Libertine's Wife (33 page)

Garret shouted for his driver. He fumed
it took the man so long to bring the coach around. His eyes filled
with overwhelming grief. It seemed to take forever getting to
Vale’s residence. He reasoned she had to be alive, as he hadn’t
been contacted of her death, sick to think he’d driven her to such
a thing. Thoughts of her with Vale maddened him enough to hurt her
even more than he already had. Never did he imagine she would do
the unthinkable.

When he arrived, Garret didn’t bother
to knock and flung the door open wide. He glared at the startled
butler with a fierce scowl, daring him to say a word. The man
backed away, looking fearful. He ran up the stairs two at a time,
shouting his wife’s name. He saw a maid at the end of the hall. He
caught up to her fleeing form. He grasped her by the scruff of her
uniform, demanding to know where his wife’s room was.

“
She’s not here, my lord!”
the maid cried, looking scared as she shied away from him. “Lord
Vale made the arrangements.”

“
Where did he take her? Is
she alive?” Garret demanded harshly.

The maid looked rattled and confused.
“I don’t know! The doctor said she might die! He didn’t say where
he was taking her, my lord!”

“
Did he say anything at
all?” Garret snarled and the girl’s eyes flew wide with
terror.

“
He said he was taking her
home, my lord!”

Garret let her go and the terrified
maid ran as fast as she could. The devastation he felt made him
close his eyes, feeling a sickening dread in the pit of his stomach
to think his wife succeeded in taking her own life.

His grief made him bend at his knees,
his head in his hands, feeling overwhelming guilt to think his
actions drove her to such an extreme. He got up and calmed himself,
taking shaky breaths, trying to think.

Garret refused to believe he was too
late. The thought she might be dead already lingered as he left
Vale’s residence. Once home, he locked himself in his study,
anguished and grieving. When he ran out of brandy, he sent Elliot
for more. He spent an uncomfortable evening, feeling the pain of
his loss so profoundly; he began to cry, unable to conceive she was
gone.

~ ~ ~

“
I wasn’t really serious
about wanting to live in a fishing village in a cottage overlooking
the sea,” Arianne grumbled, rolling her eyes as she sat up in the
bed, eying Julian with a shake of her head. “I don’t recall ever
telling you that! Your memory is awful!”

Julian grinned as he sat at her
bedside, pushing a strand of hair out of her face. His dark eyes
filled with amusement. “Actually it was a whaling village, but I
couldn’t find one,” he said and dimpled at her. “This is as close
as I could get.”

Arianne’s eyes slid away from his
suddenly. He grasped her chin, forcing her to look at him. Tears
filled her eyes at his look of compassion. Ever since she woke to
realize she was still alive and she failed to end her misery,
Julian came up with some silly means to keep her from trying again.
Talking about how they made wishes at the pond behind Vale House
was merely a means to take her mind off her grief.

The bandages around her wrists were
enough reminder of her pain. The wounds itched as they healed. They
didn’t talk about what she tried to do. She could see it in his
eyes. Her actions affected him deeply.

“
I’m sorry about what I
tried to do, Julian,” she whispered as tears filled her
eyes.

“
I never wish to see you so
low again, Arianne. Please don’t let him destroy you.” Julian drew
her close, holding her against his hard chest. “We don’t ever have
to go back if you don’t want to, my love.”

Arianne sniffled and enjoyed the feel
of Julian’s comfort. He’d been unfailingly supportive these last
three weeks since she recovered. She had little memory of his
bringing her here.

Julian rented a lovely little cottage
on a hill overlooking the sea. He cared for her while she regained
her strength. The loss of blood nearly killed her; he told her
gravely when she woke up. He stared down at her in fury before he
became too overwhelmed and held her while she cried.

“
Arianne, I know you can’t
see a life for yourself right now,” Julian told her as he stroked
her hair, his hand trembling slightly. “I know losing the children
and your husband hurt you terribly, but I’m here for you. Don’t
ever try to leave me again.”

