License to Shift (20 page)

T
hree days.

Three fucking days, and she still hadn't woken up.

Mark stared at Julie's still body, counting the steady rise and fall of her chest. She was breathing. Her heart was beating. And most important, this was all completely normal after a first shift. New shifters sometimes slept for a week after their first change. Three days was average. Except nothing about what had happened to her was average.

She had bonded with him, thereby saving his life and his sanity. Somehow, she'd connected them and that had bled off enough bear so that he could think. Instead of being all consuming, the grizzly in him had settled, sharing space in his brain like never before. And from that place, he'd been able to come back to human.

A miracle for him, but for her? She'd been overwhelmed. She'd shifted but not been able to maintain the form. And now she was lying unconscious in a hospital room because of what she'd done to save him.

“This is normal, Mark. Quit beating yourself up.”

Mark looked up as Carl entered the hospital room. He was looking tired, but in a good way. As if the statesmanship of being their alpha was easier somehow. Becca's doing, obviously, and Mark was happy for the man, but that didn't ease his worry about Julie.

“How are you feeling?” Carl asked.

“Fine.”

“Have you slept?”

“Sure.” There was a cushioned chair to the side, and Mark had caught some Zs when Julie's mother and sister had been with her. Right now they were picking up the professor from the cabin so he could visit as well, which gave Mark a chance to sit on the edge of her bed and hold her hand. Her still, too hot hand.

Did she have a fever?

He glanced at the monitor and saw that her temperature was 99.4, aka shifter normal. But she wasn't a shifter. Four days ago she'd been 100 percent human with a 98.6 degree body temperature. He knew because he'd touched every inch of her body. He'd slept with her tucked up beside him. And he had wrapped her against him every moment he could. He knew what her temperature was, and this was hot for her. Unless it was the new norm. Unless she had been permanently changed in an amazing way.

But he didn't dare hope for that. Not the way his luck usually ran.

“Come on, Jules. Wake up,” he said as he squeezed her fingers.

Nothing.

Meanwhile, Carl refused to be ignored. He came around the bed to look steadily at Mark. “You're sure you feel okay?”

Mark glared at the Max, but didn't comment beyond that. He'd already answered these questions. He was better than ever before. The reasons were complicated. First off, his time with his grizzly asleep had given him a new appreciation of exactly what his bear did for him. The creature gave the human focus and a grounding he'd never appreciated before. Second, the grizzly had his mate now, if she ever woke up. The bond between him and Julie was set in granite. Whether that was chemical or magic or simple luck, he didn't know, but it steadied him in ways he couldn't even express. He'd thought they were connected before, but this was deeper, more permanent and way more profound than he'd ever imagined was possible.

The two of them were joined at the soul. But that didn't make a damn bit of difference if Julie never woke up. He'd been ready to give up his life to save hers. The fact that it might have worked out the other way was killing him.

“She's my mate. I can't live without her.”

Carl blew out a breath. Fortunately, he knew better than to argue. Grizzlies mated for life, and when one died, there was a fifty-fifty chance the other would go as well. Mark already knew which side of that equation he would go on merely because the thought of life without her was squeezing his chest to the point that he couldn't breathe.

“One step at a time,” Carl said.

Mark didn't speak. He just watched Julie's chest and measured the steady rise and fall, aching for a change. A hitch. A deeper movement. Something that would indicate that she was coming back to him.

“Evil Einstein is talking,” Carl said. “He's cut a deal with the DA in return for explanations about his research. His real name is Morris Holland and he's a grade-A nutjob from the Upper Peninsula. Parents were cross-species shifters. A wolf and a bear. God knows how that happened and nobody noticed, but he's apparently dedicated his life to activating his shifter DNA.”

Mark shook his head. It was a well-known fact that cross-species parents produced non-shifting children. The idea that this Morris had somehow managed to activate latent DNA was both a miracle and a tragedy of psychotic proportions. Just what did he think would happen if he took his own drug? He'd become some bizarre mix of wolf and bear that would look like…

Oh, hell.

