t. Just get a little job at a restaurant or in an office or something. I’ll say you’re too distraught to go back to the pressure of your career and this is all you can do for now. Get this turned back to Ron doing you wrong.”

“I could do that. As long as it’s not with a financial institution, there won’t be a conflict.”

Shaleigh’s voice didn’t hold an ounce of amusement. “And please quit acting like a Power Ranger and taking matters into your own hands. You’re supposed to look hurt and fragile.”

“I am.”

“
Well
, act it.” Shaleigh laughed, finally. “Even your ‘hurt and fragile’ is more put-together than anyone I know. Why am I surprised?”

“Sorry. It’s just the way I operate. Plan what you’re going to do, and do what you plan.”

“I’ll send you the t-shirt. Just lay low for a little while. Deal?”

“Deal.”

Katy hung up the phone and turned on the light. The electricity had come back on sometime during the night. It was probably time to get that cashier’s check cashed so she’d have some money. Without Ron pushing his agenda on her, she could open an account at one of the big banks with lots of branches.

She got dressed. Naomi must have gone somewhere because she wasn’t anywhere to be seen. Kelly Jo’s door was pulled shut, too.

She went to the desk and looked in the phone book for a list of banks. A quick look in the tiny phone book showed there was a national bank right on Main Street.

She got a cup of coffee from the kitchen and then went with her coffee in one hand to her car and headed to town.

With the cashier’s check safely tucked into her purse, she went into the big fancy building. It looked out of place with its shiny, glass exterior. Inside everything was electronic. Not that old hometown feel. She waited for her turn to speak to a teller.

Finally she stepped to the counter and handed over the cashier’s check and her driver’s license.

“Are you a customer here, Mrs. Barclift?”

“No. I’m just here on vacation. I live down in Atlanta.”

“Not this branch. Our bank.”

“Oh. Well, no. Not that either. I bank with them. See there on the cashier’s check.”

The woman’s mouth took on an unpleasant twist. “I’m so sorry. We can’t cash this for you. We only cash these for our customers.”

“I need the money. Can you just put a hold on it, or charge me a fee or something?”

“I’m sorry. Maybe you can find a branch close by.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“I’m afraid not. You’d be surprised how many fraudulent cashier’s checks we run into. We really have to be careful.”

Katy snagged the check and her license back and stalked out of the bank. Great. Well, that would have been nice to know before she’d left Atlanta for the second time. She’d always thought a cashier’s check was as good as cash. When did that change?

She left feeling aggravated and madder than ever at Ron for making things so difficult. If he could have just been faithful, none of this would be happening.

Leaving her car at the curb in front of the bank, she walked down the block to the Blue Skies Cafe.

When she walked in, Angie was the first person she saw.

“Hey, girl!”

“Hi. I had some errands to run. Thought I’d drop in for some breakfast. What do you recommend?”

“Omelet. The best.”

“I’ll take it. With orange juice, please.”

“Coming right up.”

Katy checked her messages and the weather forecast on her phone.

Angie brought her juice and slid across from her in the booth.

“So you and Derek had a little date last night?”

Katy laughed. “I don’t know if I’d call it a date.”

“It was a date. He hasn’t done anything with anyone since Laney died. You’re the best thing that’s happened to him . . . in way too long.”

“Well, I could probably say the same thing. He makes me feel pretty good too.”

“Naomi stopped in earlier. She was driving to the airport to pick up Kelly Jo’s husband.”

Katy couldn’t hold back the tears. “I don’t know why I’m crying like this. I just feel so relieved. Happy. Something for her. She needs him with her through this.”