Arianne looked up at him and saw he
meant what he said. She knew he still loved her, saw it in his
eyes. His lips took hers, the kiss unthreatening and sweet, meant
to soothe more than arouse. He lifted his head and regarded her
warmly.

“
I took the liberty of
catching our dinner,” Julian informed her proudly. He got up and
went to a pail near the door and held up the scrawniest fish she’d
ever seen.

Arianne burst out laughing through her
tears. “That wouldn’t even be enough for Jaime to eat, much less
one of us!”

Julian chuckled and pulled a basket off
the table he purchased in the village and began pulling out items
he bought from the women there. “Yes, well, when we made all those
wishes by the pond, we should have both taken the time to learn to
fish.” He chuckled as he spread out the bounty within. There was a
rich hearty stew, fresh bread, fruit pies, and a bottle a
wine.

Arianne knew the cabin was stocked with
everything they would need during their stay. The attention to her
comfort reminded her of how much this man adored her. Her gaze
softened, seeing at once what a fool she was to ever let him
go.

Had she not put what she wanted for him
ahead of what he wanted for himself, none of the terrible things in
the last four years would have happened. They would have gotten
married and raised their son, possibly had another child by now
too.

Julian said they would stay here until
she was ready to go back. She leaned back against the pillows of
the cottage’s only bed and wondered if she would ever be able to.
Thoughts of never seeing her children again made her not want to
live anymore. Her children were gone two months now and the pain of
it was rarely diminished.

Julian was determined she would get
beyond the depression that set in when she lost her children to her
husband’s anger. Each day she woke without Jaime and Stephen cut at
her heart. She realized trying to take her own life was a foolish
thing to do.

Those moments were dark and bleak when
she took the knife in her hand, so distraught over losing her
husband and sons. She barely felt the blade slice into her skin,
hardly realized she was doing what she did. She pushed those
thoughts away, determined to avoid dwelling upon how she reacted to
the loss.

“
I seem to recall other
wishes we made by that pond,” Arianne informed him as he brought
her a small platter of food and set it on the bedside table. “You
wished to buy me the biggest clock in the world so I would never be
late in meeting you there again. To this day, I’m rarely late for
anything.”

Julian smiled fondly. “Yes, you were
never late after that, as I recall.”

“
It’s too bad none of those
wishes ever came true for us, Julian,” Arianne whispered and her
lips trembled as she looked at him, her eyes bruised and
fragile.

Julian took the bowl from the platter
and raised a dark eyebrow. “Some of mine did. Speak for
yourself.”

Arianne accepted the bowl and ate the
delicious stew. Finally, curiosity got the better of her. She set
the bowl on the table and regarded him suspiciously as she sipped
the delicious homemade wine. “Which one of your wishes ever came
true? I can’t recall any of those overblown dreams of yours ever
coming to fruition,” she accused and accepted a piece of bread from
him.

“
I didn’t tell you
everything, Arianne.” Julian continued to eat, clearly not planning
to tell her anything else.

“
Alright, out with it,”
Arianne demanded when he finished, her curiosity getting the better
of her. “Now you must tell me.”

Julian chuckled and broke off a piece
of the apple fruit pie and brought it to her lips, watching her eat
it with relish, his dark eyes filled with emotion.“I made a wish by
the pond the night I left your room. I was angry you broke off with
me,” he told her quietly. “I asked that you come back to me under
any circumstances, promising to never question it or hesitate,
should that ever happen.”

Arianne stared at him in stunned
silence, a stab of discomfort to realize neither of them was free
to be with the other. Even if Garret followed through with his
intent to divorce her, Julian was still married to Drusilla. “We
are married to other people, Julian. What either of us wants
doesn’t matter anymore, don’t you see?”

Julian placed another piece of the pie
to her lips, cutting off whatever else she would say.

“
I no longer care, Arianne.
I have loved you for years, never stopped loving you, even when you
married Ravensford.”