“The freaks who attacked Julie's cabin.”

Carl nodded. “They were all of mixed heritage that had been activated.”

“So shoot him up with his own shit and let him study what it feels like. And don't kill him until he's too weak to scream anymore.”

“I've considered it.”

Mark nodded. Fucker ought to die in his own science experiment. But logic told him that if something went south with Julie, they'd need Evil Einstein alive and competent. “How's Alan?”

Carl's voice was even as he spoke, but Mark understood the bite of tension beneath the words. “His fever's down. Vitals are stabilized. He's been in and out of consciousness, but the docs are keeping him quiet. His bear DNA has been switched on somehow, but it's beating the shit out of his body.”

“So…better?”

Carl nodded, stark relief on his face. “Yeah. Better. And getting stronger every day.”

“Good.” Now if only Julie would wake, too, Mark might believe they were getting out of this disaster.

He looked down at her, his eyes narrowing. Had there been a shift in her breathing? Had her eyes twitched? With Carl distracting him, he couldn't watch her with his regular focus.

“You need to get some real sleep,” Carl said. “In a bed.”

“I just need some—”

“Coffee.”

Mark and Carl froze at the rasping voice. Had that been Julie? He almost couldn't bring himself to believe. But he hadn't said it. And from Carl's face, it hadn't been the alpha, either.

Mark lifted her hand to his lips and squeezed her fingers. “I promise to get you a triple mocha if you'll just open your eyes. Come on, Jules. Extra whip with a drizzle of caramel.” After hitting research mode with her a few days back, he knew exactly how she liked her caffeine and sugar.

Her eyelids fluttered, and she frowned. Carl moved to the side table and brought her a glass of water, pressing the straw against her lips. Young shifters were always dehydrated when they woke. Mark's bear dug at him, reminding him that no other man should serve his mate. It was true, but Mark was too busy gently chafing Julie's hand to handle the water.

“Come on, baby. Open those pretty brown eyes for me.”

She didn't. But she did open her mouth enough for Carl to put the straw inside. And then she drank. She really drank the water, which was the best sign of approaching consciousness that he'd had from her. But the very next was even better.

She spit out the straw. “You promised me a mocha latte.”

Then she opened her eyes. Relief flooded his system when their gazes connected. He could see everything in them. Groggy recognition and signs of temper. Every shifter on the planet came out of their first change with the exact same cranky pants attitude. Not to mention a killer hangover. But they could deal with that as long as she was awake. As long as she was alive.

Then her eyes slipped closed again.

“Wake up, baby,” he said. “I've got news.” If coffee couldn't lure her into awareness, then information would. He was sure of it.

And just like magic, her expression tightened into a frown. “I turned into a bear.”

She'd turned partly into a bear. She hadn't the DNA for a full shift, but it had been enough for his grizzly to recognize her. For his bear to claim her and the mating bond to lock into place. But he would explain those details later. Right now, she had to accept that she was part shifter.

“Yes, you did,” he said, keeping his voice carefully neutral. Not everyone wanted to be burdened with a strong animal side. For many, the costs far outweighed the benefits. If she hated what she'd become—

“Cool.”

“What? Are you hot? Do you need—”

She opened her eyes to glare at him. “No, silly. It was cool. Will I be able to do it again?”

Now there was Julie, aware and demanding answers. He'd never seen a more beautiful sight. “Don't know. How about you get stronger and we'll try it again?”

“Maybe,” Carl interrupted. “If you feel up to it. But don't push it and don't go trying anything without talking to us first.”

Julie rolled her eyes. “Mother Hen,” she drawled, making Mark laugh. Carl, too, though he tried to hide it.

“I'm your alpha now, Julie. You're going to have to listen to me.”

Her eyes focused on him. “No one else does. Why do I have to?”

Carl growled at her, a sound that was half affection and half exasperation. “Mark is so
not
doing your orientation. He's a bad influence. And everyone does listen—”

“How's Alan?” she interrupted, the concern in her voice effectively deflating Carl's annoyance.

