Leverage (The Brannock Siblings) (7 page)

Her dad was gone. Her hero.

It had taken every bit of strength he had to listen to
Mark's words. They had tried to revive him, tried to save him, but there was
nothing they could do.

The second he got inside, he put his things down on the
table next to the door and looked around for Ash, almost missing her when he
passed his living room. She was curled up in a ball on his big leather recliner
with her head hanging at an awkward angle and her hair covering her face. It
looked like she hadn't meant to fall asleep, but hadn't been able to hold on
any longer.

He quietly walked over to her and gazed down at her tiny
frame. She looked so small, almost lost in the cushions of the chair. She had
always been so short, he remembered, like her mother, Isabelle. It didn't help
his need to engulf her in his arms and protect her from anything that could
possibly harm her.

He reached out to brush the hair back from her face and she
stirred at the contact. Her eyes fluttered open and when she looked up at him,
he knew his world would never be the same. No matter how much he fought it or
how much he didn't deserve her, he would always know she was it for him, and he
would do anything for her.

Anything.

"Lucas?" she said, her voice nothing more than a
whisper.

His heart was still pounding hard against his chest, hadn't
stopped since she had first pounded on his door. He knelt down in front of the
chair as she straightened herself to face him.

"What time is it?" she rasped and rubbed a hand
over her eyes. They were red rimmed and swollen from all the crying she had
done. He felt like such an asshole leaving her all alone without knowing what
was happening. It must have been torture for her.

"It's after six. I just got in." His throat felt
raw and his voice was husky when he spoke. He didn't like feeling this way. So
helpless.

She looked down at her hands. They were shaking and she was
trying to hold them steady while she took deep breaths. Trying to be strong
when she didn't have any strength left in her. He reached out and grasped her
hands in his, they were so cold and small, and he steadied them for her while
he smoothed his thumbs over the silky skin of her knuckles.

"Look at me, Ash."

He needed her stormy grey eyes on his. He needed to make
sure she understood what he was about to say. When her eyes lifted, he almost
decided to lie to her, just so he wouldn't have to see her cry again. He
couldn't do that, though, not when he needed her to trust him now more than
ever before.

"He's gone… isn't he," she stated softly.

He couldn't get the words out. Couldn't tell her that
everything was going to be okay, because he wasn't sure what the hell was going
to happen now. Liam had found something, and he didn't get the chance to tell
anyone before they took care of him.

"I'm so sorry, baby."

"I should have done something. I should have done CPR
or… something. I didn't even check his pulse to see if he was still alive. Why
didn't I do that? He told me to come here, so I did."

He realized that he never did either. The ambulance had
arrived quickly and there wasn't time to do anything at all but pray for a
miracle.

"It was someone who knew him, Lucas," she said
fiercely. She looked like she was about to burst, but she didn't cry. She was
letting herself be furious, which was the right thing to do, otherwise, she
might not make it through.

"How do you know that?" he asked, just now
remembering that she had heard them talking while she had been hiding in the
closet.

"The guy knew he was 63 years old, had mentioned it to
the other one, he knew that he had found something. He said they couldn't move
forward until he was clear. He sounded so familiar, Lucas. I swear I had heard
his voice before."

"Shit, that could only mean what we had been thinking
all along," he bit out and shook his head. He had trusted all the men he
worked with. Every single one of them. Trusted them with his life. Now he knew
for sure one of them had betrayed them all.

"Dad was so upset when he got home. He said he found
some things that may mean disappointment." She pulled a hand away from his
and combed her fingers through her long hair. Then her eyes widened as if she
just remembered something important right before that same hand covered her
mouth and those eyes started to water again.

"Oh, God. He knew they were going to come for
him."

"What?"

"He hugged me like he was terrified, Lucas. Told me he
loved me, like he was saying goodbye. He
knew
."

She was sobbing now and new tears fell down her cheeks. He
couldn't hold himself back anymore, he had to hold her, to protect her, comfort
her. So he pulled her off the chair and onto his lap, wrapping his arms around
her and locking her tiny body against his chest while she let it all out.

"I'll find him, Ash. I swear to you, I'll find out who
did this."

"I-I need to go back there. I need to clean up
and…" she sniffed and choked on her words.

"You aren't going anywhere. You're staying here with
me. I don't want you in that house alone and we can't let anyone know you are
here."

"But the funeral. They'll know anyway in a few
days."

"Then I have a few days to figure something out. For
now, you live here, where I can keep an eye on you."

She nodded, "I have to call my brothers."