“
We have no future, Julian,”
she protested as she met his gaze. “What is it you are asking of
me?”

“
Stay with me as you have,
Arianne,” Julian said and brought her hand to his lips. “Be the
wife of my heart. I don’t want to be without you anymore. I want
you to stay and live with me.”

“
What of your real wife?”
Arianne trembled under his intense regard. “What of her? You can
hardly forget your responsibilities to her or your
title.”

“
I don’t think I’ve said two
sentences to the woman in years, Arianne. Is it fair to her the way
I feel for you? I don’t give a damn about her, the title, none of
it! It’s only you I care about, and our son. The title can go to my
cousin Renleigh. Mother won’t like it, but I don’t care to please
her anymore.”

“
What of Garret?” Her gaze
grew bleak. “What if he changes his mind and decides he wants me
back again? He is still my husband, Julian. He can force me to go
home. What then?”

Julian stared at her sadly and looked
away. “I sent your husband word of your condition when I found you.
I feared you’d die, my love. The doctor left you in God’s hands.
Ravensford never acknowledged it, not a word did I hear from him. I
waited over a week and then I brought you here.”

Arianne swallowed hard, feeling fierce
pain in the pit of her stomach. Tears brightened her gaze to know
Garret didn’t care. He turned his back upon her even then, too
angry to care if she lived or died. She felt she would choke on the
pain of his ultimate rejection.

She had a man in front of her who
adored her, no matter what she’d done. Julian held nothing back,
gave her his whole heart. They had a child together. What he asked
of her, to live together openly, would cause a scandal that would
shock society. Garret would be furious, just for the embarrassment
it would cause him. The lack of discretion would ruin her
reputation. Without her husband and her children, she no longer
cared what the world thought of her.

Her heart was devastated. This man who
sat before her was the closest thing to salvation since this whole
dreadful situation began, the one constant she could count
upon.

Arianne’s eyes met his without
hesitation. “I will stay with you, Julian.”

He reached out and touched her cheek,
his heart in his gaze. “Then my wish has come true.”

~ ~ ~

Garret had weeks after his wife’s
attempt on her life and disappearance to realize he couldn’t
possibly keep her out of his life and heart. He needed to find it
within him to forgive her. He knew she was alive. Vale wouldn’t
have kept that a secret these many weeks. The fact he had yet to
return told him Arianne was alive and with him.

His new son wailed incessantly, was
fussing constantly, and the nurses couldn’t soothe him. The boy was
nearly three months old. Jaime cried for his mother too, reminding
him he had no right to the boy at all.

Vale’s barrister submitted a claim to
the boy that Garret denied; assuring the courts the child was his.
He would not relinquish his claim. Helms held them off and the law
was on his side.

Garret wanted his wife back. He
realized it too late. It was more than the children’s needs. It was
the emptiness he felt to think of her gone from his life. When he
thought her dead, he wept in rage and denial. He realized he loved
her, no matter what she’d done.

Wherever Vale took her, he left no
trail behind for him to follow. It was as if the pair simply
vanished. He hired a detective who found out nothing about his
wife’s whereabouts. Wherever they were, they were in no hurry to
get back.

Time passed with agonizing slowness for
him. He paid a servant in the man’s household to let him know if
Lord Vale sent word of his whereabouts. There was no word. Even
Vale’s mother and wife had no idea where Julian was.

Garret spoke with the dowager. Lady
Adeline St. Ives knew nothing. Meeting the new Lady Vale was
somewhat of a shock. He’d heard the woman was a hideous eyesore.
Meeting the beautiful redhead made him more than a little
confused.

Not only was Lady Vale,
Drusilla St. Ives, not the eyesore he’d once heard she was; she
possessed a refined grace. She never faltered during the interview
where she became aware of
her
husband running away with
his
wife. Her large blue-green eyes
were quite extraordinary and hardly blinked during the
uncomfortable discussion. He thought Vale was even more of an idiot
after meeting her.