“Better. Stronger. And alive, thanks to you.”

She shook her head. “I couldn't bond with him. I don't think he wanted it.”

“But you kept him together until we could get there. I can't thank you enough for that.”

She exhaled slowly, her eyes drifting shut. “I feel like I've been hit by a truck.” She cracked an eye to stare at Mark. “Or a really big grizzly.”

He smiled, leaning forward until he was within kissing distance. “Is that a bad thing?” He didn't want her to know how desperately he wanted to hear her answer. Apparently, she was okay with being a bear. Was she okay with him? Was she—

“You promised me news, and I'm not kissing you until I get it.”

Well, okay. That was a promising start. At least she wasn't tossing him out of the room.

“You're a Gladwin shifter now. Alan's healing. Mad Einstein is in custody and helping, though most of us want to kill him slowly and painfully.”

“Sign me up on that side.”

He smiled. He liked her bloodthirsty side. But that meant he would wait to tell her that the cougar bitch had gotten away. Meanwhile, she shifted her legs without opening her eyes. Her body was waking, and she would likely get more irritable as the day went on. It took time to adjust to the steady presence of an animal side. But a couple analgesics or a few stiff shots would take care of that, too. Which meant now was the best time to give her the rest.

“I want to marry you, Julie. However you want, as soon as you want. We're bonded now, and I don't think I can live without you, but that's not why I want to marry you. I love you. Completely. Totally. I have since we were sixteen. My bear knew from the moment we kissed way back then, and again when you woke me from a sound sleep a week ago. But the man in me loves the way your mind works with such focus even when the rest of the world is going to hell. I love the way you laugh and that you give yourself so easily to everything you do. I love that you see through my bullshit and make me want you even when you're telling me I'm an ass. Julie, every part of me loves you completely, totally, irrationally, and wonderfully. Please, for the love of God, will you say something?”

She stared at him, her eyes wide open and her mouth slightly ajar. She tried to push herself upright, but the bed blanket wasn't cooperating. It caught under her elbow as she shoved herself up. He wanted to help her—reached for her—but he held her other hand captive in his.

Carl pushed the correct button on the hospital bed, electronically sitting her upright. Not so fortunately, the alpha didn't have a muzzle on.

“Jesus, man, you have got to work on your timing.”

Mark shot him a glare, but Julie pointed at the alpha. “What he said.”

Oh. Right. Well, that sucked. Meanwhile, Julie spent a moment running her free hand through her hair to smooth it down. Mark caught her fingers and pulled them down to press another kiss to her knuckles.

“You have never looked more beautiful to me. And I know my timing sucks, but I wasn't going to let another second go by without telling you how much I love you. I do. I love you. Please say you feel something of the same for me.”

She straightened up. “I did. Don't you remember? Well, maybe not because you were a bear at the time.”

“I remember.” Though in honesty, the meaning was fuzzy in his mind. He mostly remembered her tone and the way her scent had called to him. “But tell me again. Please?”

She took a deep breath. “I love you, Mark. I can't wait to marry you. And as soon as I'm out of this hospital bed, I want to show you exactly how much.” Then she gave him an impish look. “Um…does being a shifter mean that I'm constantly horny?”

His eyes widened. “Um, not usually.”

“Huh. Okay. Then that must be because of you.”

It took him a moment to understand what she was saying. And then her impish look turned downright sultry and nothing could keep him away. He crushed her to him, his mouth finding hers in a desperate rush of need. She met him with ease, her mouth open and receptive, but once he rushed in, the fireworks really began. She kissed him like he'd always dreamed. With passion. With need. With an underlying knowledge in the bond between them that he was hers and she was his. Mates. For life.

A nurse separated them. A harridan in white who physically dragged him back. “Mr. Robertson! Control yourself.”

He was a half breath away from pushing her aside, but Carl held up his hand. “Sorry. She just agreed to marry him. He might have gotten a little too enthusiastic.”