Damn! He didn't have a chance to think about that either. He
had been so focused on getting back to Ash, he didn't let Conall and Fergus
know what was happening. They would want to come to Oakland and help with the
investigation, he knew it and he couldn't tell them no.

"Why don't you get yourself together first. Take a
shower and a few deep breaths. We have a lot to do and I need to make sure you
are okay before I will be able to focus on anything else."

"Okay," she whispered.

He didn't like how agreeable she was being, like she had
given up on taking her life into her own hands. It wasn't her, but he didn't
say anything about it because it was probably the only time she would do what he
asked from now on. She wasn't angry enough yet, but she would be.

He set her up to shower in his bathroom and dressed so he
could run back to her house and grab her some clothes. Everyone had cleared out
of there already and wouldn't be back for a while.

"Do you know what he meant?" she asked from the
bathroom door while he pulled on a shirt and shoes.

"About knowing what you'll need?"

She nodded.

"Not yet. But I'll figure it out. I do know that you
needed your things. The ones in your closet. They are on the table by the front
door."

Her shoulders sagged in relief and he figured she had been
planning on getting those things as soon as possible. Thankfully she had showed
him her secret spot so long ago or he would have to let her go back.

"Thank you," she said and turned into the
bathroom. Before she shut the door, she paused and looked back to him.
"Did anyone see you get them?" Her spot had been a secret for so
long, the one thing only her and her father knew about. It would be important
to her to keep it safe.

"No, I got it while everyone was heading out. No one
saw me."

At least he hoped no one saw him. He couldn't tell if the
shadow he saw pass by her door out of the corner of his eye was his imagination
or someone watching him. Everyone had been downstairs when he walked out of the
room, though, so he knew he was only seeing things. He had been so tired. Why
wouldn't
he be seeing things that weren't there?

"Good," she said, then shut the bathroom door.

He hurried out of the house to get her things, planning on
doing another run through the house to see if he could find anything else. The
captain was a smart man. He wouldn't have found something and not tried to let
someone know, especially since he was aware of the danger to his life. To his
daughter's life.

"I know you left a clue, Liam. Show me where it
is."

Ash

I had washed my father's blood off of my hands after calling
the police when Lucas left, but I felt his blood all over me now.

Dad was dead.

Could I have done anything more to save him?

If I hadn't left so selfishly to go on a run, would I have
been able to protect him? Or would I have been shot, too? Or worse.

I couldn't get the image of his unconscious body out of my
mind or the guilt I felt for just leaving him on the floor of my bedroom to run
to Lucas.

"It's what he told you to do, Ash," I muttered to
myself.

It didn't make me feel any better about it.

I turned on the shower after I heard Lucas leave and let it
warm up, stripping out of my running clothes that I had been sitting in for far
too long. My skin felt clammy, my face was swollen from all the crying, and my
chest hurt from the misery I felt.

What would my brothers say?

They were going to be furious. They were going to come here
the second I told them what had happened and I needed them to. I needed my
brothers to be here to mourn with me. They were all I had left of my dad and I
was all
they
had.

I had been staring at myself in the mirror as it started to
fog up from the steam swirling through the bathroom. Lucas was right. I had to
get myself together. I couldn't be a burden to him while he was looking for my
father's killer and trying to stop Frank Banetti from bringing anymore drugs
through our port.

I had looked at some of the files in the last two weeks, I
couldn't be kept in the dark. I had needed to know who I was hiding from and
what they were capable of if they tried to use me.

Guess I didn't need to worry about that anymore, though.
They didn't have any leverage over my father anymore since they killed him.
They couldn't use me. It would be pointless. I had to find a way to help, but
Lucas felt like he needed to keep me hidden, like there was still a chance that
I was in danger.

Why? I had no idea.

I shook my head and climbed into the shower, letting the hot
water pound on my back. I washed my hair and scrubbed my body, trying to erase
the worst night of my life. When I was finished, I couldn't force myself out of
the shower. The hot water was releasing all the tension in my muscles and I
didn't want to get out and feel everything all over again. I was safer in
there.

I stood under the stream of water for I don't know how long,
but all too soon, the water started to cool and my fingers and toes were
wrinkled. I looked down at my hands and thought I saw the blood on them all
over again, felt the cold metal of the shotgun as I clutched it to my chest
while listening to the men who killed my father… hiding.

I couldn't take it anymore. I thought I had let it out, but
I hadn't. I was pissed, devastated, confused. I had no clue how to focus on one
emotion and get rid of it. My head buzzed and my lips numbed as I started to
hyperventilate.

I sunk to the tile floor and hugged my legs to my chest,
closing my eyes to concentrate on my breathing and leaning back against the wall.
My body trembled uncontrollably and the water turned cold, the feel of it
sending ice through my veins.

Then it stopped.

The water wasn't washing over me anymore, but I still
couldn't leave the confines of the shower. Out there was the death of my father,
a killer who was hiding on the inside of my father's most trusted circle, a
drug lord who was making Lucas' life hell.

Then there were arms wrapping around me. Arms that I felt
safe in, that chased away the chill from the cold water.

"Aislinn," a deep voice murmured in my ear.

Lucas.

The one man I had to trust with my life when he had broken
my heart so long ago. But I
could
trust him. He was always honest with
me, even if what he had to say might hurt me.

He rubbed my back and arms, now covered in goose bumps from
the icy water. "Baby, you're freezing. Let's get you dry."

"No," I choked out. "No, it's safe in here.
It's better in here. I don't have anything left out there."

His arms tightened around me and a hand swept my hair out of
my eyes and combed through the wet strands, then rested on the back of my head,
holding me against his warm chest. His shirt was soaked and his gray sweat
pants were darkened from sitting on the wet tile floor.

I know what I had just said and I was aware that I still had
my brothers, but they had their own lives. Away from here. I didn't have one
anymore.

I was pretty much alone now, but Lucas' being near me took
away some of the trembling.

"You have me, Ash. You'll always have me, I promise you
that."

Yeah, until this case is over and done with and there is
no need to be my bodyguard anymore
, I thought.

"You're wrong."

Oh shit, did I say that out loud?

"Yes, you did," he said and I could hear the smile
in his voice

"God, I'm a nut job."

He chuckled and then stretched his arm to the towel bar,
yanked one down and wrapped it around me. "You're not a nut job. Just
having a bad week."

He stood and lifted me into his arms, keeping the towel
wrapped around me and his eyes forward. The pain in my chest subsided and I
realized the safest place for me was exactly where I was at.

Then I finally comprehended how naked I was and gasped.

"Don't. Don't say anything," he said huskily.
"It's not a big deal."

But it was to me. And at a time like this? It shouldn't be,
but it was, and Dad would have had a conniption. How did he do that? Make all
the bad go away and force me to think of something ludicrous?

First guy to see me naked seems like a pretty big deal,
even under the circumstances
, I thought.

He stumbled and almost dropped me, but thankfully the bed
was right there and he set me down carefully. "The first?" he asked
incredulously.

Damn, I really needed to work on not saying my thoughts out
loud.

"How is that possible, Ash?"

I couldn't look him in the eye. Now wasn't the time to discuss
this even though I had just revealed the fact that I was a 28 year old virgin
after keeping it hidden for so long, but he had a way of distracting me. I had
been hiding my whole life in one way or another. Guess things would never
change.

Thankfully, the phone rang in the next second and saved me
from saying anything else that was completely unnecessary. He stared at me for
a moment before he grabbed the cordless handset off of his nightstand and
turned to leave the room without looking back. He cleared his throat before he
spoke. "Your clothes are on the bed. Come to the kitchen when you are
ready and I'll make you something to eat. Then we'll call your brothers."

He shut the door behind him and I heard him answer the
phone, abruptly saying, "Shade," before his footsteps faded.

"Ash, you idiot," I groaned.

I was going to be living with Lucas until he figured out
what to do with me, I didn't need to be revealing anything about myself that
might put us into an awkward situation. It was
already
awkward enough
and I had too many other things to worry about besides Lucas Shade.

Dad was gone and I hadn't the faintest clue how to deal with
that.

***

As I expected, my brothers were both on the next flight out
to come to Oakland and they were both extremely pissed off, and not just about
Dad.

Each had yelled at me for ten minutes for even going into
the house to find him. When I told them I had the shotgun with me, they yelled
even more. They didn't like the idea of me taking care of myself or taking any
kind of initiative
at all
.

"What if there had been a whole bunch of them, Ash? You
think you would have been able to take them all out with that shotgun? You
should have gone straight to Lucas. What the fuck, Ash? Did you not retain
anything
we have taught you?"

It was at that point that I started bawling all over again
and it was the last straw. I already felt guilty enough for not being able to
help Dad. I didn't need them telling me everything else I had done wrong.

Not surprisingly, the next words to each of them were,
"Fuck you," before Lucas took the phone from me and did some damage
control.

Well, I wouldn't call it damage control as much as cussing
them both out.

"Save it for when you get here, asshat, so I can be
close enough to put my fist to your nose  for talking to your sister like
that."

I guess it was kind of odd that each conversation was almost
identical, but my brothers were so alike when it came to me. They loved me and
they cared what happened to me. A lot of people don't get to say that about
their siblings.

Both times, after Lucas calmed them down, he handed the
phone back to me and told me to tell them I loved them and I didn't hesitate to
do it. Dad made sure I knew how much he loved me before he was gone, I couldn't
let my brothers go without doing the same in case something happened before
they got to me.

Is that how I would have to live the rest of my life?
Wondering if the next time I saw them would be the last? I dreaded that kind of
life and the fear that came with it.

I was eating the oatmeal and fruit Lucas had dished out for
me and feeling completely worthless. My brothers were going to come here and do
whatever they could to help with the investigation and what was
I
going
to do? Hide.

"They didn't mean it, Ash. They are just upset."

I looked up to find Lucas leaning back against the counter
across the kitchen with his arms folded over his broad chest and his shoulders
stretching his t-shirt so perfectly. I was wearing a pair of black sweats that
had been cut into shorts and a bright blue tank top that was probably a little
too small for me and I felt like a mouse compared to this lion. Why did he
always look so damn good? It was like God was dangling the thing I most desired
in my face and saying, "Too bad you can't have it."

I shook my head and remembered that he had said something.

"I know. I'm not thinking about that."

"Then what
are
you thinking about?"

I sighed and pushed the bowl of fruit away, losing my
appetite and wishing that I could turn back the last couple of days, maybe even
the last couple of months.

"I feel so completely helpless," I whispered.

I missed Dad. He would have told me I was
never
helpless, that I could get through anything because I was strong, because I'm a
Brannock. Because I never let anyone or anything stop me from fighting for what
I wanted.

He had been wrong about that, though. I let
everyone
stop me from fighting for what I wanted. I let myself be locked away watching
my life pass me by and wishing that I could do something about it. Never even
trying.

"You're
never
helpless, Ash."

Of course he would say the exact same thing my dad would. He
was just as good of a guy. He was a hero, too.

"I'm sorry, I'm just still trying to process
everything. Dad's gone. What am I supposed to do now? Oh wait, I'm supposed to
stay locked up and hiding just like the last 28 years of my life, right?"

He looked down at the floor and his shoulders slumped.

Bingo!

"I want to
help
, Lucas."

He shook his head firmly, "No. It's too
dangerous."

"What about it is more dangerous? Everyone knowing I'm
here with you protecting me or no one knowing and getting into trouble anyway?
You can't protect me every second of the day, but I can help without anyone
knowing I'm helping."

"How do you think you are going to do that?"

I shrugged my shoulders, but begged him with my eyes, hoping
that he would have an idea.

He sighed and stepped toward me, "It's not like you can
just look up the answer on the internet or make a few phone calls. The minute
they know you are here, they'll use it."

"Why? They already killed Daddy. He was the only one
they would have had leverage over. Now we have the upper hand. I'm useless to
them. Right?"

He shook his head and his bright blue eyes dimmed with…
something.

"Right, Lucas?"

He took another step toward me until he was only a few feet
away, then stopped, looking away and shaking his head again, like he was
battling something inside his own head.

"I'll take that as a 'maybe'. So you try to come up
with an idea for how I
can
help until you can come up with a good enough
reason for why I
can't
." I stood from my chair and headed for the
kitchen door. His hand on my wrist stopped me.
Damn, he's fast
.

I swung around and ended up pressed against his chest and
didn't realize we were moving until I was pinned against the wall. His hands
pressed against the wall on either side of my head and caged me in.

"You don't understand, Aislinn," he grumbled, his
breath fanning my face and sending all kinds of tremors throughout my body. I
ignored them. I wasn't going to back down from this. Not this time, no matter
how weak I felt.

"Then explain it to me."

"If they saw you… with me… if… if they…" He was
having a hard time getting his words out and couldn't look me in the eye.

Lucas never had a hard time with words. He was always so sure
of himself, so sure of everything around him. I couldn't help but stare in
amazement. The mighty Lucas was stuttering and I was the only one on earth that
had ever witnessed it.

He took a deep breath and finally met my eyes, sky blue
against stormy gray. My heart beat faster when he didn't look away from me,
then his eyes roamed over my face slowly before stopping on my mouth.

Oh God, was he going to kiss me? Should I be hoping for it
as much as I was after everything that had happened over the last twenty-four
hours?